Alice Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Sorry, but I totally understand your DS's dislike of vacations. I absolutely hate them and end up being the one to rain on everyone else's parade. The whole experience just stresses me out. More than anything, it drives me NUTS to move at a snail's pace meandering around endlessly. In everyday life, I pick an activity, formulate a plan and then execute said plan with relative efficiency. On vacation, everyone wants to dawdle here and there. No one else wants to have a plan. It is seriously, like my own personal hell. That said, I liked visiting Washington DC a few years ago and it was actually really enjoyable for all of us. This sounds like my dh and his entire family. His Dad always had a thing where he'd start the day on a vacation with "The program for today is..." and then give you the schedule. My family is very much the lie around and meander kind. Luckily, we laugh about it. Dh will ask "What's the program?" when we're on our beach vacation and just lying around the house reading and I"ll say "Pretty much this." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HS Mom in NC Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 When my older two were 9 and 7 and we were waiting for our youngest (an infant) to come to the US for her international adoption, we took a 10 day family vacation to see the most spectacular natural wonders in the Northern half of AZ. We listened to Huckleberry Finn on CD as we drove. We took a 3 hour open jeep tour through Canyon De Chelly, a small plane tour around the Grand Canyon, a boat tour of Lake Powell, and a foot tour of Antelope Canyon. It was beautiful and the older two, now 18 and 16, still think it's one of the best vacations we ever took. When we go on other vacations we have to alternate days with activities and seeing the sights and days lazing around the beach or campsite to accommodate all the different personality types. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jrstarfleetacademy Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 I am not an outdoor person at all but our favorite family vacation was to Arkansas. We camped, hiked and fished at Ouachita (wash-it-taw) State Park and mined for quartz crystal at Coleman Quartz. We stayed for 4 days - Sunday arrival through Wednesday evening. When we were there, we dug for crystal on Monday and they only bring out loads from the mines 2 times a week...we didn't know the schedule but got really lucky. It was awesome. You can rent boats for use on the lake and they also have cabins and a lodge available. We can't wait to do it again! http://www.arkansasstateparks.com/lakeouachita/#.Uw0aq0rwnis http://www.colemanquartz.com/default.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbgrace Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 I can see how a beach type vacation would be horrible for your son. They aren't my favorite, either, and I don't mind being barefoot or downtime either one! It sounds like he wants to be busy. I wonder about the DC area. Do you think that, or another big city type thing, might appeal to him? With young kids: Disney Without kids: Hawaii (big island actually). It wasn't beaches. We did a lot of touring--rain forest, volcano, etc. Islands of Adventure/Universal (we like amusement parks, these gear more to teens/adults) Sedona AZ trips (The Red Rock/scenery in Sedona is fantastic. We also did the Grand Canyon, Hoover Dam, etc. There is lots to see a day's drive from there). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlmiraGulch Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 I hate to say it, but ds has no interests which is why planning a vacation is difficult. But he's also easy going and will go along with just about anything. I'm thinking another beach trip, but it has to be somewhere that has museums which my son would like better than to be in the sand. He doesn't go barefoot ever, it squicks him out. One problem we have is we're on a school schedule. Dd doesn't homeschool anymore, so we can't just take off whenever we want. I really miss that! This would have to be a summer trip and I'll just cross my fingers that we don't end up in a crazy crowd. At our last beach vacation, it was a college graduation party with tons of students making noise on the beach. It wasn't as peaceful as we would have liked. If he likes to "do" stuff, and the rest of you like the beach, I suggest Isle of Palms, SC. It's a stone's throw from Charleston, which has a tone of history and tours and things to do and see that the whole family would enjoy, but the beach there is lovely. Or, Tybee Island / Savannah....same idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Our best vacations are when we split up a bit. We often stay at a cabin in the mountains. It is very relaxing for me and fun for the girls. My son, stopped going about the age of 16. He loves staying home at a friends house for the time we are gone, so that is his vacation. In the winter there is snow, in the summer there are lakes. We let dd15 bring a friend instead that helps to keep her entertained. Before we started letting ds stay home, it was very hard to find things that entertained all of the kids at the same time. My older kids are 4 years apart and they are 12/8 years older than our youngest. There is just no place that will make everyone happy. To keep ds in the family, I buy movies that he likes and we all watch them with him. Lately it has been Studio Ghibli movies. Next year we are taking just the big kids on vacation to Hawaii or something similar. DD7 is special needs and requires to many accommodations to make any destination vacation reasonable with her. Each summer dd15 and dh take a vacation together, to ride big roller coasters and other adrenaline pumping activities, like sky high zip lines and such. LOL DD7 spends a lot of time on our friends sail boat with dh. They have lots of day long or weekend long retreats. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 Ds is vacation resistant so I know how you feel. Like another poster said upthread, letting each person pick something to do really helps. As he gets older, he's started to expand his horizons and the past couple of years has actually enjoyed vacations, even when the day's activities are ones chosen by other family members. In December dd and I planned to spend a day in Savannah with my sister. At the last minute ds decided to join us and it was the most fun he had that whole week of vacation. My kids do NOT like Disney type vacations. Theme parks are not their idea of fun. They like road trips, seeing different things, museums, and historical sites. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom in High Heels Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 My favorite vacations are, by far, cruises. The rest of my family feels the same way. We love them, and leave for the next (at least DH and I do) in 1 month 8 days 5 hours 6 minutes and 48 seconds. :drool: 2nd to cruises are our "pick a random spot and go" trips, often where we can drive to. The last one was Chattanooga. We went for a long weekend and did all of the things you always drive past but never actually stop to do. Stayed in a nice hotel, ate like locals, did the touristy attractions. Great times. We've done the same thing in Savannah and Tybee Island (that was a week's worth), Jacksonville and St. Augustine (also a week's worth), Nashville, Asheville, Charleston / Isle of Palms.....you get the picture. P.S. And Hawaii. I adore Hawaii. Of course it was still a cruise..... Oh, yes, yes, yes, to the cruises! We love to cruise and can't wait to do another. Indy loves Disney, but he would pick a cruise over Disney any day. I like visiting cities. I could just walk for hours and look at stuff and people. I like museums. I like cities too! I love buildings, museums, etc. I like European cities though, because I like old buildings and castles and stuff. ;) Big bucks: the Disney cruise was just awesome and I'm not a Disney-type. Beach: We really, really enjoyed a Delaware beach called Rehoboth Beach. DC: I just love DC. If you I'd stay in the Omni DC. It's a tad off the beaten path, but has a resort vibe to it yet it's still in the city. Alley OMG, the Disney cruise IS the way to go. We have never been so spoiled in our lives. We were also crazy busy with all the activities, yet completely relaxed. We want to do the Disney Alaska cruise next year. I hope we do! We like DC too. If I had to pick a US city other than Chicago, I'd pick DC. Aside from the cruises, out favorite places are Disney (can't get enough!), London and Paris. I'm not a beach person or an outdoorsy person, so the thought of one of those just makes me cringe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoot Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 This sounds like my dh and his entire family. His Dad always had a thing where he'd start the day on a vacation with "The program for today is..." and then give you the schedule. My family is very much the lie around and meander kind. Luckily, we laugh about it. Dh will ask "What's the program?" when we're on our beach vacation and just lying around the house reading and I"ll say "Pretty much this." See, if that's the plan then that's fine, but please let me know. I usually don't really care WHAT the plan is, even if it's just lounging around with a book, just so long as there is one. However, everyone else is very much of the "let's just go and see where the day takes us variety." That is the point at which I want to poke out my eyes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marbel Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 This is the kind of vacation I don't like: when there is a vague plan to do something, and maybe some ideas as to what that something might be, but no one gets around to initiating it, so by default it turns into a lounge-around vacation. This happens with one particular branch of family. We gather at their place, they talk about things we might do, we agree that we'd like to do those things, and then... nothing happens. We sit around chatting, and then it's time to eat lunch, and clean up after lunch, then there's some chore that needs to be done and suddenly there's no time. It drives me insane. (I'm not in a position on these trips to say "Hey, I thought we were going to x. Can we plan to go [in 15 minutes, at 1:00, etc.]?" I can't avoid going, either. We do try to limit visits to these people but we can't just stop going.) I guess I wouldn't even call that a vacation but since it involves my husband taking vacation days from work that's what it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted February 26, 2014 Share Posted February 26, 2014 See, if that's the plan then that's fine, but please let me know. I usually don't really care WHAT the plan is, even if it's just lounging around with a book, just so long as there is one. However, everyone else is very much of the "let's just go and see where the day takes us variety." That is the point at which I want to poke out my eyes I'm the vacation planner here and everyone teases me about it. But when we're ON a trip, they all look at me and ask what's the plan for the day- so they definitely WANT a plan. Last year while I went to Rome with my sisters, dh and the two youngest kids took their own week long road trip. That they had to plan. OMG. All three of them realized just how much work goes into planning a week's worth of activities, including lodging and food. A few years ago I took a trip with my parents and sister- they had nothing really 'planned' just a vague list of things they wanted to do. How can I possibly be related to these people??? I wanted to poke my eyes out the entire time. But I sat back and let them run it...and one night dinner was so poorly planned that we had pizza delivered and ate on an ironing board in our hotel room. It was a lovely trip but I just felt like a pinball in a machine- bouncing around with no real direction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toawh Posted February 27, 2014 Share Posted February 27, 2014 I hate to say it, but ds has no interests which is why planning a vacation is difficult. But he's also easy going and will go along with just about anything. I'm thinking another beach trip, but it has to be somewhere that has museums which my son would like better than to be in the sand. He doesn't go barefoot ever, it squicks him out. One problem we have is we're on a school schedule. Dd doesn't homeschool anymore, so we can't just take off whenever we want. I really miss that! This would have to be a summer trip and I'll just cross my fingers that we don't end up in a crazy crowd. At our last beach vacation, it was a college graduation party with tons of students making noise on the beach. It wasn't as peaceful as we would have liked. You said your son has no interests in vacations but enjoys museums. Perhaps he equates vacation with a certain type of holiday. Maybe if you were to ask him what city in the world he would like to visit one day or something along those lines you could get some good ideas out of him. Does he like castles? Does he like art? Does he like technology? Is he a history buff? I can think of some cities that are like huge museums in themselves. Maybe he has a secret perfect vacation idea but he thinks it might not be super fun for the rest of the family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creekland Posted February 27, 2014 Share Posted February 27, 2014 I'm the vacation planner here and everyone teases me about it. I'm the planned in our family too, but I never get teased about it. The guys love it. I thoroughly enjoy my job - heck - it's not even a "job" since I enjoy it so much. I don't plan every minute as that, to us, wouldn't be a vacation. We need to be able to be spontaneous when out if we see something we'd rather do or weather concerns change things, so plans aren't written in stone, but they definitely make a great starting point. We visited a family once who did the sitting around talking about what to do thing... and barely got started doing anything until mid morning or later. It drove us nuts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 27, 2014 Author Share Posted February 27, 2014 When you say your son isn't a vacation person, what is it that he doesn't like? Is it the travel? Being in a different environment? Having to just sit around and "relax"? He doesn't like being away from home. He is uncomfortable sleeping anywhere other than his bed. He has Aspergers and so has a sort-of routine that he is used to. He is not an outdoorsy type, so he had zero interest in walking on the beach. He'll walk trails in woods and small mountains but he's out of shape and gets tired easily. He rarely complains though. He also doesn't like amusement parks. He doesn't like thrill rides. He doesn't like the idea of a big city, because of the noise and crowds. We agree on that point. I'd hate to go to a big city on vacation. I've decided that we'll do a series of weekend trips rather than planning an entire vacation. I know one place I'd like to visit that isn't far from my home. We could make it a day trip but if we stayed overnight, we could relax a little and not feel rushed. I'm actually having my children help me pick some places. That would give everyone a chance to find something he/she likes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Camelfeet Posted February 27, 2014 Share Posted February 27, 2014 Hard to pick, but I'd have to say Sri Lanka. The food was great, the animals and jungle amazing. I got nice doses of culture, food and nature. Dh liked out trip to Thailand best, but the animal exploitation (elephant riding, reptiles and fish slowly dying in buckets at markets etc) put a damper on things for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenn- Posted February 27, 2014 Share Posted February 27, 2014 He doesn't like being away from home. He is uncomfortable sleeping anywhere other than his bed. He has Aspergers and so has a sort-of routine that he is used to. He is not an outdoorsy type, so he had zero interest in walking on the beach. He'll walk trails in woods and small mountains but he's out of shape and gets tired easily. He rarely complains though. He also doesn't like amusement parks. He doesn't like thrill rides. He doesn't like the idea of a big city, because of the noise and crowds. We agree on that point. I'd hate to go to a big city on vacation. I've decided that we'll do a series of weekend trips rather than planning an entire vacation. I know one place I'd like to visit that isn't far from my home. We could make it a day trip but if we stayed overnight, we could relax a little and not feel rushed. I'm actually having my children help me pick some places. That would give everyone a chance to find something he/she likes. That sounds like a perfect solution. I hope you guys can enjoy the closer experiences. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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