umsami Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 So, since there were a lot of rumors out there after 9/11 that the Muslim community celebrated or wasn't remorseful enough (even though pretty much every Muslim country, organization, local mosque, etc. expressed outrage), consider this your unofficial apology for the two idiots. I have no idea what will come out as to motive, etc., but I really think that the Uncle got it right by saying that their motive was that they are "losers."  If you're Christian, and especially Baptist, imagine how you feel when people bring up the Westboro Baptist Church. Well, we kind of feel the same way about Muslim terrorists, only multiply it by a million...because as reprehensible as the WBC is, as far as I know, they haven't killed anybody.  I apologize on behalf of Muslims everywhere--those who pray five times per day, once per day, not at all, and anything in between.  I'm Caucasian, so I guess in a way I can officially apologize for the Caucusus region Muslims. Of course, I apologize for all the Muslims in every shade of brown as well.  I'm a convert (converted years before I married), so I apologize on behalf of the wife of the elder guy. I've seen lots of comments how could she not know? How could she marry him, etc.? I will give you my theory--but it is my opinion, only. He was convicted of domestic violence in 2009. I have no idea if it was with her or not. From all appearances, they lived apart. She lived with her parents and their daughter, he lived in Boston. So, it's not like she was with him on a daily basis. His starting to pray five times per day really isn't a sign of becoming radical, even if he didn't before. Many many many Muslims pray 5xday... and it does not mean you're going to blow somebody/some thing up. As somebody who works with domestic violence among immigrants, I can tell you that often children are used as pawns. They may not have divorced, in spite of the DV, because of fears of her daughter. It is not unusual for a controlling spouse from a non-Hague country to threaten taking the kids. She never would have seen her daughter again. Does that mean she wouldn't report him to the FBI if she suspected something? No...but it does explain (possibly why she didn't just divorce him.) It's not like we have a great relationship with Chechnya or Russia for that matter, and that they'd return her daughter. Once again, that's my theory, but I have no idea the facts of her situation.  I wear hijab most of the time (outside), but don't always...so consider this an apology from all those who dress more "traditionally" and those who do not. Part of it's a modesty thing, part of it's I'm growing out my hair after having to shave my head after DD brought home lice and the dermatologist told me my hair was just too thick for tx to be effective... and part of it is that it means a lot to my husband, who is Egyptian, and for me, it's an easy thing to do that makes him happy. We have an intercultural marriage, he gave up seeing his family pretty much more than once a year to be with me. I appreciate that.  There is absolutely no justification for killing innocent people in Islam. I don't care what your brother's friend heard, there isn't. I've read the Qur'an in its entirety, in context, and can say that without reserve. It doesn't matter if they're Muslim or not. It doesn't matter if they're in Boston or Baghdad or wherever. The true Islamic response was the one taken by the Underwear Bomber's father, a devout Muslim who tried to turn in his own son. The true Islamic response was the one taken by the parents of the DC young adults who they feared had gone to Pakistan, and contacted the FBI--even though they knew their kids would end up likely behind jail.  Also, please remember that the vast majority of victims of Muslim terrorists are Muslims. It happens in Iraq. It happens in Pakistan. But these people, who are Muslims and raised Muslim, know that regardless of what these guys say, it has nothing to do with the religion. (Benefit of being the majority religion in the country... why we don't get up in arms that so many Christians rape, murder, etc. or when a Christian does something horrific like Aurora, Oklahoma City, etc. (because we're a Christian majority country, of course most of the criminals will be Christian)).  And yes, Muslim countries all over the world, every mosque I know of, and every major Muslim organization I know of have condemned the bombings. Even Iran did. The president of Chechnya did. The Muslim Brotherhood gov't in Egypt did. Etc. Here are some of the statements: http://www.latimes.com/news/world/worldnow/la-fg-wn-boston-bombings-condemnation-20130416,0,1333595.story  On a side note, I have seen some discussion on some Muslim boards about organizing an effort to get trained scholars to go into radical forums/websites/youtube channels and refute the claims. I have no idea how that will proceed...but it's not like it's not happening.  So yes, I apologize. And please, if you see a woman in hijab, and you're really angry... think before you yell at her, or tell her to go back to where she came from, or whatever. For one thing, there's a chance that she's from here. For another thing, she didn't do it, and she is probably 1,000x more mortified and more angry at the actions of those two than you are.  OK, so I'm sorry. Please don't say that you didn't hear that the Muslims didn't apologize, or feel sorry, or whatever. Quote
GWOB Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Sweetie, big hugs. No apology needed. No general Muslim hate will ever come from this Christian household. Stupid radical hate (from all religions or non-beliefs), yes. General Muslim hate? Nope. I wish I could hug you right now and tell you that not all Christians hate all Muslims, but I'm sure you understand the idea. Quote
MomtoCandJ Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Thank you, though I do feel you shouldn't have have to apologize for a bunch of idiots who claim to have the same beliefs as you. Quote
unsinkable Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 (((Umsami))) Â I'm so sorry that you felt you had to write this, that there is so much space between people and so much misunderstanding. Â I blame the men who did this, not anyone or thing else. Quote
Desert Rat Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Umsami. I am so sorry that you feel you have to apologize for killers because you share a religion with them. Please know that there are people who are horrified that you are the target for irrational hatred. Thank you for your heartfelt words. They are never needed with me. I'm so sorry that there are those who would ignore even these words. My heart breaks for you and yours. Quote
Shahrazad Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Love this and feel exactly the same! Â And I apologize as well on behalf of niqaabis (women who cover their face) and bearded men in traditional garb (like my husband). I apologize on behalf of Arabs and middle-easterners (of Moroccans, Palestinians, Saudis, and Muslim Americans as that is where we all hail from). I apologize on behalf of people who practice their religion as closely according to the book as we can and try to implement each detail as possible. I apologize on behalf of students of our faith (as I actively study the religion). I tell you, this is NOT Islam and any Muslim who tries to say that it is is in fact a fool and a liar. Quote
Jennifer3141 Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 No apology is owed. This land is supposed to be for EVERYONE. I know there are minority factions that want to pretend otherwise but they are unAmerican, not you. Â You do not owe us an apology anymore than any American here needs to apologize for Adam Lanza or Timothy McVeigh. Evil and stupidity happen. And neither is unique to the USA. Quote
GWOB Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Love this and feel exactly the same! Â And I apologize as well on behalf of niqaabis (women who cover their face) and bearded men in traditional garb (like my husband),on women. I apologize on behalf of Arabs and middle-easterners (of Moroccans, Palestinians, Saudis, and Muslim Americans as that is where we all hail from). I apologize on behalf of people who practice their religion as closely according to the book as we can and try to implement each detail as possible. I apologize on behalf of students of our faith (as I actively study the religion). I tell you, this is NOT Islam and any Muslim who tries to say that it is is in fact a fool and a liar. You don't have to apologize either! Idiots come in every shape, size, color, religious denomination, creed, sexual orientation, gender, political preference, etc.. YOU are NOT to blame for these attacks. More hugs for you. Quote
Desert Rat Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Shahrazad, you owe no apologies either. I'm so sorry. Quote
SKL Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I know these events are always especially painful for my Muslim friends. :( It's sad that such things have to be said. Quote
MrsBasil Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 ((hugs)) What your wrote was beautiful, but you don't need to apologize. Â You didn't do it, Muslims didn't all do it, some guys who happened to be/claim Muslim as their religion did it. You are not responsible for the thugs, losers. and who ever else who just happens to share your faith. Or doesn't share your faith, but claims it. Or does share it, but has twisted it beyond recognition. Or anything. Â You are not responsible and people who claim otherwise need a slap upside the head. Hard. Quote
ktgrok Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 No apology should be needed. My thoughts are with you, and your family. I was at the hospital yesterday and the man before me was called back. His name was Muhammed, and I thought how hard it must be for him right now. And his pretty little daughter. So sad that people have to worry about this. Evil knows no boundaries, ethnicity, or religion. It is just evil, and we must not forget that. The darkness wants us to blame things like gender or nationality, so we will be unable to see the truth, that evil can be anywhere. Quote
Barb_ Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 This thread breaks my heart. That's all. I'm just really sad for all of us, but especially for the victims and for you guys who are the collateral damage. Quote
bettyandbob Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 It saddens me to think that you would think you needed to apologize or that anyone would expect you to apologize. The act of terror in Boston is not representative of the Muslim religion. Quote
RoughCollie Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I'm sorry that you feel you have to apologize, umsami. :grouphug: Â I think of terrorists, including the Boston terrorists, as psychopaths - the religion they claim is incidental. It's just their particular psychopathic frame of reference. Quote
jelbe5 Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Dear Sister, Â You do not need to apologize for terrorists who hurt innocents. They do not represent you, your people or your faith. They are just bad, just evil, period. That is all they represent - badness and evil. I am sorry for the hurt they have inflicted on others, including those from Russia, from Chechnya and those of the Muslim faith. Our great country is supposed to embrace freedoms and diversity. Sadly, these incidents of the few breed fear, ignorance, hate and continue this cycle of evil and violence. We must rise above this . . . Hugs to you. You are a courageous and inspiring woman. Quote
Um_2_4 Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I have been off the boards most of the day and almost posted in some threads then didn't. I'm glad to see that people here are realizing the difference. These guys were invited to the USA, and this is how they respond?? This is against all the rules of Islam. These guys are roped in by one extremist and can't see beyond the rage they feed them.These people are not ambassadors for Islam. Â Can I ask you guys one thing: When you see Muslims out in your daily life, smile? Â Right now my DH and I are having the same conversations as we did post 9/11, how safe is it for me to go out (I wear hijab and am obviously Muslim in a predominately non--ethnic area)? How many threats will our local center receive (not if, but how many)? I carry a diaper bag still (twins are still in pull ups when out, plus snacks etc) and I am considering switching to a small purse and leaving stuff in a bag in the car, why? Well I don't want people to get nervous when they see a white Muslim carrying what looks like a duffel bag. This will be my life for a while, just as it was after the last time. Last time, I had friends (women) that were physically assaulted I was told to "go home" (umm... I'm 1/8 th cherokee, I am home LOL and this person could not speak English well). I worked at a private Islamic school and we had to close down due to threats for 10 days and we reopened only with guards on campus. Â Â So when you see that obviously Muslim mama at the HS coop or out shopping, how about a smile? Cuz she is probably nervous and/or worried and/or unsure about peoples reactions. Quote
GWOB Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Ugh! You guys are making me cry! I think if I see a nice, sweet Muslim lady irl I will be that freaky person that just goes up to them and hugs them. So let me apologize to all the Muslim ladies who get randomly hugged by some weird, short, busty white girl. Quote
wingedradical Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 As a Christian, I am sorry your people have been misjudged by so many! Â I remember going to a restaurant the day after 9-11 and the server was a young Saudi man we'd met before. I asked him how it was going - if anyone had treated him badly - he said no one had at that point but that he and other local Saudis (mostly students at the university) were frightened and some were considering going back home because of fear. He then brought up the interment of Japanese Americans during WWII. Â I guess I was naive because I told him, "Oh, no! You don't have to worry about that. We learned our lesson on that." Â Well, of course, they aren't putting just anyone in interment camps but I am not happy about the treatment of American citizens under the so-call Patriot Act (oops..is that hot button?) and I have been shocked and saddened at the comments many of my fellow-religionists have made. It seems every religion has its share of ignorant and hateful people. In fact, ignorant and hateful people seem to use religion as their excuse. Â Grace and Peace to you. Quote
SKL Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I for one never thought "Islam" when I heard who had done it and where he was from. I thought "extremist maniac." Just like I don't think "oh, a Christian" when I see someone invoke Jesus as an excuse to disrespect/hurt someone else. Quote
GWOB Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Love this and feel exactly the same! Â And I apologize as well on behalf of niqaabis (women who cover their face) and bearded men in traditional garb (like my husband). I apologize on behalf of Arabs and middle-easterners (of Moroccans, Palestinians, Saudis, and Muslim Americans as that is where we all hail from). I apologize on behalf of people who practice their religion as closely according to the book as we can and try to implement each detail as possible. I apologize on behalf of students of our faith (as I actively study the religion). I tell you, this is NOT Islam and any Muslim who tries to say that it is is in fact a fool and a liar. Â Â I'm going to quote you again because my daddy, who is dying right now and is just on my Sudafed-high mind, has often been mistaken for Middle Eastern due to his dark olive skin and black-haired beard. I hate hate! (Does that make me a hater hater?) Looks can be deceiving. I studied phrenology while getting my degree. That's bogus science. Honestly? We cannot look at a human and determine their inherent "evilness". Sure, we can pretend to see their "evil eyes", but that's a bunch of illogical crap. Honey, Muslims are not inherently evil. Gosh, as a Christian, I wish I was as devoted as many Muslims out there. Quote
LaxMom Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 :grouphug: Â I appreciate your words, umsami and shahrazad, but I can't help but wonder what kind of people we (generally, our society, not the boards in particular) are that you feel the need to apologize for an act you are not related to, let alone culpable in. Shameful. Quote
Kathryn Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I am so sorry that you feel the need to write this. I know your fears as a Muslim in America are very real, and for that, I apologize. :grouphug: Quote
speedmom4 Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 (((Hugs))) You did not need to apologize. I think your comparison to the Westboro Baptist Church was spot on. I am not Baptist but I am a Christian and they so not represent me at all. I've always believed the same to be true about Muslims. I usually go out of my way to smile at women in traditional dress so they know that not all Caucasian Americans blame them. Your post breaks my heart. Â Blessings, Â Elise in NC Quote
delaney Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 No, I am sorry that you feel the need to write this. The thought should never have crossed your mind. Some days I would like to wave a wand and make everyone green with black hair and blue eyes. That way there would be no judging by appearances. Quote
stripe Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 No, I am sorry that you feel the need to write this. The thought should never have crossed your mind. Isn't that the truth. Â Some days I would like to wave a wand and make everyone green with black hair and blue eyes. That way there would be no judging by appearances. I like diversity of appearance, but I'd sure like to wave a wand and make everyone's brain work. Quote
elegantlion Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I wanted to add, that while I don't think you need to apology, I appreciate you and the other Muslim women on this board. I live in a non-diverse area. People who differ from the "average appearance" (think WASPy Old Navy meets Walmart) get extra looks around here, not right but it's a fact. It's not simply Muslim women, it's kids with goth style, people with purple or pink hair, boys with earrings. Â While not everyone looks at these type of people in fear, some do so out of ignorance. In my circle, I don't get the chance to interact with any Muslims on a regular basis. Over the years, posts by many of you have helped me with wording and understanding to use as I try to explain some of these differences to people who are ignorant. Many of these have created some great discussions between my son and me. I've been able to teach about these differences and tolerance of them using your words. Ds has a much greater view of diversity of faith and appearance because you all have taken the time to educate this board. I would not have had that opportunity had you all stayed silent over the years. So, thank you. Quote
mom2scouts Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Right after the bombing, our missions pastor posted an article on FB called something like, "I hope they're not Muslim!". The writer of the article feared that innocent Muslims would be in danger and wrongly stereotyped. After 9/11, our church invited someone from the local mosque to speak to us about what Islam really teaches. Please don't feel the need to apologize. Many Christians understand that a few evil people with extreme views do not represent the majority of Muslims. I live in a University community and often see women in hijabs. I'm curious, but never fearful. Quote
linders Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I'm so sorry you felt the need for this eloquent post, yet I know from various accounts that, once again, the religious background of these two is being generalized. Â Neither you, nor your fellow Muslims, should have to endure this. Quote
Kate in Arabia Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I think if I see a nice, sweet Muslim lady irl I will be that freaky person that just goes up to them and hugs them. So let me apologize to all the Muslim ladies who get randomly hugged by some weird, short, busty white girl. I totally ran into someone like that the day after the tragedy of 9/11. It was such a terrible time for so many reasons, and at the time I was quite taken aback by this person, but I can tell you she was a ray of light in some very dark days. Even thinking back on her now, all these years later, gives me a smile :) Quote
Aslana Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 None of the Muslims on this board should every feel the need to apologize, especially if they did nothing wrong. As I said in several other threads, I wish people (in general) would learn the difference in different types of Muslim belief. Just as their are Baptists and Protestants, there are Sunni and other "branches" (if you will. Don't know the correct name for it) of Muslim. Â Just because one "branch" goes bad, doesn't mean the whole tree is rotten. And I'm so sorry you feel the need to apologize for idiots that obviously do not represent your belief system and I am even more sorry that people (the general consensus, not here on this board) don't know the difference and furthermore, do not care. :( Â I defended your belief system after 9/11 to some of my own more radical (Christian) friends, and I'll defend your belief system now. Quote
mommymilkies Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 It really ticks me off that people are so blind and hurtful. (((Hugs))) Umsami Quote
Ohdanigirl Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: Â I am so sorry for what you and those around you must go through. Â Thank you for your words. They really do mean so much... Not because an apology from you was needed, but because it may really help us put things in perspective. Quote
linguistmama Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I'm so sorry that what these extremists did affects even more innocent people in this way! :grouphug: Quote
HRAAB Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 No words. Everyone else has expressed my thoughts. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote
fairy4tmama Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Thank you for your eloquence . your post is well-written and beautiful, however, I am deeply saddened that you felt the need to write it. I am sorry for all the intolerance you face. :( Quote
LibraryLover Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I've always tried show kindness in my own town, or elsewhere. I been flying quite frequently these days, and even before Boston, I always try to smile or, if appropriate, make light chit-chat with obviously Muslim women while I am in the security line, or anywhere in the airport etc, as I think that is where people still feel more threatened. Â When I was in NYC this week, the park, the zoo etc., I understood Muslim women might be worried/on edge being out and about with their children. I can only imagine how upsetting and scary it must feel to get nasty stares or comments directed at me or mine. Lots of us are really trying to show our humanity and compassion, in small ways; smiling at women or their dear children, chatting lightly (lovely day, cuteness of the children etc) when it seems appropriate (in line for snacks or the like) . I hope we begin to outnumber those who are unkind, or worse. Quote
UmMusa Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I'm impressed with all the responses stating that she doesn't need to apologize. However, I often do get the question of "well, why aren't Muslims speaking out against the atrocities, making noise, making statements?" So, i do understand why umsami made the first post. I suppose it doesn't hurt to go ahead and reaffirm and restate that Islam does not tolerate or encourage such terror. Â Thanks to all the moms here (and dads) who are considerate. Quote
Alte Veste Academy Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I'm impressed with all the responses stating that she doesn't need to apologize. However, I often do get the question of "well, why aren't Muslims speaking out against the atrocities, making noise, making statements?" So, i do understand why umsami made the first post. I suppose it doesn't hurt to go ahead and reaffirm and restate that Islam does not tolerate or encourage such terror. Â Thanks to all the moms here (and dads) who are considerate. Â I think there is a difference between speaking out and apologizing. People shouldn't have to apologize for something they didn't do, although I can understand why umsami wrote what she did. I imagine it is an incredibly frustrating and heartbreaking position to be in. I was so sad to read it. It took me a few hours to even decide to "like" it because I so incredibly dislike the idea that a completely blameless person felt compelled to write it. Â This all makes me sad and sick. My favorite thing about America has always been diversity, how people from different backgrounds are supposed to feel welcome and inspired to pursue happiness in their own way. This Pollyanna is losing her ability to play The Glad Game as easily as she used to. Quote
GTJo1996 Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I am soo proud of us Hive people! We are a loving bunch of folks! But then we are also clearly a well educated bunch and that makes us less likely to jump on the "hate wagon". So, bravo, hive members! I am proud to be among you! Â Quote
Dandelion Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 I think there is a difference between speaking out and apologizing. People shouldn't have to apologize for something they didn't do, although I can understand why umsami wrote what she did. I imagine it is an incredibly frustrating and heartbreaking position to be in. I was so sad to read it. It took me a few hours to even decide to "like" it because I so incredibly dislike the idea that a completely blameless person felt compelled to write it. Â This all makes me sad and sick. My favorite thing about America has always been diversity, how people from different backgrounds are supposed to feel welcome and inspired to pursue happiness in their own way. This Pollyanna is losing her ability to play The Glad Game as easily as she used to. Â Well said. I feel the same way. Â :grouphug: to you, Umsami. Quote
Mommyfaithe Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 Thank you, though I do feel you shouldn't have have to apologize for a bunch of idiots who claim to have the same beliefs as you. Â I agree. And I am speechless.....a very rare occasion. Quote
MercyA Posted April 21, 2013 Posted April 21, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: , umsami. Bigotry disgusts me. I am so sorry you felt the need to post this. Quote
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