Okay...

[LibraryLover]

I finally met a young person attached to their cell phone.

The odd thing is that he is very personable and chatty. He is funny and adorable.

But. He kept looking down at his phone, and at nearly the same time he would keep eye contact with me and answer my questions.

 

[Chris in VA]

Maybe he was trying to keep an eye on texts? I agree, majorly rude. I see it all the time. Kids were texting in the choir loft at church during the service, even...

[LibraryLover]

Maybe he was trying to keep an eye on texts? I agree, majorly rude. I see it all the time. Kids were texting in the choir loft at church during the service, even...

 

I am sorry I used the header OK. If someone can delete this it would be great. I am so sorry! I was not thinking!

[PrincessMommy]

 

I am sorry I used the header OK. If someone can delete this it would be great. I am so sorry! I was not thinking!

 

I think there's a way you can fix it yourself. Try editing your first post and see if you can change the header there.

[LibraryLover]

 

I think there's a way you can fix it yourself. Try editing your first post and see if you can change the header there.

 

 

 

Thanks. This must be new. :) I appreciate the info.

[Pippen]

In the past year I've run into so many adults who are attached to their cell phones that I don't think of it as something just young people do anymore.

[Lizzie in Ma]

Sad to say, we have 3 ADULT choir members who keep looking at their smartphones during church.

 

 

I know a lot of folks, including myself who use a Bible app on their smartphone. So I am holding my phone during church and highlighting and taking notes on the sermon in my Bible app.

Just saying, it may not always be inappropriate use. ;)

[poppy]

That is just rude. Most everyone I know that age is addicted to their phone, but knows better than to behave that way. I think I'd have called him on it by saying something like "I'm sorry is now a bad time to talk?" Because it truly may have been, if he was waiting for an important update.

 

 

I know a lot of folks, including myself who use a Bible app on their smartphone. So I am holding my phone during church and highlighting and taking notes on the sermon in my Bible app.

Just saying, it may not always be inappropriate use. ;)

 

I do not consider that to be an appropriate use, personally. But I am sure it depends on the culture of the individual church. To me that is no different than the OP's problem of dealing with someone whose attention is divided, basically telling the people who performed the service "what you are doing is only worth a portion of my attention".

[WishboneDawn]

 

 

I know a lot of folks, including myself who use a Bible app on their smartphone. So I am holding my phone during church and highlighting and taking notes on the sermon in my Bible app.

Just saying, it may not always be inappropriate use. ;)

 

I might be with Poppy on this one. :D

 

Church, for me at least, is about worship with the community. Doing things that seperate you from that community (or look to others like you're seperating yourself from that community) would seem to me to be questionable.

[J-rap]

I think I'd have to excuse myself and walk away (I'd be polite about it). I just can't deal with that very well.

 

I've been to children's performances where the parent is in the audience, her cell phone rings, and she answers it and talks on it -- in the middle of the performance. It's definitely not just kids.

[littlebug42]

It definitely isn't just kids. I took Sweet-Pea to the opera recently for the first time. She was very excited but during the second act, the woman next to her kept checking her phone and it was very distracting. I asked her afterwards and she thought the opera was great except for the rude woman next to her. When my 11 year old has better manners than you do, maybe you shouldn't waste your money on opera tickets.

[Pippen]

A number of people in my adult Sunday School class--including the teacher--use their Bible apps exclusively on their phones instead of a bound Bible in class. I probably would except the one I bought is hard to navigate.

[Laurie4b]

I might be with Poppy on this one. :D

 

Church, for me at least, is about worship with the community. Doing things that seperate you from that community (or look to others like you're seperating yourself from that community) would seem to me to be questionable.

 

How is taking notes on a sermon separating yourself from community?

 

Is it separating yourself from community to look down at your Bible? To take notes on paper?

[poppy]

A number of people in my adult Sunday School class--including the teacher--use their Bible apps exclusively on their phones instead of a bound Bible in class. I probably would except the one I bought is hard to navigate.

 

That would be like id the preacher said "everyone turn to your bible for this", and some used a paper bible, and others used the electronic version. I can't see anything wrong with that.

[Plink]

 

 

I might be with Poppy on this one. :D

 

Church, for me at least, is about worship with the community. Doing things that seperate you from that community (or look to others like you're seperating yourself from that community) would seem to me to be questionable.

 

 

Huh? It isn't rude to take notes during service with a pencil. It isn't rude to read your Bible. I don't understand the difference.

[Amy in NH]

Huh? It isn't rude to take notes during service with a pencil. It isn't rude to read your Bible. I don't understand the difference.

 

 

I'm not a regular church-goer, so maybe I'm wrong, but... the way I see it, the church sermon is not a Bible study, it is a time to sit quietly and reflect on what the preacher is preaching, feel it, but not interact in ways outside the "norm" of the service. The congregation stands at a particular time, sits, sings, etc., but taking notes has never been a direction in the program when I've been to a service in any church. Taking notes in any way may be rude in that situation, and in fact I think it probably takes away from the experience that is what the service is all about both for other people and for you.

[Pippen]

I'm not a regular church-goer, so maybe I'm wrong, but... the way I see it, the church sermon is not a Bible study, it is a time to sit quietly and reflect on what the preacher is preaching, feel it, but not interact in ways outside the "norm" of the service. The congregation stands at a particular time, sits, sings, etc., but taking notes has never been a direction in the program when I've been to a service in any church. Taking notes in any way may be rude in that situation, and in fact I think it probably takes away from the experience that is what the service is all about both for other people and for you.

 

 

Actively using the Bible and taking notes during the sermon very much depends on the church. It's common in mine, and there are even pages in the bulletin set aside for taking sermon notes.

[Down_the_Rabbit_Hole]

 

I'm not a regular church-goer, so maybe I'm wrong, but... the way I see it, the church sermon is not a Bible study, it is a time to sit quietly and reflect on what the preacher is preaching, feel it, but not interact in ways outside the "norm" of the service. The congregation stands at a particular time, sits, sings, etc., but taking notes has never been a direction in the program when I've been to a service in any church. Taking notes in any way may be rude in that situation, and in fact I think it probably takes away from the experience that is what the service is all about both for other people and for you.

 

Most of the churches I have attended have note paper in the bulletin, some are fill in the blank type. It actually makes you stay focused because you have to listen to fill it in. I find nothing wrong with this. Why not take notes in church? you can check the validity of the sermon later, reflect on points made, or just have it as reference for later in life. Church sermons are not a here and now thing, they are meant to be taken away and applied to life.

Bible apps, ereader Bibles or paper Bibles...all are acceptable.

 

As to the OP, it was rude. I personally will not converse with someone who has their phone out ans will happily tell them why.

[poppy]

Most of the churches I have attended have note paper in the bulletin, some are fill in the blank type. It actually makes you stay focused because you have to listen to fill it in. I find nothing wrong with this. Why not take notes in church? you can check the validity of the sermon later, reflect on points made, or just have it as reference for later in life. Church sermons are not a here and now thing, they are meant to be taken away and applied to life.

Bible apps, ereader Bibles or paper Bibles...all are acceptable.

 

As to the OP, it was rude. I personally will not converse with someone who has their phone out ans will happily tell them why.

 

Like I said, depends on the culture of the church. In mine that would be rude. A sermon is not just a professor's lecture, it's a journey, and many of us is go on that journey as a community - without distraction or private diversions, making eye contact with the preacher, actively engaged by listening.

 

It's less like a professor's classroom and more like a dinner party with an engaging speaker.

 

The half dozen churches I've been to all put sermons online to listen to at home later, or if you miss the service.

[LostSurprise]

Not everyone is an auditory learner, so rapt attention as a group to an auditory lesson (often known or repeated to long time worshipers) is not feasible for everyone. Nor does it mean that someone is distancing themselves from the community by involving themselves visually or kinesthetically to learn. It may mean they take the message seriously enough to find what involves them personally and brings the message home for them.

 

Of course, I can imaging a lot of this has to do with a church's culture...especially how long sermons tend to be. In a church with a 10-15 minute sermon and much call and response before that, I can imagine that many parishioners see the complete service as a community experience. In most Protestant churches the sermon runs 30-60 minutes and tries to get much more in depth with a particular passage. In my opinion, its vital to teach yourself how to get involved with the message, otherwise you lose the opportunity to learn and grow with your community.

[Jenny in Florida]

Not everyone is an auditory learner, so rapt attention as a group to an auditory lesson (often known or repeated to long time worshipers) is not feasible for everyone. Nor does it mean that someone is distancing themselves from the community by involving themselves visually or kinesthetically to learn. It may mean they take the message seriously enough to find what involves them personally and brings the message home for them.

 

 

I have a medical quirk that causes my blood pressure to drop when I sit or stand still for an extended period of time, meaning that no matter how interested I am in the content of a lesson to which I'm listening, there is a real danger I will doze off unless I can make use of one or more of a few strategies.

 

Moving helps. For example, I listen to podcasts and audiobooks and similar content while I walk with my dog each morning, while I'm driving and sometimes while I'm puttering around in the kitchen. Listening while moving actually makes it possible for me to focus more on the content, not less, because I remain more alert.

 

When that is not possible, in situations like church where it would be inappropriate to get up and walk around the sanctuary during the sermon, I can get some of the same benefit from pairing listening with some secondary activity. Doodling on my order of service, taking notes, etc., works wonders.

[poppy]

Not everyone is an auditory learner, so rapt attention as a group to an auditory lesson (often known or repeated to long time worshipers) is not feasible for everyone. Nor does it mean that someone is distancing themselves from the community by involving themselves visually or kinesthetically to learn. It may mean they take the message seriously enough to find what involves them personally and brings the message home for them.

 

Do you take notes at funerals too? Weddings?

[BarbecueMom]

It's rude... but I do this sometimes with my mom. She'll come over to help with the kids in weekends if DH is working on a project or yard work and I really need to sit and rest (almost 28 weeks pregnant). But instead of letting me rest, she'll sit down and rehash every conversation we've had in the last week. Sticking my phone in my face is like my gentle way of saying, "I need silence, not a social hour!" The non-gentle way of being direct and asking for quiet usually leads to the irrational fear that I don't love her anymore. I do love and appreciate her, but if I'm tired of the kids, I'm certainly too tired to deal with that!

 

But yeah, I'm aware that it's still rude (even if somewhat justified), and I wouldn't do that in front of anyone else.

[T'smom]

A sermon is not a funeral or a wedding! A recent guest speaker at our church mentioned multiple times that 80% of people will not remember what the sermon was about 2 hours later. He said people come up to him all the time and say "hey, I loved the sermon today" and he asks them what they loved or what they got out of it and that almost all of them can only remember a funny story he told. They can't even remember the point of the funny story! Writing things down helps you remember them.

 

I listen to sermons to learn and apply the lessons to my life. Taking notes helps with that. Following along in my bible helps with that. In all the churches I have attended, there are notes included in the bulletin. Usually a fill in the blank type. Of course, this may vary by church, but I personally know several pastors and all the ones I know want people to take notes.

 

I don't have a smartphone, but many in my congregation do and they have their bibles on them and read them. In my bible study group at a different church, I am the only one to pull out an actual bible. Every single other person uses an electronic version. It's not wrong, it's the same bible, just different packaging.

[Dandelion]

I agree that it's rude to be glued to your phone when you're talking to someone in person. It's definitely not just kids anymore - adults do it too.

 

Like Poppy, I will usually say something like "Is this a bad time?" or "Should we reschedule?" if I'm meeting with someone and they're constantly checking their phone. About 6 years ago, I even had to do this with a senior manager at work. We had scheduled a meeting (it was just the two of us) and he was constantly looking at his phone. After a few minutes, I just said "This seems to be a bad time. Let's reschedule." He instantly got the message, and put his phone down. I never had that problem with him again. ;)

 

The rule I hold myself to is that "people right in front of me come first". Unless I'm expecting an important call, in which case I will tell the person I'm with ahead of time that I might need to take a call. Everything else can wait.

 

One other interesting tidbit: they've actually done studies that show that when someone leaves their phone on the table next to them while meeting with someone else, the other person's impression of the phone-carrying individual and the relationship they have with that person is diminished simply due to the presence of the phone. Even if the person doesn't answer it. Just the perception that the person might prioritize a phone call or text over their in-person companion is enough. Since reading that, I always keep my phone in my purse when I'm meeting with friends.

[Jenny in Florida]

One other thing to consider: I don't wear a watch. Instead, I use my cell phone to keep track of time. So, I would probably have my phone sitting on the table during a meeting, and I might look at it occasionally, not because I'm looking for texts, but because I'm checking the time. If that's rude, well, then I'll be rude. I'm afraid I rarely have the luxury of being able to sit around chatting with friends without any kind of limitations on my time.

[Lizzie in Ma]

I do not consider that to be an appropriate use, personally. But I am sure it depends on the culture of the individual church. To me that is no different than the OP's problem of dealing with someone whose attention is divided, basically telling the people who performed the service "what you are doing is only worth a portion of my attention".

 

 

I don't see how using an electronic Bible and taking notes is any different than having my Bible open and taking notes. We are encouraged to take sermon notes, make highlights and such during the sermons. Our pastor often tells us to make a note of something to read more in depth later on and has notes up for us to copy.

[WishboneDawn]

 

 

Actively using the Bible and taking notes during the sermon very much depends on the church. It's common in mine, and there are even pages in the bulletin set aside for taking sermon notes.

 

 

Yeah, I think I was missing cultural differences. I noticed the other thread where it was mentioned that notetaking was encouraged in some churches. Depends on the chudch methinks! .

[JNW]

It is an adjustment for me seeing phones used as bibles during a sermon. I definitely don't think there's anything wrong with it, but I usually equate phones with talking, texting, or using the internet. It's hard to tell exactly what anyone is using the phone for at any given time. But it's really none of my business. As long as it's quiet I don't mind. If they're playing Words with Friends in church I suppose that's between them and God. And their friends.

[YaelAldrich]

In Judaism, there is an idea called ma'arit ayin. Basically, it means that what you may be doing is perfectly appropriate, but the perception of what you are doing looks incorrect. It is correct in some churches to take notes on the sermon, follow along in the Bible and that could be done on a smartphone. BUT, since the usual (sad) thing that people do with smartphones (the constant glancing at the phone while trying to have a conversation) is rude, the idea of doing it for a positive purpose without a explicit way to make it known that you are doing an acceptable thing is not acceptable, For example, McDonalds in the US isn't kosher, but if we have to take our kids into the restaurant to go to the bathroom, we have the boys take off their headcoverings so that no person starts to assume McDs is kosher or that we observant Jews are eating there.

[LostSurprise]

Do you take notes at funerals too? Weddings?

 

Would it make me a better Christian if I did? I mean that honestly, that isn't a snarky question. If taking notes during a wedding or a funeral will make me a better Christian, one with more knowledge, more engagement, more interest, then I would take notes.

 

I have taken notes during a few funerals, mostly stories of the person who passed away. I like to keep the program with the notes to remind me of that person.

 

I've never taken notes during a wedding (I took notes before my wedding so I'd be prepared). I've rarely been to a wedding that had enough unique information to make it necessary. I'm bored most of the time. Perhaps I should take notes. :thumbup1:

[poppy]

Would it make me a better Christian if I did? I mean that honestly, that isn't a snarky question. If taking notes during a wedding or a funeral will make me a better Christian, one with more knowledge, more engagement, more interest, then I would take notes.

 

My answer to this came from the other thread on this topic. I grew up Catholic, and in Catholicism, Sunday mass is a worship service no less holy than a funeral or marriage. It sounds as though some Protestant denominations treat Sunday service as more of a Bible study. So, sounds like it's just a different animal than my frame of reference.