CC: Would love to hear what you think about this issue for our youth at church.

[3lilreds in NC]

Our church was able to purchase an old car dealership building, and they're making into a middle/high school youth facility. (We purchased it with a Christian school that will also use it for classrooms - I think for their upper level students also.)

 

Two Sundays ago, we got a list of requests for things that they would like to furnish the building. On the list were several Xbox game consoles and Rock Band software.

 

I have a big problem with Rock Band at church. I understand that we are a seeker-sensitive church and that we want to attract kids who don't know anything about God. I also understand that Rock Band is a way for several kids to play at once. However, I went and looked at the track list, and some of the songs are just not OK, IMO, for a Christ-centered environment. I confess that I don't know a lot of the songs because, well, I'm old, but I know enough to have red flags go up.

 

I am particularly sensitive to this issue. Music profoundly affects my soul, and as much as I love a lot of the music on the Rock Band game, I have to stay away from it. Lyrics can be insidious; you think you're not listening, but your brain picks up more than you know.

 

So, I'm considering writing a letter to the church to let them know my concerns. I guess I'm wondering if anyone else would have an issue with this? Just curious. How would you handle it?

[newbie]

Since it is church related, it would have to be Christian groups and x box games would have strict ratings.

 

I think they will understand.

 

Jet

[percytruffle]

It is a fine line to walk, being in the world but not of the world. If you are uncomfortable with it then you should voice your opinion. Chances are you are not the only one.

 

There certainly has been a trend within the last ten years or so to become so "seeker friendly" that even the gospel becomes compromised. The line has to be drawn somewhere.

 

I think I would be uncomfortable with this issue too.

[newbie]

It is a fine line to walk, being in the world but not of the world. If you are uncomfortable with it then you should voice your opinion. Chances are you are not the only one.

 

There certainly has been a trend within the last ten years or so to become so "seeker friendly" that even the gospel becomes compromised. The line has to be drawn somewhere.

 

I think I would be uncomfortable with this issue too.

 

What is seeker friendly?

 

Jet

[3lilreds in NC]

Seeker-friendly means that we try to create an environment in which people who have been away from church for a long time, or who have never been to church, will feel comfortable if they visit on Sunday morning.

 

In our church, we have a worship band that plays contemporary music loudly. The volume is so that everyone will feel comfortable singing rather than worrying about whether others can hear them. There are no hymnals; the words are up on big screens. The messages are true to the Gospel, but they are topical, and relevant to everyday life - how to deal with difficult people at work, in your family, things like that. Not so much digging into scripture. We have a coffee bar and a cafeteria so that you could bring someone to church for coffee or breakfast or lunch and talk with them.

 

Generally seeker-friendly or seeker-sensitive means that the church environment is geared toward people who are seeking to know more about God, rather than those of us who already know Him.

[phathui5]

I've been to a lot of churches before we finally picked one we were going to attend. And a lot before that because we moved around a lot.

 

One thing I've learned about trying to be "seeker friendly" and "culturally relevant" is that you get to a point that you're so much like the local coffee shop or arcade that there's no reason to go to your church anymore. If the church is just like other places like a sermon thrown in there, why even bother going?

 

Having recently been a teenager myself, I think teens respond well to being challenged to grow, to be closetr to God, to get out there and do something for Christ. In fact, they may be the group most open to changing and growing in that direction. What they lack in wisdom, they make up for in enthusiam.

 

If I were in your situation, explaining it to the youth, I wouldn't take the approach that this stuff isn't appropriate for them. Really, they can handle it. I would take the approach that you want to stick with music that honors God, and this stuff doesn't fit the bill.

[percytruffle]

Seeker friendly means your facility, style of worship, programs, etc are structured to be less like a traditional church and more like what a non-church goer would be comfortable attending. Instead of a church with a center aisle and pews and an alter, you would have a large room with chairs, a video screen, a worship platform, etc. It seems more like an event (banquet, meeting, concert) and less like "church". Many have cafés or coffee bars and it's common to bring your coffee etc right into the worship facility. Of course, the music is worship bands with guitars and keyboards and drums. The organ, choir, and hymnals have been eliminated. Basically, tradition has been sacrificed for the sake of appealing to the masses who are not comfortable with the traditional church scenario. This view is then carried over into youth groups, small groups, and other programs.

 

I'm not saying it is wrong or bad in and of itself. It serves a purpose. Unfortunately, it has become very trendy and a church can become so concerned with its appeal and appearance that it can loose sight of its ultimate goal of salvation.

[Laurie4b]

Sure. Voice your concerns--only do it in person. It will be much more productive.

 

It is really hard to write a letter expressing disagreement without sucuumbing to the temptation to "make a case." While that type of persuasive writing is useful in letters to the editor, etc., it typically doesn't advance community or understanding in a church environment.

 

My suggestion would be to approach whoever is in charge and say something like, "I have some concerns about the Rock band thing at youth group. Is this a good time for me to share them? Then share your concerns without "making a case." Put as much as possible into question form. Eg "I find that lyrics sink more deeply into my head than I'd like to admit. What have you thought about in terms of protecting teens who may be wired more like me?"

 

Because you are taking a question/sharing approach, you don't have to get yourself all worked up for a confrontation. You're not being confrontive. No matter how good the writer, it's easier to misunderstand written language than spoken. When you speak in person, you can immediately see the body language of the other person and he or she can see yours. The exchange is a give-and-take.

 

Asking questions and sharing concerns (rather than delivering conclusions) in person will go much farther to getting your point of view taken into consideration than writing a letter. And... that approach has the bonus of building relationship.

[newbie]

Seeker friendly means your facility, style of worship, programs, etc are structured to be less like a traditional church and more like what a non-church goer would be comfortable attending. Instead of a church with a center aisle and pews and an alter, you would have a large room with chairs, a video screen, a worship platform, etc. It seems more like an event (banquet, meeting, concert) and less like "church". Many have cafés or coffee bars and it's common to bring your coffee etc right into the worship facility. Of course, the music is worship bands with guitars and keyboards and drums. The organ, choir, and hymnals have been eliminated. Basically, tradition has been sacrificed for the sake of appealing to the masses who are not comfortable with the traditional church scenario. This view is then carried over into youth groups, small groups, and other programs.

 

I'm not saying it is wrong or bad in and of itself. It serves a purpose. Unfortunately, it has become very trendy and a church can become so concerned with its appeal and appearance that it can loose sight of its ultimate goal of salvation.

 

Thanks for the explanation,

 

Jet

[NevadaRabbit]

So, I'm considering writing a letter to the church to let them know my concerns. I guess I'm wondering if anyone else would have an issue with this? Just curious. How would you handle it?

 

I'd absolutely voice my concerns, but I think it would be better to speak directly with your Youth Pastor or whomever wrote the request list.

[Mom to Aly]

I agree, you should voice your concerns, but if you feel more comfortable doing it in a letter do it that way--some people do not feel comfortable, or are not as fluent, in person--if it makes it more personal to you, give it to the Pastor in person.

 

I am not Christian, and I am extremely liberal, but, if you would like an outsiders opinion, I think whatever gets the kids there is great. This makes me think of the movie "Sister Act", with Whoopi Goldberg--she played a nun? She totally changed the way the music was played, and all the kids in the neighborhood came pouring in. While I doubt that will happen, I think something that will allow kids to feel more comfortable, something they can really relate to if they do visit, will help, and it may not be only Christian music--although there certainly are plenty of great bands out there now! I was telling my god daughter how much I liked a band, was it Reliant K? And she told me they were a Christian band--I had no idea!

 

Anyway--yes, the music should certainly be appropriate, but, especially without even having heard the songs, I think you shouldn't get too worked up. I doubt your Pastor is going to be blasting sacriligious music at the teens who do show up ;).

[Karenciavo]

Sure. Voice your concerns--only do it in person. It will be much more productive.

 

Asking questions and sharing concerns (rather than delivering conclusions) in person will go much farther to getting your point of view taken into consideration than writing a letter. And... that approach has the bonus of building relationship.

 

I'd absolutely voice my concerns, but I think it would be better to speak directly with your Youth Pastor or whomever wrote the request list.

 

I agree.

[Kathleen in VA]

Yes, you should say something, either way you feel comfortable. As was mentioned before, there are sure to be others who feel the same way you do and haven't got the courage or words to express themselves.

 

I understand the mentality of the seeker-sensitive church (although I do not agree with it), but I think many folks who come to church after a long absence or for the first time are looking for something different than what they are finding in the world - it seems counter-productive to offer them the world's music in a worldly atmosphere. Just my 2¢.

 

A great video that discusses the idea of rock music in worship is called Pop Goes the Music.

[Kelli in TN]

We probably attend similar churches!!

 

We bought a bunch of Gamecubes for our children's ministry. Two of the games that ended up nixed were Super Smash Brothers Melee and some music game that went with the Bongos. I don't know who sent the Super Smash Brothers Melee packing, but I know it was over a voiced concern about the Pokemon characters. I am the one who voiced concern over the music game because of some of the songs on it.

 

I think you should voice your concern either in person or through a letter. I was very comfortable speaking in person to our children's pastor, but I was working in that ministry at the time knew I would be listened to and taken seriously. If the circumstances had been different I might have opted to write a letter.

[dhudson]

I think you should voice your opinion and make sure the church has rules about the rating levels of games. We had an issue with a Youth Pastor letting the kids play Halo - Jr and Sr high and we only found out about it because one of the kids called home to ask his Mom's permission. We should have been pro-active and found out the rating levels before the games were allowed. It was not a good situation and we ( the church body) should have handled it better.

[Sahamamama]

I've been to a lot of churches before we finally picked one we were going to attend. And a lot before that because we moved around a lot.

 

One thing I've learned about trying to be "seeker friendly" and "culturally relevant" is that you get to a point that you're so much like the local coffee shop or arcade that there's no reason to go to your church anymore. If the church is just like other places like a sermon thrown in there, why even bother going?

 

Having recently been a teenager myself, I think teens respond well to being challenged to grow, to be closetr to God, to get out there and do something for Christ. In fact, they may be the group most open to changing and growing in that direction. What they lack in wisdom, they make up for in enthusiam.

 

If I were in your situation, explaining it to the youth, I wouldn't take the approach that this stuff isn't appropriate for them. Really, they can handle it. I would take the approach that you want to stick with music that honors God, and this stuff doesn't fit the bill.

 

Well said, IMO. :iagree:

[Maria from IN]

You're probably not the only one who has an issue with this, so I'd voice my concerns both to the pastor and other parents in the congregation to see what they think.

 

My son was going to lockouts at his cousin's church this summer, but the powers that be decided it wasn't the video games that they didn't approve of, it was the kids sneaking into rooms and dark corners for a little...uh...brewing (tea). I think I'd be a little concerned about that as well.