Homeschoolers who choose not to do co-op or many extras

[Abbyjensen]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

[Jean in Newcastle]

Over the years I have not participated because:

 

we only had one car and dh is the one who had it.

I have a chronic illness and going out for activities is difficult for me

Trying to fit in a coop would take away too much from our academic subjects at  home (which are non-negotiable for me).

We can't afford it.

We have plenty of outside activities through the Y and don't need any more social outlets.

[regentrude]

1. Coop did not meet my kids' academic needs (in other words: glorified playgroup)

2. I work and it was really difficult for me to make it possible for my kids to attend a mid-morning coop, and to use my lunch hour to teach a class.

3. I do not enjoy teaching children who are not interested in academics.

 

 

Now that my kids are high school age, I use college courses if I want to outsource something

[Ellie]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

 

I started hsing before co-ops were invented. Turns out I didn't really need them. I did find, over the years, that being out of the house too often during the day was an epic fail for our lifestyle in general, so any co-op that met during the day would not be of interest to me at all. No sports, no dance/gymnastics/clubs of any kind, not during the day before, oh, 3 in the afternoon.

 

My support group provided plenty of socializing, on an informal basis.

 

I would not be interested in regular, large-group, age-segregated classes. I want to *home*school. I want to be with my dc. I want them to be with each other. I want to have the freedom to do our schedule the best way for us, to learn what is best for us, when it's best for us, in the method that is best for us and which I can change as needed, on the fly.

[lewelma]

There are no co-ops in  my city.  Plus, for me homeschooling is about individualizing the program for the student.  Co-ops can't do that.

 

Ruth in NZ

[kbutton]

I have had trouble finding one that didn't make it sound like I had to sign my life away. My husband works inconsistently crazy hours, so I am THE ONE if my kids need to go somewhere. I can't do that all the time, and I can't imagine adding teaching a class onto what I do at home, unless it was really, really fun. I recently learned about a co-op amazingly close to home that sounds like it might be a good fit, but we'll see. My kids do a gym class at the Y, but that is also really close, and I don't have to be there.

 

My older son can't handle too many appts. outside the house per week (needs lots of downtime and time to tinker away), and if they are at night, it's even more limited.

 

My kids do a Saturday program that is fun but academically enriching. I just have to get them there, and sit in on a class or two from time to time. Easy peasy.

 

[Mom2TheTeam]

I don't feel we need the academics at this point.  I would rather a social group that meets for fun park outings and such.  In my area, they are all academic based.

 

I have 6 kids 8 and under.  It is very hard for me to do any volunteering and I'm not interested anyway.

 

I have 6 kids 8 and under.  They often don't have anything for my littlest ones and they don't allow them at functions for older children or it's made very clear that they need to be seen and not heard...which I understand, but that is a show stopper for me because I have several littles and only one of me. 

 

I don't want the stress of the commitment each week.  We struggle as it is to get everything in.  Adding more would be too stressful.

 

We may join something when my children are older if I feel we need the supplement.  For now, I feel I provide them with what they need academically at home and the social interaction isn't what my family can work with. 

[a27mom]

I am early in my homeschooling career, but I haven't and don't intend to use co-ops at this point. We do have some "extracurriculars" - 4H, Awana, and swim and gym at the Y. We also get together informally with some other homeschool families.

 

A formal coop group doesn't appeal to me. I like being home and I don't see the need for it academically. I am very eclectic and relaxed, but picky about curriculum. Being out of the house another day is the most unappealing part.

[Loowit]

I joined a co-op and was part of it for a few years, but it just wasn't for me for a number of reasons.

 

1. It took up one whole day a week and didn't really provide any quality education.  Most of it was fluff and some of it because of the age ranges that we were stuck with were way too babyish for my kids.  So for me it wasn't worth taking up a whole day for co-op classes that weren't providing anything more than fun.

 

2. To get the classes my kids wanted I had to sign up to teach - to get early registration.  It required too much commitment on my part to do a class each week.

 

3.  The families were cliquish and we didn't fit in.  Most of them were already friends with each other and I am not an outgoing person by nature so trying to break into their circle just didn't work.

 

4.  It was overly religious and judgmental.  I am very conservative but this was way beyond my comfort zone.

 

5.  It wasn't working for my kids.  They were also having trouble making friends because of the cliques, and they are outgoing.

 

6. Cost. It wasn't horribly expensive, but more than I wanted to pay, especially when I was teaching and putting in a lot of time on my own.  I understood the fees, but when weighing the cost vs. the benefit I decided it wasn't worth it for my family.

[MysteryJen]

We did a little co-op for a few years. But no more. 

Reasons:

1. couldn't find one that lined up with academic standards

2. couldn't find a one that meshed well with religious beliefs

3. Morning are for school.

4. Too many problems trying to figure out the littles, when they were little.

5. Couldn't justify the expense.

[elegantlion]

We've been involved in one coop successfully, that was when ds was little and taking time out of the day wasn't a big deal. 

 

Other reasons they haven't worked or we didn't stay involved. Not all of these at once, we're in our 10th year of homeschooling:

 

- one car that dh had to take to work

- we start later than most and it interrupts the day too much

- one day off for a "social group" was a bit too much time away from academics

- couldn't afford to participate

- all expenses not disclosed up front, forcing us to pick and chose what to do

- ds didn't care about the activities

- ds wanted to do things not offered by coops or groups in our area

- age cutoffs - by middle school most community activities are through the school in our area

- (in one case) poorly run group meant the once a month activity rarely happened as scheduled. It really burned ds out on that activity because he never really got to try without a huge hassle. 

[Angie in VA]

1. Not enough money or time (while we were building our house, especially) which turned out to be a blessing (see #2)

 

2. I do not work and play well with others. 

 

3. What we did/do outside of the home is music (private lessons, orchestras, chamber groups), volunteer, sports, and speech & debate. 

 

 

I had hoped that my dc would play an instrument and do something physical every year of high school at least. It worked out that way (and started before high school), but it was not due to my diligent planning. My dc's talents, gifts and interests morphed our home school into something I never imagined but was/is wonderful. I don't see my dc having all the opportunities they had if we'd been tied to a co-op. Plus, and this is not an afterthought, we got to do exactly what subjects we wanted to, how we wanted to and when we wanted to, including earning college credit early. Works for us.

 

When dd graduated in June, a mom in line w/ me at the rehearsal (whom I'd never met) asked what co-op we were in. She was shocked that we'd never done any co-op. Ever. Dd was always homeschooled and we never did a co-op. Me? I was shocked that she was shocked!

[ThatHomeschoolDad]

1. The nearest co-op is conservative Christian. We are not.

2. The co-ops a bit farther away don't seem to be working with the level of academic rigor that we do.

3. There was a really odd pecking order at the large co-op we visited. I'm not much into drama and cliques.

4. DD already sings with a professional choir and has 2 evenings of dance, with independent GS work peppered here and there*. That's enough.

 

*BTW - Happy 101 Julliette Gordon Low!

[robsiew]

We don't have many co-ops in our area.  The one we do have is too expensive to put my 4 kids in.  We mostly haven't done co-ops though because I'm a control freak and like to be in control of everything.  If we would do a co-op that would take away from the time we have at home doing what I deem important.   There are homeschooling families I know who are so busy I wonder how they get anything done at home.  I guess we are the opposite.  We do everything at home, taking part in some choice activities within the community and at church. Just works for us... not for everyone!

[TKDmom]

I'm currently participating in 2 very different co-ops.

 

One of them is completely parent-run and geared towards elementary students. I've found that most homeschool parents don't have the time or energy or confidence to lead classes. If I want my children to participate in a class, I have almost always taught it. It's exhausting. It totally messes up my day, because I'm prepping for class, driving to class, then I spend the rest of my day laying on the couch recovering from class.  I liked that my kids cold participate in activities that can't be replicated at home, but I'm dropping the co-op now. Its just too much time and work for me.

 

Co-op #2 is designed for 7th-12th graders. It employs retired teachers and homeschool moms who are confident in a particular subject. It is mostly focused on academics. My dd is currently participating in classes that I cannot teach at home (drama and painting). It's lovely that I can drop her off for half the day while she does subjects that she loves. But... it STILL totally messes up my day. I spend 40 minutes (round trip) dropping her off in the middle of the morning (and again picking her up after lunch). That's the time of day when I can be most productive with teaching my boys. I can manage to help them with all their work even with the interruption, but it's a lot harder. She is thriving in this co-op. She's having such positive interactions with the older kids, spending some much-needed time away from siblings, and getting to do things that she loves. If she wasn't loving the co-op, I'd drop it.

 

I guess my main difficulty with co-ops it time/schedule. I just don't have enough time or energy to do all the good things that are out there.

 

[reign]

The co-op I wanted to join had a questionnaire to be filled out by a pastor. Questions about you're attendance, spirituality, and included a rating system. It was too awkward for me to ask mine to fill it out. We do have the girls in extras but not a ton. Mainly due to cost. My oldest isn't a fan of classes. She likes free time more. Dr. Jones (5) would take every class under the sun if I'd let her.

[Bearcat]

I echo what most everyone else has said.

 

When we first started homeschooling I really felt like I had to be in a co-op. I stressed about it a lot. I tried one but I was not the right kind of Christian and couldn't sign the statement of faith. Looked into another that I finally nixed because it was almost an hour away and it was costly. But i was panicking. I had to get my kids into a co-op. Started attending an all inclusive co-op that met once a week for field trip like activities. It was nice for awhile but I didn't feel like it was worth taking almost a whole day out of our schedule every week. We dropped out.

I realized I did not need a co-op after all. We were doing just fine. The thing about homeschooling is I like being at home.

And, frankly, I am glad I never got involved in an academic co-op. the reason we chose to homeschool is so that the academic stuff would happen, well, at home.

 

We are involved in a few extra-curricular type activities now. Cello, ballet, scouts etc. during the winter months I sign them up for art classes and every few months they attend free PE classes put on by the local parks district. My oldest is asking about the acting class at the community center. There is the occasional zoo class or class at the museum too. We do those kinds of things but no official co-op. I can pick what we sign up for and when we attend. If life is stressful we don't sign up for things. If we've got time and are interested, we sign up.

 

A lot of people I know are starting to homeschool so we are also starting to hang out with them more. Just had a Halloween party with about 30 homeschool kids. That was fun and I hope we do more activities like that, just not every week.

[Murphy101]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

Yes. All of the above at times.

[msjones]

I found co-ops to be mini versions of lousy public schools.  They had poorly trained and ineffective teachers, large class sizes, kids with behavior problems, too many required meetings where little was accomplished, and wasted class time.  

[HeartatHome]

No interest whatsoever. Maybe part of it is my personality but I just feel its not worth the time and energy quite honestly.

 

I like to be home and I need to be home. I get overwhelmed if there are too many outside things on the schedule. Things start to fall through the cracks like housework, decent meals, and even quality time with my kids because I'm too hurried or stressed. School also suffers so it would kind of defeat the purpose for me.

 

We have a routine but love the flexibility and would not want to lose that.

 

I don't home school for academic reasons so although important it is not my priority and I don't believe I have to join them in a coop (or every organized event) for them to have socialization.

 

I guess it comes down to priorities and a coop is just not one of them.

[T'smom]

How about an answer from someone who does do coops, but regrets it?

 

My oldest is in 1st this year and we decided to do Classical conversations this year. I wanted community, I wanted an academic environment, I wanted to get out ot the house. And I wanted fun science experiments/art projects that I didn't have to plan.

 

The reality has not lived up to my expectations. The material is not really age appropriate. When people say there is no context given for what you are memorizing, they are NOT exaggerating. So, in addition to losing most of Friday, I have to spend time the rest of the week giving context to things that don't make my list of important things for 1st grade. There is not much 'community', because everyone is busy running around getting stuff done. Nobody has time to chat. Supposedly, you have time to chat at the end during lunch and recess, but most of us have littles to attend to that keep us pretty busy. The science projects are only age appropriate half the time and the art projects are not that exciting either.

 

I might feel differently if my kids were all upper elementary, which seems to be what it is designed for....but as it stands, it's not helping us to reach our goals. I don't believe we will participate next year.

[Sherry in OH]

The coop’s statement of faith excludes us.  Even if we felt we could abide by it, we have no interest in YEC science.   

 

We would consider joining a purely social or enrichment group.  

[Pawz4me]

The co-ops here seemed very lame.  The social outings consisted of the kids who knew each other (usually ones who went to the same church) playing together and ignoring the other kids.  The other kids had nothing at all in common beyond being homeschooled, so it was difficult and awkward for them to find something in common.  The co-ops we tried purely for academic reasons were hugely disappointing.  On average the level was about two years behind what my boys were doing.

[Luckymama]

The co-ops here are not academically rigorous. If I wanted dd to sit in classes taught to the middle (or lower-middle, in some cases), I'd put her back into her old school.

 

She does plenty of extracurriculars, just none focused on homeschoolers.

[....]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

 

We don't do a co-op or homeschool group, either.

 

My kids don't really like other kids that much, so it becomes a waste of time.

I probably can't afford it and we also only have one car, so I have to be careful how I schedule things.

Stuff like that can really take away from the time you need to actually work with your kids.

Most of the homeschooling families we've met have only been homeschooling for a year or two and their kids are younger than mine.  We've only met one family with a high schooler in the last 5 years.

Almost all of the families we've met here are school-at-home type homeschoolers, so there isn't a lot of common ground there, either.

 

You don't have to join one of those groups if you don't think it's a good fit for your family! 

[Tess in the Burbs]

I look every year.  I think how cool it would be if I could find a group studying the same things that want to do the extra stuff together.  I put together a small group when we were in N VA.  I moved away 2 months into it :(  I haven't found anything where I am now that fits what I want.  

 

We tried a class....I did stay on site.  I didn't care for it.  One of my kids didn't care for it.  We all agreed it wasn't worth going early in the morning and making our other days heavier in school work.  

 

I am hosting girls for an art video right now.  I didn't charge, but may next time.  I could have done this on my own time in less time you know?  

 

And I hope to do lit discussions with a friend and her kids this winter.  It's still up in the air.  

So the co-op options I have now require me to teach too many classes.....I may as well stay home at teach, or it didn't mesh with our family, or it's too far away/costly.  

 

Luckily my kids agree and we like being home.  However, if I found the right group of friends to do some subjects with I would.  We don't want a glorified playgroup.  We want academic focused to bring discussions into our day.  I keep searching for the right people :-)

[Lizzie in Ma]

Around here, co-ops were glorified playgroups, no academics to speak of whatsoever.

I do not like teaching kids who don't care to learn, if I wanted to babysit, I would do so.

I don't like interrupting our schedule.

We attended one for a year when the kids were little, I despised it for all of the above reasons.

This year we've created an academic tutorial.  American Lit, Biology Lab and IEW which IS of great academic benefit and it is a paying gig.  Much more worth my time and effort and I know my kids are learning, working hard and getting academic credit for it.

 

[FriedClams]

I don't want to deal with anyone else's...schedule...or schedule changes...or kids...or discipline issues...or roaming toddlers...or curriculum...or sickness...or inapporpriately placed kids...or teaching...or academic standards...or class offerings...or pay for something I can do much better and easier at home...

 

We're not hermits. We do lots of things with other people. We do lots of extra curricular activities. I just don't do co-ops.

[Dmmetler]

 I've been involved with making a co-op happen (one where we pick a theme for the semester and parents take turn leading an activity for a week or two), and I'm guessing that it's coming to an end of it's usefulness for us. DD has enjoyed having the same group of kids regularly, and has developed a few friends from this group, but the kids are getting older and it's harder to find a topic that parents have the skills to teach at an appropriate level. It was much easier when we could take a year and read "The Magic School Bus" and do science together.

 

 

 

For the last two years, I've facilitated a group for kids interested in Mythology-each month, they each pick and present a topic to the group. So this Fall is Egyptian mythology, and so far they've presented the Gods/Goddesses, presented favorite stories, and next month, will turn it around and present it from the "villian's" viewpoint. I think this is very valuable-but one major reason why it is, is because it really is the kids choosing what they want to do next and the parents are just along for the ride, and it's ended up being a very nice social time for the kids AND parents as well, because it's tended to find the parents/kids who are more classically/academically focused and bring them together. I'm also doing a regular Latin class for just a few selected kids who enjoy Latin. I'm not an expert, either, but it gives them a chance to talk to each other in Latin, chant their declinations while jumping rope, and generally have fun.

[AuntPol]

We were in a social co-op that offered "classes" in 2 eight week semesters. It was okay but not perfect

-Good was it was 8 weeks a semester

-Social opportunity

 

Bad

-had to plan a course to teach

-had to teach kids that did not want to be there

-Sometimes no courses that my kids wanted to take but I was already obligated to teach

-Had to do Mom discussion time and that was repetitive after awhile and inevitably someone would say the two comments that would set me off (Homeschoolers are more godly and the worst day in homeschool is better than the best day in public school. GRRR)

-Statement of Faith required

-Had to pray with others (I don't like to pray out loud period)

-Classes sometimes were too religious (Kissed Dating Goodbye, TeenPact, various world view classes)

-Cliques were there but I was extroverted enough to mostly bypass. I got along individually but somedays were a bit harder than others.

-It was morning so the day was lost to academics as the schedule was off. I compensated by making those non-school days in my planning.

 

As far as the academic co-ops

-Major vetting processes to make sure you were godly enough beyond statement of faith

-All were Apologia based science and science eligious curriculums  

-They were not courses where the mom with a science background teachers science, etc. No it was moms with no more or less knowledge than I had teaching the course.

-History would be on a different year than we were

-In one, I would have had to teach a course for kids younger than my own because that was the slot. So I would have to have bought an entire curriculum and planned and taught and my child not got anything out of it (and I don't like little kids).

-None were rigorous

-Timing had conflicts, afternoons lost because of readjusting

-Often found them to be knee deep in drama, cliques, etc.

 

Outside classes

-Could not afford

-Apologia only for science (the one subject I really wanted to outsource)

-Time conflicts

-Long drive (1 hour each way) for anything remotely secular

[Ellie]

I forgot to say this:

 

We were "active" in our support group (support group, not "play group." I don't know when or why people started referring to support groups as "play groups." "Play group" sounds like what mothers of babies and toddlers go to, which isn't bad at all, you understand, it just isn't a "support group." But I digress... :D ). The first support group I was a member of was in 1983, and our primary activity was the park day (San Diego. We could do park day year-round.), and it was awesome. We were all inventing this thing called "homeschooling;" park day was fun for the children because they got to play with friends for a couple of hours; for us parents, it was a lifeline. Some days we were at the park until dinner time (we met at noon). Some of us bonded with each other and we'd get together at random times during the month. Eventually, someone joined us who thought we needed to be more organized at the park day...and that's a whole other store. :glare: I only did park day with the support group, because [insert long story] I couldn't redo my schedule to accommodate a field trip on a random day of the week (some of y'all might remember that my field trip day was Thursday). The year that we moved, someone started a 4-H club that met at the park, but I was pretty much out by then.

 

The next support group, of which I was eventually one of the leaders, kept things simple: Moms' Night Out once a month at someone's home; park day on the first Friday of the month, field trips on the second and fourth Fridays. Loved that support group. :001_wub: 

 

Over the next few years, homeschool sports days and gymnastics classes and two-day-a-week, on-campus classes, and more, began to pop up, all of them scheduled for mornings (or all day, in the case of the on-campus classes). I tried a gymnastics class...epic fail. We did choir for a couple of years...that was a good experience, but it met at noon, for an hour. And over the next 16 years I administered an umbrella-type school, and listened to the parents telling me about all of their co-op/outside class experiences, and I was thankful that I had not done those with my children. The stress level for most of those parents was way higher than I could have dealt with, and it would not have been a fair trade-off for me (it wasn't always a fair trade-off for them, either).

 

My daughters did ballet for a year; the Highland Scottish dance (younger dd for 9 years, older dd just for a couple); soccer twice; 4-H for several years; Camp Fire for several years; marching youth band for a couple of years; Missionettes and several musicals at church; AWANA and Pioneer Club (younger dd) for a year. All of these were with community groups, not just homeschoolers, and most meetings/practices/whatnot were in the late afternoon/early evening/weekends. I was able to keep my relaxed routine, at home, adjustable for my own children, keep my house clean, do the laundry and prepare meals that were ready when Mr. Ellie arrived home.

 

So that's my story and I'm sticking to it. :D  Balanced support group life/home life. Win-win.

[....]

 

-Major vetting processes to make sure you were godly enough beyond statement of faith

-All were Apologia based science and science eligious curriculums  

-They were not courses where the mom with a science background teachers science, etc. No it was moms with no more or less knowledge than I had teaching the course.

 

-None were rigorous

 

-Often found them to be knee deep in drama, cliques, etc.

 

 

Yeah, this is how the co-ops here are, too.  Most of the co-ops require a statement of faith and they're very homogenous.  Also, they appear rigorous on the outside (trying to tread very carefully here), but they're focusing on making the kids look like they know a lot, but they're not learning more important stuff - like problem-solving skills.  Our homeschool is very problem-solving/working through frustration/building/creating - oriented and the co-ops here are very focused on memorization and that's almost the polar opposite of what I'm doing with my kids.  Also, a number of our friends are in a co-op that told them they have to drop Singapore math (which is a great program) to use a math curriculum that I wouldn't personally use.  I don't understand why they would let anyone tell them what kind of math to use (especially when SM was working so well for their kids)!

 

Oh, well.  Sorry, not trying to be judgmental here.  :(    

[Peso]

We stopped due to many of the resons you listed, but I'd have to say the biggst one was the negative influence of the group - in particular the parents who ran the classes but couldn't do crowd control. Maybe it was just a wild and crazy year for that group, but it was awful for us.

 

The only group we enjoyed was a gentle Waldorf co-op when my girls were under 7 (and I am not a Waldorf person at all, to be honest, though I thought I was for a long time.... but that's another story altogether). Otherwise, every single one has been a disaster. The only bright spot is we did meet one or two other families that we enjoy being with, but we would have met them anyway :)

 

I hate co-ops. Can you tell? lol

 

Interesting survery!

[mommaduck]

ATM, it's because we live in the boondocks and we aren't the "right kind" of Christians to be included in the local groups. I would have to travel 30-60mins to be part of inclusive groups and this year, after having moved, it would just be too much. Maybe next year.

 

I was introduced to one homeschooling family this week and she showed extreme disinterest when I didn't homeschool through the group she did and mentioned that we were eclectic and were under an inclusive association. Here I was excited to meet another homeschooling family and it was made very obvious that I "didn't make the cut". Of course, around here, I can't cross myself before eating at Panera's without having a couple of old biddies suddenly change their conversation to loudly talking about a Catholic relative, how they told him that he needed to find a "bible based church", and how they visited his church and were bored.

[regentrude]

 

We were "active" in our support group (support group, not "play group." I don't know when or why people started referring to support groups as "play groups." "Play group" sounds like what mothers of babies and toddlers go to, which isn't bad at all, you understand, it just isn't a "support group."

 

But play was exactly what our group did: go to the park, kids play, moms chat. Under support group I would understand more structure, more educational activities, and actual homeschool *support* - not small talk where curriculum is taboo.

So, ours was definitely a PLAYgroup.

[Violet Crown]

I'm not taking any responsibility for this one, but when someone asked dh about co-op classes (for that all-important socialization), he said: "If I wanted my child taught by unqualified people, I'd put her in public school."

 

The nicer version of that is that we homeschool because that's the only affordable way to have a private tutor; we're just not interested in classroom-based education.

[bobbeym]

We only have 1 car and I need it to commute to work.

 

The one co-op within walking distance was too expensive for the little educational value DS would have gotten from it, and it seemed very unorganized as well.  As of a week before registration was due, they still hadn't settled on texts for the couple of classes I would have enrolled him in.  We decided not to bother, because I'd need more than a week to be able to comfortably evaluate the textbook and decide if it was one I think would fit well for us.

 

I don't think co-ops will ever be a good fit for us though because of DH's health. Even though he's improving, there's no guarantee that he'd be able to get up, get out, and function at a co-op each week even if he could get there.

[NotAVampireLvr]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

 

We are pretty rigorous with our curriculum and my MIL does a lot of science/math enrichment activities so I don't feel like we "need" the actual coop activities at this time.  My kids are also on the younger end so its hard to find things that interest all of them.

 

We tried out a few different homeschool groups until I found "the one".  It ended up being faith based and I like that we're all like-minded.  We get plenty of diversity during a weekly park days (when we get there) and our sports activities, so its nice to have ONE group where we are mostly doing the same thing.  Diversity is great, but its hard and I wanted our main social group to be easy.  Its more of a group  rather than a coop. We do have a theme each year and do one group class a month. For me its more of a social thing... this year its all medieval activities.  Its SO SO SO low key and I think that's exactly what we need. 

[msjones]

I don't want to deal with anyone else's...schedule...or schedule changes...or kids...or discipline issues...or roaming toddlers...or curriculum...or sickness...or inapporpriately placed kids...or teaching...or academic standards...or class offerings...or pay for something I can do much better and easier at home...

 

We're not hermits. We do lots of things with other people. We do lots of extra curricular activities. I just don't do co-ops.

This.  Yup.

[coffeegal]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

The outside classes I considered were run by friends and were academic. That wasn't an issue.

 

1. Cost - multiplied cost by 3 or 4 and we were priced out of our homeschool budget. I never asked about 'scholarships' because it was an unfair burden to place on friends.

 

2. Schedule - we have a wide range of children. I enjoy having a stable schedule that's designed for our age range. My preference is also for outside activities that are optional. The world doesn't end if we're having a bad day and I keep everyone home. Also, I don't handle a busy schedule well. The house gets messy and life becomes very difficult. The children operate on my timetable until high school when they're old enough to be in charge of their own schedule. My teens now range from one child who has church and 1 activity a month, to a child who has 3-4 social events a week and would love more.

 

3. My children weren't interested. They specifically informed me that they wanted outside activities to be social time, not more schoolwork. Why pick a battle that would just cause me more stress?

 

Everything added together meant I didn't, and don't, consider joining many outside classes or activities. After all, if momma ain't happy, nobody's happy, so make momma happy all the time. ;)

[Vida Winter]

We did co-ops as playtime/field trips when my kids were in early elementary but beyond that, no. At that time we lived near a city and we would get together to go ice-skating or to museums.  I generally dislike anything that takes me out of the house during the school day -- we get nothing useful done. Now we participate in a few activities in the evening or on the weekend.

[Ellie]

We did co-ops as playtime/field trips when my kids were in early elementary but beyond that, no. At that time we lived near a city and we would get together to go ice-skating or to museums.  I generally dislike anything that takes me out of the house during the school day -- we get nothing useful done. Now we participate in a few activities in the evening or on the weekend.

 

See, for me, that would have been support group activities, not co-op activities. :-)

[boscopup]

I pulled my son out of private school so he could work at his own pace. I don't think a co-op would be a good fit, academically, just like private school wasn't a good fit. There really isn't any difference in my mind.

 

I homeschool. Homeschooling works best for me if we're actually at home (my kids cannot focus if we try to school outside the home - if we go somewhere, they'd rather PLAY). I don't want to lose a whole day to a co-op, especially if it won't be beneficial academically.

 

I currently don't have any academic subjects that require outside help. My oldest is 4th grade. I can handle the subjects he's doing. When I do need to outsource, I'll look to the local community college and/or university.

 

I'm a control-freak. I want complete control over our curriculum. Some co-ops would take away our ability to use something else (due to time, etc.). If the co-op uses IEW and I want to use WWS, my kid isn't going to be able to handle both. I also like to be flexible enough to change curriculum on a whim.

 

My kids are already in outside activities - Bible class at church, hockey, scouting, etc. They get plenty of "socialization" with other kids and know how to behave in a group/class situation.

 

Most co-ops around here are either "fluff" co-ops or way more rigorous than I want to put effort into (ie, hours of homework for me to deal with at home, which takes even more time away from what *I* wanted to teach at home).

 

I do have a support group that does field trips, park days, and parties. I try to do something with them once every month or two. Again though, it completely kills our homeschool day when we have something with them.

[My3girls]

We do not co-op, because I work.  I wouldn't mind using one for art and music, but that would be about it.  We do Girl Scouts and 1 other extra curricular.  We are wrapping up cross country, right now and hope to start art for the youngers and archery for dd12 after Christmas.  We limit it because of time and money.  DH works out of town so there is only me to chauffer.  Try as I might I still have not found a way to be in 2 places at once. lol

[PeacefulChaos]

Hi! I'm curious about the reasoning that homeschool parents who have considered enrolling their child/children in a coop or many curricular activities.

Is it becuase...

You want the focus to be more on academics and coops are just social?

Your children aren't interested?

It is too expensive?

The schedule diesn't work?

The environment/other kids are not a positive influence on you or your children?

There aren't any available in your area?

You din't have enough time?

 

I'm just curious. I love the idea of homeschool coops, but they usually seem to require a lot from the parents- even if they don't have to volunteer, they have to be present. I have also seen coops that are mostly social. Being social is fine, but I prefer an academic environment. I just can't find anyone else who agrees...

 

We've never done a coop for a few reasons -

-there is a lot expected of me (teaching a class) at times, and I honestly have no interest in teaching other people's children.  I'm not a kid person, and don't know what i would do with them if I had to do it. 

-what they are studying doesn't line up with what we're doing already.  There's a local coop that is doing Mystery of History, I think - we already do SOTW and are on the 3rd year.  Idk how MOH is set up or what year they are doing, but I'd already bought and planned all our stuff, I'm not going to change it now.

-realistically, I don't like the idea of making it to coop every week.  As it is, we have enough to juggle, and I don't like the idea of one more thing.  If it was something that they were really going to be learning from, I'd do it.  But this?  Nah...

-some of the local coops are uber-religious.  While that isn't something I necessarily have a problem with, sometimes I can't help but wonder why, for a party, they require a Bible for the scavenger hunt.  :confused:  Can't you have just a regular scavenger hunt?  Does EVERY last party, event, etc, have to have a biblical component?  I'm a Christian myself, but I don't see the need for that much religious nuttiness (sorry, not trying to offend!!!) 

-lastly, I usually don't find out about them at convenient times.  The first one I looked into, I found out about in the spring, but once I read all that was required of me I decided not to go check it out.  The second, I was called and told that since they'd already accepted 3 new families this year, and they like a small coop, it was already going to throw off the balance and could they try to call me next year, maybe?  (That one was extracurriculars only, which would be what I would prefer - leave the academics to me, especially since we tend toward a classical education when others in our area do NOT.)  The last one I didn't even hear about until about a month or so into the school year.  :001_huh:  But they didn't have anything we were interested in, anyway.

[Brooketopia]

I've done the whole co-op and lots of extracurriculars thing, and it just doesn't fulfill my reasons for homeschooling.  I homeschool for the rigorous academics, and I need to be at home, teaching my kids, in order for that rigor to happen.

 

Co-op and Park Day take up too much time--getting kids ready, travelling, being there, travelling home, getting the kids back on schedule (which rarely happens because I'm absolutely exhausted from having to keep track of four kids out of thirty in an unfamiliar environment).

 

I go to a lot of effort to draw up lesson plans that provide plenty of good reading choices, experiences, and activities.  When I join up with a group, I find that my lesson plan has to be pushed to the side in order to accommodate the group, and the group has never risen to the level of my lesson plan.

 

I am a freakishly stressed-out woman on co-op or park days because we're trying to get everything done before we go.  Why push the kids to finish up quickly to go to something that isn't as good as what they'd be missing at home, and I somewhat dread?

 

To be clear:  The women in the co-op/Park Day--I love 'em.  They are excellent women who take homeschooling and motherhood seriously and I admire how they run their families.  I think I only stuck with the group for so long because I like the women so much.  But the group takes away more than it provides, in the long run.  It's just getting to the point where I have to choose "better" over "good"--and my lesson plan is better, despite how good our co-op can be.  Each one of us homeschools for slightly different reasons, and I've yet to find another homeschooler in my area who is as focused on rigor and depth of academics as I am.  I've actually been teased a fair amount for how much I expect of my kids, and some people think I'm flat-out killing off their "love of learning" because I insist on worksheets being completed and sloppy work re-done.  I don't need that in my life.  And, oh my goodness, I cannot handle another conversation about gluten-free, sugar-free or dairy-free lifestyles.  I like McDonald's and I am at peace with the pleasure I get out of eating salty french fries.

 

As far as extra-curriculars, they fall into the same vein of thought--if they're not offering something better than I already have planned, we don't need 'em.  I provide athletic opportunities, I teach art, we do crafts.  I do farm out the piano lessons because I do not want to teach them.  No need to torture myself.  My kids have friends, we have church, I have my Knit Group...we have a full life, no need to add more.

[HS Mom in NC]

Like anything else, there are pros and cons and a time and a place for everything.

 

Co-op Pros

 

Great when well planned, well organized and well done. 
Great for parents who don't want to teach a specific subject and can pay another parent who teaches it well.

Great for parents who want to be responsible for some, but not all of subject by rotating responsibilities between themselves.

Great when the worldview, materials, sub-culture and content match up with the parents' educational philosophies and students' ability range.

Great for the right mix of parents and students.

Great when you can afford the time and/or money.

 

Co-op Cons

 

A hassle when they're not well planned, well organized and well done.

A hassle for parents who don't want to teach but also don't want to pay someone else to.

A hassle when "being responsible" for something means different things to the different people involved.

A hassle when the worldviews, materials, sub-culture and content don't match up with the parents' educational philosophies and students' ability range.

A hassle when it's the wrong mix of parents and students.

A hassle if you can't afford the time and/or money.

 

Co-op killers

 

Being unclear about the purpose, focus and behavioral expectations of the co-op itself.

Being unclear about the scope and sequence, materials and assignments of the co-op before people sign up.

Being unclear about the expectations of the parents and students participating in the co-op.

Assuming everyone has the same motives, priorities, sub-cultural norms and social standards in the co-op.

Failing to start and end on time.

Failing to have a back up plan for urgent or emergency interruptions when it's your turn to teach/lead.

Poor communication before the co-op starts and during the course of the co-op.

Drama mammas who are thin skinned, assume the worst, blow things out of proportion, play the victim or martyr whenever possible.

Parents who want a customized-to-my-individual-children approach to a group situation.

Parents who don't supervise very well the children too young to participate.

Parents who always take but never contribute.

Running a co-op by either bending over backwards to please everyone or being so rigid that no one has any input ever.

A facility that just doesn't suit the number of people or the activities.

People who want to do academics at a social co-op.

People who want to socialize at an academic co-op.

 

My Personal Experiences

 

I've homeschooled in one of the largest homeschooling communities for 13 years now.  I've done some co-ops.  Most are not worth the hassle.

 

The best true co-op I ever participated in was The American Girl Book Club for about 8 months. It was a 20-30 minute drive from my house.  There was one planning session at the home of the woman who organized it and handled the communications.   If you didn't show up for the planning session, you didn't have a say in how it was planned.  Once a month it was a different American Girl and everyone read at least her first book.

 

Every parent  there had to volunteer to do one of the following:

 

 1. Lead the book discussion (be prepared to cover book 1 in depth for your American Girl for all the girls and a general discussion of the other books for your American Girl that only some kids would read.)

 

2. Post a list of supplies each parent needed to bring for the craft or demonstration you taught directly related to the book the week before it was your turn to lead.

 

3. Plan and lead a game directly related to your American Girl book.

 

4.  Plan to bring a snack directly related to your American Girl book.

 

There were just over 30 families that participated.  The elementary aged students did all the activities related to the books.  The kids too old, too small or too male played outside and just had the snacks with the participants. 

 

A friend of mine who was teaching a different month than me called me 3 hours before I had to leave for the American Girl Club she was supposed to teach and explained her son had just broken his arm and she needed me to take over.  I threw together a simple mind map (or web diagram) of how basic economics works using a house and why when the Depression hit, one business going under affected others. (Option #2)

 

My month I led the book discussion for my American Girl and led the embroidery craft because no one else there had any experience with it.

 

Another one well worth the money was a co-op lead by a veteran homeschooling mom who had a college English professor before she had kids.  She led one for high school kids (3 years of Latin was required to get in) and ran it just like a college classroom with college level standards.  It was a great "college sampler" experience for them.  Several people said it was one of the best they'd ever been to.  We didn't participate because of age and we don't do Latin. I don't know what the cost was.

 

We hire an art teacher for Art Class with Larry on the 2nd, 4th and 5th Tuesdays. It's a 6 minute drive from my house. I'd drive 30+ minutes for it if I had to.  It's outstanding because they do everything: silk screening, making paper, bronze casting, riku firing, charcoal drawings, watercolor paintings, colored chalks, pouring silver to make pendants, making beads from powdered glass, Project Linus quilts, kite making,  etc. 

 

At $10 per kid per class is well worth the money. He brings most of the supplies most of the time. We've had to buy a t-shirt, a roll of kite string and an extra $5 for the lump of silver the kid made into a pendant. We pay him, he does things his own unique way and we love him for it.  He doesn't start or end on time because he has many classes all over the PHX area and always finishes a class before going to the next.  Sometimes it's 2-3 hours depending on the project between long it took him to show up and how long the project took. We plan accordingly.  The moms and kids are a good mix and the host's home is rural so the kids can play outside or on one side of the house in a large play room while the moms visits while waiting for the teacher.

 

My oldest took Art Class with Larry for 10 years.  In her college Art History Class she is the only student who's done every technique listed so far.  Ancient Egyptians made a kind of paper with what was near by.  Larry taught them to make paper out of cactus pulp, sunflowers and cotton-including a watermark.  The Japanese did Riku firing.  Larry did Riku firing with them....and on and on. Larry is the best deal in town.

[Mommy22alyns]

We did a co-op for a few years, but stopped because it got more expensive, Rebecca moved to a more expensive and time-consuming competitive gym, and it was really just for fun anyway.  We do just fine without it.  The girls have select activities, but again, not a lot due to the nature of competitive gymnastics.

[Ellie]

 

We hire an art teacher for Art Class with Larry on the 2nd, 4th and 5th Tuesdays. It's a 6 minute drive from my house. I'd drive 30+ minutes for it if I had to.  It's outstanding because they do everything: silk screening, making paper, bronze casting, riku firing, charcoal drawings, watercolor paintings, colored chalks, pouring silver to make pendants, making beads from powdered glass, Project Linus quilts, kite making,  etc. 

 

At $10 per kid per class is well worth the money. He brings most of the supplies most of the time. We've had to buy a t-shirt, a roll of kite string and an extra $5 for the lump of silver the kid made into a pendant. We pay him, he does things his own unique way and we love him for it.  He doesn't start or end on time because he has many classes all over the PHX area and always finishes a class before going to the next.  Sometimes it's 2-3 hours depending on the project between long it took him to show up and how long the project took. We plan accordingly.  The moms and kids are a good mix and the host's home is rural so the kids can play outside or on one side of the house in a large play room while the moms visits while waiting for the teacher.

 

My oldest took Art Class with Larry for 10 years.  In her college Art History Class she is the only student who's done every technique listed so far.  Ancient Egyptians made a kind of paper with what was near by.  Larry taught them to make paper out of cactus pulp, sunflowers and cotton-including a watermark.  The Japanese did Riku firing.  Larry did Riku firing with them....and on and on. Larry is the best deal in town.

 

I might consider an Art Class with Larry. :-)

 

[Amy Jo]

Vehicles (sometimes DH has my truck) and gas expense -- I try not to use too much fuel.

 

I don't like being gone in the middle of the day. I'm not good at remembering appointments or scheduled events.

 

I got tired of organized kids activities. Honestly I'd rather take them to the park and just let them play. We'd go places and they never got a chance to just talk to another kid casually. Heaven forbid they make a friend!

 

We are trying to structure our lives to allow us to camp/travel for a few months every winter. Most things don't run in the summer, so it just doesn't seem worth it for a few months in the fall and maybe a couple more in the spring.