Should I Quit or Stick It Out?

[Hunter's Moon]

I started a cashier job on the 27th of August. I hate it. I dread going in.

 

I constantly feel stupid and awkward. Some things have made me cry. I admit, I am sensitive but this isn't good for what little self-esteem I have either.

 

The owner of the store recently got into a yelling match with a customer. Yes, she was the one in the wrong, but you don't get into a yelling match with a customer in the middle of the store and call her dumb for not reading a label.

 

I feel like a failure for not wanting to stick it out. Most of my coworkers are nice and helpful but some hate younger people and show it by acting superior. If I leave, I feel like I'd be giving them a reason to hate younger people.

 

Ever since the yelling match with the customer, I've been considering leaving.

 

This is two days into my third full week though.

 

UGH.

[Scarlett]

Unless someone is being abusive to you I say stick it out. You will learn a lot from a job like that. It will help you overcome feeling out of your comfort zone.

 

I had a job when I was in high school working in the nursing home laundry room. Wow! It made me realize I did not want to do that long term.

 

:grouphug:

[Faithr]

I once lasted three weeks as a waitress. It turns out I am not cut out for that particular work! I was nervous taking orders, got things wrong, the kitchen staff got mad at me and I hated the nasty customers. I quit. I found a job working in an office where I did light typing, copying, filing and phone calls. I was much, much happier! If you absolutely need this job (and it can be hard to get a job these days) stick it out, but don't despair. There are other jobs out there that will suit you better and not eat away at your self esteem.

[Guest submarines]

:grouphug: Give it more time.

 

But if you quit, make it count. Don't just walk away. If you see your boss abusing a customer, speak up, step in for the customer, and then quit (if needed).

 

In my early twenties I quit two jobs when the boss was abusive to homeless people. I made a stink when I left. I told everyone why I was leaving and how unacceptable certain behavious were. I wrote letters to the newspapers. This way you can at least influence others and hopefully teach them not to be passive.

[angela in ohio]

Does the owner yell at employees? Do the coworkers do anything to you personally? If not, I'd say to stick it out. It's always difficult and awkward at the start of a new job, as there is a lot to learn. I would at least stay long enough to know whether it is right or not.

[labst60]

My parents always gave the advice:

 

Don't quit a job you don't like until you have another job lined up and ready to start.

 

Sorry your job stinks - I've been there at times for sure. With a limited work history, it's not going to look the best on your resume/work history to leave after 2-3 weeks.

 

But if you DO find another opportunity that looks much better - I would probably chance it and take it - but I wouldn't leave WITHOUT a job... and remember, life is tough and the grass isn't always greener.

 

It's tough being the new guy/gal - but it does get easier.

[Hunter's Moon]

Does the owner yell at employees? Do the coworkers do anything to you personally? If not, I'd say to stick it out. It's always difficult and awkward at the start of a new job, as there is a lot to learn. I would at least stay long enough to know whether it is right or not.

 

The owner doesn't yell at us, but he isn't all the nice. My first day on the job he didn't welcome me to the company or anything. He just said "we are big on carry-outs. If you don't carry a heavy item out of the store for a female, you'll get fired." I understand the policy and it is a good one, but to say that as the first thing? Also, if the female is young and doesn't want our help, we have to force it on them because we get in trouble otherwise.

 

Also, a manager stood there and watch me a make a huge mistake and at the end of the day came to me and said "if the owner was standing there, he would have fired you" and then she made me sign a paper stating I understood the policy. I understand I made a mistake, but to watch me do it and not step in put me off. I am new.

 

Another employee clearly said to me the first time I met her, I don't like people, especially new people. And acts superior to me and treats me like I'm stupid and not worth her time.

 

I'm just sick of crying over this and feeling depressed over it. Maybe I'm being too sensitive and the job would help me get tougher, but I have about 0 self-esteem. I don't know.

[Unicorn.]

I would give it more time. In another month, you might find that you actually like your job. I agree w/ a pp who said not to quit unless you have another job lined up.

[Scarlett]

The owner doesn't yell at us, but he isn't all the nice. My first day on the job he didn't welcome me to the company or anything. He just said "we are big on carry-outs. If you don't carry a heavy item out of the store for a female, you'll get fired." I understand the policy and it is a good one, but to say that as the first thing? Also, if the female is young and doesn't want our help, we have to force it on them because we get in trouble otherwise.

 

Also, a manager stood there and watch me a make a huge mistake and at the end of the day came to me and said "if the owner was standing there, he would have fired you" and then she made me sign a paper stating I understood the policy. I understand I made a mistake, but to watch me do it and not step in put me off. I am new.

 

Another employee clearly said to me the first time I met her, I don't like people, especially new people. And acts superior to me and treats me like I'm stupid and not worth her time.

 

I'm just sick of crying over this and feeling depressed over it. Maybe I'm being too sensitive and the job would help me get tougher, but I have about 0 self-esteem. I don't know.

 

:grouphug: It does sound very unpleasant. Look for another job. I would still hang on to this one until I found another.

 

They can't eat you. :)

 

And you can take courage in the fact that you CAN quit anytime you want. Sometimes knowing that option is there (to quit on the spot) gives you the strength to stick it out until you find something better. You won't always have the option to walk away....someday you will have bills to pay and other people depending on you...so don't stress over this too much. You will be ok.

[angela in ohio]

The owner doesn't yell at us, but he isn't all the nice. My first day on the job he didn't welcome me to the company or anything. He just said "we are big on carry-outs. If you don't carry a heavy item out of the store for a female, you'll get fired." I understand the policy and it is a good one, but to say that as the first thing? Also, if the female is young and doesn't want our help, we have to force it on them because we get in trouble otherwise.

 

Also, a manager stood there and watch me a make a huge mistake and at the end of the day came to me and said "if the owner was standing there, he would have fired you" and then she made me sign a paper stating I understood the policy. I understand I made a mistake, but to watch me do it and not step in put me off. I am new.

 

Another employee clearly said to me the first time I met her, I don't like people, especially new people. And acts superior to me and treats me like I'm stupid and not worth her time.

 

I'm just sick of crying over this and feeling depressed over it. Maybe I'm being too sensitive and the job would help me get tougher, but I have about 0 self-esteem. I don't know.

 

Did you make the mistake in front of a customer? It's actually kinder to wait until later to discuss it rather than call you out in front of someone. That wouldn't be a problem to me.

 

About the other employee... There are mean people everywhere. You are going to have trouble finding work at all if you won't work where there aren't odd or mean people. Just stay away from that employee.

 

Honestly, I think you are expecting too much. I've never worked somewhere where the owner welcomed me personally on my first day. :001_smile: Most places are "jump in, get busy, we have work to do."

[laundrycrisis]

I started a cashier job on the 27th of August. I hate it. I dread going in.

 

I constantly feel stupid and awkward. Some things have made me cry. I admit, I am sensitive but this isn't good for what little self-esteem I have either.

 

The owner of the store recently got into a yelling match with a customer. Yes, she was the one in the wrong, but you don't get into a yelling match with a customer in the middle of the store and call her dumb for not reading a label.

 

I feel like a failure for not wanting to stick it out. Most of my coworkers are nice and helpful but some hate younger people and show it by acting superior. If I leave, I feel like I'd be giving them a reason to hate younger people.

 

Ever since the yelling match with the customer, I've been considering leaving.

 

This is two days into my third full week though.

 

UGH.

 

If this is how the owner of the store behaves, I would not want to work for this person. Working in a store with great customer service, and where great customer service is a valued trait in an employee, is fun, and you can learn a lot about customer service and retail business by working in a store like that. This store sounds very negative. I would look for a similar job someplace else.

[gingersmom]

If this is how the owner of the store behaves, I would not want to work for this person. Working in a store with great customer service, and where great customer service is a valued trait in an employee, is fun, and you can learn a lot about customer service and retail business by working in a store like that. This store sounds very negative. I would look for a similar job someplace else.

 

:iagree:

 

I stuck it out at a job that clearly I should have left long before I did. I will never make that mistake again.

 

I would start looking for another job ASAP.

[maddykate]

I would totally quit and find a new job. There are lots of jobs like that for young people and you are training yourself right now for what you will and will not tolerate in your life. You are getting a bad feeling about this place and I would advise you to trust it.

 

If you were in a financial situation and you couldn't leave, that is one thing. But, right now, you don't need that type of stress in your life and you need to set yourself up for success. Allowing yourself to be in a oppressive environment does nothing but make you feel bad about yourself. I don't think anything you gain while staying is worth the stress. Those same skills can be learned in a different, friendlier environment.

[Little Nyssa]

I would quit as soon as I found another job. :grouphug:

[Wildcat]

Stephanie :grouphug:

 

I would line up a new job and give a two week notice. Be the good employee, even though you really just want to never go back.

 

I once worked for a place for a week when I realized how hostile the environment was and that it wasn't for me. At the end of that first week, I gave a two week notice. It shocked the manager, but it was the right thing to do. In my resignation, I just said that it wasn't the right place for me.

 

Also~~ do you handle money? If so, once you give notice, be SURE to not let anyone work your register. My very.last.day I had to use the restroom and the one girl who had been nice to me offered to cover for me (usual behavior for that place), so I let her. My register was short $20 that day. Until that point, I had balanced to the penny each and every day. So... once you give notice, watch your back.

[lailasmum]

I personally would make moves to quit in the next few weeks. If you can find something else before you leave then that's good, but if you can't then I wouldn't worry at this point in your life. I really don't think it will have any long term repurcussions on your job prospects. I think leaving because it is a nasty environment is acceptable and I wouldn't worry about making that reason known if they ask. It is their problem not yours. It's also important to set the standard for what you will put up, especially if you have self esteem problems, people just drag you further into unhappiness otherwise.

 

I worked in a lot of shops off an on up until I was in my mid 20s and all except one seemed to have major issues with the environment and employees being taken advantage of. I think it's often because it's basically minimally skilled work and low paid and they don't think you have any other options. Even the shop run by a long term friend of mine had similar issues. I always got into trouble a lot there because the manager was a good friend up to that point and I would question the more ridiculous things people were supposed to put up with.

[elfgivas]

:grouphug: i wish it were different. :grouphug:

 

we have "rules we live by" so that we don't do things in the heat of the moment. one of those is "thou shalt not quit a job unless you have another one ready to go".

 

in this economy, most employers have a choice of who to hire. if i were an employer, i would be less likely to hire someone who only worked at their previous job for three weeks.

 

if you start looking now, maybe you'll find something quite quickly. if not, perhaps give yourself three months. that would be the beginning of november, and many places are making "Christmas hires" to handle their extra business. then you can apply for some of those, hopefully get one, and resign.

 

my first month in retail was many, many years ago, and i hated it. i was having to learn so much that was new, and the employees weren't very nice, and my supervisor made fun of me and was sarcastic in front of customers. it was, quite frankly, dreadful. i decided i couldn't quit, as there were no other jobs available. i lasted three months, and then resigned around the manager's ethics issues. by then, i had found another job. but it was a close thing.... a very close thing. i was living away from home, so needed the money desperately. if i hadn't, i am sure i would have just walked away. thirty years later, i'm glad i didn't.

 

:grouphug:

ann

[katilac]

Well, partially it depends - do you need the job? Can you get another one? If you need the job and don't have another one, then you tough it out.

 

A lot of these problems are going to follow you, unless you really luck out and find a great place to work with a good boss. I do think part of it is that you need to develop a thicker skin, and worry less about other people. Lots of jobs stink, that's all there is to it - especially entry level stuff. I have had plenty of jobs where I would have been delighted if the boss was yelling at OTHER people, lol, and where the owner just wasn't "all that nice."

 

There are benefits to sticking with it (above and beyond the paycheck). One is that it gets easier as you go along, and soon you won't be as worried all the time about making a mistake. Realizing that you CAN handle something, even if you don't like it, is one of the best self-esteem boosts that exists.

 

You can do this. Think of what you would tell your kids in a similar situation: that other people's opinions don't matter that much, right? And that you should give it a fair chance, and so on. Edited to add that I just realized you don't have kids, lol, but think of what you WOULD tell them. My advice stands, though: Consider how badly you need the job, and keep in mind that many of these problems are likely to exist at the next job. Is this your first job? If so, then it's that much harder; it really does get easier.

 

Good luck!

Edited September 11, 2012 by katilac

[Annie G]

I agree with the others who said to find another job before you quit this one. Finding another one first is crucial- you don't want to miss out getting a great job because they think you might just quit without notice.

 

Giving notice even after you find another job is a good idea. One day you might have people working for you- and you'll appreciate that notice. And even if you don't, when people quit without notice, it usually leaves the other workers to pick up the slack until a new person is hired.

 

But you really might find that once you get acclimated to this job, you'll like it. So...start looking for a new job but don't give up on this one yet.

[Princess Peach]

You will always find there are people you don't get along with or who rub you the wrong way when you're working with other people. <gently> I'm not sure the grass would be greener anywhere else. It may be that you need to develop a bit of a thicker skin.

 

OTOH, I am concerned that you sound depressed and feel that there may be some underlying issues here. Can you talk to your parents about how you're feeling?

[*********]

Stephanie, every single job I've ever had, I wanted to quit for the first few weeks.

 

It's just the 'everything is so new, so much to learn, I don't know anyone' jitters.

 

Give it some time. If it's still awful after two months, re-evaluate then. :grouphug:

[Aggie]

Maybe I'm being too sensitive and the job would help me get tougher, but I have about 0 self-esteem. I don't know.

 

Self-esteem isn't handed out or given away. Self-esteem comes from doing something productive and helping people.

 

You may not have confidence, either, but that doesn't come from sitting home. ;) It comes from doing different things, meeting people, even failing at times. Every one on this board has failed at something at some point. It's not pleasant, but we do grow from those incidents.

 

Do NOT let your perception of your 'self-esteem' determine what you do in life. Go DO and self-esteem and confidence will follow.

 

I can't think of any job that is completely stress-free. When you work for someone, or a company, your boss has to think of the good of the entire company and all the employees. That is stressful for your boss or the owner, trust me. Even in a place where all the employees are friendly and sweet, there will still be stress.

 

My advice is to go back to work, make a difference in that company, be nice to other employees and customers. Do what is right even when it is hard. in 10 years, this job will be a blip in your past. Right now, though, you will grow from this experience.

 

I would totally quit and find a new job. There are lots of jobs like that for young people and you are training yourself right now for what you will and will not tolerate in your life. You are getting a bad feeling about this place and I would advise you to trust it.

 

If you were in a financial situation and you couldn't leave, that is one thing. But, right now, you don't need that type of stress in your life and you need to set yourself up for success. Allowing yourself to be in a oppressive environment does nothing but make you feel bad about yourself. I don't think anything you gain while staying is worth the stress. Those same skills can be learned in a different, friendlier environment.

 

Not in our area! Even the worst fast food places aren't hiring now. My dd has been looking for a job for 9 months. :(

 

This isn't an oppressive environment, from what she's described, imo. Because *I* don't feel comfortable and stress free doesn't mean it's entirely the environment, ya know? ;) I think she can rise above the obstacles in this instance and learn quite a bit about working.

[Scarlett]

:grouphug: i wish it were different. :grouphug:

 

we have "rules we live by" so that we don't do things in the heat of the moment. one of those is "thou shalt not quit a job unless you have another one ready to go".

ann

 

:iagree: