Co-sleeping arrangments issue

[busymama7]

We are due in 2 months with baby number nine, but one of our babies passed away so this will (hopefully) be the 8th baby we get the priviledge of raising.

 

With our first we made his crib into a side-car and co-slept with him in our bed more often then in the crib:001_smile:

 

With our second we bought an arms-reach co-sleeper(they were new!) and used that for her and all the rest. We like it because it extends our bedspace, prevents roll-offs and holds "stuff" like water and diapers etc. However, it is thrashed. Can. not. be. used. again. and we found out last time with a new bed with wooden rails that it does not sit flush and there was a gap. We quit using it when my daughter rolled into the crack. At that point she slept mostly in our bed with a bed rail on my side. Oh, the other thing we liked about the co-sleeper was giving the baby a place to go to bed before us and it allowed us snuggle time at bed time. I would pull the baby over to our bed upon waking where he/she would stay the rest of the night, but we do like that time to ourselves before the baby wakes for the first time.

 

Having said all that, I cant figure out what to get/do for this baby. We are running out of room in our house and it would be nice not to have the crib or even co-sleeper take up space in our room.

 

I think these are my options:

 

1-buy another co-sleeper since we really like it. Maybe a mini. But what about the gap issue with our new bed?

 

2-buy a baby hammock and have the baby start the night out in it. Would take up less space(probably hang it from ceiling) but wouldnt offer the roll off protection or the space to hold "stuff" Would also require me getting out of bed to get baby:tongue_smilie:

 

3-Make or buy something like this:

http://www.mamaroobabysling.com/newsite/HumanityCoSleeper.html

 

this would solve the roll off issue, but not the wanting the baby to start out in its own bed.

 

4- some combination of the above, like a regular bassinet and the pillow thing for when the baby joins us. still requires me getting out of bed...

 

We could use the full size crib as a side-car but we are pretty cramped for room and really dont want the big crib in our room(there is no room for it in the girls room either so its possible it wont get used at all!)

 

If I could do the arms-reach safely that would be my first choice since that is what we are used to and like. But I really feel it was unsafe last time because it couldnt go right up to the mattress. I am glad nothing bad happened but without a solution, Im not willing to use one again.

 

Does anyone have any other ideas?

 

Thanks!

[busymama7]

Oh, I should mention that placing the bed on the floor or me sleeping somewhere else with the baby are both not options. We want to sleep in our nice king sized bed WITH the baby.

[labst60]

We had this for our youngest

http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3977276&cp=2255957.2273443.2777251.2768961&green&ab=MyBuys:search_results

 

I really liked it - we put it between us in the king size bed.

[busymama7]

We had this for our youngest

http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3977276&cp=2255957.2273443.2777251.2768961&green&ab=MyBuys:search_results

 

I really liked it - we put it between us in the king size bed.

 

Yes Ive seen simular things. But I dont get it. My breasts will not reach over the sides:001_smile: which is the whole point to co-sleeping! Nursing while asleep! Plus the issue comes not when the baby is between us, but when the baby is on theother side because Im about to burst and must switch sides. (I have leaned over to use opposite breast, but that is not comfortable)

 

Thank you though! I want to consider all options.

[labst60]

Oh... well I can see where that would be a problem... I could never nurse while asleep- but I liked being able to rub their heads, give them their paci or just pick them up to nurse/slide them back to sleep. It wouldn't work for nursing the baby while in there - but even now - I WAKE UP to nurse her (19 months).....(obviously she is long out of the nest and just sleeps between us!)

[busymama7]

Oh... well I can see where that would be a problem... I could never nurse while asleep- but I liked being able to rub their heads, give them their paci or just pick them up to nurse/slide them back to sleep. It wouldn't work for nursing the baby while in there - but even now - I WAKE UP to nurse her (19 months).....(obviously she is long out of the nest and just sleeps between us!)

 

I on the other hand have attempted to stay awake and it is just impossible!

[xixstar]

If a side-car crib won't work and the co-sleeper doesn't work - sounds like baby will be in bed with you. I love the idea of the amby-beds but I wouldn't use one in my bedroom because of nursing, I like to sleep and nurse.

 

With a king size bed, I'd probably just do the bedrail instead of the pillow that would take up tons of space. You can do a little pack and play bassinet to put baby down first and on first waking bring into your bed for the night, maybe?

 

We have done the side-car crib and just took it down after having it up for 3 years, oh the space is back!! But we also did a bed rail for when the baby was in our bed and the toddler was in the side-car crib and that worked out okay with only having a queen-size bed (and dh and I are not small people either). I would snuggle dh in the night until babe woke and then roll to her to nurse. Oh I also used rolled up receiving blankets wedged between babe and me just to she wouldn't keep rolling into me as I moved around, that kept her in her space and so did swaddling that we do for a while to help with better sleeping.

 

eta: if you mainly want babe to have a place to sleep for first part of the night, then the hammock bed could work well. I'm kinda unsure as to holding stuff. But that and a bed rail could be used.

Edited August 30, 2012 by xixstar

[Jpoy85]

I would co-sleep without anything you listed above. BUT thats what worked for us. It may not work for you.

 

this is such a touchy subject and you may get a variety of thoughts. You can always try something and if it doesnt work, try something else.

[jessicalb]

Have you thought of a Pack n' Play or a bassinette that is the right height for you to be able to reach in from lying down to bring baby into bed with you? Or a twin on the floor next to the bed so you just have to reach down to grab her and bring her into bed with you?

 

Congratulations on the new baby! :)

[sillymommy]

Caveat: what I'm about to type isn't approved by any safety standards.

 

We loved our co-sleeper as well, but got rid of it with baby #4. Instead we bought an extra long bed rail(intended for use on a kid's twin bed). I installed it on my side of the bed. Baby slept btw me & the bed rail. I stashed my water, dipes, etc on a bed side table just over the bed rail. Worked like a dream for us. Still using it and baby is 20 months.

 

Although this doesn't offer the option of a baby-free bed, it does allow for baby to be placed far enough away from mom & dad during snuggle time without fear of roll out.

 

Good luck as you make your decision!

[AdventureMoms]

Well, you could do a cosleeper (maybe get a used one? Most people really don't use them much...) and get some high-density foam to stuff in between the bed and the cosleeper to make a continuous surface. Or I'd get a bassinet that is high enough to reach from the bed and just put baby in there for the first part of the night for your grownup time. Then baby can come in with you for the rest of the night for nursing while asleep. Which yes, for me, is the point of cosleeping. I think I slept through the night 2 years before DD did!

[CourtneyBrooke]

We tried a hammock with our most recent baby because it seemed so lovely... flexible and rocks the child... Found out that not only was it extremely difficult to use and not at all practical, it had been recalled for safety issues (children smothered in it). So do your research.

 

I've co-slept for 11 years with no other gadgets, so I have no advice :(

[jessicalb]

Well, you could do a cosleeper (maybe get a used one? Most people really don't use them much...) and get some high-density foam to stuff in between the bed and the cosleeper to make a continuous surface.

 

If you do this I would suggest putting a sheet or something and stretching it tight across that gap, over the foam and both mattresses. Even then it seems scary to me. I'd honestly rather my baby roll off and hit the carpet than risk a gap/smothering situation.

[busymama7]

If you do this I would suggest putting a sheet or something and stretching it tight across that gap, over the foam and both mattresses. Even then it seems scary to me. I'd honestly rather my baby roll off and hit the carpet than risk a gap/smothering situation.

 

Exactly! That is why I put it away as soon as it became obvious it was a problem.

 

But those of you who use nothing, how do you keep baby from rolling off? We have had all our babies roll off at some point. Either when they were older and co-sleeper was put away or while traveling etc. I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby. And I have to roll over and use other side and i fall asleep. I just don't get how to keep baby from falling off. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper too.

 

Argh. I am so annoyed that this is a issue.

Edited August 30, 2012 by busymama7
Typo

[LittleIzumi]

Exactly! That is why I put it away as soon as it became obvious it was a problem.

 

But those of you who use nothing, how do you keep baby from rolling off? We have had all our babies roll off at some point. Either when they were older and co-sleeper was put away or while traveling etc. I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby. And I have to roll over and use other side and i fall asleep. I just don't get how to keep baby from falling off. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper too.

 

Argh. I am so annoyed that this is a issue.

 

Mine have only rolled off when they were old enough to be mobile--months and months old. It was nap time during the day. And they were fine. They've never rolled off in the night, ever.

[busymama7]

Mine have only rolled off when they were old enough to be mobile--months and months old. It was nap time during the day. And they were fine. They've never rolled off in the night, ever.

 

Well mine have. And I don't care to leave them on the bed unattended for naps either until I teach them how to get off at about ten months. No one seems to have any negative affects from their tumbles but it is unnecessary pain if there is a simple solution.

[AdventureMoms]

Yeah, DD rolled off a few times once she was a toddler - like 18mo+ However we have a mattress & box on the floor so the fall is only about 1.5feet and I usually stick a folded quilt or something there. Often she didn't wake up when she fell. The boys never fell, but went into cribs at about 9mo because they were harassing each other. When all three coslept we had a twin against a wall, then the queen (a bit higher) next to that. No bedframes, all mattresses and boxsprings. DD slept in the twin against the wall, then me, the twins, DW.

 

When it was just DD, I'd switch sides for nursing, but she slept in the crook of my arm. that kept her in bed at least until she was mobile.

[skeeterbug]

I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby.

 

I'd check into different kinds. Would a rolled-up baby blanket (rolled lengthwise) and stuffed into the gap do the trick?

 

As for the wooden rails on your bed- are they decorative? We had a bed where we could take the wooden rail off and it didn't affect the bed frame because the rails were just decorative. This allowed the crib to be pushed closer and no gap.

[Jpoy85]

Exactly! That is why I put it away as soon as it became obvious it was a problem.

 

But those of you who use nothing, how do you keep baby from rolling off? We have had all our babies roll off at some point. Either when they were older and co-sleeper was put away or while traveling etc. I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby. And I have to roll over and use other side and i fall asleep. I just don't get how to keep baby from falling off. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper too.

 

Argh. I am so annoyed that this is a issue.

 

Mine havent rolled off. Im being honest. I put them in the middle not on the edge side. No issues.

[melissad2]

IDK, I have a mini co-sleeper and the mattress in the cosleeper isn't flush with the bed anyway. There is still a raised side even with the rail down on the sleeper. My bed has a wooden rail too and it isn't an issue for me, couldn't you just put the side rail up on the cosleeper? I still have to lift my baby out of the sleeper and into my bed for nursing even with the rail rolled down and the leg extensions on the sleeper. It is really no different than the pack and play except it is smaller.

[Stayseeliz]

Just make sure if you're using a bedrail or even have a headboard make sure there is NO way a baby can get stuck in between the bed and anything else and suffocate. A family I know here had that happen with their 8 month old this summer and they are devestated.

 

We do co-sleep until babies are around 9 months when they go to a crib right next to my bed. I've just always slept right next to them with a pillow on the other side of them between them and daddy. They slept pretty much on my arm. Worked great.

[BlsdMama]

Yes Ive seen simular things. But I dont get it. My breasts will not reach over the sides:001_smile: which is the whole point to co-sleeping! Nursing while asleep! Plus the issue comes not when the baby is between us, but when the baby is on theother side because Im about to burst and must switch sides. (I have leaned over to use opposite breast, but that is not comfortable)

 

Thank you though! I want to consider all options.

 

We're expecting our eleventh (we lost a little one too) and I know just what I'm doing this time around... We're adding another bed. :D

 

That MamaRoo product was interesting, but at the end of the day, you are still limited by the size of your bed. Now, use that to cover the crack between a twin and your bed and you're all set.

 

We've co-slept with all of our children, some as long as five years. Others (specifically Rebecca) as short as a few months. I haven't owned a crib since 2004 but I really thought about getting one this year as our two year old is a groper and I am touched out.

 

Earlier this year when Olivia (14 months) and Daniella (2) were both in our bed, we were not sleeping well and needed more room. We moved a twin into our room. It was lovely. We pushed the twin up tight against the wall and then our bed tight against the twin. It also allowed me extra space to roll the baby away from me and go back to my bed. :) My only complaint was that crack! (Well, and that I couldn't make my bed properly in the morning. That drove me nuts.)

 

My .02.

[BlsdMama]

Exactly! That is why I put it away as soon as it became obvious it was a problem.

 

But those of you who use nothing, how do you keep baby from rolling off? We have had all our babies roll off at some point. Either when they were older and co-sleeper was put away or while traveling etc. I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby. And I have to roll over and use other side and i fall asleep. I just don't get how to keep baby from falling off. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper too.

 

Argh. I am so annoyed that this is a issue.

 

No. There is a bed rail that sits ON the mattress instead of beside it. It "clamps" down onto the mattress. You lose some mattress space because of it, but it works great.

 

 

E.T.A. Studies are showing babies ought not be put in between parents either. Supposedly daddies don't have the same "alarm" system that mamas have. Men are far more likely to squish baby. My husband sleeps lighter than I do, but the babies next to him make him sleep so light that he continually wakes. So, in both situations it is easier if baby is between me and the wall.

Edited August 30, 2012 by BlsdMama

[ktgrok]

Exactly! That is why I put it away as soon as it became obvious it was a problem.

 

But those of you who use nothing, how do you keep baby from rolling off? We have had all our babies roll off at some point. Either when they were older and co-sleeper was put away or while traveling etc. I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby. And I have to roll over and use other side and i fall asleep. I just don't get how to keep baby from falling off. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper too.

 

Argh. I am so annoyed that this is a issue.

 

We put the bed against the wall.

[xixstar]

Exactly! That is why I put it away as soon as it became obvious it was a problem.

 

But those of you who use nothing, how do you keep baby from rolling off? We have had all our babies roll off at some point. Either when they were older and co-sleeper was put away or while traveling etc. I don't feel a bed rail is all that safe either because it can create a gap big enough for body but allow head to trap. Maybe I need a different kind but the ones we have tried have seemed safe enough for toddler/preschooler but not a baby. And I have to roll over and use other side and i fall asleep. I just don't get how to keep baby from falling off. I'm a pretty heavy sleeper too.

 

Argh. I am so annoyed that this is a issue.

 

Our bed rail was installed very tight against the mattress and has mesh sides - it had legs that tuck between the mattress and box spring and then a strap and big metal circle that you feed across to the other side of the bed (between mattress and boxspring) and then adjust it nice and tight so it pulls the rail tight to the mattress. That make sense?

 

It also had this metal bar that basically sat on the top edge of the mattress so there was no gaps at all.Ours could be folded down but I had it so snug that it was really hard to get it unlatched and re-latched, plus with the bed frame it would stick out from the bed instead of hanging down, so we never folded it down.