Boys using public restrooms- when to allow them in the men's room alone

[Forget-Me-Not]

Those of you who don't take your boys with you if they are over 4 or 5, what do you do if YOU need to pee and for some reason just can't wait until you get home? Do you leave them outside the restroom by themselves? Until my boy is old enough to sit outside the restroom without me (at least 7 or so), he will have to come in with me, so IMO it's no big deal if he does his business while he's in there (of course, he also still needs help sometimes with buttons or reaching soap and faucets).

 

Yeah, that's the other issue for me too. My other kids are two girls and a new baby (boy), so they all go with me. If its a situation where I don't want to leave him out alone, he comes in too. In that case, he usually just waits for us near the door or sinks, away from the stalls.

[MrsMommy]

 

Usually? I have no idea. I've seen kids of all ages peeking.

 

Obviously. Which is why I said "obviously challenged". If there were an invisible disability, well I wouldn't know, would I? If I saw a 10+ yo boy in the ladies' room just hanging out, with no obvious disability, I'd have to assume that the mother is one of those who just wants to keep their child close. Maybe I'm in the minority, but I'd find that obnoxious in a circumstance where I'm expecting privacy. I'd likely say something. If the child had an invisible disability, I'd apologize and go on about my business. Simple.

 

Yes, but that's my point. You see a 10 year that you can't tell has a disability, and you assume the worst because you can't see he's disabled. And I can guarantee that if you said something to me, the mother of a child who does have an invisible disability, an apology would not suffice. I would be embarrassed and outraged and extremely sad that you had to say something in the first place, and make it necessary to point out my son's challenges in front of him (and others). Not simple, not cool.

[Guest inoubliable]

Those of you who don't take your boys with you if they are over 4 or 5, what do you do if YOU need to pee and for some reason just can't wait until you get home? Do you leave them outside the restroom by themselves? Until my boy is old enough to sit outside the restroom without me (at least 7 or so), he will have to come in with me, so IMO it's no big deal if he does his business while he's in there (of course, he also still needs help sometimes with buttons or reaching soap and faucets).

 

If the child isn't mature enough to stand outside, or the venue is too crowded, then I'd bring the kid in. And have him wait by the door. That should be a no-brainer.

 

So to those who object to a male child over age 5/6 going into the women's room, what do you do with a child who is older but can't reach the urinal, sink, paper towels etc in the men's room? I

 

If the child isn't mature or tall enough to handle the men's room on their own, I wouldn't think anything about them being in the ladies' room.

 

 

It's not a black and white thing for me.

[Leav97]

I have never seen a sign like that.

 

I hope any place with that kind of sign is OK with grown women walking into the men's room with their 7yo sons, because when my ds was 7, I would have been one of those moms.

 

Would you be fine with grown men walking into the Women's room with their 7 yo daughters?

[Guest inoubliable]

 

Yes, but that's my point. You see a 10 year that you can't tell has a disability, and you assume the worst because you can't see he's disabled. And I can guarantee that if you said something to me, the mother of a child who does have an invisible disability, an apology would not suffice. I would be embarrassed and outraged and extremely sad that you had to say something in the first place, and make it necessary to point out my son's challenges in front of him (and others). Not simple, not cool.

 

I think you're sliding past my point in an effort to be offended.

 

It's not like I'd say something offensive. I'd say something like "It's a little uncomfortable to try using the restroom with a 10 year old boy in here." If that made you outraged, even after a sincere apology... well, that's your problem. Not mine. I wouldn't be pointing out anyone's challenges. How could I if I didn't know they exist? If you felt it necessary to go into depth about your son's challenges and then berate me for having valid feelings of my own about my privacy, how is that me pointing out your kid's disability? If someone had that sort of reaction to my simple statement, I'd think they were unhinged, to be honest.

[MrsMommy]

 

I think you're sliding past my point in an effort to be offended.

 

It's not like I'd say something offensive. I'd say something like "It's a little uncomfortable to try using the restroom with a 10 year old boy in here." If that made you outraged, even after a sincere apology... well, that's your problem. Not mine. I wouldn't be pointing out anyone's challenges. How could I if I didn't know they exist? If you felt it necessary to go into depth about your son's challenges and then berate me for having valid feelings of my own about my privacy, how is that me pointing out your kid's disability? If someone had that sort of reaction to my simple statement, I'd think they were unhinged, to be honest.

 

I am not trying to be offended. I'm simply trying to share the other side...the kind of things I've dealt with every single day for years. People looking at my son, who looks, for the most part, like any other child, and assuming he's a bad kid, or I'm a bad parent, because they base their opinions of his actions on how he looks, and not on anything else. Until you've lived it, you have no idea. It doesn't make me unhinged, it makes me a mama bear always looking out for him. And I wouldn't go in depth about his challenges, but if you had the nerve to say something to me, I would offer you something of an explanation, if only so he would see that I am always there to come to his defense. I wouldn't become loudly outraged at you, for what it's worth, but I would be seething inside, and I would never, ever forget it.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

Would you be fine with grown men walking into the Women's room with their 7 yo daughters?

 

 

My brother has run into this, his girls are under 7. He is the stay at home parent. While he doesn't take them into the women's restroom, he does not like taking them into the men's restroom. The men's room has no privacy. It is usually messy, and there is rarely a diaper changing station. His girls are past diapers now so the diaper changing station isn't an issue now, but seeing men using urinals is. At least in the women's restroom we have stalls.

[Guest inoubliable]

 

I am not trying to be offended. I'm simply trying to share the other side...the kind of things I've dealt with every single day for years. People looking at my son, who looks, for the most part, like any other child, and assuming he's a bad kid, or I'm a bad parent, because they base their opinions of his actions on how he looks, and not on anything else. Until you've lived it, you have no idea. It doesn't make me unhinged, it makes me a mama bear always looking out for him. And I wouldn't go in depth about his challenges, but if you had the nerve to say something to me, I would offer you something of an explanation, if only so he would see that I am always there to come to his defense. I wouldn't become loudly outraged at you, for what it's worth, but I would be seething inside, and I would never, ever forget it.

 

I know the other side.

 

You sound as if you've been insulted in the past and it's made you bitter.

 

You have no idea if I've lived it. ;)

 

The reaction you described *would* make you appear unhinged, IMO. "Mama bear"? That sounds like someone enraged. If you offered a simple explanation like "There are circumstances.", I assure you that I'd catch on quite quickly and offer an apology. If you were seething on the inside after that, my opinion is unchanged.

 

Peace. I hope you find peace.

[Leav97]

My brother has run into this, his girls are under 7. He is the stay at home parent. While he doesn't take them into the women's restroom, he does not like taking them into the men's restroom. The men's room has no privacy. It is usually messy, and there is rarely a diaper changing station. His girls are past diapers now so the diaper changing station isn't an issue now, but seeing men using urinals is. At least in the women's restroom we have stalls.

 

 

My DH stays home with the kids. He runs into Mom's entering Men's locker rooms, no changing tables, ...

 

There is one grandma at swim lessons that deals with the locker room issue by joining her grandson in the men's locker room. The teenage and adult men do not appreciate women in the men's locker room. The women (their have been several) were appalled at the idea of a man entering the women's locker room to help a daughter. That's why I asked.

 

And just to add to the fun there is a family changing area available at the pool.

[MrsMommy]

 

I know the other side.

 

You sound as if you've been insulted in the past and it's made you bitter.

 

You have no idea if I've lived it. ;)

 

The reaction you described *would* make you appear unhinged, IMO. "Mama bear"? That sounds like someone enraged. If you offered a simple explanation like "There are circumstances.", I assure you that I'd catch on quite quickly and offer an apology. If you were seething on the inside after that, my opinion is unchanged.

 

Peace. I hope you find peace.

 

 

My son has been insulted. I'm not bitter, but I am vocal.

 

And I have tried "there are circumstances," and have been eye-rolled, and responded to sarcastically. Not helpful to me, not helpful to my son to hear.

 

Here is how my reaction would go: "I'm sorry you feel that way. My son has autism, and requires assistance. You may be uncomfortable, but I will not do things differently." This would be said at a normal volume, but with a bite. My face would be beet red, partly because of embarrassment, and partly because of rosacea. Inside, my heart would be pounding, because I hate when anyone makes me or my son uncomfortable, or puts any kind of spotlight on me. If that is unhinged to you, so be it.

 

You might catch on, but many people do not. And I have rarely been offered a sincere apology after such a comment...again, usually I get a sarcastic response, and then get to watch the person walk away whispering to their companions. If you've never encountered such a thing, then I'm happy for you. If what I have shared makes even one person reconsider how they might respond when they don't know all of the details, then I have done right by my son.

 

I have peace. That doesn't mean I have to be silent, and take whatever people think they have a right to dish out.

[Lady Florida.]

Would you be fine with grown men walking into the Women's room with their 7 yo daughters?

 

 

Deleted.

 

Nevermind. I misread this as a man taking his daughter into the Men's room.

[SKL]

I think 7 is on the line, as in, it depends where it is. I felt uncomfortable seeing an 8yo in the women's restroom at Olive Garden. At some point the boy's mom's fear has to give way to the concerns of girls and women who are in a vulnerable position. Once I was in Great Wolf Lodge ladies' changing room with my daughters (appx age 5), and they were going to go from the stall to the shower after swimming. I told them to just leave their bathing suits off because it's hard to wrestle a wet suit back on just to go a few steps. The next thing I know there's a boy about 10 years old in there. That's just wrong. The men's room is full of boys and caring fathers, for Pete's sake. It's not dangerous. I've been letting my kids go alone, depending on the place, since they were 3. They are now 6 and the only time I go with them is if I know it's a nasty place or I haven't previously checked it out.

[Baseball mom]

My oldest was probably about 8 & he took his little brother in then. Until then they were trained as soon as we stepped in the women's restroom eyes downward or straight ahead. We tried to get the wheelchair accessible stall. We would go in together. I would face the wall while they went (to teach them that we shouldn't look around) then while I would go they would face the wall. As we left it was the same thing. If we couldn't get the big stall they would stand outside the stall I was in, facing the wall. I wasn't trying to punish them but teach them respect others privacy.

[Dory]

I waited until my boys were old enough to wash their hands and dry them without assistance at public washrooms. My oldest was 7, my youngest now goes with his older brother and he's 6. I wait right outside and I can hear them the entire time (my youngest is loud). I will probably be a little uncomfortable with it until they are bigger than me, but so long as they are together and I'm not far away, well I guess letting them be independent isn't the end of the world. My dh has a harder time thinking through what to do with my dd when I'm not there. He doesn't like her being unsupervised in public places especially since she is going in alone whereas the boys have each other.

[Lady Florida.]

I have to laugh though. I once went to a concert where the line to the women's room was so ridiculously long (and there was no line to the men's room) that some women went into the men's room out of desperation. I didn't hear any complaints from any men.

 

 

I have a very assertive friend who did this at a football game. She was pregnant and showing at the time. Though there was a line at the men's room, it wasn't as long as the one for the women's room. She yelled out, "Make way! Pregnant woman coming through!" The men, either from shock, amusement, or deference, all moved over and let her in.

 

There was a famous case in the 90's, of a woman who was charged with a crime for using the men's room. It led to some changes in how bathrooms are set up. In Florida, it led to what we then called the "Potty Parity Law", and which was only recently repealed. I remember the publicity when the law was enacted, but had no idea it was repealed until just now while searching for a link to include in my post.

[Tammyla]

The woman was rude, I would never be offended by boys in the ladies room.

 

Personally, it depends on the kid and the restroom.

[Slartibartfast]

I don't think people actually know the age of a person without asking. Of course, there are children that frequently announce their age to everyone they run across, (dd) and their birthday, (dd) and my phone number (dd) but most kids don't overshare like mine.

 

Unless someone knows the age of the kid involved they need to just mind their own business. The woman was rude, I would just chalk it up to one of those people who don't care for children and move on. Probably not worth worrying about. I am sure someone with a bigger mouth will come along and let her know that they can manage their own lives without her interference.

 

It is the parent's decision and judgement that ought to take priority.

[unsinkable]

 

 

Well if you gotta go you gotta go! LOL

 

I don't understand why the men's line is always shorter though!

 

 

For the same reason that one car tapping its breaks can cause a traffic jam.

 

Seconds count. Men don't close a door. Don't lock a door. Don't turn around. Don't clean a seat ( if necessary) dont pull down their pants. Don't wipe. Don't pull up their pants. Don't unlock a door. Don't open a door.

 

All those seconds add up and then multiple by the number of women.

[Trish]

Age 10 and 8, and only together:

 

Child safety experts generally agree that most kids are not able to handle an emergency or threat to their safety until around age 10. That's why it's best to avoid letting your child use public restrooms in large areas, such as those found in stadiums or movie theaters, or bathrooms with multiple entrances, without you.

 

http://childparenting.about.com/od/healthsafety/f/when-can-a-child-use-public-bathroom-by-himself.htm

[KungFuPanda]

My son is 13 and sometimes goes into the ladies room with me. He's in a wheelchair and our house is the only place that's set up so he can go to the restroom unattended. I try to use the family rooms, but people like to move in to those and we can only wait so long. So, we just roll right in . . .usually past unused stalls to wait for the handicapped stall (because people like elbow room).

 

Stalls have doors. There's nothing to see in the restroom. We'll continue to use the women's room whenever we need to and I dare anyone to confront me about it in person. (I expect people HERE to challenge me :-)

[JennyD]

My oldest was about 6 when he started going in by himself; now, at 7yo, he goes in with his 5yo brother all the time. I would take the 7yo in with me at an airport or stadium, but not elsewhere. If the 7yo is not with us I take the 5yo into the women's with the 2yo and myself.

 

I have found pool locker rooms to be much more difficult to navigate than bathrooms. There was a long stretch from about 5-6.5 when I felt that my oldest was just too old to take into the women's locker room with me but too young to shower and dress in the men's locker room alone. Now I feel comfortable enough with him going to the men's locker room at the pool, but my 5yo is now at the same betwixt-and-between stage, and the 7yo claims that the 5yo is uncooperative in the locker room when they go in together (which I have no doubt is true).

[vonfirmath]

Oh, and of course we use family restrooms where available.

 

BTW-I am not a helicopter or overbearing parent-my kids have their own jack knives, BB guns, etc., and know how to use them properly, etc. They are very independent,etc, but I have heard too many bathroom horror stories, from people in my area.

 

 

This is something I'm still trying to figure out.

 

My sister tells me the police told her NOT to send her boys by themselves into the Men's restroom until they look like men. So she still takes them (11 and 9) into the women's restroom when they need to go.

[lincap]

Age 10 and 8, and only together:

 

Child safety experts generally agree that most kids are not able to handle an emergency or threat to their safety until around age 10. That's why it's best to avoid letting your child use public restrooms in large areas, such as those found in stadiums or movie theaters, or bathrooms with multiple entrances, without you.

 

http://childparentin...-by-himself.htm

 

 

 

That is helpful.

 

I wish there were more family restrooms around. Or at least restrooms with shorter sinks so kids can easily wash their hands. I remember in elementary school the bathrooms being child size toilets and lowered sinks. Why can't mens and ladies room have some lowered sinks?

 

For the pool. My kids (boys 3, 5 and 7) take swim lessons at a local college. They don't have a family changing room.. so I take them into the women's locker room, make noise, speak loud get them changed showered QUICK and out! I use their names so that people know they are boys. If we encounter a woman in the locker room, I say "we will be out as fast as possible". I tell my boys to look at their flip flops. There are 2 locker areas that have doors so anyone who wants privacy can go into one of those and two areas that are open. After swimming, we get changed quick and shower at home. Same thing "we will be out as fast as possible". Our swim instructor said the boys can go into the women's locker room until middle school age. Then they would be expected to navigate the men's locker room on their own. We haven't had problems there. One woman said it is too important to learn how to swim to worry about boys in the women's locker room.

[JuanitaL]

 

This is something I'm still trying to figure out.

 

My sister tells me the police told her NOT to send her boys by themselves into the Men's restroom until they look like men. So she still takes them (11 and 9) into the women's restroom when they need to go.

 

What does this mean? size? height? attitude? self-confidence? (facial hair? My boys all started shaving at 12 - like a rite of passage.)

[Guest]

I've always taken my son in with me, but I noticed a couple months ago that there were girls coming into the bathroom in pairs that were his age. (7) That was the point that I said it was probably time for him to stop coming in the ladies restroom. So, now I try to go to stores with family restrooms - I wish there were more! I wish I had a buddy for him; you with more than one boy are lucky in that regards.

[JuanitaL]

Our swim instructor said the boys can go into the women's locker room until middle school age. Then they would be expected to navigate the men's locker room on their own.

What age is that? Up to 6th grade? (I'm old - I was in elementary k-6th, then Jr High/High School.)

[lincap]

What age is that? Up to 6th grade? (I'm old - I was in elementary k-6th, then Jr High/High School.)

 

 

I don't even know... I was the same as you elementary then Jr High. So I think make 5th grade? so 10-12ish? I am bad at age/grade correlation!!!

[JuanitaL]

I've always taken my son in with me, but I noticed a couple months ago that there were girls coming into the bathroom in pairs that were his age. (7) That was the point that I said it was probably time for him to stop coming in the ladies restroom. So, now I try to go to stores with family restrooms - I wish there were more! I wish I had a buddy for him; you with more than one boy are lucky in that regards.

This is what I was wondering earlier. What is the social interaction between same age boys and girls when they meet up in the ladies room? 10 and 11 year old boys being taken to the restroom by their mom and then running into 10 and 11 year old girls?

[JuanitaL]

 

 

I don't even know... I was the same as you elementary then Jr High. So I think make 5th grade? so 10-12ish? I am bad at age/grade correlation!!!

*shrug*. I have now spent far too much of my day contemplating the ages and public restroom habits of complete strangers. But... it has been interesting.

[unsinkable]

 

 

 

I don't even know... I was the same as you elementary then Jr High. So I think make 5th grade? so 10-12ish? I am bad at age/grade correlation!!!

 

 

In the US, the majority of kids start Kindergarten when age 5

1st grade, kids usually are age 6 at the start.

So a quick way to do age and grade is to add 5 to the grade to get the age at the start of the grade.

 

So 5 th grade...usually starts at 10 years old.

 

Yes, there are exceptions. I understand that. It helps for a quick estimate.

 

[Whereneverever]

I asked here about public showers last year after running into this issue with a boy showering in the open communal showers. There were a lot of people who felt it was fine.

[Cera]

I really don't see what the big deal is when it comes to boys in the women's restroom. There are individual stalls unlike the men's restroom so there really isn't anything for them to see.

[AdventureMoms]

 

 

For the same reason that one car tapping its breaks can cause a traffic jam.

 

Seconds count. Men don't close a door. Don't lock a door. Don't turn around. Don't clean a seat ( if necessary) dont pull down their pants. Don't wipe. Don't pull up their pants. Don't unlock a door. Don't open a door.

 

All those seconds add up and then multiple by the number of women.

 

This, and also (some) women's clothing is more complicated and some women may have to deal with menstrual issues in addition to peeing. Plus women's bathrooms often have fewer actual places to pee - urinals take up less space than stalls, and women's toilets clog more often (more TP and feminine products) - and sometimes crowding due to women fixing makeup/spending more time at the mirror can slow things down. It is a lot of little stuff that adds up fast!

[AdventureMoms]

I wish I had a buddy for him; you with more than one boy are lucky in that regards.

 

 

I have been thinking that for a while. I am very happy my boys are twins! They have only moms, but at least they will always have a buddy for the bathroom.

[fraidycat]

DS started refusing to use the women's restroom with me at about 5.5 or 6 years old.

 

Totally off topic but yesterday we were out shopping and my family thought I was in the restroom so were standing outside, waiting for me. They witnessed both a full grown adult male and female each enter the wrong bathrooms. LOL They had their faces too buried in their phone screens to pay attention where they were going. The female came out right away and went to the correct one, but the man didn't notice he was in the wrong one until after he had taken care of business and was walking out. :lol:

 

I had been in and out and was off shopping at the time.

[MooCow]

 

Would you be fine with grown men walking into the Women's room with their 7 yo daughters?

 

 

 

I've actually had a dad or two ask me to take their daughters in with me while they wait outside.

As I have been told, I 'look' like a mom.

[Coco_Clark]

My oldest was 4 when he started to use the men's restroom on his own in small venues. By the time he was 5 he was using the men's room even in busy places, and waiting for me outside the women's room when I had to use it or take his younger brother in. I think it can all vary depending on the child's maturity, his experience, and the bathroom's location. My son is a mature 5, our family heavily values independence so he has been given a lot of it to practice with, and we don't live in a metro with sketchy areas. But I'll admit if I saw a boy over 7 or 8 in a women's bathroom I'd probably assume he either had some sort of special circumstance, or his mother was a bit overcautious. But that is me being judgmental. I'd be better off minding my own business.

[Joanne]

There were some situations I felt comfortable starting at school age (5). I feel more secure about *busy*, *local* bathrooms than empty or visitor ones (malls, airports, rest stops). I let my oldest go to the men's room alone consistently around 8? 9?

 

I wouldn't be bothered by a 7 year old in a women's room, and I don't think I'd even notice. But by double digit age? I believe it is inappropriate (and unnecessary). Statistically, public bathrooms are not the risk problem. And I believe most of the stories to be exaggerated if not outright urban legend. Like stranger-abuducted upper middle class white girls, they get publicity that way skews the actual risk and number of incidents.

 

Once again, kids are most and more at risk around known people: family, coaches, Pastors, teachers, etc.

[nd293]

We were recently in Singapore and many of the ladies' restrooms had a low urinal provided for boys, which I thought was interesting.

[musicianmom]

Well, my boy is only 3, but he's already uncomfortable about going in the ladies' room. So he'll be singing loudly in the men's room as soon as he can manage without help, I guess.

[Whereneverever]

 

 

I would not shower in an open communal shower except perhaps for a quick rinse with a suit on. I don't care if it is all women or green people from Mars. Do places even have stuff like that? I have not encountered it.

 

Def not my preference either, but our choices for swim lessons are pretty limited.

[LucyStoner]

For quiet places where I can see all exits? Around age 5-6, depending on if he was comfortable going in alone. For busy places where there are often more than one exit (like theme parks, stadiums, airports), around age 7, depending on the circumstances. At age 9 (almost 10), I can't even imagine my son being willing to go into the ladies room at all or even to use a family restroom unless he was the only person in there. I think he would die of embarrassment if I dragged him into the ladies room.

 

ETA: I really don't care what other people do. I've never looked twice at a boy in the women's room.

 

We are really lucky in that the places we have swam after our oldest was about 4 have always had private family shower rooms. I'd be ok with my older son using the men's shower room...if I could trust him to actually shower without me making him. :p

[LucyStoner]

I have a very assertive friend who did this at a football game. She was pregnant and showing at the time. Though there was a line at the men's room, it wasn't as long as the one for the women's room. She yelled out, "Make way! Pregnant woman coming through!" The men, either from shock, amusement, or deference, all moved over and let her in.

 

 

 

I've used the men's room quite a bit if there is no line though come to think of it, never with my sons (unless it was a single locked toilet, in which case I think it is absurd to have a little gender sign up anyways). Mostly I've done this when the men's room is empty and I will not make it through the women's restroom line without wetting my pants. If the men's room is not empty, oh well. It's not like I gawk at men urinating. No man has ever seemed bothered. I assume they think I have accidentally used the wrong restroom. One tried to pick me up on the way out. :lol:

[MomtoCandJ]

I wonder about dads and little girls. Dh rarely takes dd out alone because of the whole bathroom thing. Dd is 4, he does Walmart fine because of the family bathroom in the back but otherwise kinda freaks. He took her a few weeks ago and the family bathroom was closed so he sent her into the ladies room with another lady who had kids :) but I have no idea what he would do if he had to go.

[Scarlett]

Honestly I wouldn't bat an eye regardless of age....well older teen yeah that would be weird, but wouldn't bother me. I guess I am not that modest.,,then again I've gone in the men's bathroom before when the women's line was too long.

 

I took my ds in with me until he was 7 or 8 ...and after that if the bathroom was shady he just had to wait until later. There were a few awkward times when I would open the door and yell his name. Yeah he loved that.

[Dory]

I would not shower in an open communal shower except perhaps for a quick rinse with a suit on. I don't care if it is all women or green people from Mars. Do places even have stuff like that? I have not encountered it.

 

 

We have that here at our local pool. It makes me very uncomfortable when the mom's bring their 8yo boys in there when my dd is rinsing off. It happens enough that we just wrap her up and take her straight home after lessons now. I am uncomfortable enough with a bunch of naked women and girls all in the same room, adding older boys to it is just to much for me. My boys go to the guys side but they have been told (and have obeyed thus far) not to use the showers, just dry off with the towel, grab their shoes and come on out.

[Dahliarw]

We were recently in Singapore and many of the ladies' restrooms had a low urinal provided for boys, which I thought was interesting.

 

 

They had these in Japan too. And a lot of the restrooms had one sink that was low enough for a child to reach. Very child-friendly country!

[happi duck]

We've seen dads waiting outside the bathroom while the mom has a boy, sometimes an older boy, in the women's room...huh?

[RoundAbout]

I don't know. I've been thinking about this myself. Our local commuter train station has a sign that says "All children under 8 should be accompanied by an adult in bathrooms" so 8 seemed about right for me in public places.

[NASDAQ]

Recently I let my four-year-old go into the men's room at the museum. Predictably he decided mid-stream that he wanted me in there with him. Luckily I have no shame, and am really equally comfortable in either washroom. And there was no one trying to use the urinals at the time.

 

In general I don't have a problem letting my four-year-old use the men's room, but it might be different if the place were very crowded. He's closing in on five though. Closer to three he needed more assistance toileting himself.