Delaying HS entry

[Donna T.]

Hi! I have shared in other threads about the situation that we are in as my oldest son prepares to enter HS next year. Long story short... we lost some time this year as our family dealt with the very sad reality of two critically ill family members and their eventual deaths this spring after much suffering. My son is smart and usually a hard worker, but there were many days when he couldn't complete particular things because he was either dealing with his own emotions, giving me the space to process my emotions, or we were visiting our family or care-taking. I do not want him to head into HS feeling behind and defeated before he has even started! So, I have come up with a few options that I am rolling over in my brain during those brief times when my brain is not mush.

 

I am considering delaying the start of 9th grade until January. This would give him time to complete the rest of his Pre-algebra curriculum, finish reading the last couple of months of his Sonlight core (core H), finish the last couple of months of work in his science (Apologia's Physical Science), and have a much needed break during June, July, and the first couple of weeks of August. We would not normally take such a long summer break, but I need it and I think he needs it, though I am sure he will continue to make some progress this summer. I just don't want him to HAVE to do so. And, we will be hosting our hopefully future daughter for five weeks this summer with the intention to go to Ukraine this fall for up to eight weeks for her adoption.

 

I think if we delay beginning HS rather than push to be ready in the late summer or early fall that he will be stronger in many ways; academically and emotionally. I think this will be a benefit to him.

 

But, I want to consider the ramifications of this choice on his future. Are there any negatives that I may have overlooked? I have discussed this option with my school administrator and she said it would be fine. She didn't seem to think it was a problem at all. I think this decision may bother my son. He is a perfectionist who wants to do everything just right. I think he will see this as a failure on his part when it absolutely is not. So, I do plan to be sensitive to his thoughts and feelings, but I think this is the best choice for us to make so he can go into HS ready for 1) algebra 2) HS level Biology and 3) the integration of a new sister into the family.

 

I would like to know if this is a big, huge, yes-you-are-ruining-his-future deal! FWIW, he wants to be a Marine Biologist and will probably attend a small private Christian college near our home that has a wonderful Marine Science program. This has been his dream since he was three years old, and I'm not exaggerating! That's one reason that I want him to have a minimum of Algebra1 for HS.

[Nscribe]

There are a couple of current threads about credits needed for high school and about ages for graduation/college that are active here in the high school section. You might want to look over them.

 

You said he is bright and hard working and you both are grieving. Grief can be a process and he may handle it differently as time passes than you. He is at that age where he is changing so much anyway. It is hard, but if he can continue to work math it will help open options. Sciences in high school are so math dependent that when push comes to shove it is the one thing you do if you can't eek out anything else. Is there some way he could be more independent with the math (video supplement or such) so that you have the time to grieve for yourself while he continues?

 

Going to the Ukraine is an education in itself. Life offers learning opportunities and sometimes the key is seeing how they are just as valuable as a text and some questions. He will have an experience that is rich and direct. You can learn so much history just figuring out how the Ukraine became what it is.

 

We went through a time a few years ago when real life just kept persistently reminding us it required our attention. We made it through, and found by keeping that math going the rest fell in place quickly and easily once the crisis passed. Dd now has choices, graduation early, on time or late -- because we kept that math going. The storms and clouds do pass, it is nice to have something to harvest when they do.

[Donna T.]

Thank you so much for your input Nscribe! He will continue with the math. I mean, he will probably continue with everything! Maybe it's not as important where he is at when he begins 9th as where he finishes. I think my idea to delay HS is more of a psychological thing for me than a practicality for him. I want to have time this summer for him to read books that are not scheduled in his curriculum. For example, he just started The Hobbit and wants to read all of that series. I told him he could cut back on his reading on his Sonlight core and he said that was what he loves most about school!

 

I think he could finish everything in time to begin 9th in late August, but I am not sure if that is best or not. I want him to have time to go to the city pool, ride his bike, read books of his own choosing, etc. I want him to have a challenging HS experience. I know he can and will grow into that, but I'm feeling so unsettled about staring at his first year of HS when he really needs a few more months to finish the things he is currently doing. I know he isn't doing HS level work right now but with a little more time he will be able to thrive.

 

Maybe I should just see how the summer goes and then make a decision closer to the fall. I am just so ready for a real break. He is very capable of independent work. I think he needs a break too though.

 

My school admin. recommended that we go ahead and start HS but let him take a half credit for Modern History when he completes the Sonlight core. But, that doesn't help much with the math and science.

 

 

 

 

 

[regentrude]

From what you write, I have the impression that he is somewhat reluctant about the plan? If he wants to start high school in the fall and not start later, but also needs the break, I will make a heretical suggestion: what about calling 8th grade simply done except for math?

 

Nobody will ask whether he finished what you had planned for 8th grade, nor does that constitute a prerequisite for moving on to high school. Math is the only thing I'd continue, because that will determine his science progression, and I would aim for finishing algebra 1 by the end of 9th grade.

But history and Physical Science? Don't sweat it. So, it did not get done. Shrug. Life happened. Take a long summer break, let him play at the pool, ride his bike, read what he wants. You are not chained to the curriculum. If you need a break, take it. And see later this summer whether he wants to make a fresh start with high school in the fall or wait until January.

[jhschool]

My two cents.

I am not trying to pressure you into anything, but this is what I truly believe:

 

Let him start 9th grade *next* school year-Fall 2014. From now until August, keep doing the

math like someone else suggested, and a couple other favorite subjects (for example,

reading classics). Then, in Fall 2014, he can start 9th grade a much stronger student and

with the math he'll need to take at least Chemistry and Algebra-based physics. You can

then continue math all year. He can also write

some essays this summer to keep himself good at writing.

 

Would you consider delaying the whole year? And doing high-school level work for that time?

That way he will be a strong freshman in Fall 2014.

[Julie of KY]

I agree with the above. Take a break, but cntinue math if possible. When you resume school, call it 9th grade. Continue in whatever math he's in. There is no rule that a math class has to start and end at the beginning and end of a grade. Start whatever science Lu want in high school, ignore the fact that he may not finish physical science. IF he wants to finish Core H, then call it part of a world history credit. You also don't have to finish a world history credit in one grade.

 

[Nscribe]

 

Maybe I should just see how the summer goes and then make a decision closer to the fall. I am just so ready for a real break. He is very capable of independent work. I think he needs a break too though.

 

My school admin. recommended that we go ahead and start HS but let him take a half credit for Modern History when he completes the Sonlight core. But, that doesn't help much with the math and science.

 

 

I think if you look at all of our responses you will see a common suggestion, continue math purposefully, let the rest fall where it may. Don't stop him from doing anything, just let him know math needs to be done and let him go at it.

 

You need the break. He may or may not. You said he could work independently, let him try and give yourself time to grieve and heal. Teens don't process grief as we do, he may be healed differently.

 

If it will make you feel better to go to the pool a lot, get out and about and such, then go. It sure will not hurt him to be out and active. He can have a fun filled summer and do math. My Dd is often doing math over the summers and she packs a load of fun in as well.

 

I can feel your fatigue just via the typed words. You need time and you should take it so that you can fortify for the year to follow. The Sonlight and all is nice, but frankly if he can manage the math it really is enough for the summer. Reading the Hobbit is fun, and if he wants to he would be like many other kids his age who read fun books in the summer and escape a bit in them.

 

Hugs to you. It is hard to process loss.

[ZooRho]

We ended up holding our son back his sophomore year. It was a good thing for him.

 

He had been sick and hospitalized and then has some sports injuries that just totally didn't make it so the school work got done. Dh and I decided why were we pushing him at that point.

 

So glad we did it.

[freesia]

From what you write, I have the impression that he is somewhat reluctant about the plan? If he wants to start high school in the fall and not start later, but also needs the break, I will make a heretical suggestion: what about calling 8th grade simply done except for math?

 

Nobody will ask whether he finished what you had planned for 8th grade, nor does that constitute a prerequisite for moving on to high school. Math is the only thing I'd continue, because that will determine his science progression, and I would aim for finishing algebra 1 by the end of 9th grade.

But history and Physical Science? Don't sweat it. So, it did not get done. Shrug. Life happened. Take a long summer break, let him play at the pool, ride his bike, read what he wants. You are not chained to the curriculum. If you need a break, take it. And see later this summer whether he wants to make a fresh start with high school in the fall or wait until January.

This exactly! If he wants to free read the Sonlight books, let him. They will cover the history that he "misses" and he'll get the history again. If you do Core 100 you will hit the time periods you miss again.The Core that covers 20th century will hit, in depth, whatever you miss. Science will all be repeated.

 

With regard to math, I would keep going at a relaxed pace. Even working an hour on math he should have plenty of fun time this summer. If your Algebra program has a strong "pre-algebra" section (like Jacobs) you could possible lop off the end of pre-algebra or skip the review when you start Algebra.

[Donna T.]

Wow, thanks so much to each of you who took the time to respond. Each response has helped me to look at this situation with different eyes. I really did not realize that it wouldn't be a problem if he started 9th grade in October or November. I guess my main question really was what impact it would have on his future college admission if we moved to a January to January school year rather than an August to August. I don't know if that matters or not, as far as applying for and being accepted into college. We have always schooled pretty much year round but have only had to turn in our days for a typical 9 month school year. I know our local community college will admit students any semester. I just wasn't sure how a more competitive school admissions department would view a January to January school year.

 

I do totally agree that his grieving process has been different than mine. Honestly, it is me that needs a break, but it's not from teaching! It's from planning and decision-making, and the pressure of feeling behind.

 

Thanks so much! It will work out. I am thankful to be able to ask questions here. This board has been a huge support to us since he was a PKer!