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How do you calm yourself/prepare yourself/not lose your mind...


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..before a traumatic event?

 

I'm having a surgical procedure (the first of three) on Thursday morning. It will be my first-ever invasive/surgical procedure, my first general anesthesia, it involves the general invasion of my girly bits, and it will mean discomfort for a few weeks.

 

I'm a total wreck. I can't seem to calm myself, and I'm afraid I might have a full-blown panic attack or something. I can't even envision myself being functional in the hospital on Thursday morning. Obviously I need to have this thing done, and it's not even that major a procedure. It's really kind of ridiculous! I know that. But I feel like I'm walking toward my doom.

 

So when you're this afraid of something that simply has to happen, how do you settle yourself enough to make it all work?

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I second asking for something to take for anxiety ahead of time. If it helps I've had surgery under anesthesia twice. I was so much less nervous the second time but still nervous. I don't think I could not be nervous. That said I've found it to be not be that bad at all. And just knowing that helped make my second procedure so much less frightening for me than my first.

 

They will give you something in the preop room in your IV for your nerves. I had surgery two months ago today and whatever they gave me to relax me totally knocked me out. I never even recall being wheeled into the operating room and being given the GA. Next thing I knew I was waking up in the recovery room. In my experience everyone dealing with someone going into surgery is so kind and compassionate.

 

I'd also second making sure you have good pain killers for afterwards. I know it's scary but you really aren't going to remember any of it. It'll all be over before you know it and then you can veg out with some loopy meds while you recover.

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Drugs! Valium for anxiety before a procedure, as well as something to help you sleep.... and maybe something for anxiety for all the days before really help!

 

Knowing what painkillers I will have after helps ease the fear too.

 

Having childcare and meals all worked out for my family helps too. If I know that is "off my shoulders" I can relax a little bit and focus on ME.

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:grouphug: I agree with others, get some meds. I have only had one surgery, and to was minor, but I was terrified for the while week I knew about it. I guess it is good that most traumatic things happen around here with no warning, so I have no time to get scared. Prayers for a successful and I eventful surgery.

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I even take drugs before the dentist. My dentist is a gem. He gives me like a weeks worth of valum and a huge rx for pain drugs for after. I keep em for a rainy day :lol:

 

Really, once dh threw his back out bad and it was good I had some spare Vicodin.

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I have has several surgeries and to keep myself calm the days before the surgery I clean, make meals and put them in the freezer, write notes to my kids and my dh (including lists of their responsibilities and a calendar and time line for my dh for events like piano, karate etc) and make sure all the laundry is done. Basically, I keep really busy making sure everything is ready and in tip top shape so that when I get home I don't have to worry about anything.

 

Then I buy myself a new book or two and a few movies to look forward to afterward. I usually look at movies that I don't have time to normally watch, Elizabeth Gaskell's , "North and South" or BBC's, "Sherlock Holmes" or "Pride and Prejudice".

 

If you do take something to help you sleep or for anxiety, make sure you ask your Dr. first. Generally, they like all other medication out of your body well before the surgery.

 

:grouphug: praying that all will go well for you!

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When I had my laser eye surgery (which they do while you're awake and very aware of everything, and if you move your eye you're screwed), I was about to freak out. Then I just started reciting the 23rd psalm in my mind and kind of flew away mentally.

 

I know you can't do that for a whole day, but I'd try it every time I started to feel panicky.

 

Also, think of a really peaceful image, such as the fall leaves on a mild October day. Or a favorite soothing song.

 

That's the only thing I can think of that I've tried.

 

Personally I'd be afraid to take drugs in case it interacted with whatever else was going on medically.

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..before a traumatic event?

 

I'm having a surgical procedure (the first of three) on Thursday morning. It will be my first-ever invasive/surgical procedure, my first general anesthesia, it involves the general invasion of my girly bits, and it will mean discomfort for a few weeks.

 

I'm a total wreck. I can't seem to calm myself, and I'm afraid I might have a full-blown panic attack or something. I can't even envision myself being functional in the hospital on Thursday morning. Obviously I need to have this thing done, and it's not even that major a procedure. It's really kind of ridiculous! I know that. But I feel like I'm walking toward my doom.

 

So when you're this afraid of something that simply has to happen, how do you settle yourself enough to make it all work?

 

I don't know if you are a Christian. But I will tell you that the only thing that gets me through traumatic times is speaking the scriptures out loud and having my husband do the same. God's Word just calms me, brings me peace, causes me to "have no anxiety about anything but in everything, with prayer and supplication, make your requests known to God, and the peace of God will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." (See, I'm doing it again!) That's all I know. Worked through home births. Worked when I went to the ER with a blown appendix three days after the fact. Worked when I had to get through so many funerals.

 

When my surgeon came in to talk to me, telling me that he might not be able to get everything and might have to get more invasive, blah blah, I stared straight in his eyes and said, "You will do great. This will be the easiest surgery you have ever done and it will go amazingly well." He said, "Well....ok then!":tongue_smilie: Either it helped him or he thought I was a lunatic, but hey...I'm still here and the dire things he said did not happen (though I had a scare or two).

 

I do pray that you have the peace of God that passes all understanding (and morphine if you need it! Takes the edge off! ;))

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ksva: I had surgery this past August (broken fibula near ankle, plate + screws put in). I was NOT excited at the prospect of surgery. Didn't even want to know how they planned to open it up, cram the bone back together, put the plate on and tack it down with all those screws. Still don't want to know how they did it.

 

 

I am SO with you. If it has to be done, just do it and do it right. Tell me the details afterward. I had to get a PICC line last year to get some IV drugs. She attempted to explain it to me. I said absolutely not, can we just talk about our kids or something.

 

This woman was brilliant. She told me that she had a lot of arranging to do so she would be pulling on my arm a bit and adjusting things, so I should look the other way and tell her all about my husband and kids. I started talking. She said appropriate things. But all the while, she was actually doing the procedure instead of still arranging things. In a few minutes she said, "All done! That was easy, wasn't it?" I thought she was awesome. So I am a person who does NOT want details until after the fact, once enough information has been acquired to require a certain action.

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I had surgery this past August (broken fibula near ankle, plate + screws put in). I was NOT excited at the prospect of surgery. Didn't even want to know how they planned to open it up, cram the bone back together, put the plate on and tack it down with all those screws. Still don't want to know how they did it.

 

Oh my god! I could not have known any of that! Just drug me and do me! Don't explain or talk about it! I DO NOT do bones well at all! Seriously, at all. Massive bleeds, vomit, other end issues fine, but don't break a bone in front of me. Even when people start talking about it I get that weak/queasy feeling behind my knees. I've even seen spots over it. (I blame it on the football game in the 80's. I think it was a Giants game. Didn't he break his thigh femur? Shudder just thinking about it!)

 

But if I had been you, I would have lost my lunch. And if they tried telling me about what they needed to do, it would not have gone well. My husband knows to just tell them to drug me up, and then drag the doctor into the hallway to find the what and how about fixing it.

 

My husband works in the hosptial and has always figured someday he'll get a call from the ER telling him we are there. They'll say "We admited your wife because she was cooking or trying to fix the roof" or they'll say "we admited your son with a broken something because he fell off his bike. We admited your wife because she needed fluids and CT after passing out and cracking her head on something when she looked at your son."

 

Yeah there is a good chance it really could go that way.

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Drugs are a good thing. Tell your doc you have extreme anxiety and ask for something to calm your nerves for the day of. You should have pain killers for after if you need them.

 

It's called better living through chemistry.

:iagree:Drugs are a good thing, if you need them. The anxiety is worse for you now than the pill that would alleviate it. If the anxiety is going to make you back out of a needed procedure, take drugs. :001_smile: Call your doctor and explain how spun out you are.
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...We admited your wife because she needed fluids and CT after passing out and cracking her head on something when she looked at your son."

 

:lol: Thanks for that.

 

I would LOVE valium. I normally don't like to take meds unless absolutely necessary, but I would welcome heartily anything that would take the edge off all of this. I think I missed my window though. My doc left for the day at 4:00 and isn't in tomorrow. I'll still call in the morning and see if an associate is able to do something for me.

 

I had a good cry and decided to tackle my incredibly messy kitchen, so I'm feeling a bit better now. I'm trying not to scare the kids by crying too much, but they'll be gone to my mom's tomorrow night; then I can weep and rend my clothes as much as I want until I (hopefully) get it out of my system somewhat.

 

Then, after all this is done, I get to face my gall bladder surgery, and THEN I get to do something about my cracked molar! I am falling apart, piece by piece, I swear.

 

Thank you, everyone. I appreciate all your advice and commiseration.

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And I assume they will be knocking you out through the procedure. So at least that part will be doable.

 

Oh yes. I don't blame you one bit--I want no knowledge of ANY of this. I'm going to have my legs in the air for 40 minutes. That is a memory I can absolutely live without!

 

:bigear: I have to have some dental work done and I am terrified. I know it's ridiculous but the fear has gotten so huge, it's like consuming.

 

So you aren't alone. I don't know what to tell you though. Hopefully others have advice because it's hard.

 

Oh, I'm sorry :grouphug: That is exactly how I feel; it's consuming me. It's also making me angry, because I've NEVER been one to shy away from anything like this. I've always been a "grit your teeth, duck your head, and plow forward" kind of girl. Part of this is anger with myself, which I know is so dumb. But here I am.

 

I have some yucky dental stuff coming too--possibly an extraction, ugh--but I don't dread that at all, thankfully. Maybe because I've known my dentist since I was 13, and have had root canals and such already? Thursday's thing involves catheters and tubes and "guide wires" and such :svengo:

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Have you tried calling your doctor's number and seeing if he's on call? I'm sure he'd be willing to call in a prescription to the pharmacy for you.

 

FWIW, you will probably be perfectly calm by the time you get to the hospital, and once you get there, they keep you pretty busy, so you won't really have time to worry too much.

 

And don't feel badly about being super-worried. So what if it's not a life-and-death thing? You're still entitled to be scared, and to ask for help. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

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Prayer!! And I recite this verse over and over to myself (in my head!). "for I know the plans I have for you," saith The Lord, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Relying on God and His goodness gets me through every time. He is in control of everything, and He will always do what's right...

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Oh, I'm sorry :grouphug: That is exactly how I feel; it's consuming me. It's also making me angry, because I've NEVER been one to shy away from anything like this. I've always been a "grit your teeth, duck your head, and plow forward" kind of girl. Part of this is anger with myself, which I know is so dumb. But here I am.

 

I have some yucky dental stuff coming too--possibly an extraction, ugh--but I don't dread that at all, thankfully. Maybe because I've known my dentist since I was 13, and have had root canals and such already? Thursday's thing involves catheters and tubes and "guide wires" and such :svengo:

 

It's funny isn't it? Catheters and tubes and such don't really freak me out overly much (although anesthesia does make me a bit nervous) but the dental thing. YIKES!

 

Anyway. I think doctor sanctioned drugs are good. And I think distraction in the days before is good. I am sorry you're going through this.

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I just wanted to pop in and say that my procedure this morning went really well. I managed to stay calm until I was in pre-op, and the nurse had the anesthesiologist come and give me Versed in my IV. That got me through to the OR, and then it was like a movie--the mask goes on, and next thing you know you're waking up in post-op! The anesthesiologist even said, "OK, lights out, Mrs. Xxxxx!"

 

I'm sore tonight but not in real pain (yet, anyway). And now I know what to do before my next procedure on Friday!

 

Thanks, everyone for the great advice :D

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