Jump to content

Menu

When did your boys stop trick-or-treating?


Recommended Posts

My oldest son is 12 (I have two older daughters) and he went trick-or-treating tonight with his younger brother and a few friends. Twice he was told that he was too old to be trick-or-treating. He was really shaken up when he got home about how aggressive one father was about it. One woman would only give candy to my younger son, and not to any of the 11/12 year olds.:confused: My older son is a little tall for 12, but really doesn't look any older than he is. They were all dressed as the Flash.

 

My daughters trick-or-treated until they were at least 14, but is 12 too old for boys? After tonight, he definitely won't be going out next year, but am I setting my younger son up for the same reaction if he goes out at 11 or 12?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Opinions vary drastically. Look at the other thread on Halloween dilemma. Same subject.

 

PS. I think 13 is the latest, but I wouldn't shun someone in costume at my door. (Although nobody comes to our door, so it's moot.)

Link to post
Share on other sites

My DS is 11 and didn't get any negative comments. He's a little small for his age but not itty bitty. I wonder if the people thought your DS was older? I didn't realize how big the average 5th grader is until my kids started kindergarten. I don't think 6th grade is too old at all! I saw lots of older kids out trick or treating and I'm happy to give them candy. Maybe you could find a different neighborhood or have your DS tell you which houses had the meanies so you can avoid them. I think it is more reasonable to give candy to a polite 13yr old than to a dressed up 2month old and I see lots of them going door to door with their parents. I give out candy to anyone who makes the effort to come out- trick or treating is fun!

Link to post
Share on other sites

DS (almost 12) didn't go out this year because his 12 and 13 year old friends felt too old. I don't have a problem with teenagers trick-or-treating, but to save your younger son from that, I would probably just find them something else fun to do next Halloween. DS and his friends are having a scary movie marathon in our basement and eating the leftover candy.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I went out tonight with my 16 and 9-year-old nieces, 13 and 11-year-old, nephews and 12-year old son. DD (15) only missed because she was at a play rehearsal. My sister and I walked with them and not one person was rude to the kids. We went to TONS of houses and the kids all gave some of their candy to my DD who missed it.

 

ETA: The older cousins were pushing my son's wheelchair. I guess someone would probably have to be pretty mean to say anything to our group.

Edited by KungFuPanda
Link to post
Share on other sites
I am stuck on the fact that people told him he was too old. :001_huh: How rude! People are entitled to their own opinions, but to hurt a child's feelings like that is awful.

 

:iagree: I'm really angry for your son.

Link to post
Share on other sites

If someone seems OBVIOUSLY to be an older teen, we still give them candy, we don't stiff them but we buy small candy specifically for them. I would still give your DS the good candy, b/c I think 12 is the limit. I'm sorry he was treated poorly. :(

 

DS was in 6th grade the last time he ToTed. He was 11.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Well my older kids went tonight and I just had a group of 8 17-18 year old boys at my door. All had costumes on so I have no problem with it. Some people are just grouchy I guess.

I guess that must be it. My oldest daughter says that some of her guy friends trick-or-treated until 14/15.

 

The woman who wouldn't give them candy was older, so we can let that go, but my husband is absolutely livid about the man who spoke specifically to my older son.

Link to post
Share on other sites
My oldest son is 12 (I have two older daughters) and he went trick-or-treating tonight with his younger brother and a few friends. Twice he was told that he was too old to be trick-or-treating. He was really shaken up when he got home about how aggressive one father was about it. One woman would only give candy to my younger son, and not to any of the 11/12 year olds.:confused: My older son is a little tall for 12, but really doesn't look any older than he is. They were all dressed as the Flash.

 

My daughters trick-or-treated until they were at least 14, but is 12 too old for boys? After tonight, he definitely won't be going out next year, but am I setting my younger son up for the same reaction if he goes out at 11 or 12?

 

And that is freaking mean. Shame on him! My mother said trick or treat once tonight becasue she dressed as a pirate. What a scrooge that dad was :glare:

 

We have a HUGE group that all goes together. The 13 year old boy is like the best big brother figure for my son I could dream of. Everyone happily gave out candy to everyone.

 

I am so sad for your boy.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Well my older kids went tonight and I just had a group of 8 17-18 year old boys at my door. All had costumes on so I have no problem with it. Some people are just grouchy I guess.

 

:iagree: Our town party tonight had tons of teens and adults in costumes and we had tons of teens at the door. My kids are older and they went out trick or treating with a bunch of friends.

Link to post
Share on other sites
If someone seems OBVIOUSLY to be an older teen, we still give them candy, we don't stiff them but we buy small candy specifically for them. I would still give your DS the good candy, b/c I think 12 is the limit. I'm sorry he was treated poorly. :(

 

DS was in 6th grade the last time he ToTed. He was 11.

 

My oldest DS is 10. I can't imagine him only having one more year to ToT. He still seems so young.

 

All of the kids who came to my door tonight were late elementary or older.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, my oldest son decided he was too old to go this year, at 17, although I think he would have gone if his cousin had gone - she decided since she's turning 18 next week she's too old.

 

I don't have a problem with teens trick-or-treating if they're wearing a costume. We always seem to see a lot of them out and about on Halloween.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Well, DS12 just got back from T&T with his gang (ranging from 12 to 14) and DS9. My rule? If you are willing to put some thought into a costume, you can go.

 

I'm the same here. I don't even mind giving candy to high school kids or young adults if they are wearing some sort of costume, and are relatively polite. I hate it when the high schoolers come around without costumes and hold their bags out and don't even say trick or treat! It makes me want to say, "How many I help you?"

Link to post
Share on other sites

Personally, I'd be livid. I typically go with my kids and I would call someone out if they said that to my son. My feeling is if you are going to pick and choose whom to give candy to, then don't bother turning on your porch light. I'd probably explain to my son that being an adult doesn't guarantee wisdom, kindness or manners and not to let it get to him. The adults were in the wrong in this case, not him.

 

My 12 year old was questioned by one woman about his costume. He went as a Pokemon trainer, complete with a Pokeball and giant pokemon doll, but honestly the rest of the costume looks like normal clothes (albeit clothes in a style he doesn't normally wear). Once he explained and explained what a Pokemon was she gave him two pieces of candy. I think she was testing him to make sure he was in a costume!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Dh and I talked about this last night. He said he doesn't ever remember not trick or treating as a teen. We took our 12 year old tonight and no one gave him a hard time about it. I think as long as you dress up, it's all good.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Our neighbors went trick or treating all through high school, and I thought that was fine. They dressed up in great costumes and really got into it. But I couldn't stand the teen boys that came around in black hoodies, no costume at all, and don't even say "trick or treat". Still, it's pretty rude to tell someone they are too old for it. That stinks!

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm really surprised by that. Here kids go trick-or-treating into their teens. They're usually polite, fun, and have creative costumes. Tonight we had three large groups of teens, with at least 5-6 teens per group.

 

And what is wrong with people???? :glare: It's supposed to be a fun and silly little holiday. So what if you give a fun-sized candy or two to a kid you don't think should get one? No need to get all in a twist about it. What a jerk! (You can tell your son I said so, too. Maybe not the "What a jerk" part. But honestly....what a jerk.)

 

Cat

Link to post
Share on other sites

My 14 yr old son was out T or Ting tonight after the church party. He dd13, ds9 and dd5 were together. I drove in the car and kept an eye out (my health issues right now, mean I can't walk too far, but the teens can take the littles). He (and dd13) was in full costume, well mannered and watching out for the littles. DD5 only did 5 houses and then was in teh car with me, the other 3 went for an hour. He is already talking about his costume for next year. If they are in costume, and with the family/watching out for the youngers I have no problem with them going upto and including age 17. After that they are legal adults and do not get to T or T any longer. No one had a problem with the teens T or Ting. A couple asked why they were out so late (the kids T or Ted from 830-930pm), and they just said they were running games at the church carnival. They got extra candies from those houses. And one looked at ds14 and said "hey you look like you could eat alot of these" and gave him like 12 bags of doritoes. The guy wanted to shut down for the night and had lots left. No one seems to care how old the kids are if they are in costume and polite.

 

ETA: There was one group of teens though that got turned away from 3 houses on a street we were on. They had borrowed a limo from the parent of one of them, and were driving that to go from house to house. They would stop in teh street and run up to a house. No costumes or anything. My kids were at a door when someone told them if they were old enough to drive themselves to the houses they were too old to T or T.

Edited by swellmomma
Link to post
Share on other sites

My 12 year old went trick or treating last night. He's a small 12 and could easily pass for 10 if he doesn't open his mouth. :tongue_smilie: I'm sure he'll want to go at least another year or 2. I saw many kids bigger than him out. Our neighbor girl is 3 months older, has definitely hit puberty and went, and she TOWERS over him. He has friends that are boys and are younger than him, that are huge. One that wears size 11 men's shoes. So even if you were doing an internal eye roll, why would someone harass a kid? That kid might be younger than you think, and why should their be age limits on fun like this? I'm very sorry your son got harassed! :grouphug:

 

Anyone with a good attitude and a costume out to have fun is welcome at my door. :D

Link to post
Share on other sites

My six-foot-tall son with autism came out of his bedroom yesterday dressed in full skeleton mode (including full head mask) and announced it was time to trick or treat. So we went out - he was by far the tallest "kid" (he is also 21!!!) but luckily no one gave him a hard time. Of course, being obviously prompted by his mom that it was o.k. to go up to each house, and prompts to say "thank-you" , may have clued people in (when they didn't see me and immediately guess who the skeleton was!)

Still - I hope this is the last time he wants to go out - last two years he wouldn't even come out of his room to hand out candy at the door.

 

There were a LOT of groups of giggling teen girls in full costumes out, too (including my 16-yr-old bunny rabbit) and some teen boys, too. Only one trio of kids were w/o costumes and obviously just going for loot as fast as they could.

 

Now - the teen who came up an hour after it was supposed to stop, and I had the pumpkin light off and the porch light off - her I gave one small bit of candy and reminded her - gently - it was over.

 

My neighbor sat on his porch - with a face mask and a chainsaw. He turned it on and chased all the teens off his porch and down the street. They loved it - my dd got chased three times. All in good fun.

 

If teens take the trouble to make up and put on a costume in the spirit of the day, I say let them get the candy.

Edited by JFSinIL
Link to post
Share on other sites

My area tends to accept them if they've made the effort on a costume. I've always given candy to teens in costume. That said, we had no one come by last year, and only one group this year.

 

Mine began to lose interest around age 12 or so.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I am stuck on the fact that people told him he was too old. :001_huh: How rude! People are entitled to their own opinions, but to hurt a child's feelings like that is awful.

 

:iagree: My 14 yo ds went last night. He dressed as Charlie Brown and got a lot of positive comments. I think the costume choice helped! I wondered if anyone would have a problem with him but there were plenty of older kids going around. I can't imagine being rude to a kid at my door when I'm handing out candy to all the other kids.

 

Our town has an ordinance- 12 and under.

 

:001_huh:

Link to post
Share on other sites

It's fine for elementary children and younger to trick-or-treat (through 6th grade). After that, it's just not done in our neighborhood.

As my step-son said when he was the wise old age of 12 and couldn't go out trick or treating anymore, "There comes a time in life when you just have to grow up." :001_smile:

Link to post
Share on other sites

I posted in the other thread that I thought kids should be done with trick or treating by high school. That said, I would never make a negative comment to an older kid coming to my house to T&T, and would definitely hand out candy to them. My 12yo dd was a flapper last night. She could've easily passed for 18 (yikes!), so I was kind of glad we knew all the families she was going to see.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I think rebuking a kid in a costume is way worse than being an older, in-costume and polite, kid who is out ToT.

 

It seems ironic that some folks bemoan kids "growing up too soon these days" and then tell older kids they are acting too young by ToTing.

Link to post
Share on other sites

This really surprises me. My son and 2 of his friends went out last night -- 14 and 8th grade. I saw lots of other 8th graders at our door last night and I loved it -- I got to reconnect with kids I knew from volunteering when my son attended our local public school years ago. I saw a nice group of 9th graders too. The best were a group of high school girls dressed up and helping one of their slightly younger siblings (obviously handicapped in some way) with treating.

 

Polite kids who are dressed up are a total joy in my book.

Link to post
Share on other sites
My oldest DS is 10. I can't imagine him only having one more year to ToT. He still seems so young.

 

All of the kids who came to my door tonight were late elementary or older.

 

The reason his last year was when he was 11 was b/c his birthday is in January, so he was in 7th grade when he was 12. Other kids in his class in 6th grade were 12. It's hard to tell exactly how old kids are, so as long as they aren't obviously an older teen (facial hair, deep voice, etc) we give them good candy. If we can't tell, we just give it to them. If they are being jerks, pushing in front of the little kids or other stuff like that (most of the older teens in our old neighborhood did that....we currently live very rural and don't get ToTers), we give them the tiny candy no matter how old they are. If an older teen is ToTing with their younger siblings, then we give them good candy. Sounds weird, but these are DH's rules. LOL If it were up to me, I would give anyone that wasn't being a jerk the same candy. That's why DH is in charge of handing out candy. ;)

Link to post
Share on other sites
My 12yo dd was a flapper last night. She could've easily passed for 18 (yikes!), so I was kind of glad we knew all the families she was going to see.

 

That's the thing - kids hitting puberty can look much older than they are. If someone showed up at my door in costume with a good attitude, then candy for everyone! Why the judgment?

 

I can't see legislating Halloween either. What a waste of time and possibly taxpayer money.

 

It seems ironic that some folks bemoan kids "growing up too soon these days" and then tell older kids they are acting too young by ToTing.

 

Totally agree.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...