Do you allow your daughter(s) to wear bikinis? (Poll)

[MiniBlondes]

Opening statement: I realize that this may be a sensitive topic for some and I promise that it's not my intent to offend anyone. I am coming here and seeking the input of you ladies because my daughter is beginning to question my 'no bikinis' rule and it's making me doubt myself and wonder if I am being too strict.

 

So, now I'm honestly curious to see if I'm the only one with a 'no bikinis' rule.

[somo_chickenlady]

We don't have a daughter, but if we did I would have no problem letting her wear a bikini.

[prairiewindmomma]

We are ok with tankinis, based on the cut. We prefer our daughters to wear swim shirts and shorts though.....not only for the sun coverage, but also so that modesty can be maintained while active in the water. The tankini rule is that belly must remain covered when arms are raised, and nothing is showing when bent over. ;)

[Mom2TheTeam]

Tankinis with full coverage for our family. I'm sure my daughter will question it at some point too, but that's too bad. She can wear what she wants when she moves out. LOL!!

[DragonFaerie]

My DD is 11 and is only allowed tankinis. So far, she hasn't asked for anything else. I don't see allowing bikinis until at least 15 or 16.

[Stayseeliz]

It shows too much skin. Why does everything have to be on display? We do one piece suits only. We'd do a tankini that covered the whole belly but those are hard to find.

[JudoMom]

I was never allowed to wear a bikini growing up, and if we had daughters we'd have the same rule. I wear a tankini now, though, and would allow any daughters to do the same.

[theYoungerMrsWarde]

I don't have a daughter (yet???) but I plan on insisting on one-piece swimming suits if I do.

[saraha]

Tankinis are a go, even if they showed a little belly when arms are raised. Bikinis, are a no.

[Freckles]

We allow both of our dd to wear bikinis. I grew up in OK where swimming was an option only a small portion of the year. My girls have grown up on Maui and in S. Ca. They can swim year round, and the culture is just different. The general population on Maui wears a bikini and mesh cover up to restaurants, grocery shopping, etc... I might feel differently if we lived in another location.

[FaithManor]

DD and I did not do bikinis. I can't say that I "disallowed" it because dd never wanted one so it wasn't an issue. We did to tankini's with longer tops so they stayed down. But, DD and I like to seriously swim so the biggest consideration when we choose a suit is comfort. That means trunk style bottoms because we HATE the riding up that seems to occur with one pieces, and since we are pretty careful about sunburn issues, a rash guard shirt when we go to the lake. We end up pretty modest by any standards without that even being the primary consideration.

 

My boys don't swim shirtless either. Always with a rash guard. They've said they really like this because not only do they not worry about sun burn when outdoors, but even at an indoor pool, they feel they stay warmer.

 

My current swim get-up is a pair of really comfy women's swim trunks, a very supportive bikini style top because I couldn't find a tankini top that fit me well last year, and a rash guard over that. I never swim without the rash guard.

 

I think swimming is one of the more perfect forms of exercise and I believe water safety should be taught to all so I do not personally relate to the concept of not allowing swimming at all since that means water safety is probably not being taught and certainly not swim strokes and treading water. So, I hope that people who are against swimming stay off of boats and away from bodies of water that are deep. But, part of my perspective comes from a near drowning experience in our extended family that could have been completely avoided if a little water safety had been taught to teen in question.

 

Probably not too helpful for you since we came to our decisions via more pragmatic choices.

 

Faith

[MiniBlondes]

We will allow tankinis as well. I feel it's a nice compromise. Plus, it's easier for them to use the bathroom. :)

[Parrothead]

The decision on what to wear to swim is up to dd. I wouldn't have a problem with a bikini, but she seems so. She only wants to wear a one piece.

[kewb]

My reasons for no bikinis is twofold.

1. We are a family of marshmallow white people. We burn.

2. They are really not right for my dd's body type.

 

The main reason is the burning. Tankinis are fine. Makes it easier to go to the bathroom.

[Paige]

I prefer tankinis. I like them for ease of using the restroom and for coverage with the sun, and I just think they are cuter. I find one pieces cumbersome but my older DDs prefer them so they get them (almost 9yrs). I had one suit for them where the tankini top was shorter than we'd had in the past and they were uncomfortable with it riding up. I don't think there's anything wrong with bikinis, but I don't see anything right in them either, KWIM? I just have zero reason to choose them because of sunscreen issues, comfort, and I don't like them wearing too adult styles. FWIW, I wore tiny bikinis as an adult, teen and kid and I grew up fine and moral and had no issues with boys. I don't think they are inherently bad. I just like the looks of tankinis and prefer them myself for comfort these days. I think if I find them more comfortable then my DD would as well.

[albeto]

Yep. DD (15) wears what she wants. Where I live bikinis are simply what one wears to the beach or pool on a hot day. They don't have any moral value one way or the other.

[4kidlets4me]

I allow bikini's, I don't see a problem with them. I would wear them myself but nobody wants to see that

[MooCow]

We are ok with tankinis, based on the cut. We prefer our daughters to wear swim shirts and shorts though.....not only for the sun coverage, but also so that modesty can be maintained while active in the water. ;)

 

:iagree: this.

[milovany]

I said no, definitely not, but that's just as much their answer as mine. They wear the rash guard short-sleeve shirts amd swim shorts from Lands End. They are 16, 15 and 11 years old.

[magnificent_baby]

Dd is 9 and I don't allow them. I know I am in the minority on this at our local pool. It's possible I will reconsider when she's older. I will allow a tankini if it covers well.

[NotSoObvious]

I always thought I would for sure let my daughters wear bikinis.

 

I don't. :)

 

We will do tankinis, but they haven't been interested in them lately. They also really like wearing their swim shirts, even in the indoor pools. They say they just like wearing them.

 

When they started growing quickly, around 8, the tankinis didn't seem to fit- either the tops were too short or the bottoms too baggy, so we switched to one pieces and they haven't had any interest in going back.

 

I don't see a bra and underwear type bikini in their future, but we take things as they come...

[Mrs Mungo]

A two piece or a two piece that shows their tummy or a teeny tiny bikini? These are not all the same thing.

 

IMO, it's easier to find two pieces that fit my skinny girls. Anything one piece that fits in torso length tends to sag in the crotch area, which is where they actually need coverage. Some two pieces (even those that show the tummy) can show less than some one pieces. I don't have a problem with two pieces, even if they show some tummy. I would have a problem with an itty bitty bikini, but they are not all the same. It's probably worth pointing out that I actually have teen girls and we've lived in Hawaii, where two pieces are extremely common and not considered immodest. What is "modest" is a cultural construct and not everyone agrees upon its meaning.

 

ETA: In Hawaii (where you might actually be surfing) a properly fitted rashguard would be super-tight. If it isn't super-tight, then it can get jerked off of you by a wave...with your swimsuit top. I've seen it happen. So, we wouldn't do the sort of full-coverage loose fitting rash guards I've seen some people wear. A well fitting, supportive top that fits is more flattering that a super-tight (properly) fitting rash guard, IMO.

[Chris in VA]

No bikinis here, but if we lived on Maui or whatever, I'd really not have a huge problem with it. Dd looks older than she is, and honestly, I don't want men or older teens hitting on her.

We did one pieces up til last year. Now we do tankinis.

 

I don't like that the bottoms seem so low in the front, tho--goodness, you practically have to shave, iykwim. I'm sure some do. I just don't find that super-low-cut appealing on anyone, good bod or not.

[MercyA]

99% of conventional bathing suits (one-piece and two-piece) don't meet my personal standards for modesty, so, yes, bikinis are out for us. I've purchased suits from these sites and like them very much:

 

www.becomingswimdress.com/Girls_Swimdress.html

www.dressingforhisglory.com

 

Yes, I'm one of those crazy ladies... ;)

[Karen in CO]

My daughters can both wear bikinis (not tiny ones) if they want, but they also have to wear long-sleeve rash guards at the beach and a cover-up when not at the beach. They're from Colorado and have day-glo white skin. I'm from FL, I wear a bikini top or a tankini top with a cute, short swim skirt or shorts. I grew up in bikinis back in the day before sunscreen.

[Joker]

We do rash guards and shorts here. Some of us have red hair and fair skin and skin cancer has popped up in our family a few times. I've had pre-cancerous spots cut out already. We also live in Florida and the first time we went to the beach here I burned worse than I ever had even with sunscreen and a hat. I'm not going to take chances with dds (they're 13 & 10). When they're older, they can choose otherwise.

[AK_Mom4]

I voted "Depends on Where We Are". Regular indoor pools are pretty cold here (for swim teams), so tank-style and shorts is more practical. When we have gone somewhere warmer for vacation, it was generally to a water park where shorts / t-shirts were a better idea to help with sunburn.

 

But if we went somewhere warm with a beach - yeah, no problem with bikinis. They don't look so good on me, but I can rock a tank-style and mini-skirt.

[Mrs Mungo]

99% of conventional bathing suits (one-piece and two-piece) don't meet my personal standards for modesty, so, yes, bikinis are out for us. I've purchased suits from these sites and like them very much:

 

www.becomingswimdress.com/Girls_Swimdress.html

www.dressingforhisglory.com

 

Yes, I'm one of those crazy ladies... ;)

 

 

But you would be EXTREMELY hard pressed to do water sports (surfing, sailing, etc) in something like that. In fact, I am fairly certain dd's sailing instructor would not have allowed it-too much fabric to weigh you down can be dangerous in real waves. My girls do water sports. We aren't sitting near the pool people.

 

ETA: I've seen skirts with less fabric than those in the second link be ripped off people in a wave. They might be okay for the pool, but wearing them to the beach would be risky for more reason than one, IMO.

[fairfarmhand]

It shows too much skin. Why does everything have to be on display? We do one piece suits only. We'd do a tankini that covered the whole belly but those are hard to find.

 

us too.

[kitten18]

Yes, dd can wear a bikini. Now, she hasn't worn one yet because she always wears a long sleeved rash guard for sun protection. But if we went to the pool at night or an indoor pool, then she could just wear her two piece.

[ChristusG]

Rash guards and shorts here. My girls have never asked for anything else because they just know that's swimming attire for our family. No bikinis. No tankinis. Really, the bottoms are both basically underwear.

[milovany]

www.becomingswimdress.com/Girls_Swimdress.html

www.dressingforhisglory.com

 

 

Those are nice, thanks for sharing the links.

[FriedClams]

We require a swim shirt over a tankini or one piece. This is for both mon and dd. :-)

 

ETA- We allow a tankini under her swim shirt because dd is extremely tall and thin and the one piece suits can gap immodestly (or cause wedgies). We also encourage a swim skirt or swim shorts.

 

DS wears board shorts and a swim shirt also.

[Jenn121]

My answer is no. If I would not let her walk out of the house in her bra and underwear then it make no sense to me to let her out in the same thing made of a different fabric. Non-belly baring tankinis work best for my oldest as she has a long torso and one pieces just don't fit correctly.

[Element]

Bikinis or tankinis are often less revealing on a super skinny girl than a one-piece. When a child doesn't have much width to them, the one-piece swimwear leg holes go up way above their pelvic bones... a la 90s "Baywatch"-style. :ohmy: At least that has been the case for my 49" tall 45 lb dd.

[MercyA]

But you would be EXTREMELY hard pressed to do water sports (surfing, sailing, etc) in something like that. In fact, I am fairly certain dd's sailing instructor would not have allowed it-too much fabric to weigh you down can be dangerous in real waves. My girls do water sports. We aren't sitting near the pool people.

 

 

Do you mean the girls' suit? The under layer is made of standard bathing suit material, and the over layer is mesh and very light. There's nothing to weigh you down.

 

In the ladies' suits, I purchase the swim culottes and the "swim body tees", both of which allow complete freedom of movement in the water and are not at all heavy. They are of course made of water-shedding material.

 

We don't get tangled up in them when we swim. :001_smile:

 

My daughters would not be allowed to participate in any sports in which skimpy clothing is a requirement. We'd find garments that are appropriate for the sport *and* acceptable to us, or we'd find another type of activity. I'm not looking for an argument or trying to cause offense--just sharing my perspective.

 

Peace to all. :001_smile:

[Word Nerd]

Tankinis but not bikinis here (including for me). My older DD prefers to wear a bikini top with a rash guard and board shorts.

[AngieW in Texas]

My 17yo wears a one-piece. I've been trying to talk her into a tankini for years, but haven't been successful yet.

 

My 19yo can wear whatever she wants. She's an adult. I refused to buy a bikini for her until she was 16yo. Even then she only wore it once. She just isn't an outside person.

 

My 14yo got a bikini last year specifically for the beach. She had lots of problems with the sand and the salt in her tankini, so I agreed to let her wear a bikini at the beach. She only wore it to the beach. She wore a tankini for everything else.

[jenn-]

If it was up to me, she would wear a rash guard and shorts, and she did when she was younger. Now that she has the nerve to voice her opinion on her clothing choices, I allow tankinis. My reason is solely for sun coverage though. My father has had numerous cancerous moles removed and for that alone, I wish she would cover up. I swim in a rash guard and shorts.

[Matryoshka]

I don't know. :lol: My dds (14 and 12) are rather vehemently opposed to wearing them, so I haven't had to wonder what I'd say if they wanted to. :tongue_smilie:

 

I think I would probably allow a modest two-piece as long as it had a top that was firmly placed and top and bottom had good coverage (no bits hanging out) if they were begging for a bikini, but like I said, they are firmly in the one-piece camp, so the issue just hasn't come up. Yay.

[prairiewindmomma]

I posted up above and felt I should come back and say....we prefer our boys wear rash guards and swim trunks for the same reason....sun coverage + modesty while moving in the water. I would raise an eyebrow if they wanted to wear swim thongs.

[Mrs Mungo]

Do you mean the girls' suit? The under layer is made of standard bathing suit material, and the over layer is mesh and very light. There's nothing to weigh you down.

 

In the ladies' suits, I purchase the swim culottes and the swim tee, both of which allow complete freedom of movement in the water and are not at all heavy. They are of course made of water-shedding material.

 

I was talking about the suits like this:

http://www.dressingforhisglory.com/swimwear/freestyle-swim-skirts/girl-freestyle-swim-skirt.html

 

I have personally seen outfits like this be removed from girls in even small swells. This is a video from the beach that was close to our house in Hawaii:

 

It actually tumbles people up on the sand in very tiny (by Hawaii standard) swells. It is *far* better to wear something tight fitting that is close to your body.

 

We don't get tangled up in them when we swim. :001_smile:

 

Are swells like the one in the video typical at the beaches you visit?

 

My daughters would not be allowed to participate in any sports in which skimpy clothing is a requirement. We'd find garments that are appropriate for the sport *and* acceptable to us, or we'd find another type of activity. I'm not looking for an argument or trying to cause offense--just sharing my perspective.

 

Peace to all. :001_smile:

 

Expressing an opinion different than yours is not arguing in the sense that I am trying to sway you. However, *I* would rather my dds learn to participate in healthy sports that they enjoy. It doesn't mean they have to expose a crazy amount of skin, just a typical amount of skin for the beach.

[FaithManor]

But you would be EXTREMELY hard pressed to do water sports (surfing, sailing, etc) in something like that. In fact, I am fairly certain dd's sailing instructor would not have allowed it-too much fabric to weigh you down can be dangerous in real waves. My girls do water sports. We aren't sitting near the pool people.

 

ETA: I've seen skirts with less fabric than those in the second link be ripped off people in a wave. They might be okay for the pool, but wearing them to the beach would be risky for more reason than one, IMO.

 

I agree!

 

And I'm all for water safety over modesty any day. Our rash guards are fairly form fitting for the lake. We have The Great Lakes here so these are inland seas for all intensive purposes. We can get strong currents and waves. I want our family to be able to swim well when necessary. So again, circumstances should dictate appropriateness. At the pool, a looser rash guard would be fine.

 

But, we like to seriously play in the water and not just hang on the beach so again, what is appropriate for us might be completely different for those that mostly go for the sun and fresh air and never go in over their knees.

 

Faith

[MeaganS]

At the ages of my girls right now, I don't really care. Around 6 or 7 our rule will be no two-pieces, although a full-covering tankini might be allowed depending on the suit and situation.

[FaithManor]

Do you mean the girls' suit? The under layer is made of standard bathing suit material, and the over layer is mesh and very light. There's nothing to weigh you down.

 

In the ladies' suits, I purchase the swim culottes and the "swim body tees", both of which allow complete freedom of movement in the water and are not at all heavy. They are of course made of water-shedding material.

 

We don't get tangled up in them when we swim. :001_smile:

 

My daughters would not be allowed to participate in any sports in which skimpy clothing is a requirement. We'd find garments that are appropriate for the sport *and* acceptable to us, or we'd find another type of activity. I'm not looking for an argument or trying to cause offense--just sharing my perspective.

 

Peace to all. :001_smile:

 

And that is perfectly wonderful. I don't think anyone wants to sway you from your family beliefs. Every family needs to make the best choice for them.

 

I would just say that if you where culotte type swim suits, please, please, please stay away from playing in the ocean or the Great Lakes. The drag on the material would make drowning a much higher risk. These currents are so much stronger than anything encountered at the average small lake that most states have and I've seen kids struggle to stand when knocked down by a wave when wearing too much fabric. This happened at a beach in Broward County, FL on the Atlantic ocean and if I hadn't been there to help said child up (water was only 2 ft. deep), he still would have been at risk of a terrible tragedy because his parents backs were turned to him.

 

There's nothing wrong with choosing other sports over water sports, nothing at all. Our concern is for those that don't participate might believe that this type of suit absolutely won't cause a problem in strong waves and currents.

 

That's all Mrs. Mungo and I are saying. We've witnessed it and it's pretty scary!

 

Blessings,

Faith

[Mrs Mungo]

And that is perfectly wonderful. I don't think anyone wants to sway you from your family beliefs. Every family needs to make the best choice for them.

 

I would just say that if you where culotte type swim suits, please, please, please stay away from playing in the ocean or the Great Lakes. The drag on the material would make drowning a much higher risk. These currents are so much stronger than anything encountered at the average small lake that most states have and I've seen kids struggle to stand when knocked down by a wave when wearing too much fabric. This happened at a beach in Broward County, FL on the Atlantic ocean and if I hadn't been there to help said child up (water was only 2 ft. deep), he still would have been at risk of a terrible tragedy because his parents backs were turned to him.

 

To add to that, my dh had a soldier whose fiancé drowned here in NC while he was deployed. It was very sad. There are some very strong currents at some beaches. If you aren't used to it, if you aren't aware of it, if you are not properly attired, if you don't know what to do in situations where you get caught in a current, then you increase the danger. It happens. I believe in minimizing the risks as much as possible.

 

There's nothing wrong with choosing other sports over water sports, nothing at all. Our concern is for those that don't participate might believe that this type of suit absolutely won't cause a problem in strong waves and currents.

 

Agreed.

[Elinor Everywhere]

The decision on what to wear to swim is up to dd. I wouldn't have a problem with a bikini, but she seems so. She only wants to wear a one piece.

 

Same here. My dd would look great in a bikini, and we joke that she should wear one while she can! But she has a strong modesty streak and so far doesn't want one. She also loves to dive off our diving board and that works much better with a one-piece. However, now that she is 15 and going to school, she is finally becoming aware that she is a pretty girl, so who knows what she'll think by next summer!

[catz]

I have allowed my 8 year old DD to wear 2 piece swim suits with similar cuts to this

 

http://image.hannaan..._6_3L?LiveFullW$

 

At 16 and up, I'm going to be picking my battles and clothing isn't likely to be one of them. So if she wants a full on bikini at that age and it actually fits and covers, fine by me. Up to that age, I will probably work to keep her in stuff that is no less modest than the suit above.

 

I wore bikinis/tankinis up until I had kids. Now that would be a frightening prospect. :smilielol5:

 

ETA - my son is funny because he will not swim without a rash guard now. I started on one in the summers to save on sunscreen and he's super pale. Now he feels naked without it and if I forget it at a hotel or something, he is not a happy camper.

[KrissiK]

I prefer the tankini. I actually think it's more modest than a one piece, especially if the girl has a long torso. Keeps the top from stretching down and also helps prevent the inevitable tugging on the seat.

[Shawna in Texas]

DD can wear what she wants. She retired her bikini for a monokini.