---- Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trinchick Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 No suggestions but I can totally relate to "turning into a 10 year old myself." Sometimes when I hear myself I'm just shocked that I would ever respond this way to my child. I'm eager to hear any responses you get. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dragons in the flower bed Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 Backtalk is good for helping a family come up with a sense of verbal/relational boundaries, as well as ideas for what a fair parent might wish to do when those are crossed. (Ignore the "4 steps" stuff on the cover. The book can be prescriptive in places, but it presents the background ideas lucidly and thoroughly, inspiring the reader to effective change. It does take a punitive approach when it is prescriptive, but I did not find that entirely un-useful even though I rarely punish. Raising Our Children Raising Ourselves also is very helpful. It comes out of the non-coercive parenting movement, which I don't so much grok, but it is all about how to calm oneself down and notice our own reactions and be more present in the moment. Between those two books, when my kids became young adult-ish people, I found myself feeling pretty empowered to get my needs met without squishing anyone else's needs. I still frequently re-read How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk, too. That book, if you haven't read it, you must get. It's the best book ever, with lots of example conversations and ways to say things that won't make kids defensive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Kareni Posted February 11, 2014 Share Posted February 11, 2014 Any other recommendations? I've no first hand experience with this book, but it was highly recommended to me; it covers ages 10 through 15. The Rollercoaster Years by Charlene C. Giannetti Regards, Kareni Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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