Halftime Hope Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 First off, if you came and visited my house IRL, you would die of laughter because I'm a *mostly normal* human being. I'm fifty, and I no longer proverbially "put on my pants one leg at a time." I now am older and more tired, so I sit on the edge of the tub. LOL! Normalcy means: - our tree is still up; I have high hopes for this weekend. - The dogs have made a novel sport out of carrying the new back yard mud-prevention mulch into the house, appended to their fur, so my carpet truly needs vacuuming every single day; doesn't happen. (I clippered one of the dogs very short, but it still comes in on her muzzle. ?!?!) - I get up with dh at 4:30 a.m., and most nights I'm not in bed until 11 pm. Last fall I posted a sign on my fridge for my late-night-talkative teens that says, "It's 10pm: start talking now." I'm just like every alternately struggling and triumphing homeschool mom. So now that we've established context, here's my point: the "grunt work" of teaching the mind-numbing skills and ensuring the mental banks are stocked with the data is worth every bit of the pay-off. Please, oh please, do whatever you need to do to get through that part and move on with your day. If you need to, set a timer and agree to book (i.e., run, sprint) through that work, and then when the timer is done, you're done: DO IT. It will be enough if you do it consistently and with enough of a good attitude to enable learning. Small steps day after day after day, month by month, year by year, and you'll get the job done. Take time, too, for joy in your day. 30 minutes of a read aloud, 15 minutes of a tickle fight, making a habit of drawing a quick "I love you" on a small palm, a popsicle together, falling asleep with the toddler's sweaty head in the crook of your arm--find your joy with your children each day. Do that for you and for them. You'll be teaching them the essence of love: we're in this together, the good and the bad, the hard and the fun, the work and the play. When you get to have big kids, even teens, you will reap the reward. Yes, some will have to "go their own way", whether it is related to academics or not, and they'll cause us to develop callouses on our knees. (I have one of those.) But if you are still homeschooling, you may get the reward of studying George Herbert poetry together and watching a strapping 17 yo male get a bit misty at the mystery of Christ's righteousness enfolding us. The reward might be watching the lightbulb moment when that same teen studies Clarence Carson on economics and exclaims, "Mom, have guys really been talking about the free market since the 1600s?" He's beginning to understand in a visceral way--not just head knowledge--the meaning of joining The Great Conversation. And, if you have an early bloomer, like another of my kids, you might have three or four years of that kind of mind-to-mind engagement: watching a beautiful, inquisitive young mind unfold and mature into something unique and delightful. Just as young parents can't bear the thought of having someone else be there for their baby's precious firsts, I can't imagine missing out on the joy of this journey with my teens. I'm privileged beyond measure. Dear moms engaged in the trenches with little ones: I wish you peace and strength for today. I know you will need it. But I'm going to go all Stephen Covey on you: please reserve one ounce of strength for yourself to remember your dreams for your journey with each child. Or do it in your dreams after you've collapsed into bed. : ) And with that I'm off to tackle my "nemesis du jour": Latin pronouns. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gentlemommy Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 Thank you! That was wonderful! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lllll Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 .. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janie Grace Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 Dear moms engaged in the trenches with little ones: I wish you peace and strength for today. I know you will need it. But I'm going to go all Stephen Covey on you: please reserve one ounce of strength for yourself to remember your dreams for your journey with each child. Or do it in your dreams after you've collapsed into bed. : ) Thank you. You made me cry, but you also helped me see what's missing. I've stopped dreaming any dreams for my journey with each child. I'm just getting through each day. And each day feels like drudgery. My friends are all jumping ship on homeschooling and I'm sitting here wondering why the heck we're doing this again, except that I don't want my kids lost in a crowd and I don't want to be apart from them all day. I obviously need to step back and see the big picture and resurrect some dreams or maybe dream some new ones. Again... thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa R. Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 If you need to, set a timer and agree to book (i.e., run, sprint) through that work, and then when the timer is done, you're done: DO IT. It will be enough if you do it consistently and with enough of a good attitude to enable learning. Small steps day after day after day, month by month, year by year, and you'll get the job done. Take time, too, for joy in your day. 30 minutes of a read aloud, 15 minutes of a tickle fight, making a habit of drawing a quick "I love you" on a small palm, a popsicle together, falling asleep with the toddler's sweaty head in the crook of your arm--find your joy with your children each day. Do that for you and for them. You'll be teaching them the essence of love: we're in this together, the good and the bad, the hard and the fun, the work and the play. This is so true. Consistency, day after day after day, will eventually reap rewards. It's hard to see in the present. We see this looking back over years when we see how far they've come. I tell my dh that home schooling is the greatest example of delayed gratification that I can think of. You get to work 12+ years educated your child. You get little positive feedback. You get lots of negative feedback from the kids--why do I have to learn Latin? Will I ever use algebra? Why do I have to correct this? Then, twelve years later you get to see if it all worked. Can they function as an adult? Can they keep up with their peers in college? Will they adjust socially to the different groups they move around in? Will they be hard workers? Put in the hard work now. Instill a work ethic. Reward yourself. Reward your kids. Young moms: you are in the trenches. Hang in there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 Thank you! I think you should send it to a homeschooling magazine. I bet they'd buy it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FloridaLisa Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 So well said Valerie. Trying to get back to the love of teaching myself and this was good inspiration! Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UmMusa Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 Wow, Valerie. Perfect timing. Can I quote you on my blog? Seriously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JuleeTN Posted January 24, 2013 Share Posted January 24, 2013 That was beautiful, and I really needed to hear it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m0mmaBuck Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 Oh man, did I need that today! Thanks Valerie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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