POLL: WWYD?

[DawnM]

My boys worked about 30 hours EACH towards a fund raiser for scouts. The profits were split among those who worked and paid out in "scout bucks."

 

Scout bucks, if you aren't familiar with them, are $$ amounts to be used for scouting activities only, no cash given.

 

We are mostly doing this so that my oldest and my DH can go to Philmont next summer.

 

However, my younger two worked too and will get no benefit from it other than helping.

 

We have some $$, we are not hurting financially, but sending DH and oldest on this trip will set us back about $3,800 total, so we do need fundraisers.

[DawnM]

FWIW, I do plan to give them something, I just need to decide what is fair. I realize many families wouldn't offer anything and that is fine, I just do plan to do something.

 

What do you think is fair?

 

Dawn

[TXBeth]

I voted "other." I would say no compensation, but with the caveat that they knew going in that this is something they were doing for their brother and that it was optional,

[Dory]

If it was my younger two, I'd let them pick a small activity for us to go do together. Perhaps something like miniature golf and supper out, or a movie and supper. Something along those lines. Not big, but something fun to thank them for helping out with something.

[aggieamy]

If it was my younger two, I'd let them pick a small activity for us to go do together. Perhaps something like miniature golf and supper out, or a movie and supper. Something along those lines. Not big, but something fun to thank them for helping out with something.

 

:iagree:

 

Maybe something you can all do while DH and your older kids are away.

[Serenade]

Are all your boys full members of the Troop? And was the money credited to each of their scout accounts, or just to the account of the oldest? If they all worked equally and all were members of the Troop (as opposed to cub scouts helping out), I would let each boy keep his portion in his scout account. They will all want to go on a big trip someday, and why not let them start saving for it now? My oldest is saving for the Jamboree next year, so I know this stuff is expensive.

[Miss Marple]

Will the younger boys be going on a high adventure trip with scouts when their time comes? If so, I wouldn't worry about splitting the funds because they will eventually get similar treatment. I do think that doing something nice for them as recognition of their help is reasonable. I think it's good for kids to help other members of the family just because it's a family thing.

 

If this were my family, I would probably let the boys decide what kind of "reward" they wanted (within reason). I would guess mine would choose going out for pizza and a movie with a friend or a new pair of ear buds. If your sons have something they've been wanting for a while, it might be a good time to fulfill that desire. Ideally it would be nice if the recognition came from your dh and son since they are the recipients of the funds raised - might mean more to them. It all depends on your budget :)

[DawnM]

Ok, let me explain.

 

Yes, they can all have scout bucks in their individual accounts. HOWEVER, youngest won't use it for oh, about 3 more years minimum and by that time who knows where/what we will be doing. If he saves it for high adventure, he would have it in there for 5-6 years before using it.

 

Our plan is to still be here and still be part of this pack/trroop, but who knows.

 

Middle son will eventually go on a high adventure trip, but again, not for 3 more years (our troop does one every OTHER year and since the next one is in 2013 and middle son won't be old enough, his turn won't be until 2015.) Again, no idea where we will be at that time.

 

So, I have chosen to apply the full amount to THIS trip so that I won't lose it if we leave or if they decide not to do a high adventure trip.

 

Sure, I could use the amount for summer camp instead (although youngest still wouldn't get a benefit) but I need the money NOW as our first large payment for Philmont is due.

 

I have to say too that my youngest son is the BEST worker of the three! :D He is 8 and can outwork most of those big boys in scouts. He might not be able to lift the heavy things, but he is working 100% of the time and if he can't find something that needs doing, he asks the leader immediately. He says he loves working! I love that kid!

 

So, even though technically they *CAN* save their scout bucks, I do not plan to do that at this time. I would much rather give them a little something out of my own $$ to thank them.

 

Dawn

[marbel]

After reading your explanation ;), I voted for giving them a small amount of compensation. 5 - 6 years is a long time to leave the Scout bucks sitting there. I'd make sure the younger kids understand that if/when their time comes for Phil-Mont, they won't be hindered because they gave up these Scout bucks to their older bro.

[Candid]

Document the amount now and save it someplace you won't lose it.

 

In the future their brother owes them a similar amount of work or $$ for their trips.

[DawnM]

Maybe, but older boys will be in college when youngest is that age.

 

Document the amount now and save it someplace you won't lose it.

 

In the future their brother owes them a similar amount of work or $$ for their trips.

[elfgivas]

while dh and oldest are on the trip, perhaps you could do something extra special with the younger two? you could tell them that the work they did will go towards paying for that.

 

but in our house, we do an "all for one, one for all" kind of thing, so dc would be thanked profusely, and we'd move on.

 

or

 

if your kids do chores, maybe oldest ds could offer to do their chores for a period of time as a way of saying thank you to them.

 

altruism is a trait we work on, so i'd go with just moving on, but ???

 

not sure that helps much,

ann

[Princess Peach]

I would probably take them out for ice cream (their favorite) or similar treat, just me and them.

[Miss Marple]

One thing I've discovered as my boys have grown up is that it's almost impossible to be "fair". Each child has his own needs, desires, etc. and the funds/time spent will never be equal. It really comes into play when they start heading towards college. Some may get great scholarships and others may not; some may choose a local university, others might need to go out of state due to the degree choice. The needs of each change over time. In the end, I believe it all settles out :) I think members of a family should be there for one another because there will be a time when they each need something from the others. A spirit of willingness to help another is a blessing and, IMO, is what scouting is about :)

 

I've given up trying to be "fair".

 

ETA: Maybe your oldest could bring back something from Philmont for his younger brothers.

[SailorMom]

I don't know - I mean - as long as the older eventually helps them with something - I don't see a problem with anything other than some kind of treat for them for helping....

[Amy in NH]

Document the amount now and save it someplace you won't lose it.

 

In the future their brother owes them a similar amount of work or $$ for their trips.

 

:iagree: And take them out to do something fun while older brother is away at camp.

[In The Great White North]

I would use it all, now, because I have no confidence that the younger two would actually ever get to use it.

 

IME, that sort of "funny money" ends up getting forfeited more often than not. Use it or lose it!

 

Since I would probably be the one making up the difference for all the boys, I don't see it as unfair. (Maybe if each boy had to earn the entire trip on his own, but my dc have never had enough money making opportunities to do that.)

[AK_Mom4]

We've had similiar situations here where we needed to have the $$$ applied to the oldest scout's account. Heck, both my DDs have put in time helping their brothers fundraise and do other troop projects. It's part of the whole "family-supports-each-other" thing.

 

When siblings are particularily helpful, we pick a special event - movie, mini golf, etc for the siblings to enjoy. It might be something the whole family does together, but gets picked by the sibs. Not expensive, but something fun to acknowledge their hard work.

[katilac]

I would probably just do something fun with them, as others have suggested. Ice cream shop, lunch at their favorite restaurant, that type of thing.

 

 

DH and oldest son should most definitely do a thank-you directly from them, maybe a souvenir from the trip, and they might enjoy some public acknowledgement (like, when they are showing off pictures to family, make sure to say the brothers worked hard to send them).

[*Lulu*]

I would make sure they know that you are proud of them for helping, and that it is part of being family. I would also make sure they get to do something special at home when those they helped are gone on the big trip.

[amy g.]

No. Helping out is compensation enough.

[DawnM]

#3 is a cub scout. He has a scout bucks fund too.

 

Okay, I understand more now. Our boys' Scout accounts have money going in and out all the time (we have a saint of a treasurer), so I would have put #2's for his next camping trip. But, if oldest needs it now, then, that's what you do. I'm surprised that #3 could have a Scout account as he's not a member. I definitely think that #1 should bring home some pretty cool patches from Philmont for his brothers!

[Crimson Wife]

I would have all the Scout bucks go to the oldest for his trip, and then take the youngers out for pizza or something like that as a "thank you".

[DawnM]

Thank you all for your ideas. We are still mulling it over but are leaning towards allowing them each to pick out something, maybe a new ds game or something.

 

Dawn

[Catwoman]

Thank you all for your ideas. We are still mulling it over but are leaning towards allowing them each to pick out something, maybe a new ds game or something.

 

Dawn

 

I think that's a good idea. It's a great way to reward all of their hard work. :001_smile:

[nrg]

They could earn scout bucks in the form of a super fun activity while Dh and Ds are at Philmont--a trip to the climbing gym, an awesome overnight campout, a fishing trip, etc. I always did a junior form of scout camp for my younger boys when the older and Dad were away.

[nono]

 

 

I have to say too that my youngest son is the BEST worker of the three! :D He is 8 and can outwork most of those big boys in scouts. He might not be able to lift the heavy things, but he is working 100% of the time and if he can't find something that needs doing, he asks the leader immediately. He says he loves working! I love that kid!

 

 

 

So, you show him you love him by taking earnings from his hard work and giving it to another?

[DawnM]

That was simply uncalled for.

 

 

 

 

So, you show him you love him by taking earnings from his hard work and giving it to another?

[Rebel Yell]

AFter your explanation, I think it makes more sense. I would set a $ amount and ask how each boy wants to spend it.

 

After reading your explanation ;), I voted for giving them a small amount of compensation. 5 - 6 years is a long time to leave the Scout bucks sitting there. I'd make sure the younger kids understand that if/when their time comes for Phil-Mont, they won't be hindered because they gave up these Scout bucks to their older bro.

 

Makes sense to me. :iagree:

 

So, you show him you love him by taking earnings from his hard work and giving it to another?

 

I may not agree with the phrasing of this comment, but it does raise the question: Did the younger boys know ahead of time how their work would be credited? If they knew ahead that they were working to help raise funds for older brother and they agreed to it, then great! If they didn't not know or assumed they would get credit, then perhaps in the future make it clear in advance.

 

I think helping siblings fundraise is great- as long as all are agreeable and know the plan up front.

[nono]

That was simply uncalled for.

 

It wasn't written as anything judgemental or malicious. Just for you to think about when determining proper compensation. Which I thought was the point of your post.

 

I don't really care what you do but that additional information definitely stuck out to me. So I commented. [shrug]

 

Good luck deciding.

[DawnM]

Of course they knew. I didn't just tell them, "You get X" and then yank it away. They aren't expecting anything and were thrilled when I suggested they would get something for helping.

 

Dawn

 

AFter your explanation, I think it makes more sense. I would set a $ amount and ask how each boy wants to spend it.

 

 

 

Makes sense to me. :iagree:

 

 

 

I may not agree with the phrasing of this comment, but it does raise the question: Did the younger boys know ahead of time how their work would be credited? If they knew ahead that they were working to help raise funds for older brother and they agreed to it, then great! If they didn't not know or assumed they would get credit, then perhaps in the future make it clear in advance.

 

I think helping siblings fundraise is great- as long as all are agreeable and know the plan up front.

[MomatHWTK]

I would use it all, now, because I have no confidence that the younger two would actually ever get to use it.

 

IME, that sort of "funny money" ends up getting forfeited more often than not. Use it or lose it!

 

Since I would probably be the one making up the difference for all the boys, I don't see it as unfair. (Maybe if each boy had to earn the entire trip on his own, but my dc have never had enough money making opportunities to do that.)

:iagree:

[Trilliums]

I wouldn't buy them anything. DH would be more likely to do so though. I am trying for less stuff in our house.

 

I might take everyone out for ice cream or frozen yoghurt.

[Rosie_0801]

Maybe, but older boys will be in college when youngest is that age.

 

My aunts and uncles put money towards a trip I took in grade six and my mother told me I had to return the favour if anyone ever asked. They are all better off financially than our family was and have probably all forgotten, but twenty years later, I still know.

 

From my perspective, your older boys ought to bring home a souvenir for their younger brothers and feel it is their responsibility to return the favour when the time comes. They'll find a way to help if they want to.

 

Rosie

[DawnM]

It was judgemental and snarky.

 

Dawn

 

It wasn't written as anything judgemental or malicious. Just for you to think about when determining proper compensation. Which I thought was the point of your post.

 

I don't really care what you do but that additional information definitely stuck out to me. So I commented. [shrug]

 

Good luck deciding.

Edited September 15, 2012 by DawnM

[nono]

It was judgemental and snarky.

 

Dawn

 

Was not! :tongue_smilie: