Looking for large family minimalism resources...

[Pretty in Pink]

I'm not Pretty in Pink, but the photos are in this thread:

http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/showthread.php?t=354011&page=8

 

(Scroll down to post #73 & prepare to be wowed! :001_smile:)

 

Thanks for that, Stacia! I was feeling too lazy to look up that thread. Ha ha! :001_smile:

[lovinmomma]

I'm not Pretty in Pink, but the photos are in this thread:

http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/showthread.php?t=354011&page=8

 

(Scroll down to post #73 & prepare to be wowed! :001_smile:)

 

:drool5: :001_tt1:

[regentrude]

You lost me on the laundry reasoning too. You wear an outfit every day. You generate the same amount of laundry every day. An excess of clothes just allows you to get in a REALLY deep laundry hole. I do insist that everybody have enough clothes that I can put off laundry for one week, but an ability to put it off for 2-4 weeks is something I do NOT want to cope with.

 

The bolded is exactly what I am talking about. I do laundry when I have a full load, and it takes me about a week to collect a dark load for our small family. A true possession-minimalist might argue that a boy does not need six pairs of shorts, but should get by with two. My argument was that this would mean more frequent laundry than otherwise necessary for a small family like ours (for large families, this is not an issue because they always have plenty of laundry), so minimizing clothing will create more work. Thus, reducing possessions below a certain minimum will not longer simplify life.

I am not talking about enough clothes for four weeks, LOL. None of us has enough clothes for that.

[Guest]

I found it helpful not to ask 'Will I ever use this?' but "Will I use this enough to make it worth keeping?' It's a whole different question. Also, I accept that one day I WILL want to use something I got rid of, but that risk is WORTH clearing out 50 other things that I will never miss.

 

The book thing was tough, but I'm over it. It helps to treat the library like your own, remote bookcase. I have more than enough books to keep us reading if we lose power for a week. After that, it's unnecessary to hoard more. I'm trying to only keep books I know I will read again or books that are no longer in print. I do NOT need to OWN Treasure Island (or thousands like it). I can always get it easily.

 

I still have work to do in my basement, but it's because I'm lazy, not because I can't let go. :D

 

This is really good advice; thanks for it! :001_smile: I am totally illogical about books and I know it. Fear of loss kicks in. And here a poster on WTM had to go an ask if anyone had that old Don Aslett cleaning book because she wanted a particular reference in there and voila! :D It reinforces my pride that I am my own reference librarian and I'm just so darned pleased when I have exactly what is desired. :D I'm such an addict. I can't even pretend otherwise.

 

Funny in this thread to get a post with several links on minimalism instead of a select 1-2, lol!!

 

:lol: That just cracked me right up!

 

Here's my major issue: children's belongings, particularly books and stuffed animals. I cannot even entertain the thought of trying to wrest those things from their kung fu grip. Even my teenager is totally stuck on her millions of Warrior Cat books and about fifty stuffed animals that are like air to her. Little man has way more than necessary as well. I don't know any way to make them choose to pare down and I don't have a heart of stone that would be necessary to oust them on my own volition.

[lovinmomma]

 

 

Here's my major issue: children's belongings, particularly books and stuffed animals. I cannot even entertain the thought of trying to wrest those things from their kung fu grip. Even my teenager is totally stuck on her millions of Warrior Cat books and about fifty stuffed animals that are like air to her. Little man has way more than necessary as well. I don't know any way to make them choose to pare down and I don't have a heart of stone that would be necessary to oust them on my own volition.

 

I despise stuffed animals. They're my arch nemesis. Gah! Just thinking about all of them all over my children's floor makes me do this :willy_nilly:

[regentrude]

Here's my major issue: children's belongings, particularly books and stuffed animals. I cannot even entertain the thought of trying to wrest those things from their kung fu grip. Even my teenager is totally stuck on her millions of Warrior Cat books and about fifty stuffed animals that are like air to her. Little man has way more than necessary as well. I don't know any way to make them choose to pare down and I don't have a heart of stone that would be necessary to oust them on my own volition.

 

What helped my children let go of the majority of their stuffed animals was seeing that they could do good elsewhere: we donated them to the kids in a domestic violence shelter.

I do not make my kids give up their belongings until they are ready. They have discovered the joy of trading books in at the used book store and will let go of outgrown books when they are ready and replace them with (fewer books) of current interest.

[greenvneck]

Sadly, most minimalists ditch the books and are heavily dependent on electronic devices.

 

I enjoy reading various minimalist blogs, but agree that most of the bloggers do not have children, or only have one young child.

 

I was actually just thinking about this today. In the last year I have removed 700+ books from our house...and that was not my largest book purge. I can tell you exactly which three books I wish I either still owned or still DO own but don't know where they are located; all three of those are available from the library and really aren't necessary to daily life.

 

We (meaning my family) are heavily dependent upon electronic devices and we have no problem with that. Dh and I read books, magazines, and blogs on our iPads (to the kids and for our own enjoyment) and I also have a Kindle that the kids can use when they want. I'm genuinely curious as to why you wrote that it's sad to do so? I have wondered if, when our younger kids see us with our iPads or Kindle, they think we're playing games when we're actually reading. We still have hundreds and hundreds of books in our house, it's not like it's all electronic all the time!

[fraidycat]

I do laundry every day. And unless there are new items to be washed for the first couple of times, I do not sort into colors or sometimes not even between clothes/towels. It depends on my mood that day and if I have enough of each for a full load. :) Purging has helped me summit Mt. Foldmore (all the laundry done and put away) a lot easier and more often. Usually it was done, but not put away...because the drawers and closets were such a mess it was hard to put it away!

 

As for getting rid of kids' things. I just told mine nothing NEW was allowed in because we didn't have room. Either purge or survive with what you've got. Then, I bartered/bought the stuff off of them (we played Pawn Stars). I got to donate what they didn't want - they got cash to buy something new that they'd been wanting. I thought I was going to have trouble with DS letting go of things, but he wanted to do it again the next day!!

 

We still have a long way to go before we can declare ourselves minimalist - or even that our life is simpler, but we're getting closer with each and every purge and it feels wonderful!

[Guest]

Okay, here's another question for people who do well with managing kids' stuff/clutter: What do you do about gifts and gift-giving occasions? I feel like I am on the conservative side when Christmas rolls around, but I do still want them to have a nice pile of things they will be very happy about receiving. (Granted, this is not as much of an issue as they get older and don't want toys so much as ipods and things.) Aside from what we give them for Christmas, there's all the stuff that comes from Grammy or other well-meaning folks. My mom often gives them hand-made things and those are almost impossible to ever purge. I am well aware that my mother will not be here forever and pitching out those things seems like the worse of stone-heartedness.

 

And then there are the art and craft projects they made. :001_unsure: I have an interesting sculpture in my living room that has been there for a year. That has been okay; I'm not aiming for all Martha Stewart, all the time. But I'm over it. I don't know whether to appeal to reason with the artist, sneak it away and see if it is noticed or just go for dumpster and figure if it ever come up, he'll get over it. This is when I envy my military friends who always have the handy excuse..."Well, we're moving to Japan and we can only bring the things we absolutely cannot live without..."

[regentrude]

Okay, here's another question for people who do well with managing kids' stuff/clutter: What do you do about gifts and gift-giving occasions?

 

We give gifts on Chirstmas and birthday, but never bought toys in between. We limited toys to few quality toys (lots of playmobil) on which we splurged, and no cheap plastic clutter.

Aside from what we give them for Christmas, there's all the stuff that comes from Grammy or other well-meaning folks. My mom often gives them hand-made things and those are almost impossible to ever purge. I am well aware that my mother will not be here forever and pitching out those things seems like the worse of stone-heartedness.

 

Our kids get a few gifts from one set of grandparents and from my sister. We do not exchange gifts with the extended family.

What kind of hand made thinsg does your mother give? Can you store them in a special box, or are they clothes? Give me an idea.

 

And then there are the art and craft projects they made.

 

Allocate a certain space to storage of arts and crafts project- a shelf, a box, a cupboard. When it is filled, they must go through and purge. They may keep a certain amount of stuff each year. I have one flat document storage box (pizza box size) per child per year for long term keeping of schoolwork, creative writing, art, performance programs etc.

I suggest you take pictures of each larger piece of artwork, store them digitally, and toss the original.

[2squared]

What do you do about gifts and gift-giving occasions?

 

We give toys at Christmas. Like a PP, we usually invest in high quality toys to add to what we already have. We own a lot of Playmobil, and we will be getting more in December. Before Christmas I purge toys in preparation for the new stuff. After Christmas I purge again. Just b/c the kids received a gift doesn't mean we keep it. They get a lot of junk that gets donated pretty quickly. I let them play with it for about a month, and then it goes.

 

This philosophy applies to hand made gifts as well. Just b/c someone made something for us doesn't mean that we keep it. My grandmother loved to knit, and every year of my childhood she knitted me hats, scarves, and mittens. I have a small memory box of my own with 2 baby sized pairs of mitten she knitted.

 

And then there are the art and craft projects they made.

 

I display art things for a little while, and then they get tossed or recycled. It's just practical. I can't be expected to hang or hold onto every picture or project 5 kids make over 18 years.

 

Now, I do help them treasure memories. For instance, we do have a memory box where we put little momentos. It's about 18"x12" and it holds momentos from the past 4 years. We love looking through the memory box. Each kid also has their own photo book for each year of their life. They love looking at those as well.

 

Once you start donating, tossing, and recycling, your kids will be used to the process. My kids expect me to clear the house of clutter, and they actually appreciate it in their kid way. When we pick up the house before dinner, my littles put their artwork in the recycling bin. If they aren't ready to part with their pictures, they are allowed to hang their pictures in their room. Truly, though, they have been conditioned to not keep things.

[Pretty in Pink]

Okay, here's another question for people who do well with managing kids' stuff/clutter: What do you do about gifts and gift-giving occasions? I feel like I am on the conservative side when Christmas rolls around, but I do still want them to have a nice pile of things they will be very happy about receiving. (Granted, this is not as much of an issue as they get older and don't want toys so much as ipods and things.) Aside from what we give them for Christmas, there's all the stuff that comes from Grammy or other well-meaning folks. My mom often gives them hand-made things and those are almost impossible to ever purge. I am well aware that my mother will not be here forever and pitching out those things seems like the worse of stone-heartedness.

 

And then there are the art and craft projects they made. :001_unsure: I have an interesting sculpture in my living room that has been there for a year. That has been okay; I'm not aiming for all Martha Stewart, all the time. But I'm over it. I don't know whether to appeal to reason with the artist, sneak it away and see if it is noticed or just go for dumpster and figure if it ever come up, he'll get over it. This is when I envy my military friends who always have the handy excuse..."Well, we're moving to Japan and we can only bring the things we absolutely cannot live without..."

 

We give few gifts for Christmas and birthdays -- some people do the four gift rule: something to wear, something to read, something you want, and something you need. Sometimes the 'something you want' is a shared gift amongst our boys -- for example, a video game system was a shared gift one year. 'Something to read' could be a physical book or a gift card for Kindle. We also give experiences as gifts -- trips, a class of some sort, tickets to a concert, play, theme park, museum, etc., indoor skydiving, zip lining, behind the scenes at a zoo or aquarium...

 

We give food as gifts, and by that I mean that one of the main things we do to celebrate on holidays is prepare special meals together. The birthday boy gets his favorite meal for supper and it's a big production; that's a gift in itself. Christmas stockings are filled with tasty treats that I only make once a year -- special cookies, pastries, or seasonal fruit (my kids think a pomegranate is a REAL treat! ha ha!)

 

My experience with gifts from extended family has been that they are mostly junk that break and end up in the trash within a few weeks at best. I hate seeing all of that waste. I do reuse or recycle the parts that I can (my kids have a container of errant game pieces that they use to create new games out of, for example) but mostly that stuff just ends up in the garbage can. Handmade gifts are trashed or thrifted when they are no longer servicable or being used by the recipient.

 

I don't hang onto children's art forever. We do have a few art wires in the house to display current drawings/paintings/what have you. If they paint on stretched canvas, say at art class, I save those and hang them on the walls (well, I rotate them because we have quite a collection). I do recycle their paper creations because I just can't hang onto them.

 

I've seen some fun pins floating around Pinterest where people have photographed their children's art and had them bound into coffee table books through photo printing shops like MPix or Snapfish. I've also seen a company that creates a stuffed animal out of a child's two-dimensional drawing. Pretty neat.

[Guest]

We give gifts on Chirstmas and birthday, but never bought toys in between. We limited toys to few quality toys (lots of playmobil) on which we splurged, and no cheap plastic clutter.

 

This is what I do, too, but it still adds up over time. I almost never buy toys during the regular year. I detest cheap plastic clutter, but I still wind up with some from things like birthday parties or church prizes.

 

Our kids get a few gifts from one set of grandparents and from my sister. We do not exchange gifts with the extended family.

What kind of hand made thinsg does your mother give? Can you store them in a special box, or are they clothes? Give me an idea.

 

It's not usually clothes. She has made sleeping bags, pillows, stuffed animals, growth charts and all manner of things. I have a giant rubbermade tub in the basement with fabric letter pillows - and not just 26 of them. She made duplicates of some letters so we would be able to spell with them. This is really quite a remarkable gift, but now there's not much I can do with it except keep it in that tote in the basement. It's a shame, really.

 

 

Allocate a certain space to storage of arts and crafts project- a shelf, a box, a cupboard. When it is filled, they must go through and purge. They may keep a certain amount of stuff each year. I have one flat document storage box (pizza box size) per child per year for long term keeping of schoolwork, creative writing, art, performance programs etc.

I suggest you take pictures of each larger piece of artwork, store them digitally, and toss the original.

 

This is good. I can do this.

[regentrude]

I have a giant rubbermade tub in the basement with fabric letter pillows - and not just 26 of them. She made duplicates of some letters so we would be able to spell with them. This is really quite a remarkable gift, but now there's not much I can do with it except keep it in that tote in the basement. It's a shame, really.

 

 

Can't you pass it on to a special friend who can appreciate the gift and use it for spelling with her kids?

 

My mom knits, but is very adamant that I do not need to save every kintted item she gave me. In fact, she is horrified that I have been keeping a 30 year old sweaters just because she made it.

[Guest]

Can't you pass it on to a special friend who can appreciate the gift and use it for spelling with her kids?

 

My mom knits, but is very adamant that I do not need to save every kintted item she gave me. In fact, she is horrified that I have been keeping a 30 year old sweaters just because she made it.

 

With that particular gift, I just don't think I can pass that on to anyone else. I don't have any good friends who would need or want it and I'm definitely not giving it to someone who doesn't particularly care. If I absolutely had to unload the pillows because we were moving overseas or something similar, maybe I could, but living in a large house as I do, there is a view of, "Well, it's not like you really don't have the room..." My mom is highly, highly sentimental; way more than I am. Even if I was more indifferent about keeping the pillows, I really do think she would be very hurt if I passed them on. She is not like your mom with her knitting. :tongue_smilie: My mom still has a painting hanging on her wall that I made in 10th grade! :tongue_smilie:

[Soror]

Okay, here's another question for people who do well with managing kids' stuff/clutter: What do you do about gifts and gift-giving occasions? I feel like I am on the conservative side when Christmas rolls around, but I do still want them to have a nice pile of things they will be very happy about receiving. (Granted, this is not as much of an issue as they get older and don't want toys so much as ipods and things.) Aside from what we give them for Christmas, there's all the stuff that comes from Grammy or other well-meaning folks. My mom often gives them hand-made things and those are almost impossible to ever purge. I am well aware that my mother will not be here forever and pitching out those things seems like the worse of stone-heartedness.

Very thankfully I've gotten the grandparents to mostly stick to lists we make. We try to keep it to few things that are nicer. We don't get a lot of gifts from other people and honestly I try to avoid those kind of things as I feel it a waste. I've always considered the 4 gift rule but have never implemented that exactly. I do like to do a book/book set, toy, clothing, and something useful. I also usually purge toys a few times a year to take care of any build up due to gifts. The kids know that there are (1)limited bins to keep toys- whatever doesn't fit isn't kept and (2) if they cannot keep their room clean then something has to go. So, at times they have more things then I would like but as long as it stays neat and organized it is ok with me.

 

And then there are the art and craft projects they made. :001_unsure: I have an interesting sculpture in my living room that has been there for a year. That has been okay; I'm not aiming for all Martha Stewart, all the time. But I'm over it. I don't know whether to appeal to reason with the artist, sneak it away and see if it is noticed or just go for dumpster and figure if it ever come up, he'll get over it. This is when I envy my military friends who always have the handy excuse..."Well, we're moving to Japan and we can only bring the things we absolutely cannot live without..."

I keep art projects out for a while and then get thrown away. I do let dd pick at times what she wants to keep out. I'm a horrible mom though and I don't generally feel terribly sentimental about such things. Dd is constantly drawing and such I'd drown if I kept everything.

[pfamilygal]

This lady is amazing:

 

http://www.largefamiliesonpurpose.com/2011/04/de-cluttering-first-steps-to.html

 

This one doesn't have many pics, but is still good:

 

http://www.largefamilysmallworld.com/2012/03/toys-who-what-when-where-and-why.html

[CyndiLJ]

What an interesting thread! I have been considering getting rid of all the things we don't need around here for a very long time, and seeing the benefits of some of our work already (though not nearly where we need to be). Looking at our kids rooms, we all talk about how little there is actually used and why are we saving it all.

 

I need to go read some blogs for a few days for inspiration and motivation to actually get rid of things...I think our life would be MUCH simpler and happier with only a tub of Legos and a few clothes in the boys' room, they play more imaginary games than anything else anyway.

 

Cindy

[I.Dup.]

In this sense, a large family may actually have it easier to be minimalist than a small one - clothing and toys are passed on to siblings and used up.

 

I do think this is true. We use things until they WEAR OUT whereas many small families I know hardly get any wear out of their children's current clothes before they are on to the next trend.

 

This lady is amazing:

 

http://www.largefamiliesonpurpose.com/2011/04/de-cluttering-first-steps-to.html

 

 

I love this blog!!! Thanks for sharing, I had lost touch with that one for awhile, excited to add it to my feed and catch up :001_smile:

 

We are minimalist in certain things, esp. when I compare myself with friends and family. We have one cutting board and 2 pots. We have 2 cookie sheets. 1 muffin tin. Our utensil drawer is only half full. And we get by just fine. I do need more kitchen towels. We have about 8 bath towels, I guess that translates to one for each of us but we usually use them for 2-3 showers each. I think moving just about yearly for the past 10 years (we've moved 13 times!) has helped with this. We are constantly having to go through all of our belongings as we pack and unpack, etc.

 

I do have a struggle with the clothing issue. I'd be curious to hear about this from other large family moms. For us it's so easy to move clothes from one boy to the next because they are so close in age, but the seasonal storing and unpacking again gets wearisome. I'm curious how much I really end up saving by not buying a whole new wardrobe each season. Probably a lot, but in many ways that would make life SO much easier.

[regentrude]

We have one cutting board and 2 pots.

 

Does that mean you never cook anything involving more than one main dish and one side?

 

(I get the cookie sheet./muffin tin part, but I would find two pots severely limiting. I have four, and I am having trouble with bigger meals - emptying the pot into a bowl and washing it so I can reuse it for another dish in the middle of cooking makes things more complicated.)

Edited September 17, 2012 by regentrude

[I.Dup.]

Does that mean you never cook anything involving more than one main dish and one side?

 

 

Yes. We usually have meat and one side, last night we had 2 sides- french fries in the oven and corn on the cob in one of the pots. But we have a ton of food allergies so that makes our meals more simple by necessity.

 

We do have one smaller pot that we can use for boiling eggs, etc. But we only have 2 large pots.

[2squared]

Does that mean you never cook anything involving more than one main dish and one side?

 

(I get the cookie sheet./muffin tin part, but I would find two pots severely limiting. I have four, and I am having trouble with bigger meals.)

 

I have two pots, but I rarely use both at the same time. I use my one large skillet, one medium sized pot, and one 9x13 glass pan. If I need to use the skillet for multiple items, then I just cook the first, set it aside, and cook the next thing.

 

I have to wonder what your meals look like compared to mine. My meals are rather basic - meats, veggies, and bread/pasta/rice. The veggies are often served raw or as a salad.

[I.Dup.]

I have two pots, but I rarely use both at the same time. I use my one large skillet, one medium sized pot, and one 9x13 glass pan. If I need to use the skillet for multiple items, then I just cook the first, set it aside, and cook the next thing.

 

I have to wonder what your meals look like compared to mine. My meals are rather basic - meats, veggies, and bread/pasta/rice.

 

:iagree:

[Soror]

I do have a struggle with the clothing issue. I'd be curious to hear about this from other large family moms. For us it's so easy to move clothes from one boy to the next because they are so close in age, but the seasonal storing and unpacking again gets wearisome. I'm curious how much I really end up saving by not buying a whole new wardrobe each season. Probably a lot, but in many ways that would make life SO much easier.

 

I'm going through clothing today. I hate storing clothes. I've been keeping less and less and I'm not keeping anything not in good shape. My kids are so hard on clothes it ends up not being a lot. I am still able to find quite a lot for the girls and get hand-me downs as well, so it doesn't seem worth it to me to store so much.

[2squared]

I do have a struggle with the clothing issue. I'd be curious to hear about this from other large family moms. For us it's so easy to move clothes from one boy to the next because they are so close in age, but the seasonal storing and unpacking again gets wearisome. I'm curious how much I really end up saving by not buying a whole new wardrobe each season. Probably a lot, but in many ways that would make life SO much easier.

 

My boys have 5 outfits/person. They are worn out by the end of the season so the clothes are tossed rather than stored. Their pants always have holes in the knees, so I cut them off and they wear those as summer play shorts. After summer is over, the ragged things are tossed.

[I.Dup.]

My boys have 5 outfits/person. They are worn out by the end of the season so the clothes are tossed rather than stored. Their pants always have holes in the knees, so I cut them off and they wear those as summer play shorts. After summer is over, the ragged things are tossed.

 

I like this idea.

[regentrude]

You mentioned having a skillet and glass pan- I was literally thinking of two pots as the only means of cooking food. Certainly, with skillets and ovenware, two pots can go a long way.

 

I have to wonder what your meals look like compared to mine. My meals are rather basic - meats, veggies, and bread/pasta/rice. The veggies are often served raw or as a salad.

 

For weekday meals, that's what I do, too - but I love to entertain, and to cook more elaborate meals on weekends. A dinner with company in fall/winter would start with a soup - there goes the big pot. The main dish would have at least two sides, a starch and a vegetable, but often several vegetables. Sometimes meat/fish can be done in the oven or in a pan, but sometimes I need a pot for that as well.

Desert prep might require the use of yet another pot - not the biggest problem since I usually can prepare that in advance and wash the pot.

 

This weekend, we had a roast (oven pan), rice (pot), sweet potatoes (pot, then oven ware), cauliflower (pot), and a sauce (pot ).

 

But come Christmas or Thanksgiving, oh my... (and we don't even have company for those, it's just the four of us. I guess I make elaborate holiday dinners to compensate for being homesick since I have no extended family in the country and we are always just by ourselves.) I guess I am not cut out to be a cooking minimalist.

Edited September 17, 2012 by regentrude

[mommaduck]

We have one cutting board and 2 pots.

http://www.perpetualkid.com/the-ocd-chef-cutting-board.aspx The ultimate OCD cutting board :D A good friend of mine has this ;)

[I.Dup.]

http://www.perpetualkid.com/the-ocd-chef-cutting-board.aspx The ultimate OCD cutting board :D A good friend of mine has this ;)

 

I love it! My husband is the foodie in our family, so I am going to share this with him on fb. He will definitely want it!!

[mommaduck]

I love it! My husband is the foodie in our family, so I am going to share this with him on fb. He will definitely want it!!

My friend is a foodie also. She used to do restaurant reviews for a paper and she learned so much from chefs here in the DC area. It's fun watching her prep for cooking. I've learned much from her.