JAWM: Every once in a while, I feel jealous of public school moms. . .

[StephanieZ]

Yes, yes, I love hs'ing. Always done it, always wil. Loads of positives . .. Yes, yes.

 

That said. . .

 

Today is standardized testing day. I unexpectedly lucked into a friend driving my kids both ways, as I'd offered to do it for her, as she is preparing for a move so very busy, but she couldn't take me up on it since she had already committed to proctor a room. So, then she, at the last minute, had room in her van for my kids.

 

So, I was awake, ready for the day, and had the house to myself from 9 until now, 3. The kids are due home soon.

 

I cleaned my whole house (except the kids rooms). Bathrooms, kitchen, floors, laundry, clutter. I mostly packed for my trip this weekend. I did all the laundry and put it away. I even cleaned off the clutter on my desk and various other surfaces. I watched an hour of a silly documentary. I took care of some business calls. It is three, my house is perfectly clean, I could easily begin dinner now, and I could greet my kids with cookies and a smile.

 

Regular days do not go like this.

 

If my kids were in school most days, then I imagine most days could be this way. I could be the symathetic ear about the unreasonable demands of teachers instead of the mean beast of a hard driving hs'ing mom.

 

I just have this inkling that I made my life a lot harder than it would have been if I'd gone the standard route of letting someone else be responsible for schooling my kids. I hope it it worth it in the end.

 

Ok, whine over. Kids home. Yay!

 

 

[Happy]

We were a public school family before homeschooling so I hear ya. I worked part time from home. School hours are when I did the majority of my work. I can always find something to do so I'm never lonely when alone.

 

That said...

 

I loved the relationships I grew with my sons because of homeschooling. And traveling we did. My guys have been done for several years now and I'll say we could have done better academically. Wish we had done more classical for one thing. But those hours of pushing, sharing, and laughing together built some pretty good bonds between us. Wouldn't want to trade that. Someday before you are really ready for it, they will be grown and gone and you'll have all the time and space you need to do anything you want.

[SKL]

Maybe . . . or maybe you would have just had to do the schooling in the evening, like I do! (With one kid, at least.) And you'd probably feel pressure to "do something" with your days such as paid work or volunteer work. You know how it goes! ... But I'm glad you had a quiet and productive day!

[JuanitaL]

Sure, once in a while. (Then I think about how fat I would quickly become baking those cookies everyday. The first batch would probably be gone long before they actually came home, so that would be 2 batches I would have to make. Eventually, they would come home and find me in a diabetic coma on the kitchen floor. And, I seriously do not enjoy cleaning my house. I like a clean house, it's the getting there that just doesn't do anything for me. I have told my husband that my fear is when all our boys are gone I will become a 300 lb blogger.) I do enjoy the occasional day when I have the house to myself.

[Catwoman]

I think most of us have those thoughts occasionally, Stephanie! :)

[KrissiK]

I feel that way occasionally. But, I think it feels so good because it's a treat. It's like, one of the first warm days in spring. Oh, it's so wonderful and enjoyable. But, honestly, if you had that kind of weather every single day, it wouldn't seem so extraordinary. It might get downright boring after a while. Because sometimes you want to sit by a warm fire and enjoy winter. And it's not quite warm enough to go swimming or do summer things. But, I do understand the feeling and have it at times.

[Hilltop]

I feel that way sometimes too.

[KRG]

Yesterday my mom had the little one and dh took my oldest to a paleontology lecture. I was home by myself and it was so nice. Those days are few and far between. I tried to do something fun but I ended up cleaning and then I watched tv for a little bit and then it was time for everyone to be home.

[Mama Geek]

Hmmm...if my dd were to go to school it would be back to full time engineering work for me, not enough time for dd, dh, me or any of the other things that come with both people working full time.

[Catwoman]

I think that would get old fast. There is only so much cleaning to do. I mean I could probably find hobbies, but blah...I'd go out and get a job because being home all day by myself would be boring. And then I'd be stressed out because I'd be working, cleaning, dealing with the kids homework, etc. etc. It would be even more work than what I'm doing now.

 

Not saying I don't hear ya.

 

Well, I'm not much for the whole "cleaning" thing :ack2: but I have always thought that if my ds went to school, it would be a lot more stressful than having him at home. I hear a lot of stories about moms having trouble getting their kids up and out to the bus in the morning, worrying about what they'll have for lunch, making sure they're home before the kids get home from school every day, and then arguing with the kids about doing hours and hours of homework and studying every night. And then there are the after-school activities to keep track of....... :willy_nilly:

 

The worst thing for me, though, would be the regimentation of the schedule. I'm one of those free-spirited gals, you know... :p

[Ghee]

We came to homeschooling after many years of PS. Frankly, HSing is a nice relief for me LOL I have kids with slow processing speeds, sensory disorders, language delays, adhd.......stuff that regular classrooms usually "accomodate" by saying "Hey it's fine. If you don't finish it in class, just take it home." So...I worked 8-3 and then did homework PLUS unfinished classwork all evening. Then you got into areas where the teacher assigned something vague and you spent time puzzling out WHAT they wanted, calling other parents to see if you got it right, etc.. I much prefer being the one in charge ;)

 

Still, I dearly miss my paycheck (teensie weensie though it was), and the time I had for ADULT interaction.

[Crimson Wife]

I don't know any moms of only school-aged kids who are SAHM's except for those who HS.

[Catwoman]

I don't know any moms of only school-aged kids who are SAHM's except for those who HS.

 

 

I know lots of stay-at-home women. Some have kids; others don't.

[Joker]

I was home for a year while both dds were in ps, and I only had a day or two a week that I actually was able to spend the day at home cleaning. The school needs so many volunteers for various things that I was there almost daily. Both dds will be back in ps this fall after five years at home, and I've already received phone calls about future volunteering. I think I will almost be just as busy then as I am now. Right now I'm kind of looking forward to it, but I know it will get old quick and I will wish they were back home.

[justamouse]

Yep, I feel the same way.

[Word Nerd]

Most PS moms I know, myself included, work outside the home at least part time. I feel jealous of homeschooling moms at times (I used to be one before I had to go back to work).

[kathy_overman]

Oh, your day sounds so dreamy to me. I have not had a day like that in too long. My kids were in PS for 3 years, and I would like to fantasize that every day was a joy. It was not!!

I used to complain that all I did was volunteer for kids and teachers that did not appreciate my time and money, clean house, cook, do laundry, and coordinate appointments for myself and the kids.

It was unfulfilling and monotonous, so then I went to Target and spent too much money on junk we did not need (now I spend too much money on books). I used to feel guilty when I did not want to clean and put away another bucket of laundry. Now I never feel guilty for the things left undone, as I have spent my days schooling the kids.

I find learning with the kids so fulfilling, and I love learning all over again. I am writing all this so I can contain my jealously that you had a day alone and I did not!!

I am slowly learning to enjoy appreciate this time of sacrifice, as everyone on this board says, the moments are long but the years short.

[misty.warden]

I've planned to HS since before DS was born, and sometimes I still think about changing to PS even though I have curriculum planned (and in some cases, bought) already told everyone my plans, etc just because a break five days a week sounds heavenly after having been a single parent since birth. Totally know where you're coming from, OP. And then I remember even if he's in PS I might have to afterschool, deal with extra activities with way less time since most of the day he's at PS, dealing with buses, and all the other issues that made me want to HS to begin with :willy_nilly: .

[Oakblossoms]

OT: but, I always forget what JAWM means and automatically plug words in for it. My first thought was Just a Whiny Moment :p.

 

We tried school for a second time when I was in Uni. My house was so tidy and there was so much less work to do. It had it's perks.

[Kari C in SC]

We came to homeschooling after many years of PS. Frankly, HSing is a nice relief for me LOL I have kids with slow processing speeds, sensory disorders, language delays, adhd.......stuff that regular classrooms usually "accomodate" by saying "Hey it's fine. If you don't finish it in class, just take it home." So...I worked 8-3 and then did homework PLUS unfinished classwork all evening. Then you got into areas where the teacher assigned something vague and you spent time puzzling out WHAT they wanted, calling other parents to see if you got it right, etc.. I much prefer being the one in charge ;)

 

Still, I dearly miss my paycheck (teensie weensie though it was), and the time I had for ADULT interaction.

 

 

This is what I remember about my oldest being in public school. Endless homework that I was so lost in figuring out. He would always tell me that I was telling him to do it wrong. I remember when I was thinking about homeschooling, I asked my veteran homeschooling sister-in-law if I could doit and still work part time. She asked me how long I was spending on homework each night and I told he usually 2 hours, sometimes 3. She replied that was how long her whole school day was! Eye opening for me. At least I am the creator of the lesson plans and I have the teacher manuals.

[tex-bex]

My kids were in PS until this year, and I didn't get all that much done. Also, my kids were grumpy when I picked them up, and started bickering the moment they saw each other. Then, we had to rush through a snack and homework before we were off to whatever afterschool activity was planned that day. And they messed up my clean house as much then as they do now. :p

 

It's much better to HS, in my opinion, but yes, I would like to have the odd day off with NO kids at home to get some stuff accomplished. Just every so often! :)

[Danestress]

I really miss our homeschooling days. Don't wish it away.

 

But I will admit that every single time I walk by my seldom used (now) dining room, it gives me pleasure. For years if was always covered in books, papers, and mess. It took massive effort to ready it for a holiday meal. Now it is in a state of readiness. I do love it:)

 

But still, enjoy the chaos, mess, and business. They grow up fast.

[Sisyphus]

It's my fantasy to imagine all the stuff I'd do in the hours the kids would be gone! The scrap booking, the hikes, the clean organized house, the fresh meals...sigh. Please don't disrupt my happy fantasy with facts.

 

...like, both my kids have special needs (which seems so stinking unfair sometimes!) and would flounder, they DID flounder. After school activities, including those that give my son the boost to his self esteem because he's finally good at something, couldn't happen. And I'd have to get a job, because it wouldn't make sense at al, for me to be home if not homeschooling, we could really use a second income.

 

I still fantasize, though.

[Alte Veste Academy]

Well, this is a JAWM where I can totally get on board today. There is something in the water...or the air... I am totally game for the grass being greener today! :lol:

 

I just agree with you! And I would have nooooo problem filling up days and days and days with hours and hours and hours on end to myself. Nope. No sir.

 

And amen to this! As my late Grandpa used to say, "If you're bored, you're boring!" :D

 

I would still be a SAHM too, just new and improved. I would clean and do yoga and shop for groceries in a leisurely manner and go back to cooking as a hobby...maybe even write and sell secular HS curricula (uninterrupted!)... :tongue_smilie:

 

No bickering with me and pointing out the fallacy in my fantasy, por favor! This is a JAWM thread and today, I totally JAWY!

[aggie96]

I expected some of that wonderful down time/free time/me-time/etc with my 2nd grader in PS this year. But the reality has been very, very different. Outside of the hour I spend on our business and hour I spend homeschooling my Kinder, time seems to disappear. There still is not enough time. And now, I get to cram in all kinds of stuff from 3pm to 5:30pm for the family. Add to that the disappointment that it feels like we NEVER see DD since she is gone all day. Plus getting up sooooo early...grrrrrr. And we no longer have our own schedule. More than once we have wanted to go do something off the beaten path, and oopps...can't, got school...grrrrrr. Plus PS has been so much more expensive than my homeschool.

 

A friend is homeschooling her normally PS son this year to hold him back for maturity. I asked last week how it was going, and she gushed about how wonderful her schedule, etc has been this year. She LOVES it! She is dreading going back to the PS routine next year. :)

 

All that to say, that the grass is soooo not greener. We will be homeschooling next year and leaving PS far, far behind!!!!!!!!!!

[AMJ]

 

Well, I'm not much for the whole "cleaning" thing :ack2: but I have always thought that if my ds went to school, it would be a lot more stressful than having him at home. I hear a lot of stories about moms having trouble getting their kids up and out to the bus in the morning, worrying about what they'll have for lunch, making sure they're home before the kids get home from school every day, and then arguing with the kids about doing hours and hours of homework and studying every night. And then there are the after-school activities to keep track of....... :willy_nilly:

 

The worst thing for me, though, would be the regimentation of the schedule. I'm one of those free-spirited gals, you know... :p

 

 

Don't forget all of those parent-teacher conferences, especially when the teacher just doesn't get you, or your child. In public school we had a horrid teacher. In private school (first one) we had a bad administration. In the current private school we have WONDERFUL teachers, but the administration is going down the tubes fast. Even with really good teachers I end up reteaching in the evenings many days. And the school requires 30 service hours per family -- Hah! I lost count after 150 this year (probably have about 240) -- one of the teachers "joked" in front of the principal that I should be put on the payroll. My house is a pit, and will likely get MORE attention once I start homeschooling.

[AMJ]

Okay, so what does "JAWM" mean? I'm not up on all of the text speak.

[AMJ]

Manah, I just LOVE your school name -- Hominid House! Wish I had thought of that one! When Louis Leakey died I was the only kid I knew who was sorry -- the rest didn't even know who he was (uneducated rabble....).

[PachiSusan]

Okay, so what does "JAWM" mean? I'm not up on all of the text speak.

 

I asked the same question a few days ago. It means "Just Agree With Me"...it means it's a vent. She's not asking for advice.

[Dmmetler]

Me too-not because I really want her in school,but because it would be SO nice to have a day off!!

[Lucy the Valiant]

I hear ya!

[StephanieZ]

Thanks so much for all the AWM (Agreeing With Me, lol)!!

 

I really would never trade hs'ing for anything. And, yes, my kids trash my house in 10 minutes, so even if they were in school, it'd still be trashed at least daily. :) I probably wouldn't have stayed a SAHM if the kids had always gone to school, but right now, yes, I'd remain a SAHM even if they went to school (but they WON'T!!).

 

And yes, hs'ing is right for us on every level. Family time. Child-adjusted curriculum/levels. Appropriate challenge. Socialization. Values. Me-getting-lots-of-kid-time. Ability to pursue music seriously. Not having to deal with crazy schools and teachers. Yes, lots of fun times. Month long fall vacations at the beach. Yes, yes, yes, it is right for us on all these levels.

 

I just had a JAWM (Just A Whiny Moment, lol!) and I really appreciate all you great moms JAWM, reminding me that I am not alone in my moments of jealousy of the (probably false) image I had of leisurely cooking, cleaning, shopping, chatting on the phone, etc . . . Not to mention the clean house on occasion. :)

 

Thanks again for all the kind reassurance!! :)

[mandymom]

I was a PS school mom for 9 years, and I never knew what I was missing! I love being a homeschool mom and totally relish the perks of not having to manage all of my kids in school.

[LucyStoner]

I totally get you. That said, having been a ps mom with an unhappy student, I think the grass can be greener and all that. As a hs mom, I don't have to rush around in the evenings trying to squish in homework and strange assigned projects, last minute shopping trips for class parties and digging through the backpack looking for crumpled papers and permission slips. I don't have to drive a kid to and from school who is tired and cranky from a school day that starts too soon for his sleep cycle and exhausts him to the point of crankiness. Yeah, there are low points of hs but for us, ps was so much more daily stress and mess.