Jump to content

Menu

Real hard to keep faith...


Elfknitter.#
 Share

Recommended Posts

First off, I identify as pagan. But really, I'm still questioning. I'm not atheist, there is *something* out there afaik. I just don't know what I call it.

 

So... My year. In April, my cousin (who was like a brother) committed suicide a day after my first son's birthday. That was a huge blow. I knew he was depressed. He was in couseling. But really, none of us (family or friends) could help him. He had to make the change and sadly he couldn't.

 

In August, I was laid off from my governmental job of 5 years. Not as depressing as the forced retirements or paraprofessionals who stayed because they had to. But still, 14 years as a professional and now unemployed. Oh, by the way, we were a single income family.

 

Just before Thanksgiving, we were evicted. We rent a home and our Landlord didn't

pay the mortgage on the house. So the bank foreclosed and it was sold at public auction. Now we're currently in court proceedings to stay until we can find a new place to live. Which, btw sucks because oh geez, neither dh nor I work atm.

 

So, we need thoughts/prayers/ wishes.... That we find a new home very soon, if not by Winter Solstice. And our court claims goes in our favor so if we don't, we can continue looking to be out ASAP.

 

We don't want special treatment. We want our legel 90 days and we want to find a new home to move to in the slotted time frame with no court or credit repercussions.

 

For those who wonder, yes dh and I have been looking for work. I hope something pans out soon for me, since I'd be more likely to find work first. But who knows?

 

I'd also like to be honest and say that while our Yule/Christmas time is ok, my personal faith in humanity is really failing by recent dealings with the representatives from the new company regarding our home. The company wants us out ASAP to be able to fix and flip the house. I get that living In a free market economy. But the lack of heart, especially at this time of year still sucks major goats balls.

 

To sum up, this year =

Loss of family

Loss of work

Loss of home

 

So now what?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Whoa! That is really difficult! I am so sorry about your cousin. My heart goes out to you. I hope something pans out for you and you emerge from all this stronger. My faith in humanity would be on the rocks too! I don't have any words of advice. Well maybe one. When things get tough for me, I often get strength from reading about people who have overcome adversity. It sort of draws me out of being completely absorbed by my own circumstances ( which is easy to do in such overwhelming ones). It gives me a sense of a bigger picture and that there is hope.

 

Good luck to you. I hope things turn around very quickly!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Times like this I have to remember this verse...

 

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13

 

My husband lost his job twice in less than two years, and the second time I nearly left him for other reasons I won't discuss on the public forum. It was HARD. But instead of turning my back on God, I fell flat on my face and worshiped Him, and clung so tightly to Him. He picked me up and carried me, and made me so much stronger. Looking back, I am so thankful that things happened exactly the way they did. God has a perfect plan...sometimes we just don't want to listen.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Lots of hugs, that's what. :grouphug: Here's hoping things finally start going your way. Faith is a tricky thing for me. I'm no longer sure what I believe but I do still talk to God and I spend the greater majority of my conversations asking for more faith. I don't think it's working. Maybe it will help to believe in yourself and your DH. Don't let this rough time put any strain on your relationship. More :grouphug:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

:grouphug: :grouphug: Having been through a similar cluster of bad things, I sympathize. I don't have a faith, and yet I still made it through. I agree with you that the lack of common decency was the hardest. Being treated like a number on a page.... I did lose hope in all humanity at some point. I've yet to find it completely (and it's been 2 years).

 

I hope something gives for you soon! Hang in there. I second contacting the news stations At this time of years, you'll probably get a good response with it being the holidays and all.

 

The saying that helped me the most, and it's still on my fridge is by Winston Churchill. "If you're going through hell, don't stop."

 

More :grouphug: :grouphug:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Elfknitter, I'm from a different faith, one that actually focuses on and prepares for believing through the darkest times, but I'm suffering with similar doubts and emotions right now. Mostly it's the loss of faith in people that I'm finding hard to overcome.

 

We have to believe that what we thought before was not a lie. We knew kind and good people, and we still know them. We believed in ideals, dreams, and human potential. We have evidence of the best of what people can be, when we look to the humanities. We also know from our classical studies that there is nothing new. Others have lived through bad stretches of time, and their children lived through the renewal. It helps me if I can remember that nobody in the darker ages wanted to be there, either. It seems as if everybody is choosing the wrongness we have now, but surely they are not. Surely they are just drifting, and many who do not discuss it are also in pain.

 

When people are suffering, when they don't think they can take much more, they are sometimes hit with the greatest losses of all, that both magnify and overshadow other struggles until all of life looks dark. You are grieving. I am so very, very sorry for your loss.

 

If your faith is in a deity, ask yourself if that deity has really changed, even in your perception, or whether there is clouded vision on your part until you can't see what you worship. If your faith is in mankind, seek out the good. Deliberately turn away from heartless and unkind people; deliberately turn toward people who are doing good. Bless those who hurt you, and wish good for them. If your faith is in nature and the natural world, reconnect with it. Physically get away from your troubled life, just for a day or so, and go where the billboards and blaring lights aren't. Notice how it's all still there, and breathe.

 

I'm so sorry you are going through this time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

The saying that helped me the most, and it's still on my fridge is by Winston Churchill. "If you're going through hell, don't stop."

 

More :grouphug: :grouphug:

 

 

I love this saying! I also like "Don't let the bastards get you down." That can also help when you've lost faith in people.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...