How old to take care of own hair?

[Wabi Sabi]

At what age, in your opinion, would you expect a child with long, thick hair to be able to properly wash their hair all on their own? My 8 year old boy (yes, a boy with long hair!) still struggles to completely lather and thoroughly rinse his hair. Dh and I are beginning to feel that at his age he should be able to properly handle it on his own and or get a haircut (which ds adamantly opposes.) Thoughts?

[Parrothead]

Is he showering or bathing? If he is showering I think he ought to get I most of the time. If he is trying to do this under the tub faucet I'd expect to have to help.

[Wabi Sabi]

Is he showering or bathing? If he is showering I think he ought to get I most of the time. If he is trying to do this under the tub faucet I'd expect to have to help.

 

 

Both. He does significantly better with the shower but still it's hit or miss. The bathtub? Forget it.

[Starr]

That's the age they get their hair wet and tell you they washed it. :laugh: One has to be very patient to get all the soap out. I can see why he would need help.

[kitten18]

My DD is 9. I would say it's only been in the last few months that she has started doing a good job of washing her own hair. I still give her scalp a good scrubbing every couple months.

[amo_mea_filiis.]

My dd with be 12 soon and i still help her. Ds is 8 and is no where near independent.

[celticmom]

I closely supervise/help my dd8 with caring for her long but not thick hair.

[JudoMom]

My youngest (turned 7 in November) can wash his own hair. It's past his shoulders. In the tub I have to rinse it, but he does it all on his own when he takes a shower. Combing it, though...oy! I have to help with that if it's not going to be a crazy bunch of knots.

[Wabi Sabi]

My youngest (turned 7 in November) can wash his own hair. It's past his shoulders. In the tub I have to rinse it, but he does it all on his own when he takes a shower. Combing it, though...oy! I have to help with that if it's not going to be a crazy bunch of knots.

 

 

Ha, we have the opposite issue! Ds' hair is several inches past his shoulders as well. He has no problem at all keeping it combed and tangle-free but washing it is where we have problems.

[Shellydon]

My 5, 8 and 10 year old girls with long hair are all independent in the shower. They do shower and wash hair every night.

[skimomma]

My 9 yo dd was able to do this on her own at about 8.5. She has really long hair and it has to be washed carefully or it turns into a giant tumbleweed. But, if we are at a hotel or someone else's house, I have to help her because the water pressure/angle is different and somehow she misses a bunch during the rinsing process. I learned this the hard way.....

[Sara in AZ]

My 10 year old does a pretty good job, but she still begs us to come in and check to make sure she got all the soap out.

[bettyandbob]

how big a deal do you want to make this?

 

I think some 8 yo still have trouble with this developmentally. I would expect him to do it by age 10. My ds was older with long hair and he didn't take care of it. It was not something I could fight about. During the few years he had long hair he was required to cut it 2 or 3 times. That was to attend a wedding, his grandparents 60th wedding anniversary party and something else. In between his hair reached below his shoulders. Then one day he shaved his head. He found out that was easier to deal with than messy hair. He had to come to the conclusion himself. He did understand why he had to get those few hair cuts and grudgingly got them.

[kitten18]

Ha, we have the opposite issue! Ds' hair is several inches past his shoulders as well. He has no problem at all keeping it combed and tangle-free but washing it is where we have problems.

I would happily wash DD's hair until she was 20 if she could brush it and keep it tangle free on her own. :tongue_smilie:

[PachiSusan]

M. will be 10 in February and I have her wet and wash it herself, then I come in with a little bit of soap on my hand, scrub and help her rinse. Her hair is almost to her rear so it's very hard for her to completely rinse. If she had short hair I am sure she would be doing it on her own by now with just a check here and there. She can not comb through it wet though, so I do that all the time.

[Ottakee]

I would say more 10-12 or so. Do you have a hand held shower as well so that he can more easily get it rinsed well?

 

My 2 girls still have issues at times getting their hair fully shampooed and rinsed. They have some special needs but we are making progress.

[Guest inoubliable]

DS12's hair is waist length and he's been managing it just fine since he was about 7. He's actually the one who comes to us and says that he needs a trim. He only likes certain shampoos/conditioners and uses leave-in treatments. He carefully combs it out every morning and sometimes puts it into elaborate braids. He's quite vain about it now that I think on it....

 

DS7, though, has really really REALLY thick hair and it was recently cut into a mohawk. It had been just past his shoulders for... well, ever. We told him last year that he needed to master the care of it by the time he was 8, or we'd have to consider cutting it. A couple of weeks ago, he realized that his birthday would be in a few weeks and he decided to just cut it. The mohawk is much easier to care for. I'm not a fan of it, though. *sigh*

 

DS5's hair has recently been cut, too. It was about mid-shoulder blade. His hair is so fine and thin that he was waking up every morning to a rat's nest. He didn't want to cut it for the longest time and would suffer through morning combings. He finally had enough and decided to cut his after watching DS7 get his cut. He didn't opt for a mohawk, thankfully, just a cut like DH's.

[Joker]

Both dds have been showering by themselves since about 8 or 9 years old. Youngest, at 10 now, still ends up with shampoo left in her hair often. I think the problem is she just uses too much, but she'll figure it out eventually.

[KungFuPanda]

My girl -6

 

My boy -10

 

Boys just seem less likely to buy into the notion that hygiene is a big deal. I think they really believe that their mothers are unnecessarily picky about general cleanliness.

[Xanadu]

My dd with be 12 soon and i still help her. Ds is 8 and is no where near independent.

 

DS is 13 with hair past his butt....He started growing it out at the age of 6 when he found a photo of his dad and all his uncles with hair past their knees when they were kids....

 

He is responsible for washing and brushing it, but it is SO thick I help braid it everyday (the braid is thicker than my wrist) It tangles dreadfully beacuse its so long if not kept in a braid.

 

He started washing it on his own around 10, but even now I don't think he always does as good a job as he could...KWIM? I still give him a good scrub down about every 6 months, I have him put on swim trunks and I help to make sure the scalp is really clean....I've also been known to have him *rewash* his hair if I think he didn't get his scalp as good as he should have.

 

DD's (7) hair is just as long and I help her wash it, but just recently she started brushing it on her own (she said I was too rough...lol). There are some morning's I swear it takes 2 hours just to get everyone dressed and hair brushed/braided, mainly because it takes them 3x as long to detangle it than it does me, but if they want it long they have to learn how to care for it....

[Jennifer3141]

I'm 42 and I'm still trying to figure my hair out!!! :laugh:

[Mommy22alyns]

Both girls have long hair, Sylvia's is particularly thick and curly. Both girls can wash and condition it and I comb when it's wet, thoroughly brush, and fix it for both. In a pinch, they can throw a ponytail in, but it's messy.

[PachiSusan]

Both girls have long hair, Sylvia's is particularly thick and curly. Both girls can wash and condition it and I comb when it's wet, thoroughly brush, and fix it for both. In a pinch, they can throw a ponytail in, but it's messy.

 

 

Yeah, M. can put her hair in a pony tail or a head band but it's not neat at all...LOL

[piraterose]

Boo started taking showers and washing her hair on her own around her 7th birthday. She had motivation - she had to learn in order to spend a week away at girl scout camp. Once in a while she forgets to rinse properly and I have to put her back in and we have a refresher. (she's almost nine.)

[Wabi Sabi]

I'm surprised that so many of you with long-haired boys responded! Ds is a bit of an anomaly around these parts with his long locks! He's been growing his hair for a couple of years now and I'd say it's probably 3-4 inches below his shoulders. He's pretty adamant that he's going to let it grow until it reaches his waist and so far is completely undeterred by the fact that most strangers assume he's a girl.

[Whereneverever]

My eight and five year old girls wash their hair independently. When they take baths they use a cup to help rinse.

[DianeW88]

My boys showered independently around 6 or 7 and did fine with their hair. My dd had long hair and was probably 8 when she took care of it on her own. She did her own ballet buns everyday by the time she was 10.

[unsinkable]

Thick hair is tricky because I think it's hard to get fingers through all the hair to massage the scalp.

 

I say 10 for thick hair.

[lea_lpz]

That's the age they get their hair wet and tell you they washed it. :laugh: One has to be very patient to get all the soap out. I can see why he would need help.

 

 

My dss is 8 1/2 and we must supervise showers because he won't scub his body or lather up his hair. I think that's just boys. Wash a weeks worth of underware and you have 2 pairs of underware and socks in the wash! If you don't remi d them :)

[Dory]

My oldest ds was able to at 8.5. My dd has been able to for a few months now and she turns 8 next month. My little sister couldn't get hers done properly until she was almost 10. Both my dd and my sister have/had very long hair at those ages. I remember handling it on my own when I was 7 and being inspected for it by my mom.