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I have two precious DD's ages 8 and 5 but lately I have been ready to pull my hair out. There has been to much sassy talk, arguing, whinning, expecting, scowling, complaining at chore time, and half done right chores (which I make them complete correctly). I have always been so consistant with discipline and expectations that I am just not sure what I am doing wrong or what is going on. I have read on here several times about people taking a few weeks off to work on character training but what does that mean/look like at your house. What are you actually taking time off to do? Just looking for ideas on how to handle this so we can enjoy our summer together and start school in the fall with happy hearts:) Thanks!

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I am interested in character training too. We are only half way through our school year, its winter here :) I am thinking of studying attentiveness first. I am going to use rescources from homeschoolshare.com and characterjournal. There are several other companies or sites if you google it. We are about to have a two week break, so I might start during that time or wait til after our break. I just thought I'd add say 15mins each morning straight after Bible to delve into character, maybe taking a week or two on each trait. I think we need to make character training a lifetime event - even some of us mums need it ;) Hope this helps a little

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We are secular. We use We Choose Virtues cards, and DS chooses a card to work on for the month. I used to choose for him, but now he can choose his own. Then we read corresponding stories. Right now we are using Character Building Day by Day. We've also used Value Tales (I think that's the title). We discuss the trait we're focusing on whenever we can, throughout the month.

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This is a simple idea that we got at the homeschool convention last week-end. So far it's working. We have a chart with her responsibilities listed. She gets a plus sign by the chore if she does it with a good attitude, and a minus if she does it with a bad attitude. She has to do the chore either way. "Bad attitude" can encompass many things- whining, pouting, saying "no," not doing the job completely, etc. She gets a ticket for a plus sign and a consequence for a minus sign. The tickets translate to a privilege like staying up late, having a picnic in the yard for dinner, and other FREE privileges, mixed in with some that cost money. We add up the pluses at the end of day so we're not dealing with tickets constantly! She has a plastic box with dividers in it to keep her tickets in. She knows exactly what items on the reward menu that she is "saving up" for, believe me. :)

 

It has made DD a lot more aware of her attitude. I know some people are against token reward systems, but right now we needed something. I decided to do this because I need to get DD into a routine for homeschooling come fall. We are doing light homeschooling review and she gets pluses for completing her work with a good attitude too. I am really pleased with the results so far.

 

ETA: I forgot to say that the speaker at the convention gave her kids nickels for pluses and they owed a nickel for a minus. We came up with the ticket system ourselves. We don't take tickets away because she earned them. We give other consequences instead of taking away tickets. If she doesn't put toys away or clean up messes, she gets the toys or crafts supplies taken away, for example. It's more of a natural consequence thing I guess.

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We like We Choose Virtues. Kids like the cartoon characters & funny rhymes. Now, when stuck in line at the store, even my 5 yr old says, "Don't worry, Mom. I can wait & wait & wait with a smile." I think we have the family kit.

 

We also use Bigger Stories for Little Folks & Devotional Stories for Little Folks by Nancy Nicholson. Kids get a kick out of all the sticky situations the little brother gets himself into.

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We just bought the big Blessings chart and the If Then chart from Doorposts at the convention. I keep the blessings in the kitchen so I am aware throughout the day to comment on their good behavior. They get a pom pom. After 50 pompoms they get to choose a prize. They made the list of prizes which are: a lolliipop, pick and play family game, stay up 10 minutes later, pick a Popsicle from the freezer, pick a family movie, or read a comic book. After 75 pompoms, they can get 10 minutes iPad time. However, we have a daily reward for cheerfulness/thankfulness. If they can get rough a whole day without whining, or pouting, or acting grouchy etc, they can pick from extra snuggle time, read a comic book, or play a fast card game. Amazing what a turnaround my 'down in the dumps' boy has done. they were also the ones to provide input on what the consequences should be for the if-then chart. They were very involved and liked the whole idea of the two charts. (my kids are 8yo)

 

Both have forced me to become more immediate in both my praise and discipline. There are consistent, written rewards and consequences, as well as the words to define the actions.

 

Granted we are still in the first couple weeks, but so far so good. The house is much more pleasant.

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