Female or Male pediatrician? Does it matter?

[JRmommy]

I have a 6 year old son and a 6 week old daughter. I'm in search for a new pediatrician and wondering if I should do a different one for each based on gender alone. I am considering an office that has both male and female pediatricians, so different offices won't be an issue.

 

What have you done? Does it really matter? What about in the long run when the kids get older?

[Rivka]

I picked the pediatrician I liked best. I'm guessing that as puberty approaches, my daughter will want a female doctor. I've had the chance to meet several of the female docs over time, so when she wants to switch I'll know who to ask for. In the meantime, it's a lot easier to have one doctor for both kids.

[kalanamak]

Pick the good doctor.

 

I recall being wheeled in for a gynecological surgery. The *nurse* had the gall to lean down to me and hiss, "How can you let a MAN do this surgery on you?" What if I was some scared woman? Ugh. I, through the dope going in my veins, relied, "I'm letting a gynecologist do this surgery."

[stripe]

I take two of mine to a female pediatrician, but I think I will eventually pick another for my son. However at this point he seems fine about his pediatrician and it's not awkward. I switched from a male pediatrician because I like this one better.

[LinRTX]

My son went to a male and my daughters to a female. Actually the older two went to a male until they were 10 and 6; I could not find a good female before then, but when we were expecting our last I finally found one I liked even better than the male doctor. My son, though, was 14 and there was absolutely no way he was going to a female.

 

Linda

[Evergreen State Sue]

When my ds was about 8 and my dd about 6 we had to switch doctors for insurance reasons. I took the opportunity to get a female doctor for my dd and I and a male doctor for my dh and ds. Any doctor appointment that requires my ds to undress, I have my dh take him now.

[RoughCollie]

We've always had female pediatricians. DS1 switched to a male internist a few months ago. His brothers don't mind having a female doctor.

 

When the boys were little, they were surprised to find out that men could be physicians.

Edited September 5, 2012 by RoughCollie

[Janie Grace]

We have a female pediatrician (one-doctor practice) but are about to switch. My eldest ds (11) really wants a male doctor and my dd (13) wants to continue to see a female. I will find a practice with both. So yes, I think it does matter eventually.

[DianeW88]

My dd LOVES her male pediatrician and never had a problem with him. In fact, she was over the moon when he said he could continue to see her until she turned 21.

 

When I lived in another state, we all went to a female ped.

 

I choose the best doctor and could care less about their gender.

[tammieb]

In the beginning, I used the same pediatrician for both of mine. My daughter is at the "awkward age," and she is getting nervous about seeing a male doc. Thankfully, the clinic we use has 4 docs that see each other's patients, and there is a very good female doc in the practice. We haven't had to see the doc with her lately, but I'm sure once we explain what she's dealing with, our doc will be fine with it. He's been wonderful to both of mine.

 

Good luck!

[xixstar]

We have a male ped now because he is the best doctor for our family. My oldest has never indicated being uncomfortable because he is a he, more because he is a doctor and she isn't a fan of doctors. :)

[justLisa]

Most of the drs I have liked have been male. Not sure why that is. Our ped is male.

[Dobela]

My son prefers a male pediatrician. He used females in the same practice when he was younger, but now asks for the male. My dd uses a different clinic (long story) and sees a female. We now her personally and love her. Since both kids are happy, we just take them to the one they prefer. My son goes so infrequently now that it doesn't matter much to me.

[ErinE]

I went with a practice that has both male and female. Currently, our primary pediatrician is male, but as dd approaches puberty, I expect we'll switch to a female doctor for her.

[dirty ethel rackham]

My non-negotiables:

• Evidence-based medicine (that means not pushing antibiotics for viruses and knowing that preserving the breastfeeding relationship should be a high priority.)
  
• Has actual knowledge of infant nutrition
  
• Understands the difference between medical advice (which they are trained for) and parenting advice (which they are not trained for.)
  
• One that listened to me as the expert in my child.
  

 

When all of those criteria are met, then I choose the one I like the best and I have the better rapport with. Gender would not be a factor for me. My children's first pediatrician was a woman and she was terrible (as in she broke all of my must haves.) Actually, I didn't find these qualities in pediatricians around here so we went with a family practitioner (who happens to be male) that we love. Gender would not be a factor for me. However, for a child at puberty, I might give my child a choice of male or female practitioner, given that my non-negotiables have been met.

[AimeeM]

I will run with their preferences. Right now, all three kiddos (1 girl, two boys) have a male pediatrician. I personally prefer male doctors (including my OBGYN), but if my daughter has a preference as she gets older, she can certainly transition to another (and I'll keep our current for my boys).

Come to think of it, she's 11 now. Is there a time, soon, when she will need to be "checked" (kwim?) by her doctor? If so, I should probably ask her if she wants to switch sooner than later...

[bettyandbob]

We used to see one female doctor in the practice. A few years ago, oldest ds insisted he see only a male doctor--so he sees the only male doctor. dd only wants to see a female doctor. She saw the male doctor once and hated him. I don't question his medical skill, but he made some stupid inappropriate statements about her involvement in ballet. So, besides being uncomfortable with men, dd just thinks he's a jerk. Youngest ds sees the woman dd sees. She's a good fit for him now, because she trained under one the specialists ds also sees, so it makes for good follow up in his care.

 

Both doctors are in the same practice so it doesn't make much of a difference to me. Oldest is really aged out anyway (17, away at college).

[ChristyB in TN]

I say pick a good dr. We had the most wonderful female pediatrician for years. She is the reason my daughter has wanted to be a dr. Since she could say it and is a pre med major now. That super fabulous dr left and we got stuck with a man/boy dr who I am certain is no older than 9 years old. I dislike going to him, not because he is a man, but because he is a patronizing twirp. :)

[StephanieZ]

For me, I didn't care the gender of the pediatrician until puberty. Around puberty, I swapped ds to a male pediatrician and left the girls with a female. When that female left the practice, I swapped the girls to another female. (Our peds. are at a large practice, so this is easy for us.)

 

If I had a DIVINE ped. who was in a small practice, I wouldn't necessarily switch to a same gender doctor unless there were ISSUES relating to sexual organs, but since it was easy for me to do so, I went ahead and did it when the opportunity arose.

 

FWIW, I would find a female gynecologist for the early years, too, at least until age 22ish. I just think it is more comfortable to have those discussions and exams with a female at least until child bearing years (at which time, all modesty flies, lol)

[Mommyof4ks]

I picked the best doctor when the kids were little, and now my dd still goes to him but goes to a PA in my GYN's office for female things, because she is female.

[Wheres Toto]

I've had the same pediatrician practice since my oldest was born. There are both male and female doctors in the practice. Around puberty my oldest decided she'd rather see a female and we started seeing on of them in particular for her. When it's for the little guys, or a sick visit, we just see whoever, since they are all great.

 

My oldest also just started visiting a gyn. She definitely wanted female there.

 

(interesting fact: Our ob/gyn is the one who delivered the Cake Boss's baby and Snookie went to our practice). :D

[rhrice3]

We selected ours years ago on their reputation. I really never thought about the male/female thing. When it comes to physicians, I think, the male/female question is silly - you want the best doctor for you.

 

That being said, I think that peds is in the top picks for female medical graduates. I have not seen a practice lately that did not have male and female. I would select one with both for the future - in case your daughter feels better with one or the other.

 

ReneeR

[happyhomemaker]

We have had male peds in the past. For some reason female peds tend to talk to me like I am a moron and know nothing about my kids. :glare: When we moved about 5 years ago, one of the kids got sick and we saw the first available doc- a woman. She was great with the kids, is wonderful about homeschooling, and spoke to me like an adult. She's still our ped today. :001_smile: All that to say, I take it on a doctor by doctor basis. Gender is not really a factor, but when the kids get older, I may reevaluate that.

[Parrothead]

In my life, I'm just lucky if I can find a competent GP. Finding a pediatrician is a bonus. I don't much care if said pediatrician is male or female. Dd has not specified a preference.

[phathui5]

We are lucky to have two great doctors, a guy for the boys and a lady for dd.

[Holly]

My DC have seen both male and female drs. over the years. I think the Dr.'s skill and bedside manner are more important than their gender. I also hate being talked down to and pushed around...those are my biggest factors! I also need to feel confident in their decisions. I can usually tell within 5 minutes if I like them or not. I've often ignored these first impressions and always regretted it down the road!

[Plucky]

We've had the same female pediatrician for 10 years. She's retiring and a male is taking over her practice. All my kids want to be with a woman since they loved this ped.

[IsabelC]

I'd choose someone whose attitude I like; gender doesn't come into it. I honestly hadn't ever even considered the idea of have a male for my son and a female for my daughters.

[gingersmom]

I tried to get my son and daughter different doctors but landed hating them both. We finally found a female doctor that both kids (and me) love.

 

My son had no preference but my daughter definitely wanted a female doctor.

[angela in ohio]

I have been **SO** happy to have our female family doctor all these years. We found her when my oldest was a few weeks old, after rejecting several awful pediatricians. Her dc are just a few years older than mine, and hearing her choices and seeing her advice come from experience as a mother has been so comforting.

 

As to gender... I can't imagine having a male family doctor or pediatrician for my teen (or pre-teen) girls. My oldest has to go to a male orthopedist, and she hates it. He is a very nice man, but it's still awkward.

Edited September 6, 2012 by angela in ohio

[Kathryn]

I picked a doctor, not a gender. She happens to be female. If they want a male doctor when they get older, we'll ask for suggestions. I went to a male doctor and there came a day when I wanted a female one. Once I got through the awkward teen years, I went back to him though. I'm still with him and DH goes to him now too. It's kind of neat because my dad was his attending during one of his med school rotations and I've been going to him since I was three (with the 5 years off as a teen), so he knows my history like the back of his hand.

[NittanyJen]

My boys (11 and 9) have a female family doctor, the same doctor I see. I asked them if this bothers them now, or will bother them when they need their private parts examined.

 

They both looked at me as if I was from Mars, and said, "She's a good doctor, isn't she? Why would that bother us?"

 

Matter settled.

 

My OB/gyn is male. That doesn't bug me either-- he is an excellent doc, listens to me, gives excellent advice, and that is what matters to me.

[TheApprentice]

Our practice has a group of doctors and unless you specifically request one, you get who you get. It wasn't until my older two turned around 11-12 did they want me to request a male.

[swellmomma]

Gender doesn't matter as much as having a ped that will listen to a mom's intuition and doesn't try to push their opinions of parenting on you(such as about vaxing, schooling, medication usage etc) This is especially important imo if you opt to do many things non-mainstream.

[Alice]

My experience is that some kids care a lot and some don’t care at all. At my office we do have male and female docs which is somewhat intentional so that kids can have a choice and be comfortable with what they want. My own experience is that teens don’t care that much, they understand that a doctor is a doctor. Yes, it might be a bit awkward but they get why it has to be done. The age that seems to be most weirded out by me seeing them is the roughly 8-12 year old boy. But most of them just aren’t particularly thrilled at any doctor checking them out or asking personal questions.

 

I’ve had some patients who I saw for years switch to the male in the practice when their boys got older. Some of those have then switched back to me because they decided they were more comfortable with who they knew.

 

I’d say pick someone you like now and don't worry too much about it. There are so many vairables. Your kids might not care which gender, the male or female doc you pick because of gender might move away, you might move away, a new fantastic doc of a different gender might move to town, the doc might switch genders.

 

Ok, I put that last one in there to see who is reading. :) Bottom line is pick a doctor who you like and who you and your kids are comfortable with. If later the gender becomes an issue, ask that doctor for help switching.

[Jpoy85]

DS sees a female and both girls see a male. I didnt plan it this way, its just the Ped that worked for each child :)