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Kinsa

UPDATE: I want to meet a gay person.

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I am kind of confused op. You believe that being a homosexual is sin yet you want your children to be comfortable around them. I understand not wanting your son to hate homosexuals because it is a sin to hate. As Christians we are not to have close associations with people who are living in sin. This includes adulterers fornicators drunks thieves etc. So no one thinks I am attacking one set of people. I do not understand thinking something is wrong then trying to make your children feel comfortable being around somebody that is sinning.

 

Aaaaand it was only a matter of time.

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What about people who still think black people are inferior but are still deserving of respect and love and friendship? Is it possible to send your child the message that black people are sinners yet we still need to love them because Jesus loved sinners? The church fought for racial segregation based on the bible and they are fighting homosexuality based on the bible. There is no difference.

 

If there's a church called The Church that you're talking about you make some sense, but I've never heard of it. Maybe OP's church has no official stance on it either way, I was wondering aloud for people who have a church literally teaching that some things are wrong but that we need to love all sinners because that's exactly what Jesus did. The bible isn't the only common denominator in bigotry, ignorant people exist in all faiths with or without it.

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Kinsa, I've been reading along with interest. You're a good mom and a good egg. It's pretty clear from your update that this is something that your boys have thought about before -- how fortunate for them to have a mother with whom they can talk so openly. I have no doubt that your comments to them are making a big impression, even if it doesn't seem like it right now.

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I'm a completely normal bisexual here. I do normal things like homeschool some of my kids, send some to school, grocery shop, and the list goes on. My guess is you've run into a lot of us but have never realized it.

 

We're like ninjas. I'm even married to a man, so I get bonus ninja points. Though I do have a LGBT bumper sticker on my car, so I suppose I lose a few points for that.

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Guest inoubliable

I am kind of confused op. You believe that being a homosexual is sin yet you want your children to be comfortable around them. I understand not wanting your son to hate homosexuals because it is a sin to hate. As Christians we are not to have close associations with people who are living in sin. This includes adulterers fornicators drunks thieves etc. So no one thinks I am attacking one set of people. I do not understand thinking something is wrong then trying to make your children feel comfortable being around somebody that is sinning.

 

Wow.

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We're like ninjas. I'm even married to a man, so I get bonus ninja points. Though I do have a LGBT bumper sticker on my car, so I suppose I lose a few points for that.

 

Yeah? Well, I've got two kids more than you. Extra gold bonus ninja points! =P

 

We have the Human Rights Campaign bumper sticker. Is there a chart somewhere that explains the points? I'm confused.

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Kinsa, I've been reading along with interest. You're a good mom and a good egg. It's pretty clear from your update that this is something that your boys have thought about before -- how fortunate for them to have a mother with whom they can talk so openly. I have no doubt that your comments to them are making a big impression, even if it doesn't seem like it right now.

 

I agree. There are things my parents said and modeled that I thought were sooooo stuuuuuupid when I was a teenager but it seemed to sink in because as an adult I seem to be living it.

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Guest inoubliable

IBTL!

 

(Any old MDC mamas on here? Or does nobody else know what that meant and I look stupid now?)

 

LMAO. You made it in! =P

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IBTL!

 

(Any old MDC mamas on here? Or does nobody else know what that meant and I look stupid now?)

 

I don't know what you mean but since we're throwing out acronyms ... BLT. Yum.

 

:)

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I watched an Eagles special the other day, band, not the bird. Timothy B. Schmit commented to the interviewer that he didn't feel special, he still did normal things like grocery shop and make sure the dishes were done before the media showed up at his house that day. Normal people, musical legends and gay people too. We all eat, we all poop, we all try to do the dishes before company comes over, normal stuff.

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Yeah? Well, I've got two kids more than you. Extra gold bonus ninja points! =P

 

We have the Human Rights Campaign bumper sticker. Is there a chart somewhere that explains the points? I'm confused.

 

 

Well... well... I have three aprons! Everyone knows that only straight housewives wear aprons! Bi women wear black leather or cook naked or something.

 

...

 

Okay, you win. I will now tell my dh that we have to have more kids because I need more bisexual ninja points.

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We're like ninjas. I'm even married to a man, so I get bonus ninja points. Though I do have a LGBT bumper sticker on my car, so I suppose I lose a few points for that.

 

 

I get to be a ninja! I don't know how many ninja points I get. I'm married with kids and I used to drive a mini van. I drive an SUV now but it has 3 rows of seats. That should earn some extra points. :D

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If it makes you feel any better, I was the same way at his age. I grew out of it. I'm from small town Texas and had some rather vile thoughts and words on the subject when I was a teenager, especially that young. As I grew up and expanded my horizons I began to see things in a different light. Looking back, I can't believe how judgemental I was as a teen. I didn't get it from home either and if my parents had ever heard it from my mouth, I would have been in serious trouble.

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My thought is that hate is generally based on fear. I'd explore WHY he feels this way. Maybe he's had a bad interaction, maybe he's been called "gay" as a derogatory term, maybe he thinks gay men will hit on him, etc etc. Explore the why, before jumping all over him. I bet you will get farther that way.

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Guest inoubliable

I don't know what you mean but since we're throwing out acronyms ... BLT. Yum.

 

:)

 

 

Dammit. Now I'm hungry. And I don't even eat bacon.

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Well... well... I have three aprons! Everyone knows that only straight housewives wear aprons! Bi women wear black leather or cook naked or something.

 

...

 

Okay, you win. I will now tell my dh that we have to have more kids because I need more bisexual ninja points.

 

 

I baked bread 2 days in a row this week. How many points for that?

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I don't know what you mean but since we're throwing out acronyms ... BLT. Yum.

 

:)

 

 

How about this one... OICU812.

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Guest inoubliable

I watched an Eagles special the other day, band, not the bird. Timothy B. Schmit commented to the interviewer that he didn't feel special, he still did normal things like grocery shop and make sure the dishes were done before the media showed up at his house that day. Normal people, musical legends and gay people too. We all eat, we all poop, we all try to do the dishes before company comes over, normal stuff.

 

 

Quite right.

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Guest inoubliable

Well... well... I have three aprons! Everyone knows that only straight housewives wear aprons! Bi women wear black leather or cook naked or something.

 

...

 

Okay, you win. I will now tell my dh that we have to have more kids because I need more bisexual ninja points.

 

 

Bwaha!

 

I get to be a ninja! I don't know how many ninja points I get. I'm married with kids and I used to drive a mini van. I drive an SUV now but it has 3 rows of seats. That should earn some extra points. :D

 

 

Oooh! The minivan is worth points?? I've got one of those, too!

 

I baked bread 2 days in a row this week. How many points for that?

 

 

I don't know! We need a spreadsheet!

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Guest inoubliable

 

How about this one... OICU812.

 

 

I've seen that one...did I miss the cupcakes?

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I haven't been a regular at MDC for, oh, 10 years, but we used to post "IBTL" when a thread lockdown was imminent. It means "in before the lock"

 

I tried this one out on my littlest boy this week and he thought it was the best ever:

 

M R D U C K S

M R N O T D U C K S

M R 2 D U C K S

C D E D B D W I N G S

L I B

M R D U C K S

 

But he liked this one even better:

 

M R P U P P I E S

M R N O T P U P P I E S

M R 2 P U P P I E S

C M P N

L I B

M R P U P P I E S

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Oooh! The minivan is worth points?? I've got one of those, too!

 

We have a minivan AND a Suburban. In a heavily Mormon area. That must be worth some ninja points!

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Wow. The competition is really heating up! :w00t:

 

I'm starting to wish I qualified for ninja status.

 

I feel so boring.

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Guest inoubliable

I have no aprons, nor minivan. I'm not sure what that says about me. :crying:

 

 

*biggayhug* We still love you.

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I am kind of confused op. You believe that being a homosexual is sin yet you want your children to be comfortable around them. I understand not wanting your son to hate homosexuals because it is a sin to hate. As Christians we are not to have close associations with people who are living in sin. This includes adulterers fornicators drunks thieves etc. So no one thinks I am attacking one set of people. I do not understand thinking something is wrong then trying to make your children feel comfortable being around somebody that is sinning.

 

Last time I checked, every person currently on the planet is a sinner/is sinning in some way. Even me. I'm pretty comfortable around myself, even though I am sinning at certain points.

 

 

 

The minivan we need to get when this baby is born gets me points?? I want points!!

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I can't tell if I'm a ninja or not. I have an apron but no mini-van.

 

Hello! Missed this thread on account of having three sick kids, but I'm here.

 

Hope your little people get feeling better.

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No, my children are not hearing this sort of hate anywhere. Definitely. It is possible to surround yourself with well-educated, loving, open-minded, and kind people - who understand the science of homosexuality and aren't bigoted about it.

 

Yes, that is definitely possible, but that's just another bubble. One day they'll be going out into the rest of the world and they're going to encounter thoughts and people who are totally alien to them. In a way, it will be the same kind of thing Kinsa's kids are experiencing or will experience.

 

And, here, I mean no disrespect to Kinsa. She is the one who said she is realizing she raised her kids in a bubble.

 

This whole thread has given me pause -- to think about what kind of bubble my kid is in right now. It's an easy thing to fall into unwittingly -- a bubbled life for our kids -- because our homeschooling just lends itself to that so very easily.

 

I'm starting to think that no matter what shade your bubble is, that's probably not a good thing. Bubbles pop, and when they do, they're always messy.

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Hello! Missed this thread on account of having three sick kids, but I'm here.

 

Sorry to hear your kids are sick -- hope everyone is feeling better soon! :grouphug:

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Guest inoubliable

Yes, that is definitely possible, but that's just another bubble. One day they'll be going out into the rest of the world and they're going to encounter thoughts and people who are totally alien to them. In a way, it will be the same kind of thing Kinsa's kids are experiencing or will experience.

 

And, here, I mean no disrespect to Kinsa. She is the one who said she is realizing she raised her kids in a bubble.

 

This whole thread has given me pause -- to think about what kind of bubble my kid is in right now. It's an easy thing to fall into unwittingly -- a bubbled life for our kids -- because our homeschooling just lends itself to that so very easily.

 

I'm starting to think that no matter what shade your bubble is, that's probably not a good thing. Bubbles pop, and when they do, they're always messy.

 

Oh that's definitely true. What I was saying afterwards, though, was that I hope I give them the tools to think for themselves when I'm no longer around to make sure that they are surrounded by beautiful people. I hope that when that day comes, they have the means to filter people out of their lives who are hateful and mean.

 

Homeschooling does lend itself to creating bubbles. Oh, so easily. This is probably a very good thing for everyone to keep in mind.

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I am kind of confused op. You believe that being a homosexual is sin yet you want your children to be comfortable around them. I understand not wanting your son to hate homosexuals because it is a sin to hate. As Christians we are not to have close associations with people who are living in sin. This includes adulterers fornicators drunks thieves etc. So no one thinks I am attacking one set of people. I do not understand thinking something is wrong then trying to make your children feel comfortable being around somebody that is sinning.

 

 

Nevermind. I can't talk with a clear head to people who don't realize the very real harm their message causes to real kids and real adults.

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I can give you some ideas for being around (not necessarily making the acquaintance of, but being around) gay people - even in Texas. Around Dallas or Houston, go to the artsy neighborhood with the funky bookstores and cafes. Find a fun coffee shop - the kind with books and magazines laying around that anyone can read, and maybe some board games - and hang out for a while on a Saturday.

 

Another idea - occasionally visit a UU church in your area. I know it's not your normal choice of church, but it might be fun anyway. And since UU churches are very welcoming to gay people, you may very well meet some nice gay folks at a UU church.

 

What you will ultimately learn about gay people is that they are just people, living their lives and pursuing love and happiness.

:iagree:

LOL, this is exactly what I was going to say. UU Church and all... Visit Montrose in Houston or Oak Lawn in Dallas. Very fun places to visit! Or just go to Austin..it seems that's where all my gay friends moved to..

 

I have an idea, why don’t you go get your hair done at one of the salons there? ;)

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I have no apron but I sewed dd an apron (never mind that I ran out of bias tape and still need to technically finish that). Does that count?

 

Depends... have you ever looked at another woman in a way your grandmother definitely would not approve of? I think you have to be at least a little bit gay to qualify for ninja points, but I could be wrong about that. You might just need a minivan. *scratches head*

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Last time I checked, every person currently on the planet is a sinner/is sinning in some way. Even me. I'm pretty comfortable around myself, even though I am sinning at certain points.

This is exactly what I meant. Everyone sins, privately or openly, so is there a middle ground? Teaching children to be respectful to everyone without making an exhibit out of our differences or making them think that any sin any person might have is ok.

 

 

The minivan we need to get when this baby is born gets me points?? I want points!!

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Depends... have you ever looked at another woman in a way your grandmother definitely would not approve of? I think you have to be at least a little bit gay to qualify for ninja points, but I could be wrong about that. You might just need a minivan. *scratches head*

 

What thread was that Nigella Lawson picture in, again? :001_tt1:

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Depends... have you ever looked at another woman in a way your grandmother definitely would not approve of? I think you have to be at least a little bit gay to qualify for ninja points, but I could be wrong about that. You might just need a minivan. *scratches head*

 

Not for anything, but under normal circumstances, wouldn't owning a mini-van result in the loss of ninja points?

 

Are these some sort of special mini-vans?

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Depends... have you ever looked at another woman in a way your grandmother definitely would not approve of? I think you have to be at least a little bit gay to qualify for ninja points, but I could be wrong about that. You might just need a minivan. *scratches head*

 

I did when I was in high school, but I think that (along with checking out Wicca) was a teenage requirement in my area. :p So that might not count. No ninja for me. Sadness.

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Not for anything, but under normal circumstances, wouldn't owning a mini-van result in the loss of ninja points?

 

Are these some sort of special mini-vans?

 

 

I don't know, I'm completely confused now. I thought the ninja points were for being gay or bisexual but seeming straight. These are special counterintuitive ninja points.

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Oh that's definitely true. What I was saying afterwards, though, was that I hope I give them the tools to think for themselves when I'm no longer around to make sure that they are surrounded by beautiful people. I hope that when that day comes, they have the means to filter people out of their lives who are hateful and mean.

 

Homeschooling does lend itself to creating bubbles. Oh, so easily. This is probably a very good thing for everyone to keep in mind.

 

 

 

I'd like to hope the same (the bolded), but... I'm really thinking hard about this. What kind of bubble have I made for ds? We want to protect our kids -- from what? from how much? how much is too much? how much is not enough? when to stop? never stop? You could question yourself to death.

 

The thing is... this parenting thing is a crapshoot for everyone. You get the kids you get. You love them, care for them and, in our cases, educate them. You think you're doing well -- kids are happy, bright, decent human beings -- and then wham! You get slapped in the face with a surprise you never saw coming.

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Guest inoubliable

I don't know, I'm completely confused now. I thought the ninja points were for being gay or bisexual but seeming straight. These are special counterintuitive ninja points.

 

 

How do tattoos rate for points? :leaving:

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I don't know, I'm completely confused now. I thought the ninja points were for being gay or bisexual but seeming straight. These are special counterintuitive ninja points.

 

 

Maybe we can award ourselves some sort of confusion points.

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You guys will get a kick out of this: Dh and I were married in a UU church, though we've never attended one. Just sayin'.

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How do tattoos rate for points? :leaving:

 

 

Pictures. We need pictures.

 

We can't just go awarding points willy-nilly, you know. :p

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Somewhere along the line your son has learned fear and intolerance. While that is not your fault from the sound of it, it is now your responsibility to do the hard work of helping him unlearn hate. Make no mistake, it is hate. Lots of good people, perhaps ALL people have bigotry somewhere about something. He will not learn the error of his ways by meeting people specifically because they are gay. I would make this a pretty large project and I would help him take apart his words and see what they mean and why it's not ok. In addition to studying famous gay people as you mentioned, I would have him explore the very real, large issue of suicide and violence which impacts gay kids his same age. It will make an impression on anyone not too far gone. I refuse to think that any young person is too far gone. If my elderly grandparents can come to accept their gay and transgendered grandkids, a 15 year old can unlearn whatever it was that taught him this.

 

The first It gets better is quite powerful.

 

The book is a good read as well. If I hadn't just given my last copy away to a friend, I'd mail it to you for free.

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Guest inoubliable

 

 

I'd like to hope the same (the bolded), but... I'm really thinking hard about this. What kind of bubble have I made for ds? We want to protect our kids -- from what? from how much? how much is too much? how much is not enough? when to stop? never stop? You could question yourself to death.

 

The thing is... this parenting thing is a crapshoot for everyone. You get the kids you get. You love them, care for them and, in our cases, educate them. You think you're doing well -- kids are happy, bright, decent human beings -- and then wham! You get slapped in the face with a surprise you never saw coming.

 

 

True enough. I suppose we all want to protect our kids from whatever it is that we personally feel is... bad, unworthy, nonsensical, unsafe. I'm certain my parents are confused beyond belief at how I "turned out".

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I don't know, I'm completely confused now. I thought the ninja points were for being gay or bisexual but seeming straight. These are special counterintuitive ninja points.

 

 

I think homeschooling moms with more fluid sexualities need a fun new stereotype. We're a hard bunch to pin down.

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