Lizzie in Ma Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I've been waiting for it, I've been expecting it and it happened this morning. He spent two weeks in the hospital with his dying sister, her husband and his parents. He did something no one should have to do. He watched her die slowly and agonizingly and he was the only one who could comfort her. Then he held the family together during the whole funeral thing, keeping our brother in law on his feet, his Mom together and there was so little I could do except to just be there for him and with him. It's been 23 days since we buried her and he has been just carrying on, struggling, getting more and more stressed and panicked, grinding his teeth all night, all day. This morning he came up to me, soggy bowl of grapenuts in hand and just asked, "why?" And he cried himself out. For the first time since the day she went into the hospital. And I held him and cried with him. And the dog and the cats came in and sat at his feet and our oldest came silently and added her arms to the embrace, tears flowing down her face as well. It was really, oddly, rather beautiful. My prayers for him now are that his heart eases, that he allows himself to mourn, that he knows it is ok to be angry and question his faith, God can take it. The holidays are going to be so hard this year, but I hope and pray this morning was the beginning of his healing. Thanks for letting me share, I don't really have anywhere else sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amo_mea_filiis. Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JVA Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Oh, bless his heart. I'm so very sorry for his loss. This is so hard. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: And yes, God can take it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edelweiss Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jujsky Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 It sounds like it was cleansing and in the end will be good for him. But it has to have been difficult to wait for it. I pray he finds comfort and you find the strength to continue to be his rock while he works through his grief while you are working through your own. :grouphug::grouphug: I'm sorry for your family's loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashfern Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
********* Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 May the Lord bless you and your family. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacia Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Prayers for your husband and family. My God comfort you and give you the strength that you need as you mourn her loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reflections Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celticmom Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Praying. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
East Coast Sue Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susann Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justLisa Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: That is so rough. Peace to you all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lllll Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhotoGal Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinmami01 Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: so sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CAMom Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug:It's so hard to go through that.:grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dana Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I'm so sorry. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug:Lizzie:grouphug: Prayers for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geo Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: :grouphug::grouphug: while your family heals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathryn Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fraidycat Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I'm so sorry for your loss. Prayers for His peace and strength for all during this difficult time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I was weeping as I read this. How beautiful that you and your dd were there with him to console him, and that he felt free to be able to let it go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Veritaserum Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alyeska Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :crying: Praise God for the emotional release. Now perhaps some healing can start. I am so sorry for the loss of his dear sister. :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebarefootamazon Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Praying for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
learningmama Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: This brought tears to my eyes. Even though I know it is very hard it is actually quite sweet. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwickimom Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :crying: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somo_chickenlady Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I'm so sorry. :( :grouphug: My DH's parents both died when he was young. His father died when he was 3, his mother when he was 6 (they were in the same accident, his mother was in a vegetative state for 3 years). He is now 36, and every year he spends the week leading up to the anniversary of the accident in a very bad state. This year was especially worse because it was 30 years since his mother died. It will get better, but don't be surprised if he gets upset around this time every year. Just be there to support him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happi duck Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: thank you for sharing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MommaOfalotta Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 Im sorry :grouphug: Its heartbreaking sometimes when the "glue" or the strong dad/dh breaks down, but hopefully he can begin the healing process now. I will be praying for your family and I hope the holidays aren't too painful for you all. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughing lioness Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug:Losing a sibling is a unique grief. Your post was beautiful. :grouphug:to you family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ErinE Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 I'm so sorry for his loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted October 15, 2012 Share Posted October 15, 2012 :grouphug: I'm sorry for your loss, and your dh's poor overwhelmed heart. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 I am so sorry for your loss and his. It is hard to loose a sibling, especially if you were close. I am glad he is feeling the freedom to let it all hang out with you. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
torikei Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 It is very difficult to lose a sibling. Lots of :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: for all of you. Tori Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenL Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 Many hugs and prayers are with your dh & your family. Your post is beautiful. I can feel the love and safety he must have felt in your arms. What a blessing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Denisemomof4 Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:loss is SO hard. I am glad your dh has such a loving wife! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elinor Everywhere Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I am so sorry for your dh and all the family. I had tears in my eyes while reading your post - my heart goes out to you all. :grouphug::grouphug: I do hope and pray that this morning is the beginning of the road to healing - the release of emotion is an important first step. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shinyhappypeople Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 :grouphug: So glad he has you to support him through this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommy5 Posted October 16, 2012 Share Posted October 16, 2012 I'm so sorry. I will pray that God brings comfort to your husband and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.