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"I don't believe in homeschooling"


NotSoObvious
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Oh, go on back. And respond w/ "That's because you don't have what it takes to do it! " :D Yep, I'm in a b1tchy mood today.

I love this! Isn't it funny how people, that know nothing about homeschooling, want to slam on it? They obviously don't know the work, time, and commitment that goes into homeschooling a child.

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Tell me not to return to return to that FB post (in a group I belong to).

 

Walk away. Walk away. Walk away.

 

Ugh. I responded once and now I just need to leave it alone.

 

I should have just responded with, "Its existence isn't dependent upon your belief," or something like that...

 

Hunh. I *might* have been tempted to respond with "Well, *I* don't believe in PUBLIC schooling."

 

But I wouldn't have. Because "believing in" things is a pet peeve of mine. Really? You don't "believe" in homeschooling? What in the world do you actually MEAN by that?!

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I hear ya on the FB thing. I never, EVER post anything home school related, even "what a nice day, schoolwork done and dinners on!" because it never fails, someone takes it as a personal attack on their ps kids. Why do they do that?!

 

It's pretty sad really, whole slices of relatives know zilch about the kids interests and abilities, because it just isn't worth saying a single thing- they view it as attacking them and ps. And I'm pretty pro ps, just not for my kids, right now.

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I hear ya on the FB thing. I never, EVER post anything home school related, even "what a nice day, schoolwork done and dinners on!" because it never fails, someone takes it as a personal attack on their ps kids. Why do they do that?!

 

It's pretty sad really, whole slices of relatives know zilch about the kids interests and abilities, because it just isn't worth saying a single thing- they view it as attacking them and ps. And I'm pretty pro ps, just not for my kids, right now.

 

 

People are pretty supportive on my own page, but I'm careful about the pro-homeschooling things I share. I have a separate FB page for our hs blog and I'll share things there. That way, my families be friends who are interested can like it if they want to see it.

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Is this person just trying to rile you up? Don't take the bait. They want to bash someone and you're a someone.

 

Is this person ignorant of you homeschooling? Still don't take the bait. Someone making a statement like that wants to get into a discussion so they can air their views.

 

Also ignore any positive comments that person gets for making that statement. Don't care what others think about what makes you happy.

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Oh man, I have seen that exact phrase before and it makes me boil because it's so darn uneducated. We're not magical fairies or anything!

 

But yes. Run far and fast. Remember - be the bigger person. I have to grit my teeth sometimes.

 

ETA: I rarely say anything about homeschooling on FB. I'm part of a private hs group there and that's where I take pretty much everything except the fun school pics.

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I don't suppose putting, "I don't believe in dumb$$it statements, but wow, here they are." would be helpful in the least.

 

Sometimes ignorant people just need to be poked, it's fun. But yes, it's usually best to walk away, unless you want to toy with them, like a cat and ribbon. The cat thinks he's in charge, but it's all a game.

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I don't suppose putting, "I don't believe in dumb$$it statements, but wow, here they are." would be helpful in the least.

 

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

 

The first time I heard the "I don't believe in homeschooling" comment was from ds1's preschool teacher. She ran a private preschool out of her home and had previously told me all her dc had been through her preschool and were way ahead of their peers when they went to kindergarten at the public school. And she didn't see the irony in that.

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Obviously someone saying such a thing doesn't mean they don't believe homeschooling exists. Clearly they mean they don't believe homeschooling is a good idea. I wouldn't respond as thought I didn't understand what they really meant.

 

If there's one thing I think would save emotional energy for new homeschoolers, it's being perfectly OK with people not liking homeschooling. People can believe in whatever they want. It's a free country and I'm not the thought police. They can be familiar with it and think it's not a good idea. They can be completely ignorant of it (most are) and not believe it's a good idea. So what? I don't believe in institutionalizing children all day in one size fits all education, so why can't they think differently?

 

Whether it's a parenting philosophy, political inclinations, lifestyle choices or religious views, people are not only free to think it, but they're free to say so. It's a sign of a healthy society and emotional maturity to hear people openly discuss and calmly debate opposing views without feeling personally attacked and offended. I wouldn't demand people choose between only saying things that agree with me or remaining silent. I expect to say what I think on a subject without people demanding that I agree or remain silent. That's life in a free society and it's a good thing.

 

We are not homeschooling. Homeschooling is an idea and when people debate homeschooling they're not personally attacking the homeschoolers within ear shot. Reacting to it as if it's a personal attack is a choice. We can choose to not to react as if it's personal and simply address whatever issues they bring up without seeing ourselves as victims.

 

I don't try to persuade legislators to pass laws forcing other parents to educate their children the way I educate mine, and I expect anyone professing to be a freedom loving person not to try to persuade legislators to pass laws forcing me to educate my children the way they do theirs.

 

When someone says to me they don't think homeschooling is a good idea, I say I don't think institutional schooling is a good idea, but I'm glad I live in a state that provides parents with all types of education choices and that I feel really sorry to people living in states that don't allow more choices. If they go on about it, I simply correct their misconceptions (most anti-homeschooling is steeped in ignorance.) If they ask me why I homeschool, I give list the main reasons matter of factly.

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I hear ya on the FB thing. I never, EVER post anything home school related, even "what a nice day, schoolwork done and dinners on!" because it never fails, someone takes it as a personal attack on their ps kids. Why do they do that?!

 

 

 

 

I have a large mix of FB friends whose kids are schooled all the different ways. I post about hsing all the time and I've never had anyone react the way you're describing. The closest was one who said they could see pros and cons. All the cons were basically boiled down to the myth of never leaving the house. I matter of factly listed all the things my kids have done out of the house and other things offered to hsers that we're too busy to participate in. That's it. No one got offended or piled on or took sides. It was a perfectly calm discussion where everyone was free to say what they thought on the subject without being hurt and we were just as good friends after as before.

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If there's one thing I think would save emotional energy for new homeschoolers, it's being perfectly OK with people not liking homeschooling. People can believe in whatever they want. It's a free country and I'm not the thought police.

 

:iagree: This is so true!! I wasted so much of my time my first years of homeschooling wanting to argue for how valid a choice it is and also worrying so much about whether I was right to do it. Usually the people who are the most against it are the ones that really are worried that those homeschoolers may be right. The ones who are at peace with their choices usually don't even bring it up. Now I really don't care one iota if someone thinks I'm wrong for homeschooling. I lose no sleep. And that has freed me to move forward with friends who public and private school and have friendships that aren't based on how we educate our children.

 

I spent time at a dinner/meeting and there was a public school teacher/mom there. She spent the bulk of the meeting making little snide remarks against homeschooling and offering all these reasons why her children would be so much better off in a public school setting. This meeting had absolutely nothing to do with education; it was a church board meeting!! :laugh: I just kept my mouth shut about it all and stuck to the topics of the meeting. She looked like an ignorant fool by the end of the meeting, and I didn't have to speak a word to let that be seen by all.

:smilielol5:

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:iagree: This is so true!! I wasted so much of my time my first years of homeschooling wanting to argue for how valid a choice it is and also worrying so much about whether I was right to do it. Usually the people who are the most against it are the ones that really are worried that those homeschoolers may be right. The ones who are at peace with their choices usually don't even bring it up. Now I really don't care one iota if someone thinks I'm wrong for homeschooling. I lose no sleep. And that has freed me to move forward with friends who public and private school and have friendships that aren't based on how we educate our children.

 

I spent time at a dinner/meeting and there was a public school teacher/mom there. She spent the bulk of the meeting making little snide remarks against homeschooling and offering all these reasons why her children would be so much better off in a public school setting. This meeting had absolutely nothing to do with education; it was a church board meeting!! :laugh: I just kept my mouth shut about it all and stuck to the topics of the meeting. She looked like an ignorant fool by the end of the meeting, and I didn't have to speak a word to let that be seen by all.

:smilielol5:

 

One of the benefits of being out of the main stream before homeschooling is having time to learn the hard way that people just don't care what I think and that's OK. People really don't want to hear about it (unless of course they bring it up) and it took me a while to understand that.

 

Since my oldest child was a homebirthed, unvaccinated, co-slept, extended nursed preschooler with homeschooling in her future, I had time to refine my "live and let live" attitude. It's not that I'm not passionate about these things, but I took too long to realize other people aren't. Not every parent wants to explore and compare and contrast all options out there. That's fine. They can do it their way. If they want to talk about it, that's fine with me. If they want to ask questions, that's fine with me. If they want to disagree, that's fine with me too.

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(did I figure out how to quote? Go me!)

It's mostly one side of the family, but I've had old friends make snide remarks, too. About literally nothing- I'm not bragging, I'm not judging, I'm just going about my day, you know? But any mention of homeschooling brings it up with some people! Most vividly I remember posting a quick picture about 3 years ago of the kids in the park nearby, doing schoolwork- a rare 60s fall day in October. A relative instantly posted the kids would never survive in the real world (they were probably 8 and 12 or so at the time?) like ps kids,Ps kids go outside too, etc etc.my caption was just "great day for school in the park!" or something! There have been other things, too- it just isn't worth it to mention it at all. To say nothing of reposting an articlemor something I might agree with- that would start ww3!

 

I never, ever post anything political, either. Just not worth it with certain members of the family.

Consider yourself lucky!

I could hide them or filter my FB, but instead I just keep it pretty bland.

 

 

 

 

 

I have a large mix of FB friends whose kids are schooled all the different ways. I post about hsing all the time and I've never had anyone react the way you're describing. The closest was one who said they could see pros and cons. All the cons were basically boiled down to the myth of never leaving the house. I matter of factly listed all the things my kids have done out of the house and other things offered to hsers that we're too busy to participate in. That's it. No one got offended or piled on or took sides. It was a perfectly calm discussion where everyone was free to say what they thought on the subject without being hurt and we were just as good friends after as before.

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I don't try to persuade legislators to pass laws forcing other parents to educate their children the way I educate mine, and I expect anyone professing to be a freedom loving person not to try to persuade legislators to pass laws forcing me to educate my children the way they do theirs.

 

I like this. I never thought of it...

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Obviously someone saying such a thing doesn't mean they don't believe homeschooling exists. Clearly they mean they don't believe homeschooling is a good idea. I wouldn't respond as thought I didn't understand what they really meant.

 

If there's one thing I think would save emotional energy for new homeschoolers, it's being perfectly OK with people not liking homeschooling. People can believe in whatever they want. It's a free country and I'm not the thought police. They can be familiar with it and think it's not a good idea. They can be completely ignorant of it (most are) and not believe it's a good idea. So what? I don't believe in institutionalizing children all day in one size fits all education, so why can't they think differently?

 

Whether it's a parenting philosophy, political inclinations, lifestyle choices or religious views, people are not only free to think it, but they're free to say so. It's a sign of a healthy society and emotional maturity to hear people openly discuss and calmly debate opposing views without feeling personally attacked and offended. I wouldn't demand people choose between only saying things that agree with me or remaining silent. I expect to say what I think on a subject without people demanding that I agree or remain silent. That's life in a free society and it's a good thing.

 

We are not homeschooling. Homeschooling is an idea and when people debate homeschooling they're not personally attacking the homeschoolers within ear shot. Reacting to it as if it's a personal attack is a choice. We can choose to not to react as if it's personal and simply address whatever issues they bring up without seeing ourselves as victims.

 

I don't try to persuade legislators to pass laws forcing other parents to educate their children the way I educate mine, and I expect anyone professing to be a freedom loving person not to try to persuade legislators to pass laws forcing me to educate my children the way they do theirs.

 

When someone says to me they don't think homeschooling is a good idea, I say I don't think institutional schooling is a good idea, but I'm glad I live in a state that provides parents with all types of education choices and that I feel really sorry to people living in states that don't allow more choices. If they go on about it, I simply correct their misconceptions (most anti-homeschooling is steeped in ignorance.) If they ask me why I homeschool, I give list the main reasons matter of factly.

 

While I appreciate your balanced approach, my statement was obviously very tongue in cheek.

 

Of course I know what she meant. It was in response to advice I had given to someone else who asked about homeschooling. It was followed with the entire socialization argument. It was a very typical, ignorant remark about homeschooling.

 

 

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For me this ranks right up there with, "When are you going to put your kids in the real world?" I always want to know what world we are living in exactly. :)

 

Our world is the one with the ponies and the rainbows and the unicorns (for the kids) and the kilts and the chocolate and the cupcakes (for the moms.)

 

Our world is good.

 

Their world is bad.

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Guest inoubliable

Our world is the one with the ponies and the rainbows and the unicorns (for the kids) and the kilts and the chocolate and the cupcakes (for the moms.)

 

Our world is good.

 

Their world is bad.

 

Wine. You forgot wine.

 

:laugh:

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Our world is the one with the ponies and the rainbows and the unicorns (for the kids) and the kilts and the chocolate and the cupcakes (for the moms.)

 

Our world is good.

 

Their world is bad.

 

That about sums it up (except for the wine - KK is so right). Now we just need to help people see that this is really the essence of homeschooling. Then there would be no more homeschool haters. And those that hate ponies, unicorns, rainbows, kilts, chocolate, cupcakes, and wine can just stay in their sad little world.

 

Well said, Catwoman! Well said. :cheers2:

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Tell me not to return to return to that FB post (in a group I belong to).

 

Walk away. Walk away. Walk away.

 

Ugh. I responded once and now I just need to leave it alone.

 

I should have just responded with, "Its existence isn't dependent upon your belief," or something like that...

 

 

Ha ha facebook. I don't believe in facebook.

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