How late do you keep your children out?

[Luanne]

How late in the day do you stay out shopping or whatever?  I know you may not get home at exactly the same time every time.  That is why I said "mostly".  This also may vary depending on the day of the week. 

 

I am just curious about this.  I have been surprised at how many people are still out shopping with young children when my daughter is getting off work at 10 pm.

[Dandelion]

We are mostly home before 8pm (generally much earlier than that).  Kids are 5 and 10 years old. 

[TheReader]

My youngest is 8, and as far as normal shopping and such goes, we're normally home by 10 at the latest. Usually earlier, but for example, if DH is running late getting home from work, we will likely go out to eat before going to the grocery store. So, while you'd see us at the store at 9:30 p.m. or so, we would have already eaten dinner, it's not a shower night, and it will be home and into jammies/teeth brushed, etc. 

 

We're a late night family, though; DH gets home from work around 6:30 or so, we eat dinner around 8:00-ish, and bedtime for all is about 10:30-ish on weeknights, midnight or so on weekends. We've never instituted an earlier bedtime for littler kids (long story, DH's wish), but as no one but DH has a "get-up" time that they must wake by each morning, this works for us. 

 

My 8 yr old does look younger than his age, so if you saw us out you'd think he was 5 or 6 at most. 

[AndyJoy]

When my son was under 2, we were often out until 10 pm.  He was a major night owl and rarely would fall asleep before 11:30 no matter what time we put him in bed.  When he was 18 mo. old we even went to Wal-mart at 10:30 one night specifically to buy a mini-trampoline to wear him out!  Now that his sleep issues are more under control, the latest we leave a store is 8:30 on a day when he napped, so he can be in bed by 9:00 pm.  On a normal night (with no nap) we are home by 7:45 pm.

 

 

[Tap]

Considering I have kids from 18 to 6yo my answer would vary too much to really vote.

 

Honestly though, there were many years when we running pretty late lives and was out at 10pm with my littles.  I am a night owl by nature.  We don't live in an area with horrendous crime and feel pretty safe out and about at night.  

[Scarlett]

When my ds was under age 8 or 9 I kept him to a fairly tight schedule even though we homeschool......he still needs his sleep, but if we are out late he sleeps in....I am the one who can't stay out too late!

[Dory]

Bedtime here is 7:30 - 8pm. I try and have the kids home by 7 so that we can have our normal bedtime routine. On weekends we might stay out till 8 and then the kids will be in bed around 9ish. I have found the kids function better if I stick to a strict bedtime routine. I would rather just keep the routine than fight with the kids through school. My oldest will have his bedtime moved to 8 -8:30 when he turns 10 which is in December. The older two get to read for an extra 30 min after they are in bed.

[DawnM]

Monday night is scout night.  We often get home after 10pm on those nights and have even when my youngest was 3 years old.  We just know that is a late night.

 

Otherwise, we are typically home by 8pm or so unless we happen to be out with friends.

 

Dawn

[LucyStoner]

 

 

I am just curious about this.  I have been surprised at how many people are still out shopping with young children when my daughter is getting off work at 10 pm.

 

 

I think this is more common when all adults in the house work, sometimes multiple jobs each, and do not have financial means that let them outsource their errands.  There are only so many hours in the day.  

[Desert Strawberry]

We are rarely out past 6pm. Our kids are generally tucked in by 7:30.

When we were students with one kid, we kept him out all night. He never slept anyway :p

now that same kid requires 12 hours of sleep. One of the reasons I like homeschooling, we don't have to cram everything into a few hours a day, and then wake them for the bus at 5am.

mine are 2, 4, 7, and 10.

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I think this is more common when all adults in the house work, sometimes multiple jobs each, and do not have financial means that let them outsource their errands.  There are only so many hours in the day.  

 

This. I see this a lot where we live. I've also thought that it might be a cultural thing, to a certain degree. DH's family is Latino, and I'm often surprised at how late I see kids in his family and his old neighborhood out and about with their parents. I have noticed that it tapers off as the kids get older (and school gets more serious, I imagine, and naps get outgrown). 

[Sobeknofret]

It depends on what's going on. On a regular day, we're all in by five. Dh gets home from work about then, and he's almost always too tired to go anywhere. If we *do* go out, we try to get home by 730. If we have baseball tickets...whenever the game ends!

[JudoMom]

How late in the day do you stay out shopping or whatever?  I know you may not get home at exactly the same time every time.  That is why I said "mostly".  This also may vary depending on the day of the week. 

 

I am just curious about this.  I have been surprised at how many people are still out shopping with young children when my daughter is getting off work at 10 pm.

 

We used to get dirty looks when we had the boys out that late when they were younger.  I remember once being pregnant with #3, so #1 & #2 were still toddlers, and we went to Home Depot at 10 or 11 and the cashier wasn't happy about it.  What the people giving us dirty looks didn't know is that at that point and time, dh worked odd hours so the boys stayed up late so we could spend time as a family.  If we kept the "correct and proper schedule", the boys would've missed time with Dad.  So we did what worked for us :).

 

[Joker]

During the week we're usually home by 8pm. It varies on the weekends and during holidays. Sometimes we're out till after midnight, other times we're home at the normal 8pm. My dds are 11 and 13, but it's been this way since they were really little.

[Um_2_4]

Normally in bed by 7:30-8. We do all wake up around 6am. We don't usually go out during the week. On the weekend we might go to a special event or something and then we might not get home till midnight. And everyone sleeps in of course the next am.

I do all shopping during the daytime. I prefer no crowds.

[LucyStoner]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes.  Do your kids get up very early?  Do you eat dinner very early?

 

We are sometimes still eating dinner at 7:30.  No way are my kids asleep by 7:30.  

[In the Rain]

I like to keep a regular bedtime routine, so our kids (9&11) rarely go out on errands after dinner time. There are special occasions, dinner with friends, or sometimes regular activities that keep us out later, but it isn't the norm. My kids just finished a week of camp that ended at 9:20. After showers and a snack, they weren't in bed until 10:30. It was worth it, but it wasn't a pretty week at our house.   :scared:

[redsquirrel]

My kids are 8 & 13 and we are home before 8pm.  They are generally in for the night by dinner time. Now, my 13 year old frequently has rehearsals that last until 9pm and that is obviously allowed. We have the occasional choir performance that goes late.

 

But, optional stuff like a shopping errand? Heck, I can't get my kids to go to the store with me in the middle of the day. I can't remember the last time my kids were in a grocery store or the mall. It was not willingly, I can tell you that. 

 

I will run errands at night etc, but they are home with their dad.

[Ravin]

We've had to impose a strict bedtime on DD to ensure she gets enough sleep as a measure to cope with behavior issues when she doesn't. She goes to bed between 7 and 8 PM currently. (She has to get up at 5 to get ready for camp). Once the school year starts we'll be able to make it later, as she won't have to get out of bed earlier than 7 or 7:30.

 

Going past bedtime more than once a week is a Very Bad Idea around here, especially if we want learning to happen.

 

For DS, however, he is still night nursing so often uninterested in going to bed before me. If he's really tired he will go down sooner, but most days when he's had a decent nap he goes to bed when I do (and almost always gets up when I do). Consequently, I more readily take him out with me if I have somewhere to be in the evening. Once he nightweans and is ready to give up daytime naps we will likely get more routine about his bedtime.

[Dory]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes.  Do your kids get up very early?  Do you eat dinner very early?

 

We are up at 6:30 - 7am. The kids all have the same routine every morning. Breakfast, clothes, teeth, bed making and room tidying, and then piano and outside chores (oldest ds first one piano and then youngest as my dd has the most outside chores). Then they start school. They are into the books by 8:30.

I worked super hard on that routine and now that they all have it down pat (it's basically habitual for them now), our morning go so smoothly it's awesome!

 

We eat supper by 5pm and the kids about an hour to play while I clean up dishes and then we head into the bedtime routine. Pick up toys, sweep floors, baths(one kid per day unless they got really dirty), read aloud, p.j.'s, teeth and tucking in.

 

The entire day in between those two routines can go completely crazy and the kids will still be settled and ok if the morning routine and bedtime routine stay basically the same. It gives them a sense of security I think and it takes some of the child chasing responsibility off my shoulders. If they know what to do, how to do it , and when, then I don't have to chase them every step of the way.

[Carrie12345]

We don't go out all that often during the week, so "usually" is tough for me. Unless we have something to do early in the morning (which I try to avoid) I don't really think about what time we should be home by.

[Mrs Mungo]

We are usually home by nine and my kids are twelve and up. Maybe a couple of times a month we are out later than that. 

 

I *have* had to drag my kids out in their PJs at 2 am for emergencies, especially when dh is gone.

 

People who keep unusual hours don't bother me. But, I am surprised at the number of people just lollygagging around, shopping and browsing with overtired, crying kids. DH and I were once at Target at 10:30 at night when the kids were at home. There was a guy pushing a baby in a cart, an older baby...maybe 15 months or so? They were browsing around the crockpots and stuff, so not on an emergency errand of some kind. The baby was crying and he was yelling at the baby, "Shut up! Stop crying!!" THAT is annoying.

[Guest]

My kids are not too little anymore, but even so, it would be unusual for us to be shopping or something like that after 9:00pm. When they were little-little, I was surprised to see folks with little kids at the grocery store (or whatever) at 10pm. I deduced that perhaps the parents' work schedule precludes them shopping earlier and this was their only option.

[klmama]

I've seen a lot of families with very young children at the grocery store late in the evening recently.  I was amazed at how cheerful all of the children were.  My guess is that they take long naps during the day. 

[Guest inoubliable]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes.  Do your kids get up very early?  Do you eat dinner very early?

 

I'm a little stumped on that, too. Eat at 6 pm? Done at 7 pm? 30 mins for bath, reading, cleaning up, bed? 

 

 

[Luanne]

It's ok with me if they are out that late shopping with their children, but I do have an issue with it when the kids are clearly tired and grumpy and the parent seems clueless as to why that is.  I've even heard them reprimanding the child for being grumpy.  Of course this also applies to the parents with small children in the restaurant at 1 pm and the child is clearly hungry and tired (ready for a nap) and the parent gets annoyed at the child.  My daughter was also a late to bed, late to rise child from a young age, but she was a happy shopper even at 9 pm.

[Χά�ων]

When DS was little we were out late. He didn't sleep until 1-2 in the morning and then slept 12 hours. Worked for us. I do see your point on tired little kids but I also understand that single parents working 2 jobs to keep and house the kids has to go to the store sometime.

 

 

Now we are up really early in the morning and are home and in bed by 9.

[plath]

When dd1 was small, she would rarely go to bed before 10 so no issues staying out late with her.  Now that she's 5 and dd2 is 2 1/2, bedtime is more regular and both girls go to bed at 8.  During soccer season it gets pushed back to 8:30 or at the latest 9. 

We eat dinner at 6:30, so some nights, it's dinner, clean up, pjs, brush teeth and bed.

I'm sure we'll all have a change in routine once the new baby is born though....  dh is oftentimes not home yet at bedtime, so things will change.

[Catwoman]

We have always been night owls, so being out at 10 or 11pm was never a big deal to us. Ds has always been perfectly happy to go to bed late and sleep late in the morning, so he still gets his rest.

 

Personally, I am always amazed when I hear about people taking the family out to breakfast at 6am, so I guess it's just a morning person vs night owl kind of thing. ;)

 

I do agree with Luanne, though -- it's different when a child is clearly exhausted and grumpy and the mom is strolling around Target looking at every little thing. If your child is really tired, shop for only what you really need and get the poor kid home!

[SKL]

We generally stay out as long as it takes, which can be pretty late since I'm a single mom working long hours.  I voted "10pm" because I took your question to mean most nights, but the nights we go out to eat and shop, 10pm would be more of an average.  We've been out to around midnight at times.  My kids are tough cookies.  :)  They are 6.

 

I should say we don't go shopping that often in the first place.  We do go out to dinner with friends most Fridays, and we stay out pretty late when we do that.  Last Friday we went to dinner around 8pm and then went shopping after that.  That's just the way we roll.

[KungFuPanda]

I think this is a surprising question from a homeschooler. Until my daughter entered public high school, we were always on 'California Time' except we live in MD :-) DH always set his own hours, and he's a night owl, so he often went in around 10 a.m. Our family schedule adjusted accordingly.

 

Some nights we were out so late that the only other kids out were Asian or Indian. Maybe it's cultural, but the AA and Cauc families seem to keep earlier hours.

 

I vote that if you can get away with an 8 p.m. dinner you WIN, especially if you're dining out. Clearly, I don't believe the clock is important. I believe in a consistent schedule, and getting enough sleep, but see NO good reason to get started at 5-6 a.m.

[Dory]

We have always been night owls, so being out at 10 or 11pm was never a big deal to us. Ds has always been perfectly happy to go to bed late and sleep late in the morning, so he still gets his rest.

 

Personally, I am always amazed when I hear about people taking the family out to breakfast at 6am, so I guess it's just a morning person vs night owl kind of thing. ;)

 

I do agree with Luanne, though -- it's different when a child is clearly exhausted and grumpy and the mom is strolling around Target looking at every little thing. If your child is really tired, shop for only what you really need and get the poor kid home!

 

Nope, definitely not a morning person here and neither are my youngest two. I still hate getting going in the morning, I know that if I push myself that I can get into that schedule though. The rest of the world around here works hard while there's daylight. Laying in bed wastes time that could be used. I was raised with the line of thinking that you sleep when it's dark and you work when the sun is up.That doesn't work perfectly up here, but that means that to make the most of the daylight we need to be in bed at an earlier hour.

Having the responsibility of the animals has helped to force us all into a early morning. That and my oldest son is a natural early riser.

Really, in the end, I don't think the time of day you go to bed and get up matter that much, so long as the kids have a healthy routine and are getting enough sleep. Whenever that sleep may be.

[Donna]

I never shop at night but have my kids out on weekends often until between 10-11pm because they like to hang out in pubs playing Irish music. They spent a week at camp and neither my 11 or 15yo went to bed before 1am. A regular week night, not in the summer, they are usually home by 10pm...late due to wrestling practices or matches. My kids are night owls and always have been.

[redsquirrel]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes.  Do your kids get up very early?  Do you eat dinner very early?

 

It isn't difficult. We eat dinner around 6ish. That doesn't take long at all. Eating only takes, what...20 mins? Then the kids maybe take a shower and DH and I pick up dinner. Then tooth brushing at 7:14 and upstairs at 7:30. Now that it is summer my 8 year old is up until 8, but in his room by 7:30. During the school year he was in his room by 7 and lights out by 7:30.

 

My 13 year old is generally upstairs in his room for the night by 8. Maybe 8:15 at the latest. Now, I he's got his audio books, his itouch with netflix, his books and his writing notebooks so I am not actually sure when he goes to sleep. But, both kids are in their rooms by 8pm most nights.

 

I have no idea what time the boys get up in the morning. After me is all I know.

[Mommy22alyns]

Unless it's some kind of special event (say, baseball game and fireworks), we're generally home by 8.  However, starting in a couple of weeks, Rebecca and DH won't be back home until closer to 9 due to her practices.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

We rarely go out at night, however the few times we have the kids have been better behaved than during the day...hmm.

[jeninok]

DH isn't home until 630 most nights, and sometimes 8 or 9 for stretches of time so we have always kept somewhat later hours.   These lazy days of summer have meant way too many very very late nights with sleepovers, or DS playing xbox live with his BFF that lives in Nebraska. 

 

My goal for the school year is to have him in bed by between 930 and 10 on weekdays, and he can read or listen to an audio book.   We get up around 830, so it is plenty of sleep.

[Desert Strawberry]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes.  Do your kids get up very early?  Do you eat dinner very early?

 

Only the little ones go to bed at 7:30. The oldest stays up reading. 

 

DH is off early, usually home around 5. I have dinner waiting or close to ready. We sit down about 5:30, finished by 6:30. Baths are already done for at least half the kids. A little time with dad, and it's lights out. 

 

I work out in the evening. DH needs alone time. Even after clean up and exercise, I'm in bed by 9:30. 

 

We get up about 6:30 or 7am. Not super early. 

[PeacefulChaos]

It is rare that I'd go shopping at night.  I'd have no qualms about bringing my kids at any time if I wanted to go or had to go.  They don't have to be up by a certain time usually.

 

This pretty much sums us up.

 

I do go out by myself usually after dinner, for errands or whatever.  I'm one of those people who likes to find reasons to leave the house lol... and I go by myself not because of the kids' bedtimes, but just because it's by myself!!!  :lol:

[amo_mea_filiis.]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes. Do your kids get up very early? Do you eat dinner very early?

Yes and yes.

 

Ds gets up between 6-7. We eat at 5. He goes to bed at 6 (quick shower, meds, read, tuck in and done at 6:30).

[OrganicAnn]

We are home just about every night at dinner at 6:30 and don't really go out after that except for some special occasion like a movie on the weekend.  

[twoxcell]

During the school year we put the kids to bed by 9 for the most part so wouldn't really be out shopping past 9. During the summer we really don't have a set bed time and on occasion will be out shopping as late as 10 or so with the kids. We do all our grocery shopping together as a family so we wait for my dh to get off. Last Friday was one of our big grocery shopping trips and we didn't leave the last store until almost 10. ;) I really don't see a problem with it as long as peoples kids aren't going nuts or crying because they are too tired. I prefer shopping in the evening because the stores are less crowded.

[Amy in NH]

I chose other.  We stay out as late we need to.  Sometimes, but not often, it is past 11pm.  We live a good 2 hours from friends, family, and major shopping, so that's just the way it works around here.

[Amy in NH]

Nope, definitely not a morning person here and neither are my youngest two. I still hate getting going in the morning, I know that if I push myself that I can get into that schedule though. The rest of the world around here works hard while there's daylight. Laying in bed wastes time that could be used. I was raised with the line of thinking that you sleep when it's dark and you work when the sun is up.That doesn't work perfectly up here, but that means that to make the most of the daylight we need to be in bed at an earlier hour.

Having the responsibility of the animals has helped to force us all into a early morning. That and my oldest son is a natural early riser.

Really, in the end, I don't think the time of day you go to bed and get up matter that much, so long as the kids have a healthy routine and are getting enough sleep. Whenever that sleep may be.

 

It's not a waste of time if you are using the awake time at night in a productive manner.  Being a night owl and sleeping during the day does not mean you are lazy; it means your biological clock is set differently.  There are plenty of people who work night jobs and their work ethic is not any worse than those who work during the day.  I know a farmer down the street who milks from 9-12 am and pm.  We have our livestock on a similar schedule because that's what works for us.  So long as we are consistent it is not any worse for them than an earlier schedule.

 

You might want to check out this book review about chronotypes.

[twoxcell]

 

We have no shopping open after 9 here! However, we're often up later at home.

Really? Two of our big stores are open 24 hours and most of the others are open way past 9 except for tiny stores and we live in a small town. I thought it was so odd when Costco came to town and saw that they close so early.

[Dory]

It's not a waste of time if you are using the awake time at night in a productive manner.  Being a night owl and sleeping during the day does not mean you are lazy; it means your biological clock is set differently.  There are plenty of people who work night jobs and their work ethic is not any worse than those who work during the day.  I know a farmer down the street who milks from 9-12 am and pm.  We have our livestock on a similar schedule because that's what works for us.  So long as we are consistent it is not any worse for them than an earlier schedule.

 

You might want to check out this book review about chronotypes.

 

Wasn't trying to insinuate that people were lazy if they were on a different routine. Sorry about that. With our cow in with the calf half the time. Their natural clock has the calf eating about 6ish and it's best if we separate just after. We tried to put her on a different schedule, but we get more milk if we milk earlier and separate earlier. She'll still milk just fine on another schedule, I just like having the extra for cheese.

When my brother was with us, as a teenager I fully expected that he needed more sleep than I did, and was on a little different biological clock than I was. Weekends he slept in till past noon and that was fine and would stay out at crazy hours at first but quickly realized that returning to a work week was brutal if he strayed too far the normal schedule. In order to get up when he needed to, he needed to go to bed before I did, as he needed more sleep than I did. That's fine, that's the way he worked. I work outside a lot, as do many people around here, pushing my most productive hours into after daylight time, wouldn't do me much good in the long run. I really don't want to be working outside after dark. I want all the animals and myself tucked in safe so the outside stuff has to be done by sunset.

[Parrothead]

When dd was little I ran a very tight ship and she was in bed my 7p 99% of the time. Then we moved to places where the streets were rolled up by 9p. Now I have no qualms about her being out late if we have some place to be.

[kiwik]

I don't know how you people pull off 7:30 bedtimes. Do your kids get up very early? Do you eat dinner very early?

Ds6 gets up 6 to 7 no matter what time he goes to bed. He goes to bed at 7 and is asleep within 10 mins. Ds4 goes to bed at the same time but takes longer to get to sleep.and wakes a bit later. I need to be out of the house at 8 15 4 or 5 days a week.

 

they eat at 5.30 or 6. I sometimes eat with them sometimes not. I am a single working mother and I need a couple of hours peace in the evening to do all the stuff I can't do the rest of the time. Sometimes we do WWE or the verbal math Lawson or readings over tea time.

[sewingmama]

We live in the country...so it's not unusual for us to get home late. That being said we have usually left the shops by 8pm the latest. The kids sleep in the car on the way home. I don't judge people who are out later though....you never know why they are there. Maybe they can't get a babysitter and its the only time they can shop. Maybe it's the first time they have kept their kids out late and they usually have them in bed by 7 every night. Who knows.

 

When I lived in Korea it was normal to see young kids out at 10 pm. The parents would eat at a restaurant after work and the kids would sleep on the floor beside them. Heck...my last English class ended at 9pm and that was for 10 year olds. Typically they didn't eat dinner till they went home and then still had homework to do. Most didn't go to bed till midnight.

 

I don't think keeping your kids out late equals bad parents. Although I think it might equal stupid parents because I wouldn't want to be dealing with getting those kids up for school the next morning lol.

[Luanne]

I think this is a surprising question from a homeschooler. Until my daughter entered public high school, we were always on 'California Time' except we live in MD :-) DH always set his own hours, and he's a night owl, so he often went in around 10 a.m. Our family schedule adjusted accordingly.

 

Some nights we were out so late that the only other kids out were Asian or Indian. Maybe it's cultural, but the AA and Cauc families seem to keep earlier hours.

 

I vote that if you can get away with an 8 p.m. dinner you WIN, especially if you're dining out. Clearly, I don't believe the clock is important. I believe in a consistent schedule, and getting enough sleep, but see NO good reason to get started at 5-6 a.m.

 

If all the people I see out and about late at night were homeschoolers as well, your post would make more sense.  This isn't just during the summer either.  I see them with young elementary kids out past ten on school nights and I seriously doubt they are all homeschooling as well.