Big Family/Small House...how's it work?

[Melodiya99]

We're thinking of downsizing to a house half the size of our current (1200 sq ft) and getting 4 more kids (total of 6 kids). Part of me is excited about being in closer quarters, and part of me is scared that I won't have anywhere to put clothes, homeschooling stuff, toys, etc. and the place will be a complete disaster. I am trying to purge even now, but it's just completely uncharted territory for me, so it's hard to know if I'm imagining the worst or imagining the best. Would you do it? How do you make it work?

 

Thanks:)

[Audrey]

We're thinking of downsizing to a house half the size of our current (1200 sq ft) and getting 4 more kids (total of 6 kids). Part of me is excited about being in closer quarters, and part of me is scared that I won't have anywhere to put clothes, homeschooling stuff, toys, etc. and the place will be a complete disaster. I am trying to purge even now, but it's just completely uncharted territory for me, so it's hard to know if I'm imagining the worst or imagining the best. Would you do it? How do you make it work?

 

Thanks:)

 

 

Well, my house is about 1500 sq feet and at one point there were 2 adults and 14 kids living in it. Everyone lived just fine. No deaths from overcrowding. That's 93.75 sq ft per person. Your ratio will be 150 sq ft per person. It'll be like living in a palace, comparatively speaking.

[Unicorn.]

Would I do it? No way! There are 5 of us in just about 1500 sq. feet. There is no place to go when one needs quiet. There is no privacy, no space, no peace and quiet.

[wapiti]

"Get" as in foster?

 

I have six kids. No, I would not move to a 1200 sq ft house.

 

Eta, some houses have more efficiently-organized space than other houses, so a more accurate answer might depend on how many rooms/bedrooms were available. Still, I would not, on purpose, downsize knowing that I was taking on so many kids.

Edited September 13, 2012 by wapiti

[Annie Laurie]

I lived in a 1200 sq ft house before this one, with 6 people, and I thought I was going to go crazy.

[sbgrace]

I do think it matters how the home is laid out and what type of storage it contains.

 

We moved from 1650 to 900 (right now) and I'm struggling with just four of us. By struggling I mean it feels stuffed and cluttered to me in a way my home before didn't. On the other hand we had to redo the entire kitchen. It's an absolutely tiny kitchen compared to what I left but we selected great cabinets and so it is actually better for storage than my old kitchen despite far fewer cabinets and much less space in all ways.

 

This home has far less storage space (less and smaller closets, no pantry, no garage, and on). So it's really not the square feet that is my issue I don't think. That said, my son said this week he wishes he had "room" to get away from his twin sometimes. We just don't have that here like we did in the previous home. Similarly, I've really got no comfortable place to go in the house for time away from everyone either. That probably bothers an introvert more than it would some others! Things like a train set or blocks are right in the walking space as there is no other place to play. And one child doesn't have room for blocks if his brother is playing with trains or similar. I've also noticed sound from the main living area travels easily to the bedrooms given they are so close. I didn't have that issue in my other home either.

 

Adding four new kids while also moving would be pretty stressful I'd think. Can you do one and then the other perhaps?

Edited September 13, 2012 by sbgrace

[mom2abcd]

Don't do it. VERY hard...

[cornelia9805]

I would not choose to do that. We lived in a 1200sq ft condo with 3 kids and like others have said, there was no where for anyone to escape. I homeschooled for a year there and there was no space for a separate area. Just thinking about how cramped and cluttered the place was makes my chest tighten. I hope you can find something that will work for your family.

[RoughCollie]

Well, my house is about 1500 sq feet and at one point there were 2 adults and 14 kids living in it. Everyone lived just fine.

 

Wow! How many bathrooms do you have?

[Renee in NC]

We lived in 1200 square feet for a year with 2-3 adults and 6 kids. It really wasn't that bad. The biggest thing is to have space outside.

 

We are in 1500 square feet now (and the other adult is here less often.) The only thing I wish I had was another bedroom, even if it made the others smaller.

 

ETA: Our 1200 sf was not cramped, cluttered, etc. We don't have as much "stuff," and that helps quite a bit. I see immigrant families living 2-3 families to a home, and it helps them to get ahead (by saving money on rent, they can buy a business faster.)

Edited September 13, 2012 by Renee in FL

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[Carrie12345]

I would definitely not.

 

We are going through a major purge right now to help with "stuff", but the troubles (for me) go way beyond that.

 

1.) The noise. You can pretty much hear everything from any room in the (1100sf) house.

 

2.) There is no private space. My 5yo has been known to lock himself in the bathroom for the chance to decompress and be away from people for a few minutes. That makes me sad. Which leads me to

 

3.) Bathrooms. We do okay with just 2 bathrooms... until someone gets sick. And when several of us get sick, it's even worse.

 

4.) As pushed together as we are, it's difficult to DO things together in tight quarters. My 4 oldest like to cook. Trying to work with just TWO people inour kitchen is difficult. Watching a documentary witholder kids while youngers play with action figures is difficult. Trying to take a phone call with relative quiet is difficult. Trying to put some kids to bed while others are still up is difficult. Trying to play a board game or a floor game without affecting (or being affected by) other people's space usage is difficult.

 

5.) Outside space is important, but long winters make that difficult for us. Our dining room (slash entryway) spends the cold months covered in big coats, gloves, hats, scarves, and muddy boots. And the floor is covered in old towels to catch the constant snow and mud.

 

We've considered short-term fostering, but we don't even meet their standards for bedroom square footage for our birth kids.

[Carrie12345]

Adding... How old are your kids? We moved here when our older 3 were 7, 3, and 2. I never really thought through to the fact that they'd get BIGGER, let alone adding more. My dds' room fit two toddler beds real nicely. Now, even with bunks for their twin beds, the room is swallowed up.

 

Their bodies are bigger, their clothes are bigger, the food they eat takes more space... We're bursting at the seams.

[lynn]

I grew up in a small house in a family of 7. Mother kept our home clutter free. Everything had it's place. I think it would be harder to do today for kids have a lot more "stuff" than we ever had. If the lay out of the house was right and there was enough storage I imagine it can be done.

[Monica_in_Switzerland]

We have an 1100sf apartment. I could imagine having one more kid (4 kids total) in this space, but more than that seems like it would be too tight. Especially as the kids get older and might not appreciate one person peeing, one person brushing teeth, and one person showering all simultaneously in the bathroom, ha!

[Ottakee]

How old are your kids now? How old are the ones you might "get"? If this is through foster care/adoption you will need a certain amount of square footage in a bedroom PER child (including bios). Here it is 40sq. feet plus closet space.....so a 10x12 room could hold 3 children but not 4 legally.

 

Also, adding 4 kids to your family is a whole nother ball of wax than it is adding them one at a time through birth. There are a lot of various issues but sometimes there are reasons why 1 or more of the new ones would need their own bedroom.

 

Certianly a family of 8 can live in a smaller house BUT a family fostering/adopting 4 new kids might not be able to do it.

[2squared]

Don't do it!!!!

 

We are in a small house, and it is cramped. We all fight to get away from the noise and chaos. It's hard for the kids to have friends over b/c we are on top of each other. My daughters share a tiny bedroom, and two 10yos (dd + friend) have trouble fitting in there together.

 

We will probably convert part of our large garage into a kid hang-out type area.

[DawnM]

I would have no desire to do that.

[TravelingChris]

Wow, I couldn't do that. We were in a 900sq. ft. townhouse for a few months once with four people, and two were young children(6 and 2). The bedrooms were actually big but the living area was small. I couldn't imagine adding more kids to that situation. It was too small for us at that time, let alone with many more kids. I would have gone nuts.

[Wheres Toto]

I wouldn't do it voluntarily. We are in 750 square feet with 5 people. It only worked even half way decently when at least one of the kids was a baby since things were smaller and could be controlled more easily. We are just now getting things to a point where they work well. Part of that is we bought a new stacking washer and dryer which gave us more space in our laundry nook to store things, we put up a ton of shelves - basically everywhere we possibly could, and, probably the biggest help - my oldest is currently living in a college dorm. We still have a bed for her (a bunk bed in her sisters room) and a cabinet that holds her stuff, but being able to separate the two little guys into separate rooms is helping a lot. We also gained a bunch of drawer space and a whole closet.

 

Layout could make a difference. We have only 2 very small closets, no attic, no basement, detached garage (with chipmunk, spider and mice problems), but a decent outdoor space. Where I live we have weather so outside isn't as much of a help as you would think.

[blondeviolin]

We have four kids in ~1200 square feet. Our kids are young, but we're already cramped with not as much space as we'd like. We would sell and upgrade, but we have small kids and going through the hassle of showing a house with them makes me cringe. Plus we have maintenance to do before we put it on the market.

[thebarefootamazon]

Getting four children? As in fostering or adopting? Are you sure the new home would pass the space requirement laws for each child?

 

I only ask because we live in a 970sq ft house (upstairs, they don't include the partially finished basement) and with the 6 people in our family we cannot add more kids through foster or adoption because of the space requirements.

[saraha]

We are 2 adults and 6 kids in a 1200 sf house with one bathroom. It works just fine, but with a few differences.

1. Space outside to hang out. We have a nice deck and yard, so a lot of time is spent outside.

2. Bathroom time is scheduled. Potty has priority, so showers are usually taken at night (except for husband, who is up before everyone) so that the bathroom is available in the morning as kids get up.

3. My house isn't decorated, it is organized. I don't have pretty rooms, I have rooms that have efficient storage. Our endtables and furniture are in styles that offer storage.

4. Every kid owns just over the bare minimum for clothing and toys are community property. Each kid has a shelf hanging on the wall of their room that is THEIRS. They put things on there they don't want to share, and no one is allowed to touch it.

5. My bedroom is off limits. It is not pretty either, it has lots of things stored there. Kids who need a quiet time can go in my room, with my permission. So they have to ask to be in there, and only one kid at a time.

6. We have 4 girls sharing one room and 2 boys sharing another. Room clean up is everyone's responsibility, but every morning when they get up, they have to get dressed, tidy their beds, and pick up 10 things. (Laundry on the floor, books, toys, crayons, whatever) It helps keep the room better, but not always clean. On clean up days, each girl is assigned jobs to do in the room.

My biggest thing though was getting past the idea that the house will look like a magazine, when in reality there is a big blue plastic bucket for toddler toys in the living room, bookshelves in every available space, open shelves in the kitchen to serve as a pantry, etc. It doesn't look pretty, or decorated, just clean and organized.

[lea_lpz]

We have an 1100sf apartment. I could imagine having one more kid (4 kids total) in this space, but more than that seems like it would be too tight. Especially as the kids get older and might not appreciate one person peeing, one person brushing teeth, and one person showering all simultaneously in the bathroom, ha!

 

:iagree:

 

We have the same size living quarters with 3 kids it's very tight on space. And only 1 1/2 baths. We have to be creative with space and still have clutter (mostly dh's:angry:). I could see us possibly having one more (2 to a room) but more than that would be hard! Family living space is the hardest. My kitchen, family room and full bath are pretty cramped, but you get creative!

 

We've debated moving but would need to pay more money for a bigger place. Our apartment is small, but very affordable, and only dh is working. Plus, ugh, just the work involved with moving...

[AdventureMoms]

I would not personally choose to move a family of 4 from 2400sqft to 1200sqft, then add 4 more people (who, if you are doing foster/adoption are more likely to need more space, both legally and psychologically). I'm sure it's possible, but I think it would be very hard and not something I'd choose to do.

 

I have 3 children and 2 adults in 1100sqft. 3 bedrooms, 1 bath. It is a fine size for us, It would be an ok size with perhaps one more child, but 3 more children would overwhelm the house. I'm assuming a 1200sqft house that you would consider for a family of 8 would be a 3bedroom (I can't imagine how 4 bedrooms would fit). That means you'll need at least 3 children per room, possibly 4 in one/2in the other. Bedrooms in a house that size are likely quite small, so logistically, that could be a challenge by itself. If you're planning to add foster children, I know some states will not allow bunkbeds (and I don't think any will allow bed sharing) for foster children. I'm not sure about adoption. Fitting 3 or 4 twin beds in a bedroom that is 10x11 (the size of our bigger bedrooms) is going to be very challenging. And you haven't even started adding clothes, shoes, toys, books, coats, homeschool materials...

 

I find our living areas (kitchen+dining+living are all together about 500sqft) to be small if we have any guests at all. It is hard to cook in the kitchen with more than one helper (and my kitchen is decent sized, relatively), which can get frustrating if you want to cook with your kids. If we have two or three other children over here the mayhem in the living/dining room gets completely overwhelming. All playing has to happen in there, because there's no room in the bedrooms. That also means there's no room for kids to play apart from each other. So if DD wants to work on her beads while her brothers are playing with their toys, she has to do it in the kitchen. Which means I have to work around a 4yo on the kitchen floor playing with beads.

 

It would be easier if you had a good yard and a climate that allowed a lot of year-round outdoor time. Also it would help if you lived in a climate that doesn't require winter clothing. Right now the clothing is totally overwhelming us because I have winter stuff out (it's getting chilly some days) but still need summer stuff out (it will be 80 today) so that means twice as many clothes per child. Once we have winter boots, coats, snowpants, long underwear, extra socks, mittens, hats, and scarves to juggle, things get a little crazy.

[AndrewsDK]

I think 6-8 people *can* live together in 1200 sq. feet. But, I wouldn't do it if you are planning on adopting/fostering that many kids.

 

We do foster care and the kids are just different. You often often often can not have them sleeping in the same room with other kids. Or, you simply need space for kids to get away from each other during the day.

 

After they are all adopted and adjusted, you could downsize, but I wouldn't do it before you adopt.

 

Also, in our state, you are required to have 50 sq. feet of bedroom space per kid.

 

Now, if you are going to be watching your best friends kids, or your nieces/nephews, kids you have known since forever, then it might work. I would strongly advise against it for foster/adopt kids.