Why does everything have to be a big production?

[MamaT]

Just agreeing with everyone else. We are the "bad parents" today, I'm sure, for missing our son's rowing team's wine tasting and silent auction tonight. We sent in a donation instead.

 

It seems to be that way with all of our kids' activities these days. All the moms are so busy trying to one-up one another. I just try to stay out of their way. :001_smile:

[MBM]

Soccer snack schedules are so ridiculous. My kids had a mid-snack and an after-game snack. Most of the time, the really young ones were lying on the grass anyway. Why do they need a snack for that?

 

And around here, if your child isn't exhibiting athletic talent by second grade, they won't make the team, so just forget it. I've watched parents coach kids who have just learned to run, 3 year olds. It's just nuts.

 

Give me the good old days when kids would form their own teams and find their own space to play sports. Because there were not enough kids who were the same age, the teams would include a wide range of ages and abilities. When I was growing up, that's what kids did and it was loads of fun. No uniforms, no snacks, no adults -- just a bunch of kids having fun when they felt like it.

 

Don't even get me going about graduations. My youngest's 8th grade graduation was a 10-day extravaganza. My son and I had to take *required* dance classes before the actual *presentation dance.* Every day was a day of specialness. Two weekend parties for parents and kids and a special Mass for the kids and families (which I didn't mind). Good grief, though. It's 8th grade, not graduation from Oxford.

 

So, yeah, call me grumpy, too.

[UmMusa]

The coach is pregnant, so "we're" giving her a surprise baby shower after a game. So...sign up for food, drinks, a centerpiece, decorating...:rolleyes: Oh, and bring $5-$15. Plus, this is where she's registered. :banghead:

I'm seriously shocked.

[A.Balaban]

And if you can even believe it, since putting up this OP, we have received yet another obligatory party e-mail. The coach is pregnant, so "we're" giving her a surprise baby shower after a game. So...sign up for food, drinks, a centerpiece, decorating...:rolleyes: Oh, and bring $5-$15. Plus, this is where she's registered. :banghead:

 

That is unacceptable.

[Stacia]

Most of the time, the really young ones were lying on the grass anyway. Why do they need a snack for that?

 

:lol:

[mom2scouts]

I'm really not trying to one-up anyone, but I just got an email saying that my dd's dance team will be doing nationals ON A CRUISE! My dd is 5.

 

Honestly, the cruise sounds fun, relaxing, and possibly less expensive than my son's senior year at the local public school. His soccer team asks all parents to "donate" $20 to buy items for the concession stand, sell cookie dough, work in the concession stand at least once, provide food and paper products for the weekly team dinner, buy photos, donate for coach gifts, help with senior night, help with the banquet, and probably a few things I forgot.:001_huh:

[FaithManor]

You're singing my song. What is up with the stinkin' snack? And it's weird to me how some sports (baseball, wrestling) that are way longer and/or more draining than soccer don't have a snack typically, but for some reason, soccer alone supposedly "requires" refueling.

 

 

Pick me, pick me!!!! I'll join the Ms. Grump Club! We are 4-H leaders and our meetings run one Saturday per month from 9:30 a.m. to noon. WE DON'T PROVIDE SNACKS nor do we allow the other parents. Seriously, these are school age kids and they can go that length of time without food. Now, obviously, if there was a diabetic or hypoglycemic child in the group and their parents needed to provide them with a break and snack, then by all means do so. But guess what! We keep working on the project and so does everyone else. We can get ever project done in 2.5 hrs. or less if we don't all have to go eat. Seriously, I don't think it's my job to provide food or clean up after it. Additionally, we don't need food all over the science experiments and engineering projects.

 

What is the obsession with eating????? Does every cotton.pickin.event. have to revolve around food????

 

Don't start me on church...the fellowship time. They have to take this break between worship service and "small group fellowship" or Bible Study so everyone can eat mounds of cookies and muffins. Blech! All those empty carbs. Worship begins at 10:00 a.m., ends at 11:00. Small group/Bible study is only 30 minutes. If they didn't have to stuff faces - kids included so a LOT of kids won't eat lunch when they get home because they've had six cookies at church :glare: - they could be done at 11:30. Apparently, an 1 1/2 hrs. without food is torture or something.

 

I have gluten issues, dh doesn't want all the snacks, we always have a very healthy dinner on Sundays and don't want the boys' appetites ruined so we either have to make them the only teens NOT eating, or leave. We've opted for leaving, which means we don't attend Bible study anymore. OH well, not our problem. It does make for an earlier dinner time on Sunday.

 

I just don't get it.

 

Faith - the grumpy, non-snack providing 4-H leader/non-snack eating church goer.

[FaithManor]

Yes, exactly. And the bolded is part of my complaint. I try to reduce trash within my own family. Aren't we all supposed to be saving the earth? ;) Every soccer game, we end up with 15 empty drink containers and whatever the other snack trash is.

 

 

 

I hear ya on that one, too. I've been to a couple that were absolutely ghastly.

 

 

 

That is totally true. I've seen that happen!

 

 

 

:lol:

 

 

 

:iagree: That's how I feel: I'm a walking wallet.

 

 

 

Seriously. Why can't people just do this?

 

 

 

Yep. That is what I think also. And - I really love the church that I go to, but honestly, they do this, too. The constant begging for volunteers and support for everything under the sun. It really gets to me. I really *don't* have hours I can carve out of every week - and yes, I know that many others are equally busy - but I can't invent time where time does not exist.

 

 

 

My dh has managed this very nicely. With ds12's soccer, he shut down the "soccer snack schedule" on the first practice and got the hairy eyeball from the better-bred moms. ;) I'm so grateful he doesn't care if they like him or not.

 

With my dd's team, I was "thisclose" to sending an e-mail out about snacks at the beginning when Do-Gooder-Organized-Mom first sent through the "Here's a list of games; please sign up for snacks, half-time oranges and drinks." I quietly refused. I never signed up, even after repeated begging, "...there are still a few games with no snack person..." I wish I had sent the e-mail I thought about sending, but I didn't because I'm new there and I don't want to be thought badly of. :tongue_smilie:

 

And if you can even believe it, since putting up this OP, we have received yet another obligatory party e-mail. The coach is pregnant, so "we're" giving her a surprise baby shower after a game. So...sign up for food, drinks, a centerpiece, decorating...:rolleyes: Oh, and bring $5-$15. Plus, this is where she's registered. :banghead:

 

 

UN.AC.CEPT.ABLE!!!!!

 

Did anyone see that episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" that was all about the "snack" soccer schedule????? Hilarious when watching it from the couch, not so hilarious in real life. I nearly snorted Perrier across the room when Raymond's mother showed up with Lasagna for the entire team!!! Cracked me up! Definitely, put the one-upping, Narcissistic, feed people until they die of food, over-bearing MIL in charge of the snack! Way to go Raymond!;)

 

Faith

[Guest]

UN.AC.CEPT.ABLE!!!!!

 

Did anyone see that episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" that was all about the "snack" soccer schedule????? Hilarious when watching it from the couch, not so hilarious in real life. I nearly snorted Perrier across the room when Raymond's mother showed up with Lasagna for the entire team!!! Cracked me up! Definitely, put the one-upping, Narcissistic, feed people until they die of food, over-bearing MIL in charge of the snack! Way to go Raymond!;)

 

Faith

 

Ha! No. I probably should have seen that. :lol:

[Snickerdoodle]

With my dd's team, I was "thisclose" to sending an e-mail out about snacks at the beginning when Do-Gooder-Organized-Mom first sent through the "Here's a list of games; please sign up for snacks, half-time oranges and drinks." I quietly refused.

 

See, I refused but I hit "reply all" when I sent the email. I also said something about being pretty sure my kid could handle an hour game without dying of hunger or needing a reward for being a kid and playing.

 

Then I showed up to the games/practices with a huge smile.

[Snickerdoodle]

I was pretty sure that someone would also then get brave and decline after seeing my email, but no one did.

 

Wimps.

[PeacefulChaos]

Soccer snack schedules are so ridiculous. My kids had a mid-snack and an after-game snack. Most of the time, the really young ones were lying on the grass anyway. Why do they need a snack for that?

 

And around here, if your child isn't exhibiting athletic talent by second grade, they won't make the team, so just forget it. I've watched parents coach kids who have just learned to run, 3 year olds. It's just nuts.

 

Give me the good old days when kids would form their own teams and find their own space to play sports. Because there were not enough kids who were the same age, the teams would include a wide range of ages and abilities. When I was growing up, that's what kids did and it was loads of fun. No uniforms, no snacks, no adults -- just a bunch of kids having fun when they felt like it.

 

]Don't even get me going about graduations. My youngest's 8th grade graduation was a 10-day extravaganza. My son and I had to take *required* dance classes before the actual *presentation dance.* Every day was a day of specialness. Two weekend parties for parents and kids and a special Mass for the kids and families (which I didn't mind). Good grief, though. It's 8th grade, not graduation from Oxford.[/b]

 

So, yeah, call me grumpy, too.

OH my goodness, YES!!!

I *think* I graduated from preschool back in the day.

Now there is Kindergarten graduation (which I'm convinced is just for cuteness and pictures. I mean, really?!); our PS has 4th grade graduation (middle school starts at 5th grade, so they switch buildings -- I find this one really odd); I know of 8th grade graduations (some of which are a HUGE to-do); and of course high school (the only one I see any merit in. Well, besides college, of course).

Also, high school graduations are a lot bigger than college ones around here. The people we know, their kid graduates from high school and everyone gets an invite to a party (if not the graduation itself), a picture, they post a ton about it on FB, etc, etc... kid graduates from high school and it's a blip on the radar, they might mention it in passing or post a few pics on FB. I think I know why (kid is an adult now, different family dynamics, etc) but it's just interesting to see...

See, I refused but I hit "reply all" when I sent the email. I also said something about being pretty sure my kid could handle an hour game without dying of hunger or needing a reward for being a kid and playing.

 

Then I showed up to the games/practices with a huge smile.

Love it. :D :lol:

[KungFuPanda]

:: Dons fireproof suit::

 

Honestly, I've heard a LOT more people bragging about opting out of the busyness. It seems to me that being 'above' the rat race is the new rich and boasting about hectic schedules is soooooo five years ago.

 

:: bravely runs away::

[FaithManor]

COLOR=green]Don't even get me going about graduations. My youngest's 8th grade graduation was a 10-day extravaganza. My son and I had to take *required* dance classes before the actual *presentation dance.* Every day was a day of specialness. Two weekend parties for parents and kids and a special Mass for the kids and families (which I didn't mind). Good grief, though. It's 8th grade, not graduation from Oxford.[/color

 

OH good gravy! I didn't party that much when I graduated from college and that was after surviving a VERY grueling piano performance major that made my K-12 years seem like nothing more than a pleasant stroll in the park! I must be too pragmatic. I really didn't want to attend my high school graduation ( I was the valedictorian too, :lol:), and only barely wanted to attend the college one. Maybe there is something really wrong with me! That's probably a fairly accurate assessment. :D

 

Kindergarten graduations just crack me up to...I remember when ds was in kindy...his only year in a brick and mortar school. They actually wanted to have cap and gowns, professional photos, reception afterward, professionally printed diplomas and presentation folders, etc. FOR WHAT??? Half-Day fun, fun school? I refused to take him. I know that sounds so grinchy, but honestly I knew we were homeschooling the next year and that I'd be requiring a heck of a lot more effort than in kindy...I didn't want him to think the end all and be all of the educational work experience had just happened to him. Seriously, more to come little buddy, a.lot.more.to.come. and momma isn't throwing a party every single time you draw a picture or solve a math problem.

 

No wonder there is so much narcissism in the world!

 

Faith

[Guest]

:: Dons fireproof suit::

 

Honestly, I've heard a LOT more people bragging about opting out of the busyness. It seems to me that being 'above' the rat race is the new rich and boasting about hectic schedules is soooooo five years ago.

 

:: bravely runs away::

 

Really? I mean, I'm not gonna throw flames, but I have not seen that at all. My obnoxious SIL (about whom I've posted here many times) still brags about her *past* busyness. "When my kids were 12, they were non-stop from 6:00am to 11pm, etc., etc., etc." and "My car has 179,000 miles on it and I only drive back and forth to Mt. Airy."

 

I wish I would meet some people who would brag that they are stopping the madness. Most people seem to be ramping up the madness IME.

[PeacefulChaos]

Really? I mean, I'm not gonna throw flames, but I have not seen that at all. My obnoxious SIL (about whom I've posted here many times) still brags about her *past* busyness. "When my kids were 12, they were non-stop from 6:00am to 11pm, etc., etc., etc." and "My car has 179,000 miles on it and I only drive back and forth to Mt. Airy."

 

I wish I would meet some people who would brag that they are stopping the madness. Most people seem to be ramping up the madness IME.

 

I've also seen some of both.

What bugs me the most about the ones I know IRL who have ditched the busyness is their attitude about it. 'Oh, we would do that, but we've determined that it's much more important for us to spend time together as a family.' All said in a sort of condescending tone.

I'm all for that decision, don't get me wrong. To each their own -- I try to find balance as much as possible, and honestly right now the kids aren't involved in any sports so I feel like we have too much free time (that's just my personality, though - and it's why I've now got lists of subjects to be studied through Pink's graduation from HS! :lol: It doesn't bother anyone else, though.)

But yeah, I've seen both. Parenting has become such a competitive spectator sport though, that it isn't surprising, unfortunately. :(

[KungFuPanda]

Really? I mean, I'm not gonna throw flames, but I have not seen that at all. My obnoxious SIL (about whom I've posted here many times) still brags about her *past* busyness. "When my kids were 12, they were non-stop from 6:00am to 11pm, etc., etc., etc." and "My car has 179,000 miles on it and I only drive back and forth to Mt. Airy."

 

I wish I would meet some people who would brag that they are stopping the madness. Most people seem to be ramping up the madness IME.

 

Well, it IS entirely possible that I've weeded out the majority of the crazies and have surrounded myself with folks as tired and old as me. :D

[NotSoObvious]

Omg. I'm dying over here! This thread is great.

 

And it's my turn for snack on Saturday.

[KungFuPanda]

Omg. I'm dying over here! This thread is great.

 

And it's my turn for snack on Saturday.

 

Bag-o-salad and water. I DARE you!

[NotSoObvious]

Bag-o-salad and water. I DARE you!

 

Hahahaha.

so far, my favorite comments have been, "what are they, hobbits?" And, "they just lay in the grass, they don't need a snack for that!"

 

I honestly have tears running down my face.