Class of 2014 college acceptances

[Caroline]

First choice at what step of the process?

 

 

The article says the information was gathered from college freshmen. I looked at the full report and I cannot figure out when the survey was given. It is certainly after all decisions have been made. The full report says that fewer students are attending their first choice university than in the past. I do think your question is relevant. If the survey is given after students have arrived on campus and settled in, which school was their first choice may get blurred a little if they are happy and having a good time. Also, first choices change a lot along the way. DS went through a couple of months with a different first choice, but went back to his original. I know Cynthia has said her son's first choice has become not as obvious as it was a couple of months ago. The question simply asks "is this college your (mark one" and then choices first choice, second choice, third choice, higher than third choice are given.

[Nan in Mass]

*LC - It will always be the case that from one perspective, one will find a choice very hard, while when looked at from another perspective, one will see how lucky one is even to have a choice.  "We should all have such problems" is a stereotype for a reason. LOL  It makes the hard choice easier to know that life will be ok either way UNLESS one is pushing the boundaries.  When pushing the boundaries, one is choosing between a good, safe path and an extraodinary risky path.  Often, these college choices that look from the outside like they are so easy to make involve pushing boundaries - academic ones, emotional ones, or financial ones.  Parents naturally try to guide their children towards the best path.  That doesn't stop with the college decisions, but hopefully by then, as you said, the child will be strong enough to do what is right for himself and the parents will be sending the message that it is the child's decision, ultimately, no matter how strongly they feel one way or the other.  Hopefully, they will listen to each other.  I think you are right and that no matter what Cynthia says, her son will know how she feels.  In that case, being honest and laying out her reasons, but also honestly reassuring her son that it is his decision, might be the best approach?  She has been very clear about her feelings with us, so it isn't as though she doesn't understand herself.  She is probably being equally clear with her son, but of course, when she is speaking with us, she doesn't need to put in all the reassurances that she does with her son', since she's not speaking to him, just to her own friends.  I really liked your suggestion of telling her son he doesn't have to justify his choices.  It is so hard to put your reasons into words at that age, even really good reasons.

 

Nan

[Hoggirl]

Thanks, Nan. You articulated this far better than I.

 

He has a top three. I only *struggle* with one of those. Part of my struggle is pride, part of it is that *I* don't think it is the best fit overall. I do think he could go there, thrive, and be happy. I think he could do that at any of his three choices. One thing I do not want him to do is to be too focused on the money. As I am sure you can guess, he has one choice that is free, one choice that is full-freight, and one choice that is in-between.

[Teachin'Mine]

The following were written in response to my congratulatory post to Hoggirl in which I wrote:  There is only one Stanford!

 

 

 

Again, I don't get this statement. There is only one of every school. 

 

 

I think the conversation here is more the exception than the rule. But I am still glad these stories of amazing talent are shared bc it is inspirational for me. My kids don't have these types of opportunities but I can celebrate those that do (while still agreeing 100% that I also do not get the Stanford comment.)

 

Yes LC there is absolutely only one of any school, I meant this more figuratively than literally.

 

I think an analogy might help and I'll exaggerate the situation, so please don't misunderstand that I'm comparing other colleges in a similar way.   Just trying to help both of you, and anyone else who may not understand, what I was saying.

 

Little Johnny is told that they'll be going to an amusement park next weekend.  He's given the choice of a local carnival, the bumper boats and racing karts in the next town, or Cedar Point.  Johnny while thrilled with the prospect of going to any amusement park shouts excitedly, "There's only one Cedar Point!"

 

If you're suggesting that all colleges are the same, then I would definitely have to disagree.  But I don't think that's the situation.  Sure there are other highly rated amusement parks, including those owned by Disney and Six Flags and independently owned ones as well, but there is only one Cedar Point.  If you're looking for a specific ride, or rides,  that only Cedar Point has, then for you no others would compare.   For others going to an amusement park they couldn't imagine anything better than Disney and others would be thrilled to get a free park admission to a great amusement park which is great, but not quite as highly rated.

 

I'm hoping this provided clarity and not further confusion.  Everyone, of those who are fortunate enough to go to an amusement park, gets to choose where based on their particular interest and of course based on location and cost.   In much the same way, each of us make college selections, but that has the added glitch that the college must first allow you to attend, and as is natural, the ones which are hardest to get into (ranked #2 with 6.6% admitted) and rated highly (Stanford #5 US News National Universities) are highly regarded by most people.  One of the things which impresses me about Stanford is its 5:1 student to faculty ratio. 

 

 

[8filltheheart]

The article says the information was gathered from college freshmen. I looked at the full report and I cannot figure out when the survey was given. It is certainly after all decisions have been made. The full report says that fewer students are attending their first choice university than in the past. I do think your question is relevant. If the survey is given after students have arrived on campus and settled in, which school was their first choice may get blurred a little if they are happy and having a good time. Also, first choices change a lot along the way. DS went through a couple of months with a different first choice, but went back to his original. I know Cynthia has said her son's first choice has become not as obvious as it was a couple of months ago. The question simply asks "is this college your (mark one" and then choices first choice, second choice, third choice, higher than third choice are given.

 

I think collecting data then probably does impact the results.   Ds has already dismissed his other options and is moving on quite happy with his future. 

 

[Jane in NC]

First choice at what step of the process?  Dickinson College was my son's first choice for about two years because of their amazing Archaeology Lab.  That was until the revelation that he would rather focus on Roman archaeology over Greek.

 

So maybe he was an anomaly, searching for a college by mentor shopping. He found a good one.

 

Quoting myself for clarification.

 

My point was that my son's "first choice" college evolved throughout the process.  Through his college visits, he fine tuned his choice as he began looking more closely for a mentor. 

 

1/4 of all students don't end up at their first choice.   That is still a pretty high number of students.  I don't know that it would be an anomaly.   Our ds isn't going to attend his first choice either b/c of cost.   My older 2 did end up at their first choice.   So right now he is in the 1/3 category just in our own family.  :)   I do think that most students are probably more like our older 2 and students like our current sr are fewer in number.

I do wish the study had clarified what was meant by a "first choice". There is the first choice when the application process begins vs. the first choice of the financial reality or the first choice after the overnights.  My point was that my son's "first choice" was not constant. It would surprise me if so many students had their eyes on a single college throughout!

[8filltheheart]

The following were written in response to my congratulatory post to Hoggirl in which I wrote:  There is only one Stanford!

 

 

 

 

Yes LC there is absolutely only one of any school, I meant this more figuratively than literally.

 

I think an analogy might help and I'll exaggerate the situation, so please don't misunderstand that I'm comparing other colleges in a similar way.   Just trying to help both of you, and anyone else who may not understand, what I was saying.

 

Little Johnny is told that they'll be going to an amusement park next weekend.  He's given the choice of a local carnival, the bumper boats and racing karts in the next town, or Cedar Point.  Johnny while thrilled with the prospect of going to any amusement park shouts excitedly, "There's only one Cedar Point!"

 

If you're suggesting that all colleges are the same, then I would definitely have to disagree.  But I don't think that's the situation.  Sure there are other highly rated amusement parks, including those owned by Disney and Six Flags and independently owned ones as well, but there is only one Cedar Point.  If you're looking for a specific ride, or rides,  that only Cedar Point has, then for you no others would compare.   For others going to an amusement park they couldn't imagine anything better than Disney and others would be thrilled to get a free park admission to a great amusement park which is great, but not quite as highly rated.

 

I'm hoping this provided clarity and not further confusion.  Everyone, of those who are fortunate enough to go to an amusement park, gets to choose where based on their particular interest and of course based on location and cost.   In much the same way, each of us make college selections, but that has the added glitch that the college must first allow you to attend, and as is natural, the ones which are hardest to get into (ranked #2 with 6.6% admitted) and rated highly (Stanford #5 US News National Universities) are highly regarded by most people.  One of the things which impresses me about Stanford is its 5:1 student to faculty ratio. 

 

I understand your analogy and that **you** see there being only 1 Stanford.   But that isn't the same as everyone seeing that Stanford is the obvious choice.   Your post was that you couldn't imagine the decision not already being made b/c there is only 1 Stanford.   The offers her ds has are not comparable to the local carnival or bumper boats and racing karts.   Cynthia's ds has some pretty amazing options to select amg.   I don't see Stanford's ranking as making it automatically the best option for any student w/o discerning the full picture.

 

[Caroline]

Cynthia, when you say U of A, are you referring to Arkansas or Bama? I have been reading it as Bama, but perhaps you mean Arkansas.

 

Back to your regularly scheduled thread now...

[Hoggirl]

Cynthia, when you say U of A, are you referring to Arkansas or Bama? I have been reading it as Bama, but perhaps you mean Arkansas.

 

Back to your regularly scheduled thread now...

Arkansas!! That's the reason behind my handle being "Hoggirl." Though I did not attend, my dh did.

 

Within collegiate sports, Arkansas is rather unique. Yes, there are other Div 1 schools who play football, etc., but there really is no in-state rivalry like there are so many other places. No Auburn/Alabama, no Florida/Florida State, etc. Pretty much EVERYONE in the state roots for the Hogs - even those of us who attended a small, LAC. ;) WPS - that stands for Woo Pig Sooie for those who are not indoctrinated.

[Caroline]

I don't make a very good southerner, although my northern friends tell me I sound like one these days. It took me years to figure out that USC might mean University of South Carolina as opposed to Southern California. Although I can sing the Ramblin' Reck song now, and it's growing on me, when you change out the anti-feminist lines, which I have heard quite a few times at GT this year. And you'll never catch me in red and black on football weekend.

 

Arkansas!! That's the reason behind my handle being "Hoggirl." Though I did not attend, my dh did.

 

Within collegiate sports, Arkansas is rather unique. Yes, there are other Div 1 schools who play football, etc., but there really is no in-state rivalry like there are so many other places. No Auburn/Alabama, no Florida/Florida State, etc. Pretty much EVERYONE in the state roots for the Hogs - even those of us who attended a small, LAC. ;) WPS - that stands for Woo Pig Sooie for those who are not indoctrinated.

[Hoggirl]

The following were written in response to my congratulatory post to Hoggirl in which I wrote: There is only one Stanford!

 

 

 

 

Yes LC there is absolutely only one of any school, I meant this more figuratively than literally.

 

I think an analogy might help and I'll exaggerate the situation, so please don't misunderstand that I'm comparing other colleges in a similar way. Just trying to help both of you, and anyone else who may not understand, what I was saying.

 

Little Johnny is told that they'll be going to an amusement park next weekend. He's given the choice of a local carnival, the bumper boats and racing karts in the next town, or Cedar Point. Johnny while thrilled with the prospect of going to any amusement park shouts excitedly, "There's only one Cedar Point!"

 

If you're suggesting that all colleges are the same, then I would definitely have to disagree. But I don't think that's the situation. Sure there are other highly rated amusement parks, including those owned by Disney and Six Flags and independently owned ones as well, but there is only one Cedar Point. If you're looking for a specific ride, or rides, that only Cedar Point has, then for you no others would compare. For others going to an amusement park they couldn't imagine anything better than Disney and others would be thrilled to get a free park admission to a great amusement park which is great, but not quite as highly rated.

 

I'm hoping this provided clarity and not further confusion. Everyone, of those who are fortunate enough to go to an amusement park, gets to choose where based on their particular interest and of course based on location and cost. In much the same way, each of us make college selections, but that has the added glitch that the college must first allow you to attend, and as is natural, the ones which are hardest to get into (ranked #2 with 6.6% admitted) and rated highly (Stanford #5 US News National Universities) are highly regarded by most people. One of the things which impresses me about Stanford is its 5:1 student to faculty ratio.

How ironic will it be if I toss in the fact that when ds was little he was TOTALLY fixated on roller coasters? He wanted to design roller coasters when he grew up. His daddy drove him to Cedar Point for a father-son trip (I don't do roller coasters). Ha ha! I will also add that he has been to Disney, Six Flags, and some of the dinkiest amusement parks you can imagine. He had fun at ALL of them.

[Teachin'Mine]

I understand your analogy and that **you** see there being only 1 Stanford.   But that isn't the same as everyone seeing that Stanford is the obvious choice.   Your post was that you couldn't imagine the decision not already being made b/c there is only 1 Stanford.   The offers her ds has are not comparable to the local carnival or bumper boats and racing karts.   Cynthia's ds has some pretty amazing options to select amg.   I don't see Stanford's ranking as making it automatically the best option for any student w/o discerning the full picture.

 

 

No.  I clarified in my post that I was not making a direct correlation from the amusement park choices to the college choices. 

 

Again, my words "There is only one Stanford!" please see my post again on what was meant by that statement.

 

Yes, Cynthia's son does have several amazing options.   I'm sure he will choose well and I would never think of doing anything other than congratulating him and wishing him well no matter where he chooses.   This is where we seem to differ.  For the past two years, several of your posts about dual enrollment have pointed out that your son's choice to attend a local university rather than a community college is what made dual enrollment a good choice, and far better than community college.  I didn't agree then, and still don't.  But I would never say that your choice was wrong, and with your specific community college and it's course offerings and the university he attended, I have no doubt that you made the best choice for his education.  Similarly, we chose the local community college for dual enrollment and made the best choice for our family.   We don't have to devalue other people's choices if they're different than our own.  You've chosen a great honors program in a state university and that's a great choice for your family,  It doesn't mean that if someone were to chooses a private school, even if it costs more, isn't making a good choice as well.  Our students and our situations are all different and there are many paths to a great education.  I have no idea what choice Cynthia's son will make, and my comment about Stanford is simply my own opinion.  

 

I'm so happy for your son as he's going to have amazing opportunities at the university he's chosen.  I wish him all the best!  Nothing that anyone else chooses, or why they choose it, will in any way diminish your son's accomplishments or take away from the great offer he received and has accepted from the university of his choice.   I have no doubt that Cynthia's son will get a great education at any of his top choices and you're right that he does have great choices and he will likely put a lot of thought and carefully weigh each choice and decide well.  

[8filltheheart]

. It would surprise me if so many students had their eyes on a single college throughout!

 

Not being around a lot of ps students, I am clueless.   But, amg homeschoolers, I can only think of a handful that we know IRL that applied to more than 1.   Our oldest  only applied to one.   All of his friends only applied to one.   J's friends this yr and last yr all only applied to 1.   I can't think of a single other homeschooler in our group that applied to more than the local university!   The same holds true for a large percentage of the ps kids from youth group and swing dancing (my teens main activities).   There are a few of them that applied to other schools (one applied to Yale), but state flagships, local university, and a couple of other locally "talked about" colleges are about it.

[Teachin'Mine]

How ironic will it be if I toss in the fact that when ds was little he was TOTALLY fixated on roller coasters? He wanted to design roller coasters when he grew up. His daddy drove him to Cedar Point for a father-son trip (I don't do roller coasters). Ha ha! I will also add that he has been to Disney, Six Flags, and some of the dinkiest amusement parks you can imagine. He had fun at ALL of them.

 

That's funny!   Yeah I'd be hard pressed to come up with an amusement park I haven't liked as well.  When you're there, wherever that is, and having fun there's no reason to be regretting not being somewhere else.   If his parents had offered to just take him to the local carnival, I'm sure Little Johnny would agree and have a cotton candy smeared, ear-to-ear smile on all the rides! 

[Teachin'Mine]

8, now that your son has made his decision and the college admission/selection process is over, you can join Sue in St Pete on the beach wearing shades!   You are in the very fortunate situation of being able to take all that you've learned from this experience to make the whole process easier for your younger students.  I'm sure it will be a very different process with each as students are all different, but you'll have had valuable experience in your role as guidance counselor.  As for me, not only do I not know what college Cynthia's son will choose, I have no idea what choice my own dd will ultimately make.  

[Jane in NC]

Not being around a lot of ps students, I am clueless.   But, amg homeschoolers, I can only think of a handful that we know IRL that applied to more than 1.   Our oldest  only applied to one.   All of his friends only applied to one.   J's friends this yr and last yr all only applied to 1.   I can't think of a single other homeschooler in our group that applied to more than the local university!   The same holds true for a large percentage of the ps kids from youth group and swing dancing (my teens main activities).   There are a few of them that applied to other schools (one applied to Yale), but state flagships, local university, and a couple of other locally "talked about" colleges are about it.

 

This is quite different than my experience.  It has become quite difficult to gain acceptance at some state flagship universities (UNC-CH, University of Michigan, etc.) so most students have at least a backup plan. 

 

Of course it remains popular to attend the CC for dual enrollment and then live at home while attending the regional university.  Finances can dictate this. 

 

Children of my academic friends usually apply to four or six schools.  Perhaps these parents are more aware of how fit can be important.

[Caroline]

The same study you referenced earlier says that 55% of freshmen applied to at least 4 universities. I understand that isn't what you are seeing locally, but that's what the data says. Most of my students applied to at least two universities--the local state and the state university downtown. (Not to be confused with midtown, where another state university is located.)

 

Not being around a lot of ps students, I am clueless. But, amg homeschoolers, I can only think of a handful that we know IRL that applied to more than 1. Our oldest only applied to one. All of his friends only applied to one. J's friends this yr and last yr all only applied to 1. I can't think of a single other homeschooler in our group that applied to more than the local university! The same holds true for a large percentage of the ps kids from youth group and swing dancing (my teens main activities). There are a few of them that applied to other schools (one applied to Yale), but state flagships, local university, and a couple of other locally "talked about" colleges are about it.

[8filltheheart]

This is quite different than my experience.  It has become quite difficult to gain acceptance at some state flagship universities (UNC-CH, University of Michigan, etc.) so most students have at least a backup plan. 

 

Of course it remains popular to attend the CC for dual enrollment and then live at home while attending the regional university.  Finances can dictate this. 

 

Children of my academic friends usually apply to four or six schools.  Perhaps these parents are more aware of how fit can be important.

 

Yes, fit is rarely discussed amg the homeschoolers I know.  Local universities are the number 1 choice typically.   State flagships are less common unless they plan on CC for 2 yrs and transferring via articulation agreements.

[Jane in NC]

Yes, fit is rarely discussed amg the homeschoolers I know.  Local universities are the number 1 choice typically.   State flagships are less common unless they plan on CC for 2 yrs and transferring via articulation agreements.

 

You must have more options.  Engineering students near me are applying to NCSU, UNC-Charlotte, etc.--nothing within a commutable distance.

 

[8filltheheart]

No.  I clarified in my post that I was not making a direct correlation from the amusement park choices to the college choices. 

 

Again, my words "There is only one Stanford!" please see my post again on what was meant by that statement.

 

Yes, Cynthia's son does have several amazing options.   I'm sure he will choose well and I would never think of doing anything other than congratulating him and wishing him well no matter where he chooses.   This is where we seem to differ.  For the past two years, several of your posts about dual enrollment have pointed out that your son's choice to attend a local university rather than a community college is what made dual enrollment a good choice, and far better than community college.  I didn't agree then, and still don't.  But I would never say that your choice was wrong, and with your specific community college and it's course offerings and the university he attended, I have no doubt that you made the best choice for his education.  Similarly, we chose the local community college for dual enrollment and made the best choice for our family.   We don't have to devalue other people's choices if they're different than our own.  You've chosen a great honors program in a state university and that's a great choice for your family,  It doesn't mean that if someone were to chooses a private school, even if it costs more, isn't making a good choice as well.  Our students and our situations are all different and there are many paths to a great education.  I have no idea what choice Cynthia's son will make, and my comment about Stanford is simply my own opinion.  

 

I'm so happy for your son as he's going to have amazing opportunities at the university he's chosen.  I wish him all the best!  Nothing that anyone else chooses, or why they choose it, will in any way diminish your son's accomplishments or take away from the great offer he received and has accepted from the university of his choice.   I have no doubt that Cynthia's son will get a great education at any of his top choices and you're right that he does have great choices and he will likely put a lot of thought and carefully weigh each choice and decide well.  

 

You have completely misconstrued my posts.   I don't have a clue what the bolded has to do with my posts at all.   You posted that you couldn't imagine the choice not already being made b/c there is only 1 Stanford IN RESPONSE to my post that Cynthia's ds had some major decision making to do.   http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/484961-class-of-2014-college-acceptances/?p=5560538  (you quoted my post when you wrote your response.)    When I said that it wouldn't be that easy of a decision here......that was from MY family's perspective on what I have read about Cynthia's ds's options, NOT from Cynthia's perspective.  

 

How on earth that is DEVALUING other people's choices, I don't have a clue.  

 

[8filltheheart]

The same study you referenced earlier says that 55% of freshmen applied to at least 4 universities. I understand that isn't what you are seeing locally, but that's what the data says. Most of my students applied to at least two universities--the local state and the state university downtown. (Not to be confused with midtown, where another state university is located.)

 

 

I didn't actually go and read the study, only the article.   But 45% is still quite a few students not applying a large number of schools.   Based on the acceptances posts on this board, it seems like way more than 55% applied to multiple schools based on the sheer number of acceptances.

You must have more options.  Engineering students near me are applying to NCSU, UNC-Charlotte, etc.--nothing within a commutable distance.

 

 Yes, all of the local universities we have lived near have had engineering programs.   Even VCU has an engineering program though people don't think of it b/c of VT. 

[Teachin'Mine]

You have completely misconstrued my posts.   I don't have a clue what the bolded has to do with my posts at all.   You posted that you couldn't imagine the choice not already being made b/c there is only 1 Stanford IN RESPONSE to my post that Cynthia's ds had some major decision making to do.   http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/484961-class-of-2014-college-acceptances/?p=5560538  (you quoted my post when you wrote your response.)    When I said that it wouldn't be that easy of a decision here......that was from MY family's perspective on what I have read about Cynthia's ds's options, NOT from Cynthia's perspective.  

 

How on earth that is DEVALUING other people's choices, I don't have a clue.  

 

 

Yes.  My comment in the post you linked was also just my opinion.  I think it's best to let the rest go. 

 

Congratulations again to your son on his acceptance, scholarships, and choice of his university!

[creekland]

8, now that your son has made his decision and the college admission/selection process is over, you can join Sue in St Pete on the beach wearing shades!   You are in the very fortunate situation of being able to take all that you've learned from this experience to make the whole process easier for your younger students.  I'm sure it will be a very different process with each as students are all different, but you'll have had valuable experience in your role as guidance counselor.  As for me, not only do I not know what college Cynthia's son will choose, I have no idea what choice my own dd will ultimately make.  

 

Um, excuse me, but I think MY son is the only one who chose a college on the beach, no?  ;)  Sue in St Pete happens to live in the same city (and my guy also lived in that city for his first 6 months of life), but unless she has a waterfront house... and if she DOES have a waterfront house, where's our invitation to be staying with her???

 

What a shame... having to visit a college (and later, son at said college) that's right on the water... :coolgleamA:

 

Not being around a lot of ps students, I am clueless.   But, amg homeschoolers, I can only think of a handful that we know IRL that applied to more than 1.   Our oldest  only applied to one.   All of his friends only applied to one.   J's friends this yr and last yr all only applied to 1.   I can't think of a single other homeschooler in our group that applied to more than the local university!   The same holds true for a large percentage of the ps kids from youth group and swing dancing (my teens main activities).   There are a few of them that applied to other schools (one applied to Yale), but state flagships, local university, and a couple of other locally "talked about" colleges are about it.

 

Among the ps students at my school who plan to attend a 4 year college, most apply to at least 3 or 4 schools.  Some do fewer, of course, but others do more.  It's rare to have them only apply to one unless they know exactly what they want and where (like my guy did).

[8filltheheart]

Yes.  My comment in the post you linked was also just my opinion.  I think it's best to let the rest go. 

 

Congratulations again to your son on his acceptance, scholarships, and choice of his university!

 

Yes, I agree it's best to let it go.   Not one of my posts was meant to insinuate what you implied in your posts.   I went back and read them and still have no idea how you got that I implied "It doesn't mean that if someone were to chooses a private school, even if it costs more, isn't making a good choice as well."   Jeepers.   I wish we had more $$ and $$ wasn't the controlling factor in my ds's decision.   It had nothing to do with fit or public or private.   It all came down to what we could afford.   His other options would be better "fits" but financially we don't have that financial luxury.   I am not bitter about it at all.   I am thrilled that he has the opportunity he does have b/c having the honors program makes it a better fit than it would be without it and he most likely would have ended up there even w/o the honors program b/c he only had 3 schools that were financially feasible and he rejected the other 2.

[8filltheheart]

Arkansas!! That's the reason behind my handle being "Hoggirl." Though I did not attend, my dh did.

 

Within collegiate sports, Arkansas is rather unique. Yes, there are other Div 1 schools who play football, etc., but there really is no in-state rivalry like there are so many other places. No Auburn/Alabama, no Florida/Florida State, etc. Pretty much EVERYONE in the state roots for the Hogs - even those of us who attended a small, LAC. ;) WPS - that stands for Woo Pig Sooie for those who are not indoctrinated.

 

I always wondered where Hoggirl came from!!   I am glad shared where it came from.   Curiousity satisfied.  ;)

[Teachin'Mine]

Um, excuse me, but I think MY son is the only one who chose a college on the beach, no?  ;)  Sue in St Pete happens to live in the same city (and my guy also lived in that city for his first 6 months of life), but unless she has a waterfront house... and if she DOES have a waterfront house, where's our invitation to be staying with her???

 

What a shame... having to visit a college (and later, son at said college) that's right on the water... :coolgleamA:

 

 

Among the ps students at my school who plan to attend a 4 year college, most apply to at least 3 or 4 schools.  Some do fewer, of course, but others do more.  It's rare to have them only apply to one unless they know exactly what they want and where (like my guy did).

 

:lol:   I forgot that you've already got your shades on in anticipation of the Florida sun and fun!  :D   I'm picturing your family spending Christmas near your son instead of having him fly up!  Sounds like he's in for a rough four years.  

 

Hmmm ...  how about a WTM pool/beach party at Sue's?   January or February sounds good!  

 

 

Yes, I agree it's best to let it go.   Not one of my posts was meant to insinuate what you implied in your posts.   I went back and read them and still have no idea how you got that I implied "It doesn't mean that if someone were to chooses a private school, even if it costs more, isn't making a good choice as well."   Jeepers.   I wish we had more $$ and $$ wasn't the controlling factor in my ds's decision.   It had nothing to do with fit or public or private.   It all came down to what we could afford.   His other options would be better "fits" but financially we don't have that financial luxury.   I am not bitter about it at all.   I am thrilled that he has the opportunity he does have b/c having the honors program makes it a better fit than it would be without it and he most likely would have ended up there even w/o the honors program b/c he only had 3 schools that were financially feasible and he rejected the other 2.

 

8 a lot of us will be basing our decisions on finances.  It's a reality.   His honors program and the kind of attention he'll be getting sounds amazing.   I'll bet that your son and his research will bring his university some nice attention with physics or astrophysics or whatever area he ends up in.  He's got a gift and the programs he'll be in will have the professors and resources to help him soar.  

 

 

I always wondered where Hoggirl came from!!   I am glad shared where it came from.   Curiousity satisfied.  ;)

 

Me too!   For a couple of years I tried picturing her on a Harley, but the avatar didn't fit at all!  :lol:  

 

Thanks for solving the mystery Hoggirl! 

[Hoggirl]

Oh, my word! That is too funny! I have had people think that I live on a hog farm before, but I have not known of anyone who assumed I was a biker chick. Makes sense, though.

 

I have sometimes worried that people might think I eat like I hog! Eek!

[creekland]

Oh, my word! That is too funny! I have had people think that I live on a hog farm before, but I have not known of anyone who assumed I was a biker chick. Makes sense, though.

 

I have sometimes worried that people might think I eat like I hog! Eek!

 

Since we live in the land where Harleys are made, I assumed biker at first... It definitely wouldn't be unusual for around here.

 

[8filltheheart]

Oh, my word! That is too funny! I have had people think that I live on a hog farm before, but I have not known of anyone who assumed I was a biker chick. Makes sense, though.

 

I have sometimes worried that people might think I eat like I hog! Eek!

Well, in case your curious, ;) , I wondered if you were a descendent of the Hogg's. Not sure why, but I remember my dad talking about them when I was little. Didn't picture a Harley, funny! :)

[Nan in Mass]

I assumed you raised pigs.  That it was associated with football or a university would NEVER EVER have occurred to me lol.

 

Nan

[Susan in TN]

   I wish we had more $$ and $$ wasn't the controlling factor in my ds's decision.   It had nothing to do with fit or public or private.   It all came down to what we could afford.   His other options would be better "fits" but financially we don't have that financial luxury.   I am not bitter about it at all.  

 

Today I am definitely feeling bitter.  Ds had his lesson today, and I mentioned that he would be participating in a Jazz workshop at his likely University.  His teacher immediately went on to discuss why that school really isn't a good fit for ds because of X, Y, and Z.  Gee, thanks.  I know that already.  But we don't have an extra $25K to fork over for his other choices.  And we really can't justify taking out loans when he will have close to a full ride and be able to graduate without any debt, which is particularly useful when you want to continue on to graduate school and pursue a career with fairly low job and income potential. 

 

I need to bury myself in chocolate and another zombie apocalypse novel.

 

[Nan in Mass]

Hugs, Susan.  Does the school your son is going to be attending have a nice website?  If so, it might help to go and look at it and see the things the students are doing, the nice things.  Most colleges are amazing places.  Can you find some opportunities that YOU would love, that would make you feel better about where he is going?  Semester abroad?  Internship?  A cool club?  Or sport?  Or theatre program?  Or class?  It doesn't really matter if it is something your son would like or not.  The idea is to help YOU feel that the college has lots of interesting things about it.  That will help you to stop looking at the colleges that would be a better fit and focus on just that one. ( I found that helpful with the older two, whose college choices were not something we expected.  Of course, I found it helpful AFTER I had escaped into a good book with a large quantity of chocolate lol.  That is the best thing strategy.  Be someone else for awhile.  Reading is amazing.)

 

Here's hoping you can find LOTS of time for reading in the month ahead,

Hugs,

Nan

[Hoggirl]

Today I am definitely feeling bitter. Ds had his lesson today, and I mentioned that he would be participating in a Jazz workshop at his likely University. His teacher immediately went on to discuss why that school really isn't a good fit for ds because of X, Y, and Z. Gee, thanks. I know that already. But we don't have an extra $25K to fork over for his other choices. And we really can't justify taking out loans when he will have close to a full ride and be able to graduate without any debt, which is particularly useful when you want to continue on to graduate school and pursue a career with fairly low job and income potential.

 

I need to bury myself in chocolate and another zombie apocalypse novel.

 

Um, I'm sorry, but I would have a "conversation" with your ds's teacher. It's really none of his/her beeswax, kwim. It would be VERY hard for me not to throw in some snark and ask if s/he would like to make up the cost differential??? Especially since you have been paying for lessons all these years?? Sorry. I know that isn't helpful, and I wouldn't really say that, but I would say *something.* It was just completely inappropriate for him/her to do that in front of your ds. Unfortunately, words are like toothpaste, and you can't get them to go back in after they have come out, so the teacher can't really undo what has already been said.

[Susan in TN]

It was just completely inappropriate for him/her to do that in front of your ds. Unfortunately, words are like toothpaste, and you can't get them to go back in after they have come out, so the teacher can't really undo what has already been said.

 

Fortunately, ds was not in the room at the time. I am hoping his teacher managed to keep his mouth shut otherwise.

 

Hugs, Susan. Does the school your son is going to be attending have a nice website? If so, it might help to go and look at it and see the things the students are doing, the nice things. Most colleges are amazing places. Can you find some opportunities that YOU would love, that would make you feel better about where he is going? Semester abroad? Internship? A cool club? Or sport? Or theatre program? Or class? It doesn't really matter if it is something your son would like or not. The idea is to help YOU feel that the college has lots of interesting things about it. That will help you to stop looking at the colleges that would be a better fit and focus on just that one. ( I found that helpful with the older two, whose college choices were not something we expected. Of course, I found it helpful AFTER I had escaped into a good book with a large quantity of chocolate lol. That is the best thing strategy. Be someone else for awhile. Reading is amazing.)

 

Here's hoping you can find LOTS of time for reading in the month ahead,

Hugs,

Nan

Thank you - this is such helpful advice! I know I will feel better in a couple days, chocolate or no, but I really need to get a hold of myself and stop letting these things effect me so much.

[regentrude]

I assumed you raised pigs.

That makes two of us. Or at least that she liked pigs.

I do not understand the relation to sports, can anybody spell it out clearly for this ignorant foreigner?

[Sunshine State Sue]

Um, excuse me, but I think MY son is the only one who chose a college on the beach, no?  ;)  Sue in St Pete happens to live in the same city (and my guy also lived in that city for his first 6 months of life), but unless she has a waterfront house... and if she DOES have a waterfront house, where's our invitation to be staying with her???

:bigear: Dh likes to say that we live on the "mountain" of St Petersburg - 40ft above sea level.  That's a good thing if you have heard any of the news about flood insurance lately.  No waterfront property, but there will be a brand new guest bedroom come August... ;)

 

Hmmm ...  how about a WTM pool/beach party at Sue's?   January or February sounds good!

We do have a pool, but the heater is busted...

[Sunshine State Sue]

That makes two of us. Or at least that she liked pigs.

I do not understand the relation to sports, can anybody spell it out clearly for this ignorant foreigner?

My in-laws live a stone's throw away from U of Arkansas.  The school mascot is a razorback pig.  That may remind you of another mom on the boards...

 

I think the pig has to do with Tyson who is a big employer in AR.  But, maybe that's just a rumor.

[Hoggirl]

My in-laws live a stone's throw away from U of Arkansas. The school mascot is a razorback pig. That may remind you of another mom on the boards...

 

I think the pig has to do with Tyson who is a big employer in AR. But, maybe that's just a rumor.

Ha ha! No, it has nothing to do with Tyson! Razorbacks have been around much longer than Tyson.

 

The mascot for the University of Arkansas is the Razorback, which is a wild hog. The main cheer that Hog fans do, is to "call the Hogs." A very long "Woooooooooooooo," followed by "Pig, Sooie!" You do it three times and then yell, "Razorbacks!"

 

I am not smart enough to link - you should google it!

 

Another thing that makes following the U of A sports teams so popular is that we have no professional teams in our state to compete with them. They are THE state team.

 

ETA: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arkansas_Razorbacks

 

The beginning part of the article explains the mascot.

[Hoggirl]

Especially for Regentrude - here is an instructional video for you!

 

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=n0w8vX6UQN0

[8filltheheart]

Today I am definitely feeling bitter. Ds had his lesson today, and I mentioned that he would be participating in a Jazz workshop at his likely University. His teacher immediately went on to discuss why that school really isn't a good fit for ds because of X, Y, and Z. Gee, thanks. I know that already. But we don't have an extra $25K to fork over for his other choices. And we really can't justify taking out loans when he will have close to a full ride and be able to graduate without any debt, which is particularly useful when you want to continue on to graduate school and pursue a career with fairly low job and income potential.

 

I need to bury myself in chocolate and another zombie apocalypse novel.

 

So sorry Susan. Your music teacher was out of line. How is your ds taking it? It would probably be harder on me if my ds cared. He is perfectly happy. He spent hours upon hours in prayer during the yr. He would literally ask me if he could go to Adoration (prayer in front of the Holy Eucharist) a couple of times per week. He feels like he has ended up where he was meant to go and has complete peace with it.

 

Nan has given you great advice. I hope you are able to find positives that bring you some peace.

[JennW in SoCal]

Awww, Susan.  Go back and read the thread about attending the not-so-great music school and remember that there will be other wonderful and creative musicians and instructors at your son's school.  There will also be many great professional opportunities in the community around campus, too, which your ds will start to learn about once he is on campus.  And Nan's advice about looking at the other opportunities on campus is excellent. I know she was suggesting that you look at them so you feel better, but you know it is a good thing for music majors to have a life outside music and a well-rounded campus will offer a variety of activities.

 

Musicians, including music teachers, can be a very insular, myopic lot, who have only one way of thinking. They can be totally undiplomatic when talking with parents and students.  Your son's teacher clearly wasn't thinking about practical reasons why college x is off the table, and he probably can't even wrap his head around the good points of the affordable school.  In fact, he likely doesn't know that much about the school!  I'm sure he wants the best for your ds, just didn't stop to think that it might be a sore subject at the moment!

 

 

[Brenda in MA]

He spent hours upon hours in prayer during the yr. He would literally ask me if he could go to Adoration (prayer in front of the Holy Eucharist) a couple of times per week. He feels like he has ended up where he was meant to go and has complete peace with it.

Love this! My son also spent a lot of time in Adoration this past year, and it has had a wonderful, calming effect on him. He started the year very agitated about the upcoming changes, and now he seems to be at peace, and even a bit excited about the future. God is good....

 

Brenda

[8filltheheart]

Love this! My son also spent a lot of time in Adoration this past year, and it has had a wonderful, calming effect on him. He started the year very agitated about the upcoming changes, and now he seems to be at peace, and even a bit excited about the future. God is good....

 

Brenda

Isn't it amazing! My prayer now is that he can find a great group of Catholics on campus.

[Susan in TN]

So sorry Susan. Your music teacher was out of line. How is your ds taking it? It would probably be harder on me if my ds cared. He is perfectly happy. He spent hours upon hours in prayer during the yr. He would literally ask me if he could go to Adoration (prayer in front of the Holy Eucharist) a couple of times per week. He feels like he has ended up where he was meant to go and has complete peace with it.

 

Nan has given you great advice. I hope you are able to find positives that bring you some peace.

 

It is sometimes hard to read ds - he is fairly quiet, but overall I think he is doing OK.  He mentioned the other day that he knows that how he uses his time in college is far more important than where he goes.  And talking through some things today, we realized a few aspects of this school that we found at the beginning of this whole process (a couple of the professors, networking, and the extensive travel abroad program) really do make it a decent choice, particularly when you consider how affordable it will be for us and ds.

 

[Beth in OH]

His teacher immediately went on to discuss why that school really isn't a good fit for ds because of X, Y, and Z.  

 

Hang in there, Susan!  My violin dd went through this, and it really stunk!  DePaul wasn't the school of her dreams at the time, and she was really struggling with it.  The teacher comments were so out of line.

 

Our story has a happy ending, and hopefully yours will too!  Dd is graduating in June, and she is continuing on at DePaul for grad school in violin performance.  She said, "I don't feel done with classical music yet, and I still have a lot more I can learn from my teacher."  

 

Haters gonna hate!  Pooh on them!

[Jane in NC]

Hang in there, Susan!  My violin dd went through this, and it really stunk!  DePaul wasn't the school of her dreams at the time, and she was really struggling with it.  The teacher comments were so out of line.

 

Our story has a happy ending, and hopefully yours will too!  Dd is graduating in June, and she is continuing on at DePaul for grad school in violin performance.  She said, "I don't feel done with classical music yet, and I still have a lot more I can learn from my teacher."  

 

Haters gonna hate!  Pooh on them!

 

Beth, let me congratulate your daughter! I feel like our kids grew up together on these boards.

 

[Running the race]

My ds definitely will not be attending his first choice school. It is hard to say no due to finances, but he understands. He has a two visits this coming week. Hopefully, he will have a strong feeling one way or another. They are complete polar opposites.

[raptor_dad]

I assumed you raised pigs.  That it was associated with football or a university would NEVER EVER have occurred to me lol.

 

Nan

 

I must be one of the few people who got it from the start...

 

But then my MiL's custom lullaby for DW is based on the Arkansas fight song and the one for my SiL on the Iowa fight song.

 

So, DS also has a further derived Arkansas inspired lullaby among many others. With a shorter name you just get to add in more letter repetitions.

 

All very ironic since I don't follow college football and have never lived near either state and my MiL probably hasn't watch any sporting event since her college days. Ain't pop culture grand ;)

[Gwen in VA]

 

 

My ds definitely will not be attending his first choice school. It is hard to say no due to finances, but he understands. He has a two visits this coming week. Hopefully, he will have a strong feeling one way or another. They are complete polar opposites.

 

Running the Race -- I hope that your son is okay with not attending his first choice school and that he can make a decision between the other two quickly. It'll be nice when he can move on to celebrating where he is going rather than pondering his options and not-options.

[creekland]

:bigear: Dh likes to say that we live on the "mountain" of St Petersburg - 40ft above sea level.  That's a good thing if you have heard any of the news about flood insurance lately.  No waterfront property, but there will be a brand new guest bedroom come August... ;)

 

We do have a pool, but the heater is busted...

 

You live VERY near where friends of ours lived when we were here (18 - 23 years ago now!).  They knew they were our (and many of their other friends) evacuation place to go should a severe storm or hurricane threaten.  We all would have brought stuff and had a BIG party... fortunately, we never had to put the plan in motion.  Our house was a whopping 6 or 9 (can't remember) feet above sea level... not waterfront, just close to it in elevation!

 

I almost feel guilty posting this next part... For our Eckerd visit I booked a hotel in St Pete Beach since we love the water, but I booked a parking lot view to save $$ - esp since we'll be at the college for the bulk of the daylight hours today and will be checking out tomorrow (flying home right after their "day" concludes).  However, we got here yesterday and at check in found the hotel had upgraded us to one of their Penthouse Suites at no extra charge.  We gave up a balcony over the parking lot for floor to ceiling views of both the gulf and bay (on the other side of the spit of land, not Tampa Bay).  Yesterday we spent hours IN the room just enjoying looking out at it all - and we bought dinner from Publix to eat in too (WHY pay for an expensive restaurant - or fast food - with a view like this for free?).  I told youngest we just might drop him off at Eckerd and come back to our view... (he knows we're kidding).  I'm watching sunrise as we type feeling really lucky and thankful.

 

Oh, and we'll be tipping the maid... it's difficult to remove ALL the sand no matter how hard we try.  ;)

 

As a smaller perk... driving to the airport yesterday I passed a policeman in town and checked my speed.  Not speeding.  Good.  I then looked back up at the road to find the light ahead of me had just changed, but I was too close to it to stop, so ran it just after it turned red.  AND, he didn't even budge.  He must not have been looking as the police in this town are notorious for ANY infraction.

 

TWO blessings on one trip.  May our college visit be the third!

 

To those who can't financially afford their top choice(s)... I'll add my reminder that I couldn't either (back in the day when college was "cheap.")  I LOVED where I went and met hubby there.  In hindsight, I'd have changed NOTHING.  In the meantime for all of you... :grouphug: