Guest froggy0521 Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Hello everyone! This is my first year homeschooling. I have two boys, 10 and 8. We started 3 weeks ago and right now, I am hating it. I feel like every pary of who I was before homeschooling has been squashed. I was the PTO parent, volunteer, snack making mom who ran a non-profit organization and worked part time. Now, everything that was enjoyable to me is gone. We chose to homeschool because we felt our youngest, who is gifted, needed to be challenged and our oldest simply had some rough classmates. So, we thought we would try homeschooling. Now, I feel like a complete failure. Everyone here in the forum loves it and finds it to be wonderful. However, here I am trying desperately not to fall into a deep emotional abyss. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess Peach Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Hello everyone! This is my first year homeschooling. I have two boys, 10 and 8. We started 3 weeks ago and right now, I am hating it. I feel like every pary of who I was before homeschooling has been squashed. I was the PTO parent, volunteer, snack making mom who ran a non-profit organization and worked part time. Now, everything that was enjoyable to me is gone. We chose to homeschool because we felt our youngest, who is gifted, needed to be challenged and our oldest simply had some rough classmates. So, we thought we would try homeschooling. Now, I feel like a complete failure. Everyone here in the forum loves it and finds it to be wonderful. However, here I am trying desperately not to fall into a deep emotional abyss. :( Hang out here a while and you'll find the bolded to be untrue. :) Homeschooling was the hardest thing I ever did. I didn't always love it or find it wonderful, trust me. Hopefully you'll get some great advice here. Hang in there. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Hello everyone! This is my first year homeschooling. I have two boys, 10 and 8. We started 3 weeks ago and right now, I am hating it. I feel like every pary of who I was before homeschooling has been squashed. I was the PTO parent, volunteer, snack making mom who ran a non-profit organization and worked part time. Now, everything that was enjoyable to me is gone. We chose to homeschool because we felt our youngest, who is gifted, needed to be challenged and our oldest simply had some rough classmates. So, we thought we would try homeschooling. Now, I feel like a complete failure. Everyone here in the forum loves it and finds it to be wonderful. However, here I am trying desperately not to fall into a deep emotional abyss. :( This is NORMAL. You will have days where you feel like this. You will have other days where the kids sparkle with joy and love every minute of it (trust me...it will come). You are NOT a failure. You will get to do some of those other things again as your days normalize. This is a VERY short season. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freeindeed Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 :grouphug:We all have our hard days, trust me. Make sure to carve out some time for yourself to just be "you." Take your kids on some fun field trips, do some crafts together, or bake together...take a day off for fun.:) Hang in there, you'll find your groove. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaxMom Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Hang out here a while and you'll find the bolded to be untrue. :) Homeschooling was the hardest thing I ever did. I didn't always love it or find it wonderful, trust me. Hopefully you'll get some great advice here. Hang in there. :grouphug: This is NORMAL. You will have days where you feel like this. You will have other days where the kids sparkle with joy and love every minute of it (trust me...it will come). You are NOT a failure. You will get to do some of those other things again as your days normalize. This is a VERY short season. Yep. After 8 years (?!?!?) I still have those days where, as a friend so eloquently put it recently, "I feel like eating my young". Add into that the adjustment in defining your dual role as mom and teacher, and redefining who you are... Yeah, you're in a difficult, untethered, place. When you find your stride, it will be better, though there are always "those days". ;) Welcome to the boards! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IsabelC Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Sounds like you are having a perfectly natural grief reaction to losing your previous life, as well as losing your dream of a perfectly rosy homeschool. :grouphug: First, let me assure you that very few of us - if any - find it amazingly fulfilling 100% of the time. There are always those days when we feel like packing them off to school and taking a well-earned break! Not enjoying every minute certainly does not make you a failure. Homeschooling isn't for everyone, so it may well not be for you and your family. But I'd encourage you to make some adjustments and give it a longer trial before you make up you mind. You need to find some way of incorporating "you-time" into your life. If you give up everything apart from homeschooling, you're going burn out. Is there some way you can fit a little bit of what you enjoy in? Also, look carefully at what you're doing with your sons, to make sure you're not doing too much. With an 8yo and a 10yo, you should be able to carve out space for some of your own pursuits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blessed3x Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 :grouphug:We all have our hard days, trust me. Make sure to carve out some time for yourself to just be "you." Take your kids on some fun field trips, do some crafts together, or bake together...take a day off for fun.:) Hang in there, you'll find your groove. :iagree: This is a huge life adjustment for you and your kids. Take deep breaths, let there be bad days and know that it will pass. Stay positive and find the good that you are have done- focus there.:) Baking cookies or taking a field trip is excellent advice. Not all learning comes from the books. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Are you finding any time around adults? It sounds like you really thrived on the recognition from other adults (teachers/parents/clients) and are no longer getting that. I think the hardest part of homeschooling is that the little brats..oops...I mean angels...don't appreciate all the hard work you are putting into it. You slave over lessons and such and they just Do.NOT.Care. that is really hard on one's self esteem. Have you joined any local groups? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amo_mea_filiis. Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 I dont think we all love every moment of it. Go look at my sn's cycle post. Right now, everything involving my ds just flat out sucks. But i also know that if i stick him on that van to go to school, i lose every possible chance of getting the positive moments with him. Have you guys taken a break yet? Not a summer break, but just relax and ease into it break? All during last year (first year) i thought i was failing and that it was the worst choice. But when i put together ds's portfolio to turn in for the year, i realized we had a great year. If he were in public school, he never would have had physical therapy that allowed him to now ride a bike. He would not have had occupational therapy and almost be tying shoes. I would not have learned that he cant have food coloring or that he needs to eat protein very often. If dd had been in regular public school (we used cyber last year), we would not have learned how to crochet together with a bunch of lovely ladies at the library during school hours. It may not be for your family, but give it some time first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hillfarm Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 If you miss the opportunity to be involved in your children's lives by volunteering with organizations that affect them, there are plenty of opportunities to do so as a homeschool parent. Scouts, 4-H, sports teams, library programs, co-op programs, church youth opportunities, museum programs, etc... The list goes on and on. There are numerous opportunities and most of these are wide open and desperately need volunteers since many parents are so involved with school needs that they don't have enough time to also help all these other organization. I have been a 4-H advisor for going on 9 years. It has been a very good experience for my whole family. Don't let the shock from your first few weeks as a homeschool family overwhelm you. School will smooth out in time and you will find your own rhythm. Family relationships will stabilize and often become stronger. Be picky when you do begin to volunteer for positions that support your dc's interests. Skip over all the "good" and be sure to hold out for the "best"! Once people learn that you will volunteer and that you have good skills and are reliable, they will be beating down your door. So take a deep breath, hang on for this tough part of the ride, and trust that it will all be worth it in the end! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 We've started our third year, and every fall I feel just like you described for a couple of weeks. We had an awful first week of school. But, I know it will get better and that it is all worth it. I choose to do things for myself, also. I go to a dance class once a week, and I go on several scrapbooking weekends per year, just so that I have something of my own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom22ns Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 I loved homeschooling from the start, but I can remember a conversation I had where I was in tears explaining that I had given up everything I loved doing in order to homeschool. I was a PTA mom, school volunteer who worked part time in my own business, had a black belt and was teaching Tai Kwon Do and women's self defense class. I left school and PTA and volunteering and my business and TKD. I know what it is to feel like you have lost your identity to homeschooling. Give it time. You will find yourself again. I am not who I was before, but I love who I have become and what I do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsmom2011 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Hello everyone! This is my first year homeschooling. I have two boys, 10 and 8. We started 3 weeks ago and right now, I am hating it. I feel like every pary of who I was before homeschooling has been squashed. I was the PTO parent, volunteer, snack making mom who ran a non-profit organization and worked part time. Now, everything that was enjoyable to me is gone. We chose to homeschool because we felt our youngest, who is gifted, needed to be challenged and our oldest simply had some rough classmates. So, we thought we would try homeschooling. Now, I feel like a complete failure. Everyone here in the forum loves it and finds it to be wonderful. However, here I am trying desperately not to fall into a deep emotional abyss. :( :grouphug: I am starting my 7th year of hsing, and have been feeling pretty stressed myself this past week. There will always be good days and not so good days. Sometimes when things get too stressful we take it as a signal to take a day off and just have some fun. Are there any homeschool groups in your area? Maybe it would help to connect with other homeschool moms. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest froggy0521 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Thank you for the encouraging words everyone! We have joined a few homeschool groups and an art class. It is just the loss of everyday adult interaction that I am missing quite a bit. Also, a big thing right now is that I feel like I can't just enjoy the boys. I feel like I am always on them to make sure they are doing schoolwork. Then, at night, I am either on them to go to their soccer/cross country. There is just no enjoyment for their belly laughs,corny jokes or quirks. I just know that right now, I'm not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.