Do you "share" pool toys

[Excelsior! Academy]

See poll.

 

 

 

Eta: Our pool doesn't have community toys. We bring water guns, noodles, and floaties. Many kids seem to "borrow" without any thought to the owners. I wasn't sure if my quiet annoyance was realistic or if I was not understanding community pool etiquette.

[*Lulu*]

Other

 

You should not take toys you are not willing to share to a group environment.

(The exception being comfort item type toys or a specific favorite of a child too young to understand sharing.)

 

If the toys are laying around the pool, unused, they would look like fair game.

 

I would expect my kids to ask before playing with toys that looked as though they belonged to another child.

 

I would not expect someone to take toys from a bag sitting away from the pool.

[MolleenCarie]

Usually most of the toys belong to the pool. When kids or parents want their personal toys back, they just ask. Then everyone knows those are off-limits.

[Mrs Mungo]

Other

 

You should not take toys you are not willing to share to a group environment.

(The exception being comfort item type toys or a specific favorite of a child too young to understand sharing.)

 

If the toys are laying around the pool, unused, they would look like fair game.

 

I would expect my kids to ask before playing with toys that looked as though they belonged to another child.

 

I would not expect someone to take toys from a bag sitting away from the pool.

 

I agree, but I still voted no because I wouldn't expect and would disallow my kids to play with other people's pool toys without asking.

 

eta: I do agree that some pools have noodles, kickboards, dive rings, etc for community use, therefore it might be a bit hard to distinguish.

[SJ.]

No, I would not expect my boys to share toys with children they do not know or are not at the pool to visit nor do I allow my boys to play with toys that are not at the moment being used while at the pool (that are not ours, obviously).

 

If we are meeting friends I always tell the boys not to bring toys they are not willing to share.

 

ETA: The pool I attend does not have community toys.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Nope. At our Y, everyone brings their own toys. If we are playing a game with a toy that can involve more than one person, someone can ask to join the game. Otherwise, keep your mitts off our noodles and dive toys! (But this is the culture of this particular pool. If we went to a pool or a park with a different kind of dynamic then we would match it.)

[bettyandbob]

I cannot believe I or my child should be compelled to share his rings or his toypedo. If he wants to share he will share. Bring your d.... toys. There are no toys that stay at the pool so, if you know your kid will want to play with a toy bring your own. If someone invites your child to play with a game with his own toys, then your child can play with someone else's toys. IME when kids have asked to share my ds's toys, those kids do not actually want to just play with the toys not my ds and as I've learned ds, who has disabilities, does understand that these children don't actually want to play with him. He now has some friends who do play with him and he shares his toys with him.

 

I live in a community with several pools available. People do not have backyard pools, so there would be no where else to use our pool toys.

 

When you go to the neighborhood ball court are you expected to share your basketball. When you are at the local fields, do others get to use your soccer ball. If you have a bottle of bubble stuff at the playground, do you have to share that.

[Mrs Mungo]

When you go to the neighborhood ball court are you expected to share your basketball. When you are at the local fields, do others get to use your soccer ball. If you have a bottle of bubble stuff at the playground, do you have to share that.

 

 

Generally my kids share bubbles, soccer balls, etc.

[Pamela H in Texas]

If a toy was lying on the side of the pool, I wouldn't let my kid just take it. Same with just floating. Oh, and my kids can't ask for it it either. You ask your sibling if you can play for something, not a random stranger. Their stuff is theirs. If it was offered or my kid was playing with the children who brought it, that would be different.

 

However, we would let anyone play with toys we brought assuming they are playing with us. If they moved on with them, I'd probably be a little annoyed; but I wouldn't say anything until my kid would like his toy back. At that point, I think it is reasonable that a kid not playing with us give us the toy we'd like to play with since it *is* our toy.

 

Really, we go so early in the morning, there is rarely more than two other families there.

[bettyandbob]

 

Generally my kids share bubbles, soccer balls, etc.

 

 

 

My experience with my oldest child who had serious motor skills issues as a young child and my youngest who has obvious lifelong disabilities is having other children see we brought something nice, ask to join and then take off with it. If my experience were with children who played cooperatively and not in some bullying fashion, I might share. My middle child does play cooperatively and has always had above average athletic skills so she was often invited to join various playground or pool games, but she could hold her own and so in that situation it would work out. If kids are unevenly skilled the more advanced child will often get bored playing with the less advanced and often that's where trouble starts.

[Mrs Mungo]

 

 

My experience with my oldest child who had serious motor skills issues as a young child and my youngest who has obvious lifelong disabilities is having other children see we brought something nice, ask to join and then take off with it. If my experience were with children who played cooperatively and not in some bullying fashion, I might share. My middle child does play cooperatively and has always had above average athletic skills so she was often invited to join various playground or pool games, but she could hold her own and so in that situation it would work out. If kids are unevenly skilled the more advanced child will often get bored playing with the less advanced and often that's where trouble starts.

 

 

I wasn't judging your situation. I understand every situation was different. I was just answering the question. :)

[Alice]

At our pool, everyone brings baby pool toys and just leaves them there for the summer. Those are pretty much free game. Occasionally someone will bring something more special that they want to bring home. If they leave it by the side of the baby pool, it will get played with as it’s pretty much impossible for someone to tell if it’s communal or special. But noone gets upset if the kid then comes and says “hey, I need to go home can I have my x back.†In the bigger pool most people keep their own toys to themselves. If there were toys lying by the side of the pool I’d ask before letting my kids play with them. I don’t think people have to share but it is nice when someone does.

[T'smom]

We take toys and share with everyone, BUT I do not let my kids play with other kids' toys unless the other child offers. ( I don't let them ask) My kids will play with pretty much anyone at the pool, but they are pretty young.

[GSOchristie]

I make my kids ask, but I share freely, everything except goggles. I stopped taking expensive toys last year because I hated spending all my time at the pool keeping an eye on the $10 torpedo and Imaginext Superheros.

[poppy]

Do not take toys without asking AND do not bring toys you won't share.

[LaCEmom]

We generally share our toys with others and ask before playing with something that doesn't belong to us. I have no problem asking a child myself or letting my son ask for something back if it seems like someone's hogging it. We've never had a problem involving pool toys that wasn't easily fixed with a conversation. :)

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

Other

 

You should not take toys you are not willing to share to a group environment.

(The exception being comfort item type toys or a specific favorite of a child too young to understand sharing.)

 

If the toys are laying around the pool, unused, they would look like fair game.

 

I would expect my kids to ask before playing with toys that looked as though they belonged to another child.

 

I would not expect someone to take toys from a bag sitting away from the pool.

 

 

^ this is what we do.

 

 

We live in a small town with a pool. Toys are generally shared however I do expect my boys to ask before using someone else's toys. We don't take toys often but they are allowed at our pool.

[kwickimom]

We share all of our pool toys. I bought a bunch of extras just so we could share. I keep them near me in a bag and everyone just asks if they can use them. I expect my kids to ask before playing with anyone else's toys also.

[Murphy101]

If it doesn't belong to you, then you have no claim to it and should ask. The end.

 

I typically bring stuff for my child and expect others to go the same.

 

Most of the time I don't mind sharing as long as my kid doesn't mind sharing.

 

This problem is resolved by owning your own pool. ;)

[NicAnn]

We share all of our pool toys. I bought a bunch of extras just so we could share. I keep them near me in a bag and everyone just asks if they can use them. I expect my kids to ask before playing with anyone else's toys also.

 

 

Us too. I always hunt around for cheap or free toys to share when we go out. I keep extra sand toys for park days too.

 

Mine ask to play with other toys, but usually parents or kids offer.

[teachermom2834]

Our pool culture is such that toys hanging around the pool unattended are free game to pick up and play with. Toys are returned to the owner when the owner is leaving or simply wants them back. I can't imagine anyone digging through someone's bag or anything but toys in/around the pool are shared. There is also a "lost and found" that in reality is community property. People dig through the lost and found to find things to play with/ spare goggles to "borrow". If someone has something they don't want to share they just keep it close to them/ in a bag, etc. I don't like ours getting all spread around so I tend to keep most of them in a bag by a table. Ours is a fairly small neighborhood pool. It would be a much different story at the city public pool. I imagine there we would keep our toys very close for fear of losing them.

[Koerarmoca]

We have a community pool in our subdivision. My kids bring toys and floaties if they leave them laying around kids will take them. Personally I find it rude because I teach my kids not to touch/take things that don't belong to them. Some kids will ask me if they can play with something I tell them which child it belongs to and to ask them. We have had some issues due to language barriers (our area is heavily Hispanic)

 

I also don't allow the children to bring personal/special toys that they can not live without. We have dive sticks, squirt guns, floats etc.

[bolt.]

I go to a pool that has "its own toys" -- so if we bring something, I expect other children to generally tend to use it (if it is left unattended). My kids have also made the same mistaken assumption from time to time. The usual thing that is done is to say to the playing child or their parent, "I'm sorry, but that is ours from home." Them say, either that it is OK that they play for a while but please put it back where we had it -- or that we'd like it back now. We've never had if be a problem once we located the child and explained things.

[kitten18]

Do not take toys without asking AND do not bring toys you won't share.

 

I agree. That's the unwritten rule in our community for the pool and the parks.

[bettyandbob]

Those of you who think you shouldn't bring a toy you won't share, please explain to me why my ds should not have his rings at the pool and expect to play with them on his own or with me? Why is there a requirement that some random kid who wants to use the should expect we will "share"? There are no rules at the swimming pool stating anything brought in is to be used by everyone else. Our toys have our name on them.

 

 

[Joker]

We share, but I don't let dds play with anything unless they've been invited or asked. Many times we've had kids start playing with something that is ours but it doesn't bother us.

[KungFuPanda]

I voted other because we would expect to share, but we would expect to be ASKED first. Usually this is how it worked out except with toddlers. I never had 'expectation' about toddlers. They're just different.

[KungFuPanda]

I voted other because we would expect to share, but we would expect to be ASKED first. Usually this is how it worked out except with toddlers. I never had 'expectation' about toddlers. They're just different.

[bolt.]

Those of you who think you shouldn't bring a toy you won't share, please explain to me why my ds should not have his rings at the pool and expect to play with them on his own or with me? Why is there a requirement that some random kid who wants to use the should expect we will "share"? There are no rules at the swimming pool stating anything brought in is to be used by everyone else. Our toys have our name on them.

There is a vast difference between "I wouldn't" and "You shouldn't" -- I wouldn't bring non-sharing toys because small children make mistakes and 'borrow' things in confusing environments. Therefore, I wouldn't want to deal with the drama of my kids' big feelings if a prized possession got accidetally borrowed and went missing in action for a few minutes. Plus, I don't want the bother of actively keeping an eye on our belongings at all times. To me, it's just less fun to have to worry about those issues, so I take less meaningful things.

 

(Which is very different from any reason why "you shouldn't". There is no reason why "you shouldn't". Obviously, you can make any decision that pleases you. We were just asked to explain which decision pleases each one if us individually... No harm is inteded by answering the question.)

[AndyJoy]

We bring lots of toys to the pool (and park) with the intention of sharing them. I don't think we've ever had a kid use them without either asking, being invited by my son, or being reminded to ask by his/her parent. In fact, we encounter a lot of parents who just assume we won't want to share and try to keep their kid away, but we say, "We bring them to share." I also don't have a problem asking for something back if we're leaving, it's being abused, or the kid is hogging it.

 

I don't let my son play with other people's toys without asking. And if it is something that was obviously intended for one person and not really sharable or easily damageable I don't let him ask.