laughing lioness Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 This is the hardest part of parenting imho. They want thier way, independence, whatever resources the parents have (time, attention, money, insurance, car, great holidays, gifts, kudos, affection, etc.etc.), but don't tell them what to do ever, or give your opinion, or share examples, and they do.not ever want to hear about your life, and somehow it's the parent's fault when what you told them wouldn't turn out doesn't turn out. And if they are rude, inconsiderate, selfish- the parent has misunderstood. My revenge is going to be that they WILL.NOT.DRIVE.ME.CRAZY. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane in NC Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Oh goodness... Sending virtual chocolate your way! :grouphug: Jane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dbmamaz Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 ME TOO!! My daughter is 20, and we had a really hard time when she was younger, too - but she still drives me nuts. I asked her to stop trolling me on my facebook page and she said she'd have to defriend me to do that. :confused: and i never try, and the things i do are the wrong things, and the things we do for her now are minimal (I buy my own lunch now, sometimes, so you arent really feeding me). The thing is, she's a real dynamo who will go far, i'm sure . . . but i cant wait until she has more in her life than just mom. She went to high school and then was dual enrolled but is not in touch with any friends. She was working for a while but they kept scheduling her to close at 11:30 when she had to be at school (30 minutes away) at 8 am . . . but dh is mad about her quitting. anyways, i'm pretty sure she'll move far away when she's done with school, so i try to just make the best of it. Even when she points out she didnt miss being here at ALL when she was living with friends out of state for 7 months, and thats SO SAD (and all my fault). Mmm hmm. Cuz i would totally expect a strong-willed, independent minded 18 yo who chose to move all the way across the country to be with her bf to miss her mom . . . . so glad you came back even tho I'm doing it all wrong. :tongue_smilie: :glare: :rant::banghead::biggrinjester: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughing lioness Posted September 9, 2012 Author Share Posted September 9, 2012 Thanks, Jane! :grouphug:db. 1/2 pot of coffee and a mellow morning and I think I've regained some equilibrium. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphabetika Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Yep. Whew! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TranquilMind Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 This is the hardest part of parenting imho. They want thier way, independence, whatever resources the parents have (time, attention, money, insurance, car, great holidays, gifts, kudos, affection, etc.etc.), but don't tell them what to do ever, or give your opinion, or share examples, and they do.not ever want to hear about your life, and somehow it's the parent's fault when what you told them wouldn't turn out doesn't turn out. And if they are rude, inconsiderate, selfish- the parent has misunderstood. My revenge is going to be that they WILL.NOT.DRIVE.ME.CRAZY. Oh my goodness, can I relate. Can I come hang out with you? Going through the same thing here, and mind isn't even officially an adult yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane in NC Posted September 9, 2012 Share Posted September 9, 2012 Thanks, Jane! :grouphug:db. 1/2 pot of coffee and a mellow morning and I think I've regained some equilibrium. Glad to hear it. My son has a sort of semi-respectful glazing of the eyes when I move into unsolicited "let me give you some advice" mode. I know that he is not really listening but he is putting up a good front. This can infuriate me or make me laugh--depending on my mood. It was good to have him with me for a week before the fall semester at college began. At the end of the week we had an argument over a triviality. It made me realize it was time for him to go back! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FloridaLisa Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Yes, just when you think you have mastered the baby phase, can handle any 2--year-old meltdown, and can navigate your child through the teen years . . . you land squarely in the middle of a whole new phase: parenting the adult. Nobody warned us there would be yet another learning curve!! And yet, it's not really parenting an adult. It's walking alongside, continuing to advise when you are one of perhaps many advisors, getting a *vote* and not the final say-so in some decisions and praying that God Himself will lead where we are unable. Releasing and transitions are not easy. But I do think, in the end, a good hand-off and transition are worth it. Hugs to my fellow baton passers, Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lllll Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Well. My Dh's revenge is an axe to their house. You're ahead of the game. ;) :grouphug: It is so hard. I never got it before, and I so do now. My favorite is when I say something and they don't listen, and then the SO says the same thing? And EUREKA! They walk on water. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 .....WILL.NOT.DRIVE.ME.CRAZY. Wow, I have you as the perfect mom :) I've read your blog.... etc. So I feel better after your post. I will choose not to go crazy, too!! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughing lioness Posted September 11, 2012 Author Share Posted September 11, 2012 You all are the best. Thanks for the validation, and :grouphug:. Nayfies- wow. Glad I was able to give a reality check. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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