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Younger accelerated ahead of older sibling?


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My thoughts are everywhere today. My kids are both young for 1st grade, but the youngest (January birthday) is doing great. She frequently declares that she loves school and is getting almost all "As." No complaints from her teacher, other than that she asks to use the bathroom too often.

 

The older, on the other hand. I've already published several posts about the issues she is having. Her birthday is October 10. (3 months older than Sister.) Due to the popularity of redshirting, many of her classmates are already 7. I can't deny she's young and from reports, it seems she's certainly acting like it. She also claims that she "hates" school and is clearly stressed out about it.

 

She has learning issues and I'm addressing them as best I can. There are no overnight solutions. School is going to be challenging at best for a while to come. But in terms of academic knowledge and the skills that really matter, she's on grade level and will continue to be.

 

As parents sometimes do, I ask myself, did I make a mistake? Should my kid be in KG? But how could I put her in KG when her younger sister is in 1st? If she were 10 days older, would I even be having this internal discussion?

 

Does anyone here have a younger child in a higher grade than an older sibling?

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This is a difficult problem to address. My twin brother and I should have been in different grades but landed up together because how could one start big school before the other. We did go to different schools which helped. Can your children go to different classes and do homework seperately?

 

If she is on grade level I would keep her in grade 1 purely to prevent too much change early in the year, but still see if you can find out why she hates school and if this can be improved.

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Are they in the same classroom?

 

What reason does she give to 'hate' school?

 

yes,my younger is subject accelerated beyond my older in two subjects. not a big deal.

 

Yes, they are in the same classroom. They attend a school that only has one 1st grade classroom.

 

She says she hates school because the teacher always goes too fast for her to keep up during teacher-led classwork. She has told the teacher this, but the teacher says she and one other child (who is being tested for attention problems) are the only kids who have complained.

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This is a difficult problem to address. My twin brother and I should have been in different grades but landed up together because how could one start big school before the other. We did go to different schools which helped. Can your children go to different classes and do homework seperately?

 

If she is on grade level I would keep her in grade 1 purely to prevent too much change early in the year, but still see if you can find out why she hates school and if this can be improved.

 

I have thought about possibly putting her in the public school until she gets on track. However, the teacher says she's well-liked in the class and I would hate to jerk her around socially.

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That is not an acceptable response from the teacher. Press her for a plan - she needs to change something so your child can learn. See the principal if she's out of ideas.

 

I'm working on trying to get her to understand what might be the root of my dd's issues. Today I sent her an email with some links to educate her about the diagnoses and therapies she's gotten. Up until today she figured my kid was simply a little hellion. Now she seems to be somewhat interested in figuring out how to approach this puzzle.

 

I feel in my heart that there is a solution that doesn't involve demoting anyone. But, it's not going to be easy.

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