I have to go in for my dd's IEP meeting today. Updated.

[8circles]

I'm livid (& anxious) for you just reading about it. I'm sorry you've got such a large load of crap to deal with. I wish people actually gave a crap and wanted to help instead of being asses to feed their egos. What jerks. I can't even call them morons because they aren't just ignorant, they're downright mean.

[SKL]

I have a feeling it would be worse if you sent your daughter to school.

 

There's a blog I follow of a mom with a couple of daughters with Down Syndrome. Her eldest was in public school (the youngest in preschool). She was treated so badly in the IEP meetings, and her child's education plan so badly handled, she pulled her dd and homeschooled for a year. She now does presentations with all kinds of advice for folks going into IEP meetings. There is also a lot of info online. The advice to take an advocate every time is often stressed. And, know your rights and act like you know them.

 

I have a similar meeting coming up for my 6yo, so I'm bracing myself. I don't think anyone will be that negative. But one of the parties pretty much never says anything positive about my kid. I've heard like 200 criticisms and 0 praise. It's hard to go in with an open mind when you're up against that. (My meeting isn't a formal IEP, so I'm not taking anyone with.)

[dirty ethel rackham]

I am so sorry this went to badly. So many people acting inappropriately and overstepping their bounds. I do hope you bring and advocate to future meetings, perferrably a pit-bull who will force them to stay on task! When ds was in ST (for perceived expressive language delays which were really due to his auditory processing issues) I had a room full of people in the meeting. When a teacher asked me how his "expository writing", I paused wracking my brain trying to recall what that was exactly. The vice-principal chimed in "How much expository writing are they doing in first grade these days?" That shut her up. I asked what was the point of this meeting as I was under the impression that we were there for ST. The Vice Principal looked over the list of attendees and asked several people to leave. I was very thankful for her presence. Although my son's IEP meetings were not a big deal after that, I was glad when we were done with them because they refused to address his bigger problems - auditory and sensory issues. They replied that they didn't need to since his issues were not an issue in his learning environment (home.) If I had known to bring an advocate, I would have been able to fight this saying that his learning issue impacted his ability to take advantage of normal learning environments like classes and field trips. I ended up getting private therapy for his underlying issues, which was probably better than anything the school would have provided.

[Catwoman]

I am so sorry this went to badly. So many people acting inappropriately and overstepping their bounds. I do hope you bring and advocate to future meetings, perferrably a pit-bull who will force them to stay on task!

 

 

:iagree:

 

After hearing the way she was treated, perhaps Mergath should consider bringing a real pit bull with her. A snarly one.

[Rosie_0801]

Tell them you thought their school had an anti-bullying code and quote it to them. :sneaky2:

[Mergath]

:iagree:

 

After hearing the way she was treated, perhaps Mergath should consider bringing a real pit bull with her. A snarly one.

 

Lmao... "Oh, this? This is my certified therapy dog."

[Alessandra]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

a few thoughts:

 

WrightsLaw -- From Emotion to Advocacy has a lot of excellent tips, including difficult situations and good scripted responses.

 

You can bring someone (friend, neighbor) with you. It is good to have another person to take notes.

 

Have you written your parent comments yet? Send them electronically so they can easily be included in the body of the IEP, not at the end.

 

You can still write a memo/email to summarize the meeting and send it to all. That counts as legally should you ever need to refer to it. Clothe the communication in an envelope of 'thank you for the meeting.'

 

You didn't mention that they went over reports on how dd did this year. (Formal evals, if done this year, would be part of an eligibility meeting, not an IEP review.) The ST should have a report -- critical part of IEP. You didn't mention any goals and objectives for next year -- that is the heart of the IEP. I'm not sure if I missed this, or if you just didn't comment on it, but those parts have to be there.

 

Hey, at least you get services! Not all states require that services be available to homeschooled dc.

[MooCow]

And if it's legitimate criticism, I have no problem taking it and working with dd on it. But saying that if a kid asks for a toy she's playing with, she won't give it to them? Well, duh. If I were to ask the aid for the pen she was writing her notes with, I doubt she's going to hand it over. Because she's using it. It didn't even make sense.

 

 

next time ask for their pens, one by one :laugh:

[Catwoman]

Lmao... "Oh, this? This is my certified therapy dog."

 

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

 

 

 

"Can Fang have your handbag to play with while we're here? He loves to play with handbags... No? He can't have it? Are you saying you don't want to share?" :scared:

[Mergath]

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

a few thoughts:

 

WrightsLaw -- From Emotion to Advocacy has a lot of excellent tips, including difficult situations and good scripted responses.

 

You can bring someone (friend, neighbor) with you. It is good to have another person to take notes.

 

Have you written your parent comments yet? Send them electronically so they can easily be included in the body of the IEP, not at the end.

 

You can still write a memo/email to summarize the meeting and send it to all. That counts as legally should you ever need to refer to it. Clothe the communication in an envelope of 'thank you for the meeting.'

 

You didn't mention that they went over reports on how dd did this year. (Formal evals, if done this year, would be part of an eligibility meeting, not an IEP review.) The ST should have a report -- critical part of IEP. You didn't mention any goals and objectives for next year -- that is the heart of the IEP. I'm not sure if I missed this, or if you just didn't comment on it, but those parts have to be there.

 

Hey, at least you get services! Not all states require that services be available to homeschooled dc.

 

I didn't realize I could even make "parent comments." They always just include a quick summary of anything I say in their own words.

 

The ST did give a quick summary of which sounds dd has worked on near the beginning of the meeting, but they didn't really mention any goals, other than continuing to do ST twice a week and making dd give up toys whenever someone else wants them. :001_rolleyes: The whole thing is pointless nonsense I have to go through to keep getting ST for dd.

[Mergath]

 

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

"Can Fang have your handbag to play with while we're here? He loves to play with handbags... No? He can't have it? Are you saying you don't want to share?" :scared:

 

Bwhahahahahaaa!!! :smilielol5:

[happyhomemaker25]

 

I think I'm going to. What makes it so hard is that at every one of these meetings I've got five or six people ganging up on me. I already have anxiety issues, and situations like this are extremely difficult. Having a little backup would make a big difference.

 

 

Ugh, I'm having anxiety issues just reading this so I can only imagine what it's like.

[catz]

 

I think I'm going to. What makes it so hard is that at every one of these meetings I've got five or six people ganging up on me. I already have anxiety issues, and situations like this are extremely difficult. Having a little backup would make a big difference.

 

 

Do you have resources or leads to find someone? I might have a lead for you locally, if not. She usually advocates for gifted, but she's the master of the IEP and sits in on these types of meetings regularly. If she couldn't help you, she may have leads.

 

And I'm so sorry, that sounds absolutely horrible. What a *itch.

[VinNY]

http://www.ncld.org/learning-disability-resources/ebooks-guides-toolkits/idea-parent-guide

 

This parent guide is in layman's language. I recommend that you become more savvy about the whole IEP process and your rights. I have been going to CSE meetings for over 6 years now. I now help run a special needs PTA in our district. At first I thought they treated me like sh*t because I homeschooled, then I met many families public, private and charter schooled who received similar treatment. Don't take it personal and don't let it happen again. I practically run my meetings now. You should have all your paperwork (evaluations, draft goals etc) prior to meeting. You should never go to meeting w/o having read those reports first. You should have a say in the goals,too. The meeting should not have ended w/o those goals being discussed at meeting. Take time now to prepare for next year. Come in with your own written agenda to pass out so that the meeting follows what you would like to discuss. Do not go alone. Bring a tape recorder and ask to tape the meeting.

[jelbe5]

I am so sorry you had to go through this.

 

Check out resources here:

 

http://www.wrightslaw.com/

 

See if some of these materials are in your library. It has been years since I have delt with special Ed programs as a social worker but I believe you have a right to know who is going to be in the meeting in advance.

 

Bring an advocate with you next. It really is terrible how they treated you. There is absolutely no need for that - the point of the meeting is to assess strengths and weaknesses and design a plan to help your dd within the framework you, the parent, agree to.

[Mergath]

 

Do you have resources or leads to find someone? I might have a lead for you locally, if not. She usually advocates for gifted, but she's the master of the IEP and sits in on these types of meetings regularly. If she couldn't help you, she may have leads.

 

And I'm so sorry, that sounds absolutely horrible. What a *itch.

 

Thanks for the offer! The thing is, we're getting all the services we need, which is really just the ST. The biggest problem is that the school uses these meetings as a way to sit and bash me for an hour because they're so anti-hsing. I really just need someone with a killer icy glare to sit next to me, and as soon as they start in on the Mergath-hating, give the glare and a very cold *ahem.* Know what I mean? I'm normally not such a doormat, but something about sitting in a group of people all judging my parenting and my choices and putting my dd and me under a microscope brings out the wimp in me.

[catz]

Thanks for the offer! The thing is, we're getting all the services we need, which is really just the ST. The biggest problem is that the school uses these meetings as a way to sit and bash me for an hour because they're so anti-hsing. I really just need someone with a killer icy glare to sit next to me, and as soon as they start in on the Mergath-hating, give the glare and a very cold *ahem.* Know what I mean? I'm normally not such a doormat, but something about sitting in a group of people all judging my parenting and my choices and putting my dd and me under a microscope brings out the wimp in me.

 

This woman does EXACTLY this. She is bad to the bone. I would not want to be across the table from her. She is killer at taking people down a notch and knows the letter of the law. Both her kids are 2E and she does this kind of thing on a regular basis for this exact reason. She lives in the far, far reaching NW suburbs (maybe even a little too far to be called burbs).

 

I have a friend that used her at an advocate. I get the feeling that this sort of thing is super common at IEP meetings even if your kid is a PS kid. Same mom that used her got a scathing note from a teacher last week about how if "school were important to the parents, it would be important to their son". Kid is supposed to have an IEP with writing accommodations and teacher is not truly following the IEP and making underhanded jabs at the parents? Klassy!.

 

Anyway, I could put you in touch via FB to msg if you wanted, but if not, no worries! And I'm very sorry you can not indulge in adult beverages tonight.

[Amy in NH]

They send me a list of the people that "have" to be at the meeting before each one. I don't know why in the world the admin lady is supposedly required to be there. She has nothing to do with the ST, never interacts with dd in any way, and basically just exists to make me miserable. She's like their anti-hsing pitbull. With the aid, if she's been observing dd it at least is logical that she go, but why the admin woman has to show up and sneer at me for an hour, I have no idea.

 

They are required by law to have an administrator with the power to authorize services attend the meeting.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Get one of these advocacy people, or just go ahead and let DH off his leash. Don't let them do this one more time, my friend. What if you and dd start believing their pathological opinions? Isn't that one thing bullying does to people, to change their own perceptions of themselves? They need to be made to quit sharing their stupid thoughts because neither of you need their negativity.

[*Lulu*]

Let me remind you that they do NOT have you "over a barrel" about the services they are providing to your daughter. All thier bluster and barking is an act, pure and simple bullying.

 

Legally you could tell them to shut the hell up and to quit being prized wenches and they would still be providing services*. You already have the IEP; they are in federally mandated waters and will endanger thier funding if they screw with the regulations. It sounds like they are not used to the parents understanding this very well. They are not doing you a favor; they are doing thier jobs. They are not helping you out; they are fulfilling their obligation under the law.

 

Be bold, momma. Be fearless. And do whatever you need to to make the next meeting one in which you feel protected and empowered.

 

 

 

*As someone who was following in the footsteps of a long line of educators I have heard some hair raising stories about parents whose childen are in the PS system receiving services. I can almost guarantee you would have to really try hard to be the most rude parent they've ever encountered.

[AmyontheFarm]

I go in as an advocate for my friends when they have to sit in an IEP and are nervous that the staff will bash them or not listen to them. I review all reports with the parents, listen to their concerns and help them write out their concerns ahead of time, then if they are comfortable I encourage them to forward their questions to the Chair of the meeting ahead of time. Usually, the Chair is very pleased and makes sure that there is an answer to every single question they have. Sometimes, the Chair will even email the answers ahead of time back to the parents so that parents can process those answers can come with more questions.

 

One of the most important things I learned with my own son's IEP meetings is that I require every single person who works with my son, or who observes my son to tell me one positive thing they noticed about him. At the first meeting we had, the bashing started and I stopped the meeting and asked them to tell me one positive thing about my child. They couldn't give me answer, quickly. So, I stood up and told them that their homework wasn't done. They needed to stop seeing my child as a problem and see him as a person. I then informed them that they could reschedule this meeting for one week from today and I would expect them to state one good thing they observed about my kid at that meeting. I then turned and started to walk out.

 

The Spec Ed Director stood up and started clapping, he came around the table offered me his hand to shake and told me that he was confident my child would go places, because he was glad to see a parent who would finally stand up for their child. I thanked him, told him I expect to hear when the rescheduled meeting would take place and left.

 

I drove around the corner from the school and BAWLED my eyes out! I couldn't believe that I did that, but if felt so good. When I went back a week later, every single person in that room had many wonderful things to say about my child. I in turn told each one of them how I could see that my son was benefiting being in their care. I then started asking my questions, looking for specifics on how certain goals would be accomplished and when. I listened carefully and had a friend taking notes for me. It was a wonderful meeting.

 

Now, when I go in with parents, I tell them to inform the school ahead of time that I am coming as a note taker but I will also ask questions, only if I'm pretty sure the parents are overwhelmed and don't understand something. We are always received warmly and respectfully. I think the Principals know who I am before I enter the room, now that I'm homeschooling, my own kids, I think it scares them that I'll convince the families to also home school!

[Alessandra]

I didn't realize I could even make "parent comments." They always just include a quick summary of anything I say in their own words.

 

The ST did give a quick summary of which sounds dd has worked on near the beginning of the meeting, but they didn't really mention any goals, other than continuing to do ST twice a week and making dd give up toys whenever someone else wants them. :001_rolleyes: The whole thing is pointless nonsense I have to go through to keep getting ST for dd.

 

Most/all districts use some kind of computerized IEP writing programs. At the beginning (after the cover page) there should be a place for teacher comments -- that is where ST's comments go. Usually right after the teacher comments and before the goals/objectives section is a place for parent comments/concerns. That is a place for you to put in 1) general comments about your dc that you would want teachers/therapists to know, and 2) comments you have about what is in the IEP, as in teacher comments, appropriate goals, etc. Your comments are an integral part of the IEP, which is a legal document.

 

I am so sorry you had to go through this.

 

Check out resources here:

 

http://www.wrightslaw.com/

 

See if some of these materials are in your library. It has been years since I have delt with special Ed programs as a social worker but I believe you have a right to know who is going to be in the meeting in advance.

 

Bring an advocate with you next. It really is terrible how they treated you. There is absolutely no need for that - the point of the meeting is to assess strengths and weaknesses and design a plan to help your dd within the framework you, the parent, agree to.

 

WrightsLaw is a wonderful resource! It has a lot of advice about what to do when you are not getting what you want -- many of the examples show angry parent letters and them reframe them in a more polite, but well documented, format that gets results. Your situation is ST only I gather. But for many parents who need more services, it is good to remember that letters could be part of a mediation or due process filing with state's education department. Your case doesn't sound that adversarial, as you are getting services, but for others, letters and emails may be gone over by attorneys -- something to keep in mind for worst-case scenarios. Sorry, I'm digressing....

 

Thanks for the offer! The thing is, we're getting all the services we need, which is really just the ST. The biggest problem is that the school uses these meetings as a way to sit and bash me for an hour because they're so anti-hsing. I really just need someone with a killer icy glare to sit next to me, and as soon as they start in on the Mergath-hating, give the glare and a very cold *ahem.* Know what I mean? I'm normally not such a doormat, but something about sitting in a group of people all judging my parenting and my choices and putting my dd and me under a microscope brings out the wimp in me.

 

I usually bring a professional advocate. Despite being intelligent and articulate :hurray: , I can become a total disaster at meetings about my kids -- inarticulate, forgetting points I wanted to make, losing papers, quite idiotic in fact :scared: . For meetings when I am not asking for anything new or when I know and respect the people involved, I go alone. Otherwise, I rely on an advocate. If the situation were adversarial, I would bring an attorney.

 

You mentioned having a lot of people at your meeting (can't find that post). By law, there are certain people who have to be there, although sometimes one person can fulfill two roles. You can waive having some reps, but I wouldn't do that. Everyone at the meeting should sign a sheet, and a copy of that sheet must be attached to the final copy of the IEP.

 

Oh, one last thing -- when you get the IEP, always double check the cover page to see that dates of service, hours, etc are correct. I have seen a lot of mistakes in these -- usually it's the computer doing something, and no one checking it. If you have corrections, do them by email for the record, not just by phone.

[Hen]

Tell them you thought their school had an anti-bullying code and quote it to them. :sneaky2:

 

Rosie, that is brilliant! I think you should, at some point.

[thebacabunch]

WOW! What a tool of a lady!!!!! I feel so blessed now! Our IEP's are at an independant study charter and so we are already on the same page as far as homeschool goes. I would be livid! Besides, I am not one who believes all kids should go to preschool. It isn't compulsory, yet.

[Tokyomarie]

Another vote for a) getting very familiar with the Wrightslaw website and reading the book, From Emotions to Advocacy and b ) taking an advocate with you to the next IEP meeting. These were key for us last year when we went through the determination of eligibility process for my son when he entered a public charter high school. He was ultimately found eligible for a 504 plan with all the accommodations we hoped to get but it took being very well prepared to get to that point.

[Mergath]

 

This woman does EXACTLY this. She is bad to the bone. I would not want to be across the table from her. She is killer at taking people down a notch and knows the letter of the law. Both her kids are 2E and she does this kind of thing on a regular basis for this exact reason. She lives in the far, far reaching NW suburbs (maybe even a little too far to be called burbs).

 

I have a friend that used her at an advocate. I get the feeling that this sort of thing is super common at IEP meetings even if your kid is a PS kid. Same mom that used her got a scathing note from a teacher last week about how if "school were important to the parents, it would be important to their son". Kid is supposed to have an IEP with writing accommodations and teacher is not truly following the IEP and making underhanded jabs at the parents? Klassy!.

 

Anyway, I could put you in touch via FB to msg if you wanted, but if not, no worries! And I'm very sorry you can not indulge in adult beverages tonight.

 

Well, after today I'm going to work with dd ten times a day practicing those sounds, lol. "Ink, honey! Say ink! For the love of god, just say ink!!!" :p And with any luck, we'll never have to go to another IEP meeting again. I've been thinking about it all day though, and I think I've officially reached the point where I'm going to get dd private therapy if at all possible. Between the crazies mentioned today, and the parent educator who regularly follows me in the hallway to tell me that homeschooling is a mistake and I'm going to screw dd up forever, it's too much. I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack every time I have to bring dd to the school. I'm tired of fending these people off and having to explain myself over and over and over...

[jhschool]

I am sorry you are dealing with such pigs. They are out to get you, for

no reason that I can understand. What is their problem? I just don't get

it. They are picking on you for nothing. It's crazy.

Hugs.

----

Is there any way you could get private speech therapy?

 

When DS was 8 he needed speech therapy.

 

The private speech therapist I hired

told me that I could get her for free, 30 minutes a week, shared with 4 other kids,

if I got her through the public school.

 

I decided to hire her privately. It was a wonderful and positive experience from

beginning to end.

 

ETA: I just read that you will look at private therapy. Great! I did practice every day

with DS when he was 8 with the homework. We bought a counter from amazon:

 

Sportline Walking Advantage 385 Tally Counter

 

and we practiced each sound about 30 times each several times a day.We worked on all the sounds every day. The Tally counter makes it fun!

[Laura in STL]

 

 

Well, after today I'm going to work with dd ten times a day practicing those sounds, lol. "Ink, honey! Say ink! For the love of god, just say ink!!!" :p And with any luck, we'll never have to go to another IEP meeting again. I've been thinking about it all day though, and I think I've officially reached the point where I'm going to get dd private therapy if at all possible. Between the crazies mentioned today, and the parent educator who regularly follows me in the hallway to tell me that homeschooling is a mistake and I'm going to screw dd up forever, it's too much. I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack every time I have to bring dd to the school. I'm tired of fending these people off and having to explain myself over and over and over...

 

 

I'm sorry you had such a bad experience! You had to deal with terribly rude behavior.

 

My oldest went to preschool 2x's a week for 2.5 hours a day when he was four while I was at the gym. He would have gone to the playroom for 1.5 hours anyway, so I figured, "Why not?" I was homeschooling him the rest of the time, maybe about 10 hours a week of formal work total. Part way through the year the teacher asked me if I realized that he could read. Well, that would be pretty hard to miss! Of course, I realize my child can read. She informed me that I was going to allow him to get too far ahead, and that would make K difficult. I was only too happy to tell her not to worry, we weren't planning to put him in K anyway!

 

Homeschoolers can never make these people happy. If her speech improves too much then she will probably be in danger of becoming a social outcast due to her perfect enunciation! For whatever reason they are threatened by homeschooling, I think, and it comes out as meanness. Sorry you had to deal with it today.

[ravinlunachick]

I'm sorry your dd has such a craptastic IEP team, Mergath.

 

I've been to some doozies myself, having had 2 kids now who've received services from ps Spec Ed. When dd was in kindy, I refused a certain sort of testing for her, because I was convinced she didn't have that issue (plus, she wasn't old enough anyway for the minimum testing age for that instrument!). The principal of the school actually stood up and blocked my way out when I tried to leave the meeting!! I put up with their nonsense for about 5 more minutes, but I'd already decided that if they blocked my way again, I was going to call 911 and tell them I was being held against my will. It was so ridiculously OTT.

 

We had a battle royale with the school district last year over my ds and his IEP and placement. I stood my ground and refused to sign the IEP. They were really upset, but you know what? It was totally worth it! My dh came to the second go-round, as well as a knowledgeable district supervisor. We walked out with a plan that we could all agree upon.

 

I guess the best advice I can give you is:

 

1) Always take a drink with you. This will give you something to keep in your hands, and it will allow you to take a sip when you need a moment to think or compose yourself when things get tough.

 

2) Email after the meeting. CC everyone involved. It can be as simple as "Just confirming our discussion about XYZ. Mrs. Smith said A, and Mr. Dongle said B." Or, it could include a statement from you that you felt like they were overstepping their bounds or harrassing you when they said, "Blah," about homeschooling. IME, they can be weird sometimes about being willing to include things a parent wants in the notes. This gives you documentation about what was said. This is particularly important if any promises were made about anything but not written down.

 

3) Take your dh with you whenever you can. I was a teacher; I've done tons of IEPs from the other side of the table, and I never would have believed this would matter. I can say, though, that when you're dealing with negative attitudes, the presence of a man on your side in a female-dominated world can make a HUGE difference. It offends my feminist sensitivities to say that, but it can be a truth for certain situations. :(

[Mergath]

I'm sorry you had such a bad experience! You had to deal with terribly rude behavior.

 

My oldest went to preschool 2x's a week for 2.5 hours a day when he was four while I was at the gym. He would have gone to the playroom for 1.5 hours anyway, so I figured, "Why not?" I was homeschooling him the rest of the time, maybe about 10 hours a week of formal work total. Part way through the year the teacher asked me if I realized that he could read. Well, that would be pretty hard to miss! Of course, I realize my child can read. She informed me that I was going to allow him to get too far ahead, and that would make K difficult. I was only too happy to tell her not to worry, we weren't planning to put him in K anyway!

 

Homeschoolers can never make these people happy. If her speech improves too much then she will probably be in danger of becoming a social outcast due to her perfect enunciation! For whatever reason they are threatened by homeschooling, I think, and it comes out as meanness. Sorry you had to deal with it today.

 

 

My dd can read too, at around a third grade level, and I get crap about that. When she was behind, they told me it was because I wasn't pushing her enough and I coddled her. The school's PT stood there and actually scolded me once when dd was two, telling me how all of dd's issues were my fault, and had nothing to do with the fact that she's missing part of her sixteenth chromosome. :glare: (I guess dd's developmental pediatrician just didn't know what he was talking about, then?) Now that she's jumped ahead, they act like I must be chaining her to the kitchen table to do phonics for eight hours a day.

 

These people really are a nightmare. I didn't realize it until I sat here and typed it all out in this thread, but it's true that we're never going to make them happy.

[Mommy22alyns]

:cursing: :grouphug: Ugh, I'm so sorry, Mergath. Too bad we can't all come in as your backup.

[J-rap]

I don't have any advice, but just wanted to say sorry about your experiences -- they sound awful and very stressful. :( One of our daughters had to go through a few years of IEP meetings (for hearing loss and speech), and one of the main people running the meeting came up to me afterwards to tell me that SHE was planning to homeschool too, and she wanted some pointers! Wish you could have that experience. Sounds like the private route -- if your insurance covers it -- might be a good way to go for you. (Or if I were just a little closer, I'd go with you!)