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swimmermom3

Trying to be gracious about prom

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Oh yes. Prom nightmares. My white bread self decided I'd use a tanning booth so I'd not look quite so pale in my midnight blue dress. Got hives. Mummy Dearest mistakenly gave sobbing me rx hemorrhoid cream instead of anti-itch cream. The rx didn't do anything for the itch, but it did literally strip my newly done acrylic nails off! Oh and my hair? Yeahhh. Awful. It looked awesome in the salon, walked out into the humidity/light rain and it turned into flat plastic. Ran back into salon and an hour later every women in the salon was about ready to cry with me bc they couldn't make my hair do anything. Finally get home, get some benedryl in the system, which made me kind of woozy and want to nap the entire night.

 

The good news is my future dh didn't remember any of it.

 

Because he had a major insulin reaction due to becoming intolerant to his insulin. Because I was in such a fog, I just thought he was miserable to be with me. Called the next morning after sleeping off the benedryl and his mom said he was in bed recovering and his last clear memory was detailing his dad's car, but he couldn't remember why. That was 2 days before prom!

 

Thank God we didn't drink any alcohol and had called it a night by 11pm!

 

The next year poor future dh really wanted to come into town from college to go to my prom so I'd have a positive experience.

 

Nope. Not interested. I think we just went to the movies instead.

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That must by why the statistics on teenaged male drivers are so good.

 

Well if you are going to go by that, then don't let them drive any day of the year until they are 21. Teen drivers statistics suck because they are teen drivers and teen drivers lack experience.

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You know we're waiting for the pictures, right? :toetap05:

 

 

 

;) ;) ;) ;)

 

Oh, I want to see your homecoming picture, complete with mum. Because I'm sure that if you were well considered enough to be Prom Queen, you probably had a doozy.

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Ummm . . . while my son is known in certain circles, I hardly think he and his friends are in danger of being chased around the city by crazed paparazzi.

 

True, but the people have posted this have mentioned the other possibly intoxicated teen aged drivers. They will still be out there, whether you are in a limo or not. And my guess is that the limo folks don't make you wear seat belts; just like with real princesses. So I was responding by pointing out that the limo is no real safety item unless of course you think your kids is going to drink and drive themselves.

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True, but the people have posted this have mentioned the other possibly intoxicated teen aged drivers. They will still be out there, whether you are in a limo or not. And my guess is that the limo folks don't make you wear seat belts; just like with real princesses. So I was responding by pointing out that the limo is no real safety item unless of course you think your kids is going to drink and drive themselves.

 

Yes. Exactly what I was thinking. I've never been in a limo that had seatbelts. Tho I'll grant I've also never had exactly Cadillac type limo rides either. Midrange quality I'd think is the limit of my limo experience. All my kids have been in a limo once or more except my babies and thats why I remember the no seatbelts. All my kids were like, "so if we wreck we'll all just toss into each other like rolling in a can?" and that devolved into a disucssion of whether the boys had ever seen a limo car chase on tv or movies and that's what I listened to all the way to watch A Christmas Carol performance downtown.

 

And that was a rare Christmas present from my husband. A limo ride and tickets to a performance for me and all the kids except babies. I wouldn't have gone if I'd had to drive bc I absolutely hate driving my big van downtown and night glare was really hard on my eyes. It's a nightmare of traffic and parking. This way dh stayed home with the babies. The limo was nice but for our purposes it was just the only taxi that could seat us all. :)

 

It was quite fun and I wish we could afford to make it an annual tradition. Fond memory.

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The limos we've used have always had seat belts, but I'm not entirely sure a carload of teenagers will use them even if they are available.

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How we handle money in our house -- My kids have all worked before the end of high school so they had a reasonable sum of money tucked away in the bank. Our rules for their money -- 10% to the church, 50% into "long-term savings" (i.e. college) and 40% into short-term savings. The 40% is theirs to spend as they see fit. For the most part the money has stayed in the bank accumulating non-existent interest, but each kid has done at least one surprising thing with a bit of the money. Dh and i just remember that it is THEIR money -- they earned it and they can spend it as they like.

 

The portion I underlined made me chuckle sadly.

 

I still remember the time I mis-spent a trivial sum of money while in downtown Boston. Thankfully it was only ~$30, but in junior high that was a LOT of money to me. Ever since, when tempted to spend, I ask myself if the item is another Faneuil Hall lure.

 

My similar splurge was also a thirty dollar item; in my case, it was a silver cuff bracelet bought in the Netherlands when I was about twelve. My pocket money (from babysitting) at that time for the six week trip was $100. I've never worn the bracelet though I still have it.

 

It is my hope that a group of students somewhere gets together for an Anti-prom. Have a potluck dinner, wear jeans if you want or vintage clothing from the thrift shop. Rent bicycles-built-for-two for transportation. Have Mom and Aunt Lulu pull out their old tablecloths and light up the tiki candles.

 

I never attended a prom, but I'd have loved to attend such an Anti-prom. I'd still like to attend.

 

I think these are wonderful insights. I went to high school in Texas too. The mums. The MUMS! :lol:

 

You just brought back a memory of junior high in Texas. (One of the fifteen schools I attended from Kindergarten through twelfth grade.) I was invited to homecoming by a young man. In homeroom that morning, I received an enormous creation of mum (mums?) with black and yellow ribbons (with names in glitter) and a small bumblebee ornament. Actually, two arrived as my sister (at another school) was double dating with us. Since I was new to Texas, the experience was new to me. I'd forgotten all about that until now.

 

Ds did have the conversation with his girlfriend and there will be no compromise. ....

 

Anyway, ds was pretty quiet tonight. He finally said, "Mom, I don't get it. There are two of us going to the prom; it's our prom, but what I think doesn't matter, even though it is my money?" I think he now knows the answer to that question. During his conversation tonight, there were several complicated reasons as to why they needed to have dinner at the restaurant and to see if they could still get a 10 person limo which is over twice as much as the 8 person limo because of an extended time commitment. My son very slowly agreed to everything. I watched his face watch her expression when he said "yes." Sometimes it is very hard to be a parent.

 

Lisa,

 

Your son sounds like a wonderful and thoughtful young man. I'm sorry to hear that this experience has been so challenging for him.

 

I'm clearly an obtuse person who needs everything clearly spelled out. What did his face reflect?

 

Regards,

Kareni

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Oh yes. Prom nightmares.

 

Ooh, are we telling funny prom stories now? Mine is not nearly as good as yours but the year I went to Senior Prom my boyfriend/date got the chicken pox on prom night. A couple weeks prior he came over to my house and my mom told him not to come in unless he'd had CP because my little brother had an active case. Boyfriend was sure he'd had them so he came in. Well two weeks later, whadayaknow? We managed to eat dinner and dance a couple songs before calling it a night. Yeah. *That* is what makes a prom memorable. :laugh:

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Sadly, I hope Lisa's son wises up before facing this same type situation with wedding costs. She sounds like a high maintenance gal.

 

I am NOT looking forward to this type of thing in the future... :grouphug:

 

 

*went to Burger King with my date for my own prom & wore the crown to prom as proof -- it was the only way I'd be crowned 'queen' that night*

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Well if you are going to go by that, then don't let them drive any day of the year until they are 21. Teen drivers statistics suck because they are teen drivers and teen drivers lack experience.

 

True, but the people have posted this have mentioned the other possibly intoxicated teen aged drivers. They will still be out there, whether you are in a limo or not. And my guess is that the limo folks don't make you wear seat belts; just like with real princesses. So I was responding by pointing out that the limo is no real safety item unless of course you think your kids is going to drink and drive themselves.

 

Research certainly shows that teen males are, statistically, among the least safe drivers on the roads. And I've read studies suggesting that having passengers in the car makes the odds even worse. Even though we weren't drinking and driving and were, essentially, good kids, I could tell you stories about riding around in friends' cars that would make you faint.

 

My point was simply that I think a group of giddy teens being driven around in the back of a larger, recent-model vehicle by an experienced, adult driver is probably safer than that same group of giddy teens being driven around by an inexperienced, teen guy. That just seems like a no-brainer to me.

 

Now, if we begin from the presumption that the driver(s) of the family car(s) in which the group will travel are all better-than-average, trustworthy drivers who can be completely counted upon to take the responsibility of driving their friends around with appropriate gravity, and we assume that every vehicle in which they will be travelling has been properly maintained (since I'm assuming a licensed limo service would have to submit its vehicles for periodic safety checks) and that the kids riding around in these cars wear their seatbelts, then, sure, that's probably "safe enough" to cover most situations. For me, though, I'd be willing to kick in the $80-odd for a little extra insurance and to make the night more fun for them.

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*went to Burger King with my date for my own prom & wore the crown to prom as proof -- it was the only way I'd be crowned 'queen' that night*

 

You rock! I love it.

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You ladies have been both busy and opinionated since I was last able to be on here. :D

 

Thank you all for your advice, opinions, and experiences. I had no idea that prom was such an emotionally charged event and sort of wish I had remained oblivious like I did for dd's proms.

 

I would like to extend a hearty thanks to the poster several pages back who suggested that my dh go into the tux rental store with my son. Ds had already ordered his tuxedo and put down a deposit, but had forgotten his $50 off coupon, which turned out to only give him $10 off. They went to Men's Wearhouse and rented the same tux for $100. That was a $45 savings.

 

The final plans are that the limo will pick up all ten kids, drive them to a local park, that they all have grown up hanging out at, for a photo shoot, take them to dinner close by at Stanford's, and then on to the prom. Three of the kids (including our son) will have cars parked downtown for the ride home. They are all going to a house two doors down from us where they will hang out the rest of the night watching movies and playing board games. They are a good group of kids so the parents are comfortable with this plan.

 

Just to clear up a few points, ds is not currently employed. His funds are from a summer job that he may not have this summer. The job market here for teens is very tight. That is why he was concerned about the cost. It will take a while to recover the funds and frankly, he does not value the prom as highly as his girlfriend does. Before that summer job of moving freight, ds was pretty free with his money. Hard manual labor made him value a dollar a lot more.

 

His girlfriend is in no way a bad person; she is just young and I would say, a bit clueless. She was delighted that they are taking the limo, but not very happy about paying for her portion. Remember, the girls agreed to do that because they wanted the limo in the first place. She mentioned how long it would take her to make the cost up at work. I don't think my ds was feeling very sympathetic. She said this after another young woman in the group at our house had nixed a more expensive restaurant saying that she couldn't expect her date to pay $30 a plate for dinner and that she herself wouldn't spend that much. I could have hugged her.

 

Ds and his girlfriend have been dating since September and seem to enjoy each other's company. It is unfortunate to have this misunderstanding, but probably a good thing for the long run.

 

Obviously from the posts on this thread, there is no one right way to manage the prom.

 

On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

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On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

May he find just that type of individual. :grouphug:

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On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

Sounds like he's a candidate for Aunt Jane's Anti-prom. My husband's ideal prom would have involved kayaks, so I totally get this!

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I was wondering whether your son is genuinely interested in the prom, wanting to make his girlfriend happy, or just "swimming with the fish in the customary flow". I don't think any girl has the right to expect so much money to be spent on her behalf by a high school date. I admire your son's common sense and creative thoughts for alternatives.

 

I'm always surprised that proms still exist. I was graduated from a large urban high school, but the prom costs were modest. My mother made my [very beautiful] dress, my boyfriend bought me a simple corsage, he drove us there-and-back, and the PTA parents threw a lavish breakfast for the post-party meal. As for the prom itself, it was a total bore. Some unthinking people secured a club at the Astrodome. It was a narrow facility running in a circle around the dome. Extremely crowded, impossible to visit with people whom one barely could distinguish in the near darkness (goofy lights did not illumine the room usefully), horribly noisy, . . . Frankly, the high school prom was the LEAST important event of my life.

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On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

That sounds like way more fun to me than my actual prom was.

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Before that summer job of moving freight, ds was pretty free with his money. Hard manual labor made him value a dollar a lot more.

 

:hurray:

 

On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

 

Now you make me think of venetian gondola. That is after your whole thread already made me think of debutante balls, Molly Ringwald, Footloose and Grease. :laugh:

Maybe date a marine biologist :lol:

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Sounds like he's a candidate for Aunt Jane's Anti-prom. My husband's ideal prom would have involved kayaks, so I totally get this!

 

 

:D Both of my boys and probably my dd too would sign up for Aunt Jane's Anti-prom. I have read all of the posts on here and everything is running together, but the post about the prom in the barn sounded like so much fun. I enjoyed reading about the alternatives paths that people took to enjoy their prom or in making their children's proms memorable.

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Sounds like he's a candidate for Aunt Jane's Anti-prom. My husband's ideal prom would have involved kayaks, so I totally get this!

 

My husband's ideal prom involved no dancing and no other people, except for me. He does seem to tolerate me. Why he and I went to four proms in a row (his junior and senior, then my junior and senior), I'm really not sure. I do have a lovely collection of gowns in the attic, though, and he did look awfully smashing in his tux. :)

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

 

No, you are not. My guys prefer jeans and a tshirt for daily living, but they like feeling sharp and snazzy looking sometimes too. Getting extra cleaned up, with a fresh hair cut and shave with a proper fitting jacket and tie makes them feel quite manly too. It makes a night out A Night Out.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

Nope. My DS owns a tux, 3 dress shirts, 2 slacks and 3 bowties. I am pretty sure he has had at least one suit that fits him since he was a toddler. Thankfully, they are as cheap as regular clothes at this age.

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I was wondering whether your son is genuinely interested in the prom, wanting to make his girlfriend happy, or just "swimming with the fish in the customary flow". I don't think any girl has the right to expect so much money to be spent on her behalf by a high school date. I admire your son's common sense and creative thoughts for alternatives.

 

I'm always surprised that proms still exist. I was graduated from a large urban high school, but the prom costs were modest. My mother made my [very beautiful] dress, my boyfriend bought me a simple corsage, he drove us there-and-back, and the PTA parents threw a lavish breakfast for the post-party meal. As for the prom itself, it was a total bore. Some unthinking people secured a club at the Astrodome. It was a narrow facility running in a circle around the dome. Extremely crowded, impossible to visit with people whom one barely could distinguish in the near darkness (goofy lights did not illumine the room usefully), horribly noisy, . . . Frankly, the high school prom was the LEAST important event of my life.

 

I don't know that I could say that my son is genuinely interested in the prom, but he is genuinely interested in the girl, and there is definitely some of that "swimming with the fish in the customary flow." He is a social kind of guy and going to school dances isn't a new experience, nor is dining out in a good restaurant. This will be the first time he has worn a tux and since he enjoys dressing up, that is okay. The limo will be a new experience, but he has danced at the venue before for a wedding. He genuinely thought his girlfriend would like a romantic dinner for two.

 

Outside of the Astrodome, everything else sounds great, Orthodox6. I would love to see photos of some of the prom dresses that were homemade. A friend has photos of her mom's dance dresses that she and her my friend's grandmother made. They are absolutely beautiful and very classy.

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Nope. My DS owns a tux, 3 dress shirts, 2 slacks and 3 bowties. I am pretty sure he has had at least one suit that fits him since he was a toddler. Thankfully, they are as cheap as regular clothes at this age.

My very casual son is known to don a bow tie on occasion. When he attended banquets and certain state affairs for 4-H, he was the go-to guy for those needing help tying their ties. But he only tied a bowtie for himself. The other guys wore traditional ties.

 

I suppose that this is one of those life skills we should mention whenever someone brings up the list: know how to tie a tie. Know how to tie a bowtie if you have the inclination.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

When my DH gets dressed up, he likes to do it up well. He picked a really snazzy tux for our wedding.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

My son's nickname in the summer is Tarzan, he hates layers or shirts. He hates belts or tucking in shirts. I blame private school prek and K for that. He might do a bow tie, I can see him do that. He doesn't own a suit.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

Both my guys have beautiful suits, shirts, and ties courtesy of their grandmother. My oldest son has dress blues for Civil Air Patrol, which also provides the training for ironing creases within an inch of one's life and polishing shoes to perfection. It was kind of a hoot watching my son carry his ironing board and iron into a meeting for Color Guard and having his commanding officer asks him how he was doing. "Outstanding, sir!" No salute. Iron was in the way.

 

All my kids love dressing up, but they also like spending their money on unique experiences. Their father has trained us all well. Dd can do serious glamor on a dime - or not much more.

 

ETA: Dh likes to dress up as well and owns a tux with a couple different cumberbands and ties. When we met in college, he had the "granola" look going on complete with rag wool socks and Birkenstocks. When he showed up to take me out for my birthday dinner, I nearly tripped over my chin checking him out in his suit and then proceeded to drool through dinner. I am a bit shallow that way - or at least when it comes to dh.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

My dh hates it. He wears suits and ties to work everyday, but when he walks in the door the tie is already undone as is his shirt. :drool5: I'm glad he doesn't like to get dressed up outside of work, though, because I'm not a big fan either.

 

My brother thinks dressed up is wearing a button shirt and jacket with his boots and jeans. My dad did wear the top half of a tux with tails for my wedding, but it was paired with boots and jeans. None of the men in my world own a tux.

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On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

 

Did I mention that I spoke with son 1.o yesterday? I mentioned my idea of sending son 2.o down to your place watch the festivities with your younger son, and my big boy said, "OHMYGOSH! Can you imagine?! The commentary would be hysterical. They'd be like those two grumpy muppets." That was exactly the right image. Maybe it's some kind of coping mechanism (lalalalaIdon'twanttothinkaboutprom!) but I just really enjoy cracking myself up thinking about our youngest two in cahoots.

 

And yes. I do pity that girl. But I trust there are girls out there who would be totally down with that plan.

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My very casual son is known to don a bow tie on occasion. When he attended banquets and certain state affairs for 4-H, he was the go-to guy for those needing help tying their ties. But he only tied a bowtie for himself. The other guys wore traditional ties.

 

I suppose that this is one of those life skills we should mention whenever someone brings up the list: know how to tie a tie. Know how to tie a bowtie if you have the inclination.

 

And, as long as we're hijacked, I'll share this: it's a very valuable life skill.

 

A couple weeks ago, my older son was offered a job at his college, a job that he hadn't even applied for — he found out about it late, and was graciously offered an interview; he was the only one of the candidates who showed up dressed appropriately, dress shirt and tie. He's pretty sure that is the reason he got the job, since they were all equally qualified. He felt a little bit guilty about it, but I, mom the mom, just thought, as the kids say: Bam.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

 

Nope, definitely not the only ones. As I said, my son's daily wear of choice includes dress pants, Oxford, vest, tie and fedora. It's casual if he's not wearing a jacket with a pocket square to match the tie.

 

He loved wearing a rented tux (complete with top hat and cane) when he took his sister to the Tony Awards and has been working hard to convince me it's time to buy him his own.

 

One of the big attractions of prom for him would definitely be the opportunity to dress to the nines.

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I have one son who loves to wear bowties and a tweed jacket. He heads off to church each Sunday looking like a well-dressed professor!

 

And I have one son who has long hair, prefers going barefoot, and only wears a coat and tie under duress. Two different girls invited him to their proms last year (and provided tickets) so his total outlay (other than the corsages) was a coordinating tie, which he bought at a consignment store for $4. (Rather conveniently for him both girls wore the same color dress!) He would rather put money into his sailboat than into his clothes!

 

Clearly this male formal dress thing is NOT genetically linked!

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I have one son who loves to wear bowties and a tweed jacket. He heads off to church each Sunday looking like a well-dressed professor!

 

 

Or Doctor Who.

 

170px-Eleventhdoctornew.jpg

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HOpefully the OP is still reading this. Just wanted to offer some practical suggestions, in the hopes some/one might work. First, check out the cost of renting a few nice cars for the group, rather than a limo. Or two smaller limos rather than one big one. A few nice shiny rental cars might be cheaper, and everyone would fit.

 

As for dinner, call some restaraunts and see about a fixed menu for the group, for a discount. With tip added on already. So the kids know exactly what to budget for and can easily pay. Smaller, local places would be more likely to do this I think, but call several places. Maybe mom can do this to help out?

 

If that doesn't work, see if the whole group would be interested in picking up catered food and sparkling cider and doing it at a park? Maybe JUST talk to the guys, and arrange it as a surprise for the girls? I'm thinking candlelight, white linen tablecloth, fancy horsdourves/food. It would still be cheaper than eating in a restaruant and so romantic. A parent could have it all set up and waiting for them when they got there, then make themselves scarce until clean up time. I'm thinking twinkling lights in the trees even, if possible.

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His girlfriend is in no way a bad person; she is just young and I would say, a bit clueless. She was delighted that they are taking the limo, but not very happy about paying for her portion. Remember, the girls agreed to do that because they wanted the limo in the first place. She mentioned how long it would take her to make the cost up at work. I don't think my ds was feeling very sympathetic. She said this after another young woman in the group at our house had nixed a more expensive restaurant saying that she couldn't expect her date to pay $30 a plate for dinner and that she herself wouldn't spend that much. I could have hugged her.

 

Good to know she has sensible friends!

 

 

 

On a lighter note, I pity the girl that is invited to our youngest son's senior prom. Our whole family has visions of some poor girl in her lovely gown decked out with a pfd and gray neoprene booties, dining on soggy chicken strips and Cheetos on a tiny sailboat in the middle of the river. :tongue_smilie:

 

 

Except for the food, this sounds rather romantic. I'll always remembering the end of Romancing the Stone; the boat was probably a little bigger in that though.

 

If you get there, I can suggest more romantic boat food!

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

 

Not at all. Dh LOVES his tux. We bought one for him several years ago when I was still performing a lot because it was cheaper than having him rent several times per year. He also wears suits to work once or twice per week now that he's at an executive level. Eldest boy has a black suit and chooses to wear it to church regularly.

 

The rocket team will be attending another congressional breakfast. Suits or sports coats and pants plus dress shirts and ties for the boys. Professional clothing for the gals. Only two of the six boys are whining about the dressing up part. The other four are fine with it. One of the girls, our "I'd rather be in ripped jeans, sweatshirt, and mucking out boots over anything else, ever" veterinarian wannabe member, is whining about dressing up. Her sister is more than happy about it. Dress up used to be normal for me both when I was still working as a professional pianist as well as teaching at the Lutheran school where the faculty had a dress code. My closet used to be full of gowns and lots of black dresses. Not so much these days.

 

Though my middle boy prefers cowboy wear, the reality is it's pretty normal for us. The boys dressed down when we went to Michigan Tech for tours and eldest ds's interview. They wore nice khaki's, white button downs, brown loafers, and the 16 year old being interviewed had a tie. I still wore professional clothes and DH wore his suit. But, even though we were nine hours from home, dh was likely to encounter professionals in his industry some of whom would be associated with his employer so it was important that he not be hanging around casually.

 

So, the boys are generally used to dressing up and really do not mind it.

 

Faith

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Outside of the Astrodome, everything else sounds great, Orthodox6. I would love to see photos of some of the prom dresses that were homemade. A friend has photos of her mom's dance dresses that she and her my friend's grandmother made. They are absolutely beautiful and very classy.

 

 

I doubt that many people these days would care for the modest (in appearance) dress that my mother made. In 1973, my friends thought it beautiful. Long sleeves, ankle-length, collarless. White satin dress overlain completely by a white, ribbon-like weave fabric. (The sleeves were made of this second fabric, only.) I can't describe the outer layer well. It had holes all over the fabric which allowed the satin under-fabric to gleam through. So there was both texture contrast, and contrast of lighting, with the shiny fabric gleaming through the holes of the matte-finish upper layer. . . . Blue velvet ribbon tied around the slightly-raised waistband, with the long ends dangling in back.

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I doubt that many people these days would care for the modest (in appearance) dress that my mother made. In 1973, my friends thought it beautiful. Long sleeves, ankle-length, collarless. White satin dress overlain completely by a white, ribbon-like weave fabric. (The sleeves were made of this second fabric, only.) I can't describe the outer layer well. It had holes all over the fabric which allowed the satin under-fabric to gleam through. So there was both texture contrast, and contrast of lighting, with the shiny fabric gleaming through the holes of the matte-finish upper layer. . . . Blue velvet ribbon tied around the slightly-raised waistband, with the long ends dangling in back.

 

 

Oh yes, by today's standards, my gorgeous evening gowns would be boring, though still very appropriate with the black tie crowd and timeless in terms of what to wear on stage. From the things I see in the stores around here, cheap and trashy plus WAY too much tulle, seems to be "in". But, according to my high school teacher friend, there is always a girl or two at the prom that chooses something timless, elegant, rather Audrey Hepburn"ish", and when they enter, the whole room kind of goes "ooooo, ahhhhh". However, it's always a girl from seriously monied families unless mom or grandma happens to be an excellent seamstress. These kinds of dresses tend to be $400.00 and up kinds of gowns, while the local bridal store sells the bulk of their prom gowns in the $150.00-250.00 range.

 

My mom makes dd's gowns...she has three for formal events she's been to and they are truly gorgeous. I think we had about $75.00 in fabrics in them on average. In college, I just couldn't afford to buy my performance clothes. Mom made 8 gowns for me to rotate through and rarely spent more than $25.00 or $30.00 (way back in the mists of time) to make them. Ahhhhhh....the good ole' days.

 

Have you seen the duct-tape prom dresses? Our honorary daughter helped a friend make one. Apparently, duct-tape has a contest for best prom dress made from their brand of tape and there is some prize money attached. The gown hdd helped make was from duct-tape feathers. They had to form hundreds of these things and then attached them to layers of duct-tape that formed the bodice and skirt. She said her friend nearly sweat to death in the contraption and it was VERY heavy. Oh, the things teens will do today!

 

Faith

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I don't get why the girls are involved in the planning at all. If he asks her, then he gets to plan and decide what happens. She should be thrilled she got asked! Is that normal nowadays? Do the girls help plan it too? Weird. I liked that he planned and I was just happy with whatever it was.

 

Prom was a big deal for me. I loved it and looked forward to it for a long time. It's like that for a lot of girls. But it's not about the money. I admit I get irritated with the guys that don't go to prom citing that money is the reason. It seems like there are so many girls that would be so completely thrilled to be asked and simply get to go....but hearing about girls like this makes me understand a little better I guess.

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Don't they usually serve dinner at Prom? My oldest went to two proms her senior year because she went to a different high school from her boyfriend (in a district where she went through Junior High so she had many friends there), and both served a nice dinner which was part of the ticket price.

 

She did buy two dresses (actually three since she bought one on a trip that ended up not working) but she's a good bargain shopper so only one was over $100. She bought shoes for two of them but shoes she could wear again. They split the cost of tickets - I think she bought the ones for her prom and he bought the ones for his - and the limo, which I think they only had for hers since that's what that group of friends was doing. The kids all got together at one persons house to do pictures and have snacks before hand, and returned there after for more social time. This was a HUGE house on a lake so the pictures are gorgeous.

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

DH doesn't like to dress up, but both our boys do. DS19 didn't go to his prom last year since his girlfriend still lived out of state, but he's excited about the tux he's rented for their wedding in a few weeks. DS15 gets to wear a bow tie, which he thinks is just awesome.

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Here is my $.02 worth........

 

IF he spends this money (whatever the amount, just more than HE is prepared to spend) how will he feel about himself and his actions IF she breaks up with him one week later?

 

For me, I would ask this question to myself and base my actions on the answer.

High school is fleeting, the emotions are high, but not long lasting. If they had been dating for a couple of years this would be different, but since September??? Meh..

 

I wouldn't have let DH spend that much on me until we were engaged (and he was 30).

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OK, I don't want to hijack the thread, but are my dh and ds the only two guys who like to get dressed up? My guys are both very happy in suits or tuxes, My brother and his sons dressed up a lot, too, and they all seemed to like it, but I'm getting the impression that our family may be the exception to the rule.

 

 

My husband could show up for an event completely and totally inappropriately dressed and not even really notice. Seriously. I chose his tux for our wedding.

 

We don't go out much. :tongue_smilie:

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Is anyone else seeing "Trying to be gracious about P*RN"??? LOL

 

I went to my prom in a home made dress with my cousin. I don't think I"m prepared to answer this question adequately.

 

 

I went to my senior prom in a borrowed dress. I fixed my own hair. I didn't decide to go until 2 days before.....I had fun, but there is no way I would spend a ton of money on that one high school night.

 

 

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