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NanceXToo

This is just too stressful :( Miscarriage related, prob tmi.

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So as you already probably know, last Weds was when I got news that the baby at 8 weeks 3 days was still only measuring 5 weeks 6 days, which was the same as it had measured the week before- it hadn't grown at all. Heartbeat was still there, but was still slower than it should have been. I knew it was just another miscarriage waiting to happen.

 

Thursday and Friday with no spotting or cramping or anything I went ahead with planned field trips, just trying to stay busy and distracted and not think about it.

 

Saturday, I started having spotting. It was pink and only when I wiped, but not every time, just sort of light and sporadic. So I decided I better not leave the house. But nothing happened.

 

Sunday, the spotting became brown and there was more of it. Continued sticking around home, but nothing else happened.

 

Today, it became red, sometimes with brown mixed in, and it's not just when I wipe anymore but on a pad, too. It's been like a light period all day. I've been mildly crampy on and off. I figured today would be the day I would officially miscarry.

 

But here it is, after midnight, and it still hasn't officially happened. I haven't left my house for three days because I'm scared it will happen while I'm out somewhere, and I feel like a prisoner here. I've already started canceling scheduled events, probably can't get the kids to scheduled activities this week, I know it sounds petty all things considered, but I hate feeling "stuck" at home.

 

I don't know what to expect exactly, it didn't take this long last time from the time I started bleeding. I lost it by the next day. I dread it every time I go into the bathroom. I am a nervous wreck because I'm supposed to be able to retrieve it for chromosomal testing and I am still not sure how I'm supposed to accomplish that without it just slipping away down the toilet bowl or whether I'll recognize it for being definitely "it" and not just other tissue or whatever.

 

I am so sad that this is going to be my third loss in a row, I am so stressed over what to expect, when, how to retrieve it. I am exhausted and having an impossible time falling asleep and keep feeling like I have to go to the bathroom again and again to check what's going on.

 

I just want this over with. I can't even stand it anymore.

 

I think I might call the doctor's office first thing in the AM and ask them if they can just do a D&C or something so this can be over with and so THEY can retrieve whatever they need to retrieve for testing. But who knows if they'll say yes or how long I'd have to wait for that to be scheduled or if it will happen on its own before then.

 

I could REALLY use some sympathy right now. This is just miserable. :(

 

ETA: update page 13 :(

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:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: I'm so sorry you're dealing with this again. In your shoes, I think I would definitely consider asking for a D&C, especially if they want to do genetic testing. Or you could ask for a 'hat'--they type they put under toilet seats to catch urine specimens.

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:grouphug: I am so sorry. With my early miscarriage they gave me pills instead of a d&c. As far as testing, the only way to be sure is to 'go' into a strainer like you would use for kidney stones. Just a regular kitchen strainer will work in a pinch. That sounds really insensitive, but it is the only idea I have.

 

Again, I am so sorry for what you are going through. :grouphug:

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:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

I'm so sorry. If you are worried about retrieval, you can line a colander with a towel and put it under you when you sit on the toilet.

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

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:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

I can't imagine. I also don't think I could handle going through that at home alone.... If they want to test, maybe they should retrieve?

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first of all i wouldnt have a D&C. It is a medical procedure and though it seems like a fast way out, natural is the best way (physically i mean and possibly even emotional). IMO

 

I would wait it out at home. When i had my m/c in 09 I had bleeding and i went to ER on Sunday 9/20 and they told me my baby didnt have a HB anymore. I waited and waited and then on 9/23 at 9:44am my baby came. I felt intense pressure that morning and had to go to the bathroom because of the pressure. When i went i felt clots come out (tmi, sorry) and i second guessed flushing. Something told me "look" and I did. I didnt have anything in the bathroom to get the sac out (who has something just laying around?) so i went to get a plastic sandwich baggie. I felt stupid, but its all i had. I already had a Dr appointment that morning (to discuss options) so i called before i went and told the dr i had the baby and then went in.

 

--I know even at home, if you go straight to the Dr, they can still test the baby for what they need. I didnt have that done,but they said they could of.

 

anyway, im telling you because i think in your heart youll know. I dont think it will be weeks and weeks. Are they following your levels down? Will you have another u/s? That will give you a guideline of sorts.

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Thank you for the colander idea...I had not thought of that. That will definitely help ease the stress of trying to figure out how to retrieve it, at least.

 

Of course, it still sucks all around and I can't imagine it not being traumatic having to see and collect everything..but that is what I will do if it does happen naturally. I'm still going to call dr in AM though and ask if they can just do it surgically, if it hasn't already happened by then. I just think it will be less traumatic and stressful and maybe give a bit more of a sense of immediate closure. I've spent so much time hoping, wishing, praying for a normal healthy pregnancy and for it to work out and now I'm just wishing for it to hurry up and end already. Kind of ironic. I just really want this over with though. It's not fun waiting this out and having to try to steel myself to see it, gather it, identify it, bring it to the lab... just, ugh. :( :(

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I'm so sorry Nance.

 

I recently miscarried, and *TMI - I requested the pessary treatment option and then waited at home wearing pads. I definitely noticed when I miscarried, I had cramping, bleeding and then the large clots, and I could have retrieved the material from the pad without issue. I didn't find it too traumatising to see. I was measuring similarly to what you were (around 6weeks size, when I should have been 12 weeks, heart stopped beating around 8-9 weeks :'().

 

I hope they can find some answers for you.

 

FYI - I was told that the D&C option can make it take longer for your cycles to return. Proved true for me, 6+ months post D&C for cycle to return with mc #1, 4 weeks for cycle to return after natural mc #2. Just something to think about & discuss with your dr if you want to continue to TTC.

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I'm so sorry, Nance, and I absolutely understand why you want this to be over. You can't even start trying to deal with it, if it hasn't actually happened yet.

 

The stress must be overwhelming. :grouphug:

 

I hope the doctor can help you tomorrow.

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I'm so sorry, Nance. :grouphug: I've had three miscarriages (one D&C and the other two naturally). The D&C was the easiest and fastest. The others were like heavy periods (I was about as far along as you are). For me, miscarrying was a process, not an event/moment that I could pinpoint--it took several days. I just carried on as normally as possible (as my heart broke :().

 

Again, so sorry. :grouphug:

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Oh Nance. :( I am so extremely sad for you. This is horrible, just horrible.

 

With my last loss, I had extremely light spotting (brown) on Thursday and Friday. Then Saturday wasn't really anything. Then Sunday there was more and more frequently and then it stopped. When I woke up on Monday, there was a small "pool" of spotting when I wiped. I went in for an u/s that morning. No heart beat. Then Tuesday has some extremely light spotting, some pink, some brown. On Wednesday morning, there was light bleeding like the start of AF and by that afternoon, I started actual contractions, then clots. It took about 4 hours of heavy bleeding, clots, and then the sac and baby and placenta.

 

From the first spotting to the actual miscarriage took a week. It was horrid and awful and miserable. :(

 

You are constantly in my thoughts, on my mind, on my heart, in my prayers... :grouphug:

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No practical suggestions. When I miscarried, I retrieved a large sized clot on a pad. I didn't save it, but it wasn't gory as I expected it to be.

 

:grouphug::grouphug: It just stinks, Nance. The whole thing. You have my sympathy. I'm so, so sorry this happening to you again. It's just not fair.

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:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

Make sure that you are talking about a D&C under full anesthesia, not an in-office procedure. I found the one in the office when I was conscious to be 1000 times worse than the one under anesthesia. I also had a natural miscarriage, which was easier for me.

 

FWIW, after 2 D & C miscarriages in a row (both with heartbeats), I conceived again before my period even returned and had a healthy baby.

 

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

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So as you already probably know, last Weds was when I got news that the baby at 8 weeks 3 days was still only measuring 5 weeks 6 days, which was the same as it had measured the week before- it hadn't grown at all. Heartbeat was still there, but was still slower than it should have been. I knew it was just another miscarriage waiting to happen.

 

Thursday and Friday with no spotting or cramping or anything I went ahead with planned field trips, just trying to stay busy and distracted and not think about it.

 

Saturday, I started having spotting. It was pink and only when I wiped, but not every time, just sort of light and sporadic. So I decided I better not leave the house. But nothing happened.

 

Sunday, the spotting became brown and there was more of it. Continued sticking around home, but nothing else happened.

 

Today, it became red, sometimes with brown mixed in, and it's not just when I wipe anymore but on a pad, too. It's been like a light period all day. I've been mildly crampy on and off. I figured today would be the day I would officially miscarry.

 

But here it is, after midnight, and it still hasn't officially happened. I haven't left my house for three days because I'm scared it will happen while I'm out somewhere, and I feel like a prisoner here. I've already started canceling scheduled events, probably can't get the kids to scheduled activities this week, I know it sounds petty all things considered, but I hate feeling "stuck" at home.

 

I don't know what to expect exactly, it didn't take this long last time from the time I started bleeding. I lost it by the next day. I dread it every time I go into the bathroom. I am a nervous wreck because I'm supposed to be able to retrieve it for chromosomal testing and I am still not sure how I'm supposed to accomplish that without it just slipping away down the toilet bowl or whether I'll recognize it for being definitely "it" and not just other tissue or whatever.

 

I am so sad that this is going to be my third loss in a row, I am so stressed over what to expect, when, how to retrieve it. I am exhausted and having an impossible time falling asleep and keep feeling like I have to go to the bathroom again and again to check what's going on.

 

I just want this over with. I can't even stand it anymore.

 

I think I might call the doctor's office first thing in the AM and ask them if they can just do a D&C or something so this can be over with and so THEY can retrieve whatever they need to retrieve for testing. But who knows if they'll say yes or how long I'd have to wait for that to be scheduled or if it will happen on its own before then.

 

I could REALLY use some sympathy right now. This is just miserable. :(

I'm so sorry. Praying.

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:grouphug:

 

My last miscarriage, I found out a week before I officially miscarried that baby had not made it. For a week I had light spotting and cramping. Then on my 29th birthday I finally had the actual m/c. That week was the longest in my life.

 

The only genetic testing I had done was on myself (that m/c was my 6th) no reason could be found at that time. Though my current health issues may actually be what was causing all my losses and preterm deliveries back then.

 

I am sorry that you are going through this and that it is taking such a long time for the actual m/c to occur.

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So sorry :grouphug: I know how you feel. I M/C the same way twice. It took me 3 weeks to finally M/C - your hormones have to lower right down before it expels and that can take some time. I had on and off bleeding too but always only a little.

 

The first time I was 11 weeks along (but the baby was 8 weeks in growth) and when it finally expelled the bleeding just started getting heavier and heavier - kind of like a heavy period -then I started cramping and it just kept ramping up till it was as strong as labour cramps but no where near as painful - it took quite a few hours for the process.

 

The second time I was 7 weeks along and bled on and off tiny amounts for a couple weeks. When it finally started ramping up I was at my DD's dance class :001_huh:. Luckily again it was only like a heavy period and I had a pad on so I had time to get home. This time I wanted to catch it so I just put a pad on and it came out into the pad. You shouldn't really flood blood - I changed mine about every 30 minutes or so until it expelled. Spent some time in the bathroom for the rest and then just went back to wearing a pad.

 

And can I just say - 7 week babies look like little people :( You should definately be able to tell when you expel it.

 

The waiting sure is the worst part but I didn't want to go to the hospital for anything - so I put up with it. It's pretty safe to leave home as long as you wear a big pad and don't go too far.

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And can I just say - 7 week babies look like little people :( You should definately be able to tell when you expel it.

 

 

I agree. :grouphug:

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Probably TMI but - I could also tell when my babies had passed out because I got that " just delivered " feeling - where you feel eurphoric because it's finally arrived :crying: My body felt just the same as when I had delivered my live babies.

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This is just horrible but you do need answers. I would want the Dr to deal with it and get exactly what they need to do testing. I'm so sorry Nance!:grouphug:

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