caitlinsmom Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 I guess I am not the only one whos feeling a little at odds with themselves lately. I have been trying to get into my own head lately.....I just dont understand why I have the reactions to things that I do. I dont always understand why I feel the way I do. It bugs me not to know my own mind if that makes any sense. I have come to a disturbing few things about myself this last week..... -I am judgmental, with those I love and this makes my family weary of my reactions. -I am overly critical of others in a not so helpful way and I get very irritated when someone I love is making a mistake and wont listen to me (yes I know their life, their choice). It makes me very sad that my concern comes across as critisizm. -I am a prefectionist as far as everyone else is conserned, but am totally willing to give up if I see I am not going to reach perfection. -I am in emotional denial. I like to think that I am emotionally strong but I have decided that my definition for years of "strong" really is denial. I just dont deal with it if it will make me emotionally vulnerable in any way. I hate letting myself let go because most times I feel totally retarded and then I have to deal with embarassment on top of the original problem. -I totally lack patience with everything including myself and that this makes it so I miss out on a lot of the good moments, I get to wrapped up in irritation. -I am overly concerned with what others think, bothering others, or getting in others way that I hinder the fun my family has in many situations. There is more but those are the ones that have really hit me lately. I dont like them and it bugs me to look at the bad side of my personality. How do I find the kindness, love, acceptance ect in myself when really I feel like there isnt much? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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