hm2009 Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 DS (just turned 4) speaks a lot, but still has a lot of grammatically incorrect sentence structure. He never uses "she" for anyone. He will always refer to me(mom) or dd as "he". or skips many words like am, are. He not share with me. I happy. We going. Where we going? and lots more. Its like every sentence he says is still the 2 yr old language. DD(8) had lot more perfect sentence structure at that age. Also wanted to add - dh still has troubles in grammar. He still messes up the simple stuff like verb tenses and remembers having major trouble with grammar during elementary years. What is the normal language structure of a 4 yr old? How much should I be concerned? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Petrichor Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 That said, my 3 and a half year old boy still mixes up stuff. I think it's normal, especially for boys. He's slowly getting it. I make sure to repeat most of what he says to me. him: where we going? me: we are going to the park! or him: I happy me: You're happy? I'm happy too! or him: I sad with you me: oh no! why are you sad with me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 If you are concerned you can talk to your pediatrician. She can make a referral to a speech therapist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Izzy Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Mine have all been different. He sounds pretty normal though. My 5 year old had very advanced speech and could hold a conversation at 18 months but still gets he/she mixed up sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 Actually a speech therapist (SLP, speech language pathologist) can *quantify* this with a preschool skills test and give you scores relative to peers. Our SLP just tested my ds. I don't have enough experience with kids that age to have a good sense of where your dc would fall. Maybe your ps has a psych who could give it? It was a "preschool skills" profile and had categories in vocabulary, recall, etc. etc. Sorry I don't remember the exact name. So those are a couple leads for you, either via a speech eval or the local ps. I'd definitely follow up on your concerns. I say knowledge is power on these things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hm2009 Posted January 5, 2013 Author Share Posted January 5, 2013 I did ask the ped for his well check but according to him it is normal. I know it is normal for many kids, and I have been correcting hm for a long time now. He has never used the correct form himself, only repeated me when I correct him. I am concerned esp because he keeps on using "he" instead of the "she" at every instance. I think its high time he use the correct pronoun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcadia Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 I did ask the ped for his well check but according to him it is normal. Tell your pediatrician that you are worried because your DH is still having issues. Usually they are more willing to refer if there is family history. If you show him images of men/women/boy/girl in books and ask him if he should use "he" or "she" is your son able to get those correct? My younger would mix up stuff at that age when talking too fast. When we point and ask, he gets it correct. My younger also drops the "am" when excited even now but writes correctly. We notice he tends to be grammatically unsound when he talks fast, perfectly okay when he slows down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicianmom Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 My dd5 still says "I happy" or "I hungry" every single time. She also substitutes the hard g sound for the j on certain words, such as "just". She's been a little behind on everything speech-wise, but I have quit worrying since she always hits the milestones eventually. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plateau Mama Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 I did ask the ped for his well check but according to him it is normal. I know it is normal for many kids, and I have been correcting hm for a long time now. He has never used the correct form himself, only repeated me when I correct him. I am concerned esp because he keeps on using "he" instead of the "she" at every instance. I think its high time he use the correct pronoun. The he/she might be a speech issue. My son (who had lots of speech problems) could not say sh forever, but we didn't realize. One day when he was 4 or 5 I gently corrected him (once again) and he kept insisting that's what he said. That was when it clicked that it was a speech vs grammar issue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 I did ask the ped for his well check but according to him it is normal. I know it is normal for many kids, and I have been correcting hm for a long time now. He has never used the correct form himself, only repeated me when I correct him. I am concerned esp because he keeps on using "he" instead of the "she" at every instance. I think its high time he use the correct pronoun. Peds are not an infallible source of speech advice. Go around him. You can call a speech therapist and get the eval yourself, or you can call the ps and get evals. Either way *I* would get evals in your shoes. My ds has verbal apraxia and gets regular speech therapy. He's 4 and has almost *no* errors of that nature. He tests 95% percentile in that area. So while there's a range, I think it's a perfectly reasonable question, given the family history. You can always find advice telling you to blow it off, not to worry, blah blah. You're the Tiger Mom that has to step in and say no, my radar says it's not normal. Typically speech and IQ should match up. When there's an unexpected discrepancy, absolutely that's an issue. EI (Early Intervention) handles things till age 3, and from 4 on you go through the public school. They can do that eval. It's a simple thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boscopup Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 I would go get an eval. When my middle son had speech problems, my peds all said to wait until he was 5, and if he still had problems, get eval'd then. Every SLP I've ever talked to has said NO! Get them eval'd earlier so you can start working on it as soon as possible! It's easier to fix problems early than to wait until bad speech patterns are ingrained. My son is 6 now, and I can't remember how well he did those things at age 4. He still gets subject/verb agreement and some verbs mixed up (like teach vs. learn... He'll say someone "will learn me"). Those things will be hit upon when we do formal grammar, and I'll probably start formal grammar earlier just to make sure he has plenty of years of practice. My oldest could have waited until 3rd grade, but this child needs a lot more repetition with such things. My 3.5 year old still gets he/she mixed up a lot, and he has very intelligible speech in general, speaks in clear, full sentences with mostly proper grammar. So that part by itself may still be normal at 4 - I'm not sure. The lack of helping verbs in your son is what I wonder about. Again, I don't know what age that should be corrected, but I don't think I hear a lot of 4 year olds talk like that still? So yeah, I'd get an eval done. I went through the public school, so it was free. If your state/district doesn't allow homeschoolers to use speech services, you could just not say that you're going to homeschool. You could at least get preschool years of therapy free, and then if you need more, you could find an independent SLP. Or if your insurance will cover it, an independent SLP might be what you want. I've been happy with the public school services. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeacefulChaos Posted January 5, 2013 Share Posted January 5, 2013 If it makes you feel better, get him evaluated. I personally don't think it sounds like a big deal, but that's me. I've had 3 very different kids who all picked up speaking correctly at their own time and pace, which all fell within the range of normal. :) But really, if you want peace of mind, go for it. I had both of my younger children evaluated for that reason. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NASDAQ Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 Trouble with pronouns is very common in preschoolers. My four-year-old objects to the nominative case and to stative verbs. "Him a good dog." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sewingmama Posted January 6, 2013 Share Posted January 6, 2013 My 3.5 yo speaks well in general but still calls everything "he". He is not great with his pronouns and mixes them up all the time. . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 I would not be concerned about it at this age. We also do not bring a lot of attention to it, instead modeling how they should say it (as in the second post). That being said, I have not had any children with speech issues. My kids just eventually started speaking correctly on their own. I did have one son who did not say his "r" sound until he was 6 or so. I was concerned at age 4. A friend who was a speech pathologist told me not to worry because, "he doesn't need his 'r' until age 6 or 7." I had never heard of it out that way. The reason I mention this is that it may be reassuring to you to get the evaluation to know when you should be concerned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MistyMountain Posted January 7, 2013 Share Posted January 7, 2013 . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathryn Posted January 8, 2013 Share Posted January 8, 2013 Judging from other children I'm around, I think it's probably pretty normal, but I worry about my own 3yo because he's so different from his brother, so I understand. My older son has never used the wrong pronoun and he's never used an irregular verb incorrectly twice. My little one insists on using his incorrect grammar even when corrected. If you're worried and you can't get your pediatrician to listen, call the school yourself for a free evaluation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candid Posted January 8, 2013 Share Posted January 8, 2013 The he/she might be a speech issue. My son (who had lots of speech problems) could not say sh forever, but we didn't realize. One day when he was 4 or 5 I gently corrected him (once again) and he kept insisting that's what he said. That was when it clicked that it was a speech vs grammar issue. :iagree: It is much better to seek advice now, that you are concerned. Waiting on speech issues can be a big mistake and make it much, much harder on the child. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hm2009 Posted January 8, 2013 Author Share Posted January 8, 2013 Thanks everyone!! I showed him pics from various story books and asked him to say if the person I was pointing to was a HE or SHE....and was relieved when he came up with everything right. Me (pointing to a princess) : Is this a HE or SHE? DS: Cinderella is a she because he is a girl. So he still uses only the HE for everyone in regular usage and I have been correction him for a while now. I'm know for sure he does not have any difficulty in articulation. He is very clear with his sounds. DD had a problem with the "fff..', and 'rrr" sounds, especially if it was at the beginning of a word and it took a long while to get resolved(almost a year.) I know the verbs will take while to sink in...like he says " I am 4 now. I GROWED up." and "She pushed me and I FALLED down." I was just worried about the pronouns because I never heard anyone using HE for everything past the age of 3. I'll get an appointment with a speech therapist just to be sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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