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Standing in line


Eagle

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I remember sometime last year reading a thread here about how a main thing taught in elementary school that isn't a focus in homeschooling is the skill of waiting in line. Apparently kids do a lot of lining up for things in school and are very proficient at it. When I read the thread I chuckled and thought it was a bit silly -- it's a line, how much instruction is needed?

 

Yesterday we were at the pool and the waterslide was open. Ds COULD NOT stand in line. He was so excited he was hopping all over the place. All the other kids managed to show their excitement while remaining in their spot. Ds didn't appear to get the concept at all. I had to keep calling him over to stand beside me.

 

Then he went to line up for the diving board. This time I wasn't in line as I waited for him in the water. We had a little chat about lining up and how he had to stay in line. So he walks over to the line and stands beside it. (Insert headbang smiley here!) He stayed rooted to the spot even when the line moved. Fortunately the nice person that got into line after him called ds over to the diving board when it was his turn.

 

The next time he got to the diving board at the same time as another boy. The lineup was gone and the other boy motioned for ds to go first. Ds jumped off the board and quickly got back to the start. Then the other boy jumped. Ds could have then jumped again right away as he was already there, but instead waited 2-3 minutes for the boy to slowly swim to the edge, get out and get back to the board. It turns out ds had waited so he could tell the other boy to go ahead. It was cute that he waited so he could take turns, but it highlighted even further that he just doesn't quite get the whole line thing.

 

Is anyone else's child lineup-challenged?

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My kids get the idea behind standing in line, but not the "everyone mob the line and pretend to stand off to the side so you can eventually cut your way in and get your friends up there, too" thing. Assertiveness, aggressiveness, whatever it is. We always end up last in line because we're not as rehearsed at the apparently acceptable social battle thing as other families, I guess.

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My kids are fine at standing in line. We have to do it for many things we do everyday like shopping, library, museums, zoo, etc. They don't always stand perfectly still and patient, but they understand taking turns and not pushing to the front. There are plenty of public and private school children that aren't good at standing in line, so I don't think that your schooling choice is the only factor. Just the other day my niece and nephew kept pushing to the front of the line and crowding out my son and other nephew that were waiting patiently. I was actually pleasantly surprised that my son was using his manners.

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Yep. My kids were admonished by their cousin for not getting in line when they were washing hands before dinner a few years ago. "Why aren't you lining up?!" she demanded.  My kids just shrugged and said, "I don't know".

 

I've also noticed we don't have the required skills to get freebies, as in, "Hey, kids, we're giving away xyz! Come and get it!" They become overwhelmed at such cattle calls and let everyone scoot in ahead of them.  I've even heard them utter, "Excuse me" when someone bumps into them in they fray :) .

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My kids are fine at standing in line. We have to do it for many things we do everyday like shopping, library, museums, zoo, etc. They don't always stand perfectly still and patient, but they understand taking turns and not pushing to the front. There are plenty of public and private school children that aren't good at standing in line, so I don't think that your schooling choice is the only factor. Just the other day my niece and nephew kept pushing to the front of the line and crowding out my son and other nephew that were waiting patiently. I was actually pleasantly surprised that my son was using his manners.

 

 

Yeah how does one get through life without having lots of practice doing this even without school?  My kids have no trouble with lines either.

 

That said, there are some adults who seem to have problems standing in lines.

 

 

I don't think it's necessarily an issue of not knowing how to stand in line, at least for my kids.  In their case, they don't have the natural propensity for queuing up.  They didn't understand why there had to be a *line* when they were all going to sink to wash their hands.  They've just been confused by kids that expect to queue up for everything.  They understand lines. They've been to Disney :) .

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In our homeschool group, we used to joke that school kids stand in line ... homeschoolers clump.  My kids can stand in line, but they don't seem to understand the intricacies of keeping appropriate space with the person in front of them.  When the line moves, they don't move up enough and it annoys other people behind them.  I STILL have to remind them.  I think College Boy has it figured out by now since he has to stand in line at the cafeteria 3 times a day.  But the other ones are still "line challenged." 

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There's way more places to stand in line than just at school.   Lots of opportunities, which we've all had in life, so I won't list out.  

 

That being said, having spent an hour a week in a public school this last year, sitting in the main area, while DS was in speech therapy, and it happened to be lunch time for the PS children, so alot of activity in the area, I see where they are in lines all day long, every day, so yes, it probably is a very practiced habit, and comes without thinking anymore.  They are in line in the walk to the lunch room, and yes, spaced out as evenly as possible.  They are in line as they leave the lunch room to go to the bathroom.  They are in line as they go outside to the playground.  They are in line as they come in from the playground.  They are in line as they walk to the library. They are in line as they walk back to class.  So yes, in line all day.   Sheep.  

 

My children understand the concept of standing in line.   Perhaps some children are better at it than others.  My oldest DS, because he has always been that nice, shy boy, was always horrible about the line thing.   Would be at the back of a line FOREVER as people walked past him, walked around him, cut in front of him.   This is a boy who went to daycare at 10week and did that "mainstream" school through K5....so stood in line every day from toddlerhood/preschool/K5.  My middle DS, is naturally assertive, even a bit aggressive, has never been in a school setting, and no ones cuts in front of him, he's not having that, not even his brother (yes, a bit of a character issue, we are working on :). He "gets" that standing in line is how you eventually get to the front, and that's always his goal, be in the front. 

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Can we extrapolate on this?  How come Chinese kids (in China) know how to stand in line in school, but throw all caution to the wind when they are boarding trains (in China), buying food etc.

 

;)

 Oh yes, this is precisely what I wondered when I read this discussion! Well, different setting (school vs. train station), different rules for lines? I remember the first time I stood in line for a bathroom in China. Colossal fail on my part. I did not get the bathroom line rules at all. But those rules are different than the lines for buses, trains, or shops in China, IME.

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Oh yes, this is precisely what I wondered when I read this discussion! Well, different setting (school vs. train station), different rules for lines? I remember the first time I stood in line for a bathroom in China. Colossal fail on my part. I did not get the bathroom line rules at all. But those rules are different than the lines for buses, trains, or shops in China, IME.

:) This whole thread has me chuckling.

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Can we extrapolate on this?  How come Chinese kids (in China) know how to stand in line in school, but throw all caution to the wind when they are boarding trains (in China), buying food etc.

 

;)

I think it's a reaction to scarcity. Certainly when I first lived in China in 1985, resources (food, the best place to squat on the floor in a train) were very scarce and so desperation overcame rules. I would guess that the mobbing of trains, etc. then became culturally acceptable.

 

At the provincial airport I used frequently from 2004 - 2008 the line discipline at check-in, security, etc. wasn't too bad - everyone in the line had a ticket and was guaranteed a seat so I would guess that mobbing had never been necessary.

 

Oh, and school teachers in China carry sticks.

 

L

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I am very adhd (official, card carrying, have the tshirt) and standing in line is torture for me.  Everyone seems soooo slowwwww.  It's the way my brain is wired.   I manage by having something else with me, like a book, kindle, headphones, etc.  I went to school; it didn't help, but I know this is a unique, brain-chemistry kind of scenario. 

 

I tend to be the early bird who gets to venues to avoid lines, or the first one in a lesson, or the one to sign up early. 

 

I wouldn't like my kids lining up all day, 5 days a week, for classes.  It just reminds me of "Another Brick in the Wall."  Though I do think it is something we all must do sometimes.

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When I go to any customer service desk at big box stores, I honestly rethink the idea that public schoolers learned how to stand in a line. There's always that passive aggressive person that is supposed to be behind the line that stands off to the side as if they would take the opportunity to jump ahead if someone stops paying attention. It's awkward and annoying.

 

My kids get the concept of waiting in line. We've been to Disney World. 😉 problem solved.

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My kids did go to a couple of years of preschool, where they stood in line a couple of times a day despite only 10-12 kids per class. We also have the usual standing in line at the store, church activities, library, Disney, etc. which they handle very well.

 

They fight over who gets to be the "line leader" at our front door every time we leave the house.

 

Nope, no problem understanding lines here. :p

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My kids, always homeschooled, have done fine with waiting in line. They might not have liked it, maybe got impatient, but handled it without issues. It's their mom, 12 years of schooling with lines, who has major problems with waiting in line. I have been known to walk away if the line is too long. Waiting in line is my personal purgatory.

 

In my very limited experience, it has little to do with being homeschooled.

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When I go to any customer service desk at big box stores, I honestly rethink the idea that public schoolers learned how to stand in a line. There's always that passive aggressive person that is supposed to be behind the line that stands off to the side as if they would take the opportunity to jump ahead if someone stops paying attention. It's awkward and annoying.

ed.

That has more to do with the special snowflake "my time is more important than anyone else's" syndrome--like when people see a merge sign but stay in the lane as long as possible so the cars at the front of the line will have to let them in.
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It's funny, but the opposite seemed to be true with my kids. That is, I tried to teach them to be patient and and kind and let others go first, etc. etc., but then when they got into a big crowd where they were supposed to stand in lines, they were sometimes the only ones waiting in line and the other kids would be in a mob pushing their way to the front. I had to tell my kids that sometimes in order to get a turn, they actually have to not worry about lines and be a little pushy. :)

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