Article: Parents Spend too Much Time at School...thoughts?

[CyndiLJ]

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2013/09/ptas_and_bake_sales_why_volunteering_at_your_kid_s_school_does_not_make.html

 

So Hive, what are your thoughts?  Having done both brick and mortar as well as homeschooling, I found that there were few parents engaged in actual learning activities with their kids, but plenty willing to raise money and be involved in other ways, whcih was good but perhaps not as effective.  I actually volunteered 2-3 times a week at our sons' school, helping with writing and reading.  Never saw another parent there for that sort of active, engaged volunteering.  At some point I began to realize that I could do the same thing at home with just my kids, and we wouldn't have the distraction of other kids.  It was a gradual change in my thinking.

 

What do you think?

[Arcadia]

Here parents are active in fundraising and sports.  The next door school raised $10k before school started and at least $20k within the first few weeks of school for PTA fund. Classroom volunteering is very little because most have youngers at home and no free babysitter,  or their youngest is in school and they went back to work.

My hubby took annual leave for every field trip so that I could chaperone for my older boy's public school field trip. If he could not take leave, I would not have been able to chaperone.   I would have volunteered when my younger entered kindergarten but school district politics made us decide to go the virtual academy route.

I do live in an area that does a lot of after schooling so I would say they are involved in their kids education, just not in the classroom.

[Χά�ων]

 

In a 2009 study of parenting in 13 countries and regions, parents who volunteered in school extracurricular activities had children who performed worse in reading, on average, than parents who did not volunteer—even after controlling for children’s backgrounds. Out of 13 very different places, there were only two (Denmark and New Zealand) in which parental volunteering had any positive effect on reading, and it was small.

Huh. though she makes it sound like involved parents are the cause. I wonder if it is the reverse. Child struggle with reading and the parent is concerned and wants to show support for the child and teacher so volunteers.

 

My son is severely dyslexic, if he were in PS I would probably be more inclined to volunteer than if there was no issue and everything was running smoothly.

 

She does go on to acknowledge that but I am just not impressed with her style.

[jennynd]

My kids were In private school, they RELY on parents volunteer. It was even frown upon if you do not actively involved. ... And I was not involved in ANY volunteer. I work full time and after school my kids who also have lots of after school activities. I never really see a point to volunteer in school nor fund raiser. I paid the tuition, they should have enough people to cover the classroom as well as school supply.

[MeghanL]

"American parents show up at their children’s schools. A lot. Nearly nine out of 10 attended at least one PTA or other school meeting in the 2011–12 school year, according to data released last week by the Department of Education’s National Household Education Surveys Program. "

 

So, attending 1 PTA meeting in a year is considering being at your child's school a lot? I have to disagree with the author's definitions of "a lot" and "volunteer".

 

[Χά�ων]

Sadly, in my small town fundraisers are mandatory. Your kid doesn't meet the minimum you are sent a bill. I think it is disgusting. Though I will admit that if the schools in this town do nothing else, the kids can read. The people here have very high expectations and really support the schools.

[My3girls]

I think a lot of parents work and are unable to volunteer at school during the day.  I was unable to because even though I work from home, I still work.  I helped my children with the homework given  but did not make up extra assignments.  I thought it was unfair to spend 7 hours at school then do homework and then do more work on top.  They needed time to play outside.  When the school system failed for us, I took them out, and I school them at home.   Even though my time is limited because of work responsibilites, they are still getting more than they got in ps. 

 

My kids are having a time adjusting to the amount of reading they are now expected to do and the amount of one on one time they are given.  They are used to a lecture and then a worksheet they do by themselves and then go over as a group later.  To me this looked a lot like regurgitation and fill in the blank with someone else's answer, if you didn't get it.  They are soooo quick to say I don't know and so frustrated when I step them through making them think of the answers themselves.  I can already see a huge difference in their abilities, though, so hopefully, they will adjust sooner than later.

[Mom0012]

I think a lot of parents see their children's education as the responsibility of the school.  I know when I was growing up, while I had wonderful parents, they were very hands-off with me about my schoolwork.  I don't ever remember them helping me.  I look at my sister, who has two boys who struggle tremendously, and she has griped for years about the school not giving them adequate services, but it has never occurred to her that she could actually work with her kids and help them improve.  She'd rather make cupcakes.  Now, she is a special ed teacher and complains about how none of the parents are involved and they expect the school to do more than is humanly possible.  I know there are parents who do work with their kids on academics, but I think there is a mindset among many that the school will take care of their children's education.  I mean, that's their job, right? (said tongue in cheek)

[Mom0012]

dp

[amsunshine]

I think it's amusing to read this article by Ripley after Allison Benedikt's article that appeared in Slate last week (the one about making the "bad" parenting decision to send kids to private school).

[Bootsie]

My kids attended a PS where there was a lot of parent involvement.  The involvement was not just in fund raising but in every aspect of the school.  My kids actually thought the parents of some of their friends were employed by the school.  In fact, I think there were some parents that put in more hours, time, and effort than some of the actual school employees.  I am a strong believer in parents being involved in and concerned about their children's education.  But, there were drawbacks of so much parental involvement.  Some parents were put in situations about knowing more than they should have about other children but they were not held accountable to any privacy laws or ethical standards as they would have been as an employee.  These tended to be the same parents who would gossip around town about other children.  

 

Parents were also encouraged to come have lunch with their children.  Parents were allowed to take their child outside to a special area to eat and their child could invite a friend.  At times I was uncomfortable with my child having so much contact with another parent--I had no idea what adults my child was interacting with until after the fact.

[JennyD]

I liked this, from the comments section after the article:
 

Speaking as someone who doesn't have children, it seems that parents can't catch a break. They are too involved with their children's school activities, or not involved enough. They push their kids too hard, or don't offer them any guidance at all. If you send your kid to public school, you don't care about their education. If you send them to private school, you are elitist and not doing your part to help public schools. If you're a working mother, you don't care about your kids, if you stay at home you are lazy. Seems like it would be pretty frustrating.

[mamaraby]

I liked this, from the comments section after the article:

 

Speaking as someone who doesn't have children, it seems that parents can't catch a break. They are too involved with their children's school activities, or not involved enough. They push their kids too hard, or don't offer them any guidance at all. If you send your kid to public school, you don't care about their education. If you send them to private school, you are elitist and not doing your part to help public schools. If you're a working mother, you don't care about your kids, if you stay at home you are lazy. Seems like it would be pretty frustrating.

I was actually thinking something along these lines. On the one hand I am failing my community and school district because I homeschool whereas the accepted wisdom seems to be that my better bet is to enroll my kids in school and the be actively involved in schools and helping to advocate for change on the inside. On the other hand, by doing so I'm spending too much time at school and ensuring that my children have lower reading scores.

 

I think I'll just keep homeschooling instead. :)

[AuntPol]

When my kids went to public elementary, the parents who volunteered had the more advanced kids. I don't think it was the volunteering that made them advanced but just the types of families they were (The value education as well as socio-economic status).

 

My kids are back in school (one in public middle and the other in a charter high school). I don't have an idea of the volunteer levels/performance correlation because I don't know a lot of the parents or kids yet. I was probably most involved parent in getting the school ready to be opened and volunteering in the school now. My daughter is doing well academically. My son is also doing well academically and I've not volunteered at his school at all.

 

However with both, I make sure they complete their homework and give it a glance to make sure there are no glaring errors, help them figure out their time management for the evening/week, email the teacher if something is not clear (for the middle schooler -the high schooler sends her own emails). When I noticed my daughter was making a consistent mistake in her math homework, I found resources to help her practice the concept. I have the house stocked with good resources. I make sure they get sleep, eat healthy, etc. Most of all, I listen to them about their day and engage them in what they are learning (academically and socially).

[Pawz4me]

When my kids went to public elementary, the parents who volunteered had the more advanced kids. I don't think it was the volunteering that made them advanced but just the types of families they were (The value education as well as socio-economic status).

 

The same was true of the elementary school my sons attended.

[mamajag]

My thoughts are that this is another in the series of blame the parents articles that look to shift the blame to anything and anyone who is not fundamentally responsible for the education of children in this country.  One article blames parents who aren't involved, and then another comes up with parents who are too involved. Quite honestly, it's tiring and pathetic.

[mommymilkies]

When dd went to school, they had a huge amount of required volunteer time during school hours.  It was utterly impossible since I had small children at home and no family around for a 20+ hour drive.  I can't imagine having to take off work for it, too.  I can see *asking* for help at school, and I was involved with my child's education, but I highly doubt my required hours helping hand out snacks, watch at PE, and cut out little paper doohickies in the classroom really made a difference whatsoever. 

[Chris in VA]

I have a somewhat different perspective--prob not a healthy one.

 

I am the world's worst public school parent. I used to volunteer, but I don't anymore. I send my husband to BTS Night (I do have to go this year, tho, b/c he's got to work). I don't do any fundraising that involves selling stuff. 

 

My child does very well. I do stay on top of homework, as far as making sure she does it and providing a place and materials to complete it, but she doesn't want me to check it. I feed her well, send her to bed at 9pm, ask her about her day, and meet her teachers. I respond to emails, 

 

That's it.

 

I'm not a PTA member because I disagree with their stance on homeschooling. I don't belong to any of the "boosters." I don't sell snacks at games. I don't volunteer for the one field trip a year. 

 

Am I involved? Sorta. Do I think it's my job to support the school by fundraising, tutoring, or monitoring the behaviour of other students. 

 

NO. 

 

I feel rather rebellious and pissy about that, to be honest. I think schools would have enough money if they didn't bow to the Textbook Gods, if they didn't feel obligated to provide daycare, and if they didn't pay their superintendents millions of dollars. I think more parents should read to their kids, educate themselves so they can help their kids at home, and teach their kids to behave. The schools want to parent my kid by getting parents to come to the SCHOOL and be PARENTS? What's wrong with this picture? Do your damn job, both of you--schools and parents.

 

Sorry, but that's how I feel. 

[In The Great White North]

 

 

I'm pretty sure any teacher would take a parent who checks their kids homework and reads to them over the fundraising parent. 

Probably not the teacher from the other thread who wouldn't let the homework go home.

[Library Momma]

Where I live there is an enormous level of parent involvement through about 5th grade.  There are waiting lists to chaperone field trips and parents do everything from help sort books, to make photocopies.  I work from home but  use my lunch once a week to volunteer in the library where I check in books, clean them and then put them back on the shelves.  This allows the librarian to concentrate on teaching her lessons.  A big no-no however is allowing parents to work academically with kids.  I was shocked the first time on saw on this forum that volunteers would lead reading groups in some schools.  That would never happen here -parents would flip out.

 

Fundraising here is interesting.  There are numerous fundraisers throughout the year and people pick and choose which ones they want to participate in, if any.  I don't have my kids sell anything either, but they buy plenty of books at the book fair.  I can't imagine anyone participating in every single one  -That would be overwhelming and expensive.

[VeteranMom]

My kids attended a charter school until the end of 2nd grade. Initially, I volunteered for the "room mother" and "party coordinator" positions.  I quickly realized that was not where I wanted to volunteer my time- I eventually ended up helping in reading and math groups weekly.  The parents went way overboard with the party celebrations.  A plate of cookies and something to drink at a party was never enough.  A full course meal with all the trimmings was the norm.  Games and crafts required the party coordinator spend her own money and time planning something special.  The room mother's job was figuring out what gifts to get the teachers at Christmas and to organize the festivities during Teacher's appreciation week (yes, a full week of gifts and celebration that involved catered meals, flowers, monetary gifts, etc).  The parents were all terribly involved in the "fluff" activities and loved to raise and spend money, but few assisted with weekly reading or math groups.  There were usually 4 moms/class who would come in and help with the academics. 

     

[Pawz4me]

I talked with a mom at dance some years ago who was told by a teacher they didn't want parents volunteering in the classrooms (when she offered).  The teacher told her if she wanted to help she should fund raise.

 

nice...

 

At my boys' elementary school I had several teachers tell me that they had to be rather selective about the parents who volunteered in the classroom.  Apparently some kids go rather ballistic when mom (or dad) are in class with them, to the point of causing a total disruption.  And there is a range when it comes to how teachers feel about classroom volunteers. At each end of the spectrum I encountered  were one teacher who didn't want any parent volunteers in the classroom ever to a teacher who tried to arrange for a parent volunteer to always be in the room.

[warneral]

My own volunteering (in the classroom) was the precipice for me pulling my kids out of school!  Seeing the behavior and chaos helped me realize that they weren't sitting in an "ideal" environment like I had previously thought.

 

I think parent involvement is helpful in whatever form it plays.  I agree with the general idea that parental involvement in ACADEMICS (versus raising money) will play a larger roll in the success of the students (and therefore the school).  So the parents at home working to help their children be responsible, helping identify issues, etc are probably playing a bigger role in school success than the parents working on the PTA to help raise money for smartboards (my PTA experience).

[Sobeknofret]

My kids were In private school, they RELY on parents volunteer. It was even frown upon if you do not actively involved. ... And I was not involved in ANY volunteer. I work full time and after school my kids who also have lots of after school activities. I never really see a point to volunteer in school nor fund raiser. I paid the tuition, they should have enough people to cover the classroom as well as school supply.

 

This was part of the reason that we pulled our son out of his private school. There were other reasons as well, but this was a big one.

[The Way of My People]

This is DS's first year of PS. One page of his registration packet was a form we were to sign committing to volunteer at least two hours each month. When I asked at Back to School Night about volunteering in the classroom, DS's teacher told me she doesn't like parent volunteers in the classroom and we should stick to fundraising. I am NOT going to fundraise. I tore the form out of the registration packet and threw it away. I haven't heard anything about it yet, but we'll see if it comes up during parent teacher conferences.

 

DH and I spend most of our free time exploring and learning with our kids. We read to them every night. We check their homework, and practice spelling words nightly. We do daily music practice. We read for pleasure as a family and make weekly trips to the library. I find it preposterous that anyone would suggest we are failing to participate in our sons' educations just because we don't organize teacher appreciation breakfasts or sell raffle tickets.

[Spy Car]

We are blessed to be at a school with high parental involvement at every level, and based on that—and a knowledge of other local schools with high parental involvement—I gotta say, I think the author is DEAD WRONG.

 

WRONG. WRONG. WRONG.

 

Bill

[mom2scouts]

I talked with a mom at dance some years ago who was told by a teacher they didn't want parents volunteering in the classrooms (when she offered).  The teacher told her if she wanted to help she should fund raise.

 

nice...

 

This sounds so much like our local schools.  They claim they want parental involvement, but that means you should leave all the academics up to the "experts" and spend your time raising money for the extra stuff they want, selling stuff to the students, and putting on big "teacher appreciation" luncheons.  I tried so hard to be a good PS parent, but I usually only lasted a few weeks in the glorified fundraising organization (PTA).

[msjones]

We are blessed to be at a school with high parental involvement at every level, and based on that—and a knowledge of other local schools with high parental involvement—I gotta say, I think the author is DEAD WRONG.

 

WRONG. WRONG. WRONG.

 

Bill

 

Bill,

 

From our last interaction here at the WTM site I know that your children attend a highly functional school with lots of high-functioning parents.  A lovely scenario, indeed.  

 

There are other scenarios...

 

When I was teaching I had some of the most horrendous parent volunteers.  They wanted to "help" in my classroom.

 

All but one of them (and she was a gem -- I'll never forget her) caused more problems than they solved.

 

 Parents wanted to be friends with the students.  

They would chat with the kids while I was teaching.

 They would tell the kids the answers and giggle about it.

 They would take sides in the students' squabbles.

 They used obscene language.

 One dad told a kid how to cheat by writing notes on his arm.

They would answer their phones and have conversations in my classroom.

They would bring their babies and toddlers and set them loose.

 One mom interrupted me in the middle of a health lesson and started yelling (yes!) that I was lying to the kids by telling them that cigarettes have some ingredients that are poisonous and addictive.

 And the very worst and most common of all: they would figure out who was struggling behaviorally or academically and would gossip about those children to the other parents!!!!  

 

I quit having parents in my classroom.  No regrets. No apologies.

 

Bill, I'm glad things are different at your kids' school.  Sounds nice.

[PeacefulChaos]

This seems opposite to what people (at least around here) say.  That parents don't care.  They don't get involved.  The reasons schools fail is because of parents not paying attention to their children's education.

 

Same here.

Hardly anyone shows up even at PT conferences.  My teacher friends would tell me that usually, the parents who showed up were the ones they didn't need to talk to as much... they were still happy to, but usually the ones who show up here are the ones whose kids are doing pretty well, don't have any discipline problems, etc.  The ones the teachers would really like to talk to about their children, don't ever show.  :(

[MomtoCandJ]

I volunteer a few hours a month as a lunch/recess aid. The play ground is kind if broken up into two parts with lots if bushes and whatnot so the school likes a few parent volunteers out there to help monitor the location of the kids and to let potential creepers know that the children are well watched.

[MomtoCandJ]

I volunteer a few hours a month as a lunch/recess aid. The play ground is kind if broken up into two parts with lots if bushes and whatnot so the school likes a few parent volunteers out there to help monitor the location of the kids and to let potential creepers know that the children are well watched.

[Miss Mousie]

Where I live there is an enormous level of parent involvement through about 5th grade.  There are waiting lists to chaperone field trips and parents do everything from help sort books, to make photocopies.  I work from home but  use my lunch once a week to volunteer in the library where I check in books, clean them and then put them back on the shelves.  This allows the librarian to concentrate on teaching her lessons.  A big no-no however is allowing parents to work academically with kids.  I was shocked the first time on saw on this forum that volunteers would lead reading groups in some schools.  That would never happen here -parents would flip out.

 

Fundraising here is interesting.  There are numerous fundraisers throughout the year and people pick and choose which ones they want to participate in, if any.  I don't have my kids sell anything either, but they buy plenty of books at the book fair.  I can't imagine anyone participating in every single one  -That would be overwhelming and expensive.

 

 

The bolded would never happen here, either, but not because the parents would flip out.  Rather, it would be the "experts" protecting their territory (and thus their justification for 4% annual raises).

 

To be fair, though, given msjones's post enumerating volunteering disasters, I suppose a teacher has no way of knowing up front which parents would be capable and conscientious, and therefore would prefer to exclude everyone rather than have to "fire" a parent volunteer who does a poor job.

 

[Library Momma]

The bolded would never happen here, either, but not because the parents would flip out.  Rather, it would be the "experts" protecting their territory (and thus their justification for 4% annual raises).

 

To be fair, though, given msjones's post enumerating volunteering disasters, I suppose a teacher has no way of knowing up front which parents would be capable and conscientious, and therefore would prefer to exclude everyone rather than have to "fire" a parent volunteer who does a poor job.

 

 

I'm saying that parents would flip out because they want those "experts."  Aside from the confidentiality aspect (which is a huge issue in itself), the teacher and perhaps paraprofessionals, have a responsibility to evaluate all of the students, maintain the levels of differentiation, and be on the lookout for signs of a learning delay or disability.  I don't know one person who would be ok with that being left up to a random parent.   There are plenty of volunteer opportunities for parents that allow teachers more time to concentrate on the academic responsibilities.  If a teacher does not want a parent in their classroom during academic instruction then it up to the teacher to schedule volunteers (if they choose to use them) appropriately.  Volunteering disasters should never be allowed to happen in the first place.

[SKL]

I used to do a lot of volunteering in schools before I had kids.  Honestly, I think that's the logical time to do it - you have more time and less stress at that season of life, and nobody can claim "playing favorites."  There are also many retirees who are literacy volunteers.

 

Last year, when Miss A was having some problems getting focused on school, I asked her 1st grade teacher whether it would be helpful for me to come in with her in the morning and help her get settled and focused on her "morning work."  ("Morning work" is what they were supposed to do before actual teaching started.  It was not graded work, but they were kept from recess etc. if they did not finish it.)

 

Teacher tensed up and said she really discourages parents from coming into the classroom.

 

However, some of the "good parents" were welcomed to be volunteers in the classroom (helping with things like AR testing and library time).  Needless to say, their kids were 4.0 students....

[SKL]

As for fundraising, I refuse to do it.  The other day my kid brought home a huge fundraising packet (selling coupon books) and I sent them right back the next day.  I am not going to hit up the people I know to buy stuff they don't want or need or can't afford.  Blah.

 

The way my school (private) does fundraisers is that they let you reduce the cost of your kids' tuition or class trip by doing this stuff.  They have a whole list of ways you can do this.  That's nice if it helps some people, but I don't have time for that.  I will pay full price, now leave me alone.  I'm busy teaching my kid the math and grammar that her 1st grade teacher didn't teach.

[CyndiLJ]

My own volunteering (in the classroom) was the precipice for me pulling my kids out of school!  Seeing the behavior and chaos helped me realize that they weren't sitting in an "ideal" environment like I had previously thought.

 

 

 

You know, I don't think I realized it until I read this...but I think this was the case for me as well.  I actually liked all the teachers we encountered, but I guess I just thought there was a better way, at least for our kids.   A lot of things and encounters converged to cause us to homeschool, but part of it really was being in the classroom, seeing what was being missed, what could be done better in a one on one situation, etc.

 

Part of it though was that I grew a teensy bit rebellious! Haha!  Little by little I saw my role as parent being taken over by the school...being told I couldn't take my kids out for a day anytime I wanted rankled.  Having the school send home a note about my sons BMI really, really ticked me off.  Having pressure put on us for homework that was truly busy work and unproductive (I would have fully supported work that had a point to it).  So many little things began to get under my skin.  I am glad it did, our life is indeed very different now, but in so many wonderful ways!

[TraceyS/FL]

When my kids were in PS I filled out their form to be able to volunteer, which involved a background check.

 

I wanted to help in my KIDS classroom. Instead, the volunteer coordinator called to schedule me for days and times WEEKLY with a teacher I didn't know. I did not have reliable transportation, I couldn't do that....

 

We didn't have room moms, teachers coordinated all parties. Parents could go to lunch as they wanted with the kids, other. Students could only join in if their parents gave permission.

 

But general parents helping in their students classroom..... Not allowed.

 

Volunteers reading and doing math with students? Done.... Especially in K where they have teams of "grandmas". We are near a retirement community. Those retired adults get preferential treatment for volunteering over the parents.

[RootAnn]

Parents volunteering at our local elementary is forbidden. If you want to help, you need to be hired as a paraprofessional. (You can be part of the PTA & even lead it if you are popular enough to be voted in.)

 

Perhaps that will change this year as we have a new principal. 

 

*I live in a SMALL town.*

[msjones]

Parents volunteering at our local elementary is forbidden. If you want to help, you need to be hired as a paraprofessional. (You can be part of the PTA & even lead it if you are popular enough to be voted in.)

 

Perhaps that will change this year as we have a new principal. 

 

*I live in a SMALL town.*

 

Have you asked about the rationale for this policy?  I'm willing to bet it has at least something to do with student privacy.  

 

I was so bothered by parents gossiping about my struggling students.  The kids are there to learn and grow and try again when they screw up.  They don't need parents yammering about their personal struggles.  It was a real problem.

[SKL]

Have you asked about the rationale for this policy?  I'm willing to bet it has at least something to do with student privacy.  

 

I was so bothered by parents gossiping about my struggling students.  The kids are there to learn and grow and try again when they screw up.  They don't need parents yammering about their personal struggles.  It was a real problem.

 

Hm, that is interesting.  I know last year, each time the teacher told me about something my kid had done wrong, she'd say "another parent saw this."  I never quite understood why she made it a point to tell me that.  Perhaps so I'd believe her (why wouldn't I?).  But what it made me feel was "your kid will now be known as the bad child."  So yeah, it would be nice to have some anonymity while our kids are too young to realize how mistakes can come back to bite them.  I suppose my kid's learning issues are also the talk of the PTA.  :/

[T'smom]

My first year teaching I had a parent volunteer to chaperone a field trip. He was drinking. (On this particular field trip there were a LOT of parent volunteers, and if we let one parent volunteer, we had to let them all....)

[Word Nerd]

I think this is really the key:
 
"I came to realize that parents involved in education in these other countries—but they are involved differently. They are more involved at home. And that, it turns out, might be one secret to their success."
 
I participate in PTO events and fundraisers (I refuse to contribute to all the other fundraisers the school does, since those all involve outside third parties and only a tiny fraction of any money raised goes to the school), and I help with one of the class parties every year. I am under no illusion that this volunteer time in itself contributes to the kids' education per se, but I think those kinds of activities help encourage more of a community feel in the school.

[SuzySparkle]

I pulled my kids out of school after my oldest dd's 4th grade year and my youngest dd's 1st grade year.

 

During the 5 years my oldest was in ps, I volunteered heavily. When the younger was still at home, I would help in the library (because they let me bring my younger and AWAYS needed help). The year my youngest started K5, my oldest was in 3rd. I volunteered as room mom coordinating activities in both of their classrooms. We coordinated Friday lunch coverage for the teachers, making copies for the teachers, weekly Computer Lab coverage for the teachers, monthly SEEDS lessons (reading a book and leading relevant craft) in the classroom, as well as tutoring in reading for the 3rd grade class. This was in addition to the constant requests from the PTA for people to lead/sell everything from Chick-Fil-A biscuits in the carline to the Fall fun event.

 

During the last year my dds were in school, the younger was in 1st and the older was in 4th. I agreed to take on a PTA chair position and then got roped into being room mom for BOTH rooms again because no one would volunteer for those jobs. It was a nightmare. I had stuff falling down all over the place, because I was also handling multiple extra curricular activities as well as church.  I know some people manage to do it all, but I am not one of them.

 

I guess I see this issue from both sides. It does make the teachers' jobs easier if they can get GOOD QUALITY help in the classroom. The time parents spend making copies and doing lunch and lab coverage gives them time to get to a few things that would otherwise need to be done after school or at home. However, it can be very frustrating for the parents who volunteer. I know people work, and I appreciate that their time is limited, but I felt like because I was able to stay home with my children and didn't work outside the home, there was much more pressure from the parent groups to pull my share and make up the excess to ensure our kids had the BEST school experience. I really didn't mind helping. I enjoyed it, but I think there is a lot of competition to have more volunteers/hours than the school down the road. And no matter how much you are there, it never seems to be enough. The same group of parents practically live at the school. If you are looking for some of them during school hours, you know to check the school log first.

 

As to the issue of privacy, I would have to agree. Just by being in the school during work hours, I heard things that were probably not meant for parents to hear. I kept my mouth shut, but things do have a way of getting around when you have people in the school not bound by the same rules as the employees. The problem is the parents are a benefit when they're helping kids with reading or math, but that does mean they know who's struggling.

 

We just felt like ps was a roller coaster of never-ending homework and constant fundraising. If my oldest was not having issues retaining what was being taught, we might have stuck it out. However, she was struggling. I thought about leaving the youngest in school because she was excelling and top of her class, but I figured we could even go farther with that at home and completely jump off the coaster.

 

We're happier now. I don't miss the ride. And the funny thing is, the other mom with whom I did much PTA work is also homeschooling this year. (We have a large community of hs'ers in our area!)

[strange_girl]

My kids have not been to public school, and I never went to public school, so I can't really comment on the 'normalcy' of the article. The one line that did jump out at me was that the one place where parent involvement was actually beneficial was when they did more at home. Absolutely. Of course. At home, in the family unit, is really where it's at. we all get that here.

 

However, the whole article just left a bad taste in my mouth. It made me feel that pretty soon kids would be raised completely without any family 'interference' at all...and raised by 'experts' who somehow know more than parents. :huh:

[Joker]

My dds are in middle school and I'm usually there volunteering 2-3 days per week. The only classroom I help in is band. I do bookkeeping, make copies, and work on coordinating volunteers for after school activities. The rest of my volunteering is for things like book fairs, fundraising, handing out textbooks, library, etc.

 

The one year both of them went to elementary school I was usually there every day helping out in the kindergarten room. That was an awesome teacher and there was always so much planned that she could always use a volunteer.