Twinmom Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 UPDATE IN POST #33- thanks for praying! Keep it up, just a bit longer!! My 56 yr old BIL has a severe, long term mental illness with multiple hospitalizations and arrests and also uses drugs when he invariably goes off his medication...which he has done once again. My aging inlaws, in their early 80s, can no longer care for him as he is violent and threatening towards them and they are themselves in need of care. BIL is currently off on a bender that is putting his life and the life of everyone around him at risk, so as a former mental health social worker, I am walking them through the process of getting him arrested on a mental health warrant. I spent the day writing out their testimony for them, as the situation is complicated and they are stressed to the max right now. The paperwork is solid, but still....would you all please pray with me that the court agrees to issue the warrant on Monday morning? Without it, I think BIL may be dead within the month...or someone else might be. You'd think it would be common sense that we could get a warrant in this case, but ya never know...mental health laws suck and I don't want to see another Newtown happen on my watch! I exaggerate not...this guy is capable of it when he is delusional and manic. He is very ill. Also, if you are praying, please pray that we can make the many arrangements necessary to get my inlaws moved out of their lifetime home and into a retirement home before BIL gets out and comes to find them once again. They are across the country, so we are doing all this long distance...so very hard. Thanks...really, I covet all the prayers we can get right now! Only God can fix this situation and I know He hears us when we pray together!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
texasmama Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 I will pray. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 Patty Joanna, great minds think alike!! I am waiting on a callback from one such service right now! I expect to hear from three more that I left messages with by Monday. I am trying to pre-screen them to help out MIL. I am SO thrilled to hear about how fast they are able to perform their duties! Once they get past the warrant on Monday morning, we need to hurry up and get them moved. MIL seems ready to go, but is overwhelmed,,,FIL drags his feet a bit and is not much help. Thanks so much to everyone for the hugs and prayers!!! So encouraging!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying for you and your family. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Live2Ride Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 prayers here! It's tough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying. I know this is very hard on everyone. Blessings to you for looking out for him and your parents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Prayers for the best outcome in both situations. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celticmom Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying here - I hope everything works out. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 My 56 yr old BIL has a severe, long term mental illness with multiple hospitalizations and arrests and also uses drugs when he invariably goes off his medication...which he has done once again. My aging inlaws, in their early 80s, can no longer care for him as he is violent and threatening towards them and they are themselves in need of care. BIL is currently off on a bender that is putting his life and the life of everyone around him at risk, so as a former mental health social worker, I am walking them through the process of getting him arrested on a mental health warrant. I spent the day writing out their testimony for them, as the situation is complicated and they are stressed to the max right now. The paperwork is solid, but still....would you all please pray with me that the court agrees to issue the warrant on Monday morning? Without it, I think BIL may be dead within the month...or someone else might be. You'd think it would be common sense that we could get a warrant in this case, but ya never know...mental health laws suck and I don't want to see another Newtown happen on my watch! I exaggerate not...this guy is capable of it when he is delusional and manic. He is very ill. Also, if you are praying, please pray that we can make the many arrangements necessary to get my inlaws moved out of their lifetime home and into a retirement home before BIL gets out and comes to find them once again. They are across the country, so we are doing all this long distance...so very hard. Thanks...really, I covet all the prayers we can get right now! Only God can fix this situation and I know He hears us when we pray together!! :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 :grouphug: How scary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Prayers and hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted January 13, 2013 Author Share Posted January 13, 2013 Thanks again, everyone. Since posting, we've been able to talk to some wonderful ladies who help with estate sales and moving the elderly, so that's a great step. If we are able to get the warrant Monday morning, I feel pretty confident that we have found some folks that MIL can feel comfortable with to help her move!! The big deal is going to be Monday morning. If I have not made my "case" well enough on paper and if MIL or FIL "waffle" at the court offices regarding whether or not he is a threat (it is exceedingly hard to walk in and tell a stranger that your own son is violent and dangerous! They always want to give him the benefit of the doubt), we will not get the warrant. The courts are generally more concerned about violating the rights of the mentally ill to refuse treatment, so the burden of proof is pretty high. We are only talking about a 24 hr hold for evaluation (during which it will be impossible to miss how sick he is!), so I am hopeful that the political climate in the wake of recent shootings will sway things our way. Please keep praying through Monday!! Court Monday between 8-11, then hopefully he will be picked up and hospitalized by Monday night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenL Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying!!! :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bzymom Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Prayers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remudamom Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Done Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 You are doing a great thing. Best wishes to all of you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rose in BC Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mnemosyne Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Keeping my fingers crossed! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Halftime Hope Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying with you Twinmom. That said, is there any way you can get on a plane and go be there with them? You might be able to get a hardship fare if you contact the airline. Back to praying.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Praying! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted January 13, 2013 Share Posted January 13, 2013 Will pray, especially Monday morning, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted January 14, 2013 Author Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praying with you Twinmom. That said, is there any way you can get on a plane and go be there with them? You might be able to get a hardship fare if you contact the airline. Back to praying.... I'd love to be there Monday, but they will be okay. The warrant process is actually easy since I laid all the groundwork and should only take a few minutes. It should be a relief to them so long as the social worker is a decent one and agrees to take the warrant to the judge. Sadly, this is not their first go-round with hospitalization or arrest for BIL, and this is likely one of the lower stress things they have had to do. The only wildcard is whether we have enough evidence there to convince the screening social worker. The best plan for me is to wait and see if the warrant gets issued and he is held over more than 24 hours. If he is held, then I can hustle on down there and help them with the hard work of getting moved quickly. That I plan to do for sure! I'll post again after court and let you all know how it goes! I should know by noon tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 I'll be watching for an update tomorrow, Jennifer -- I hope everything goes smoothly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jelbe5 Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praying! I am also a social worker and I really understand what you mean about the crappy mental health laws. Praying your BIL gets the help he needs and your in laws get the comfort and safety they need. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewe Mama Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praying... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mysticmomma Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 You are in my thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted January 14, 2013 Author Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praise God, we got the warrant this morning! Thank you so much for your prayers...this was a big hurdle and your prayers clearly made a difference! Unfortunately, they've run into a snag and cannot serve the warrant at the moment! :( . BIL apparently trashed a room at the motel and was kicked out today, even though we told them we'd have the warrant served by the end of the day. Grrr. He left in a cab (with no money to pay the fare) and we don't know where he is right now. Shouldn't take too long to find him, though, because he will probably start calling for money to pay the fare or for a new hotel. The worst thing about today is that my inlaws were informed by the court that THEY have to locate BIL, THEY have to contact the sheriff when he is in their physical sight and they must be present at the arrest both to identify him and to let the officer have access to wherever he is staying. If he will not open the door, they will not serve the warrant. This stinks...we have clearly demonstrated that he is a danger...why would you make my inlaws hang out with him?!?! I cannot believe this, but that is the way it is. My inlaws are waiting to hear from him so they can offer to set him up in a new hotel room and thus corral him long enough to get him arrested. Please keep praying, just a bit longer!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praise God, we got the warrant this morning! Thank you so much for your prayers...this was a big hurdle and your prayers clearly made a difference! Unfortunately, they've run into a snag and cannot serve the warrant at the moment! :( . BIL apparently trashed a room at the motel and was kicked out today, even though we told them we'd have the warrant served by the end of the day. Grrr. He left in a cab (with no money to pay the fare) and we don't know where he is right now. Shouldn't take too long to find him, though, because he will probably start calling for money to pay the fare or for a new hotel. The worst thing about today is that my inlaws were informed by the court that THEY have to locate BIL, THEY have to contact the sheriff when he is in their physical sight and they must be present at the arrest both to identify him and to let the officer have access to wherever he is staying. If he will not open the door, they will not serve the warrant. This stinks...we have clearly demonstrated that he is a danger...why would you make my inlaws hang out with him?!?! I cannot believe this, but that is the way it is. My inlaws are waiting to hear from him so they can offer to set him up in a new hotel room and thus corral him long enough to get him arrested. Please keep praying, just a bit longer!! :grouphug: What a horrible situation! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praying for him to be found quickly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Best wishes and good luck to you all! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathryn Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Prayers for a good resolution for all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QuirkyKapers Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 :grouphug: and prayers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 I will be praying. What a horrible situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catwoman Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 What a lousy situation -- still praying here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happyhomemaker Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Your poor in-laws! I can't imagine having to go through that. Prayers that the situation will soon be resolved! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewe Mama Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Continuing in prayer... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bzymom Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 What a ridiculous obstacle course they have to maneuver. They are fortunate to have you to help them! Keeping all in my prayers. :grouphug: . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 Praying for him to be found quickly. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twinmom Posted January 14, 2013 Author Share Posted January 14, 2013 Since he was last seen on foot near my inlaw's home and he is a known threat to them, the local police have agreed to search for him and try to find a reason to hold him long enough for the sheriffs to come pick him up on the mental illness warrant. They cannot keep him legally unless he does something (mouthing off is, apparently, not enough!) but they can hold him long enough for the civil warrant to be executed. Blah. It is a wonder anyone ever gets mental health care in this country. I feel for those families whose mentally ill family member actually does something awful and everyone says, "why didn't they get him some help?" This, my friends, is why! It is possible that we could go through all this and a doctor could decide after 24 hrs to release him. Praying that doesn't happen, but it is a possibility. I think he looks bad enough that they will keep him, but it isn't up to me. Please keep up the prayers! They are very encouraging and I know God is listening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted January 15, 2013 Share Posted January 15, 2013 I will be praying. What a horrible situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mysticmomma Posted January 21, 2013 Share Posted January 21, 2013 Hoping for a positive update! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.