Tap Posted July 11, 2013 Share Posted July 11, 2013 DD6 had a great day at daycare (I work outside the home) then I picked her up. They had a special activity today and went to trampoline park at daycare. I don't like her going there, but it was a group activity and she was so excited so I let her go. It has all been down hill from there. :0/ We are hugely blessed to have 2 girls across the street that play with my dd every day. They get along great and since the father has a sibling on the spectrum...the parents and girls understand my dd and are Hugely forgiving of her issues. The only thing that makes life bearable for dd6 in the evening is having these girls who love to play outside as much as she does. Today, after daycare. she wanted to come home and play in the water with the girls but she had BT. She fussed but then we decided to stop and take a drink with her to share with her BT and she liked that idea, so she came around. BT was fine. Then we came home to find her two buddies family heading to the lake to swim (one of her favorite things to do) without her. HUGE tantrum. At least and hour. Throwing/kicking walls/back talking etc. She finally calmed down. At first she was fussing because she wanted to go...then she realized that she had no one to play with, and she started in again. I needed to drive sister to the church 5 minutes away...mid size tantrum, finally got over it when I said she could take her snack in the care with her. We have a no trampoline rule and while a kid down the street has one, It hasn't been an issue more than half a dozen times because they live outsider her boundaries. But now....the family of the girls who she plays with....were given a trampoline today. Of all days, it has to be today, when I just let her jump on a trampoline. :0/ Now it will be an issue EVERY stinken Day! DD loves to jump and jumps on the trampoline with a harness at gymnastics (just a rec/fun class). DD6 is prone to getting hurt and I know the mom will not be supervising the kids. Good parent--respectful/responsible kids, just not a helicopter parent. DD has boundary issues, aggression issues, and isn't always aware of the world around her...unsupervised trampolines are not a good fit. Please understand, this isn't something I can just put rules around and call it safe. I swear I think she thinks that the words 'rules' and 'chaos' mean the same to her. She is not a rule loving Aspie...she is and "I only recognize myself and my desires' Aspie. We have a no trampoline rule because older dd14 has a permanent shoulder injury from a simple fall on a trampoline many years back. She slipped when coming down from a bounce, arms were forcibly overextended behind her. xrays, MRI, Physical Therapy, sports doctors and DD14 still has to sling it a couple times per year due to pain. It had definitely limited the things she can do (she will end up in sever pain if she extends her arm behind her body much at all...ie can't throw a ball). 4 years later and dd is now asking to go back to PT again because it has been bothering her that much. We have easily spent well over $1000 for her shoulder and adding back on PT will raise that again. I don't really know why I am typing all this out. I don't know if it is a JAWM or if I really want advice. Just help me think this through..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebecca VA Posted July 11, 2013 Share Posted July 11, 2013 Can you put up some equipment or other enticement that will lure the kids over to your house? Maybe a zip-wire, or a homemade rock-climbing wall, or something? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted July 11, 2013 Share Posted July 11, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted July 11, 2013 Author Share Posted July 11, 2013 Can you put up some equipment or other enticement that will lure the kids over to your house? Maybe a zip-wire, or a homemade rock-climbing wall, or something? Small yards. We are the ones with the Rainbow Play structure, Teather ball, soccer nets and allow the kids to have an inflatable pool most of the summer (we drain it daily so it isn't always available). We have been 'the yard' for the past few years. Infact I think the girls parents were mentioning that they wanted to make the back yard more kid friendly....I didn't know that meant trampoline. I don't think they did either, It was a spontaneous gift from a neighbor. LOL oh the irony. I just realized it is the exact tramp that dd14 got hurt on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celticmom Posted July 11, 2013 Share Posted July 11, 2013 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dandelion Posted July 11, 2013 Share Posted July 11, 2013 She is not a rule loving Aspie...she is and "I only recognize myself and my desires' Aspie. I also have an Aspie like this. :grouphug: Rules don't mean anything to him. To help you think this through: - What usually helps your DD feel better about something she can't have or do? - What other activities does your DD like to participate in with the neighbor girls? Can the girls come over to your house (away from the trampoline) and spend time with your DD there? - Would you be able to supervise some time on the trampoline a couple times a week at the neighbors? Would your DD be responsive and follow the "no trampoline" rule on off days if she knew she would get "trampoline time" on certain other days? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlessedMom Posted July 11, 2013 Share Posted July 11, 2013 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heartsjoy Posted July 12, 2013 Share Posted July 12, 2013 like a previous poster. What could be at your house that the other girls would want to do? A single person swing on a bungy cord? Giant hop balls in the house? Permission to dig giant mud holes in the backyard? Making whole room tents in your living room with all available chairs and all the sheets and pillows? I'm with you on the it's not helicopter parenting, my sister asked if I ever got a moment off duty in a group setting? answer NO. No one else can process and read my child and prevent serious injury to my child or others. No one else can put all the pieces together and help my child process what they need to do differently. I've allowed things at my house I never thought I would because I'm the one having to supervise, and it's how to get other kids here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SJ. Posted July 12, 2013 Share Posted July 12, 2013 I'm sorry you have had a rough day :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilaclady Posted July 12, 2013 Share Posted July 12, 2013 I was wondering if she can use an harness on that trampoline since you said she uses one at the gym. Will that work to reduce the likelihood of injury? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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