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Transition from teacher to parent


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How about you make the transition from teacher to coach? I often hear that as what a parent of a young adult in college should be.


I'd also start by not answering his dilemmas but asking him what he thinks he should do? If he says something dumb you can ask more questions: how would X react if you did that? What do you think would happen then? How would you feel if someone said that to you? If he comes up with a good plan, then you can just praise him and if it will be tough offer encouragement while telling him that you think it will be hard to do but you'll be happy to listen to him belly ache (or whatever) while he is doing it.

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It's hard, isn't it? Two things that are easy to do right off the bat are (a) ask more questions and give less advice and (b) ask permission to give advice. So instead of saying, "You really should take Bio next semester," say something like, "So have you started thinking about which classes you plan to take next semester?" Then at some point in the conversation you can say, "May I make a suggestion? Bio would be a good next step and here's why: (etc, etc). But of course, the choice is ultimately yours."


Stepping back doesn't have to mean bugging out..it's more about moving into from a role of authority into the role of a mentor.


Is this what you meant?

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