teachermom2834 Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 While vacationing in Gulf Shores last week we took the opportunity to check out Spring Hill College in Mobile. It's a small Jesuit college. DS is only 15 so it is very preliminary but I had come across the school while looking for Catholic colleges. I figured we'd check it out while we were in the area. Ds is familiar with our local big state U so I thought it would be good for him to see another type of campus. It was a lovely tour. The guide obviously loves his school. He told us all about the academics, sports, social activities, local areas of interest, etc. About halfway through the tour another mom on the tour asked "so what do the students DO?" The tour guide repeated all the activities sponsored by the campus, etc. At the very end of the tour the same mom said again " I just have to ask you again. Where do they party? I mean, I don't understand. Where do they go to party?" Just goes to show everyone is looking for something different. I was thinking that the lack of frat houses was a positive :) And I'm pretty sure the students that want to can always find a party! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erin Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 I went to a small rural college in western Nebraska. There were no frats or sororities. There was, however, a rodeo team. If you know what that means, you know there were no lack of parties... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbara H Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 That mom may well be looking for the party... but I will say this is a question I often ask as I visit colleges. I ask it because just asking "what do students do on the weekend?" typically generates the party line kind of answer about campus activities and studying. I find "where do students party?" often gets me closer to finding out about the party culture on campus. I've gotten answers like "there are parties every Friday and Saturday night in the frats and half of campus is there." So, it can be a good question! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teachermom2834 Posted July 21, 2013 Author Share Posted July 21, 2013 Oh...I know the question makes sense. It clearly was coming out of frustration from this mom thinking the campus was so boring. It was her body language through the whole thing and that those were the only two questions she asked on the entire tour. It was that it seemed like her only concern and that she really was trying to make sure there is enough of a party for her kid. I know plenty of parents who do include partying as an important part of the college experience so it wasn't that surprising to me...but I think it was a little bit to my kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plansrme Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 So what did the guide say? Where DO they party? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbara H Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 It was that it seemed like her only concern and that she really was trying to make sure there is enough of a party for her kid. I wonder if the kid shares the same priorities. It is a bit awkward when parents get very intently focused on asking a ton of questions that their kids don't really care about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teachermom2834 Posted July 21, 2013 Author Share Posted July 21, 2013 So what did the guide say? Where DO they party? The guide gave the "of course college kids are always going to party but our students are very responsible and everyone lives on campus so they don't have to worry about getting home" I have the impression that partying happens right on campus, in dorms. It is not a dry campus. I wonder if the kid shares the same priorities. It is a bit awkward when parents get very intently focused on asking a ton of questions that their kids don't really care about. Sure. I could totally have misread the situation. The impression was that the worry was that her kid would miss out on the party scene at this college but I could be misjudging completely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 Hmmm...well, we had a similar experience when touring a nursing department of a small university. The mother repeatedly asked, and it was the ONLY question she asked the entire day, "How many girls meet their husband here?" The father asked, "What percentage of girls are engaged by their senior year?" This was not something the admission's department or the student tour guide could answer which made them quite frustrated. This, while their daughter meekly followed behind them asking nothing and showing no interest in anything. It was very clear they were sending her to school for her M.R.S. degree and not for education. Truly, I've never seen a more disengaged pair in the academic aspects than those parents. At one stop near the dorms, they made a spectacle of pointing out boys to their daughter. Sheesh...poor girl! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candid Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 Hmmm...well, we had a similar experience when touring a nursing department of a small university. The mother repeatedly asked, and it was the ONLY question she asked the entire day, "How many girls meet their husband here?" The father asked, "What percentage of girl's are engaged by their senior year?" This was not something the admission's department or the student tour guide could answer which made them quite frustrated. This, while their daughter meekly followed behind them asking nothing and showing no interest in anything. It was very clear they were sending her to school for her M.R.S. degree and not for education. Truly, I've never seen a more disengaged pair in the academic aspects than those parents. At one stop near the dorms, they made a spectacle of pointing out boys to their daughter. Sheesh...poor girl! In http://www.amazon.com/Sex-Soul-Juggling-Sexuality-Spirituality/dp/B0071UMPI2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1374441784&sr=8-1&keywords=sex+and+the+soul Freitas, discusses a common rhyme used by women at Christian schools: "Ring for the Spring or free." Meaning if you aren't engaged by your senior spring semester, you get tuition free. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbara H Posted July 21, 2013 Share Posted July 21, 2013 Sure. I could totally have misread the situation. The impression was that the worry was that her kid would miss out on the party scene at this college but I could be misjudging completely. Oh, just to be clear, I'm not at all saying you misread it! Mom clearly doesn't want her kid to miss out his right to party. I was just relating that sometimes feel for the kids on tours when the parent picks whatever issue (whether it is suite style dorms, the hours of the library, or whatever) and you can see it is a deal breaker for the parent and it is really not an issue of importance to the student. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in MN Posted July 23, 2013 Share Posted July 23, 2013 I must be a fuddy-duddy. I would have been (silently) appalled at such a question. A college is an educational institution. And mixing parties and newly emancipated young adults seem like begging for incredible possibilities of danger for kids, and an unimaginable waste of money for families. In college, I lived in a shared rental house, and plenty of my roommates were escaping from dorms and sororities, because they actually wanted to study! I wonder how else one could ask and get a truthful answer without implying that one was a parent demanding a partying scene? Julie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen in VA Posted July 24, 2013 Share Posted July 24, 2013 A different perspective -- the question "where do they party" may be a genuine one. Kids in college will get together and hang out and drink. Do they do that at a bar downtown, at off-campuses party houses, in dorms, at a student center, or.....? The answer can indicate a lot about the life on campus! The question may have been a genuine search for more info about campus life and not a demand that their kid be provided with opportunities to party. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sebastian (a lady) Posted July 24, 2013 Share Posted July 24, 2013 A different perspective -- the question "where do they party" may be a genuine one. Kids in college will get together and hang out and drink. Do they do that at a bar downtown, at off-campuses party houses, in dorms, at a student center, or.....? The answer can indicate a lot about the life on campus! The question may have been a genuine search for more info about campus life and not a demand that their kid be provided with opportunities to party. I was thinking something similar. The campus tour we did in June made a point of mentioning concerts, plays, midnight pizza parties and laser tag or bumper car events as well as showing off the rec facilities which include a nice pool/water park and a climbing wall. I think they made the point that there was fun to be had and ways to blow off steam. Given some recent events at another school involving intoxication, a "football house" and rape charges; I'd very much like to know about the party scene at a school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted July 30, 2013 Share Posted July 30, 2013 I have been on a number of college tours and never had a parent ask either about partying or about men for her daughter to marry or marriage rates. I would have thought both questions equally odd for parents. Being that this is Alabama, and yes, I do live here, I would not be surprised if the woman didn't want her kid to miss out on partying. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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