OnTheBrink Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 To say it's been stressful is an understatement. Let me preface this saga by saying I'm the president of our deaconess board, which means that I schedule the specific committees and oversee a lot of stuff. Oh, and I fill in when other deaconesses can't be at their assigned duty. It all started a week ago, on Wednesday. It was announced that one of our members had her baby. We have a deaconess committee that schedules meals to be delivered to the new mom. I noticed one of the deaconesses on that committee was there for the announcement, so I figured the meals were covered. The gals on this committee are great about keeping on top of this, so I was not concerned. Well, on Friday, I got a call from the mother of the new mom asking why no one had contacted her for meals. I called the committee chair and asked her who was up for that for this particular mom and she said she wasn't positive, but would arrange the meals herself, no biggie. I called the grandma back, told her who was making the arrangements and figured all was well. I was, however, a bit annoyed that the ball had been dropped and that the gal who heard the announcement didn't take the initiative to get this going. But, all was taken care of, no big deal. Sunday morning (communion Sunday) I got a call from one of the elders at 8:15 am, asking me why there were no communion trays set up. I about blew a gasket. I knew that this was the month the same deaconess who didn't get meals arranged for the new mom was supposed to get communion done. I called and left her a direct and (to be honest) not as seasoned with grace as I'd have liked message on what ended up being her husband's cell phone. I grabbed dd and dashed to church to get communion set up. I arrived at church (thankfully, I only live 5 minutes away) to find a few folks generously attempting to help get things set up, but honestly, were just creating more work for me, as things were just a mess. Top that off with the fact that there weren't enough cups for all 12 trays. Eight trays go for the main floor; 4 go up in the balcony. We only had enough for 8 trays. About this time, one of the deacons came up with the brilliant idea to empty all the coffee creamer cups and use those.:glare: His lovely wife, however, suggested just closing off the balcony and making everyone sit on the main floor so there'd be enough trays. About this time, our pastor came into the kitchen and agreed to close down the balcony. He asked who was supposed to be doing communion and I told him who it was. He said, "Oh. I need to talk to you about that..." Turns out, this particular deaconess is going through a marital separation and asked to be let off the board while she and her dh work through this time. Well, NO ONE TOLD ME THIS! Pastor said, "I was supposed to tell you about this and I forgot. I'm sorry!" UGH! So, here I've left a scolding message on this gals HUSBAND'S cell phone and she's separated from him. I felt terrible about that. I also felt terrible about the communion cup issue, as I wasn't sure if I was the one who was supposed to keep on top of that. (Turns out I'm not; we have an elder assigned to that job). As it turned out, we had exactly half a tray of juice left after the service, and everyone got served communion. So thus ended Communion Crisis '08. Then, this week was VBS. I was in the craft room and I tell you, I'm DONE with helping with VBS. I can't take the noise. I just can't. The yelling, the screaming, the high energy. It makes me extremely tense and jittery and I lose patience very fast. I just can't do it. This week was just torturous for me, noise-wise. So, bearing in mind that I had to pinch hit for a few duties at the last minute, and bearing in mind that I'm half insane from sensory overload, it didn't please me at all to receive a list of duties the assistant VBS director dropped on me, expecting the 3 elderly deaconesses in charge of the VBS cookie reception to lift tables and set up 6 gallon drink coolers of lemonade outside. So. I met with the VBS director, asking her to clarify what it was she expected, as her assistant's list called for duties to be done that are not outlined in the deaconess manual and further, were unrealistic for 3 elderly women to accomplish. Turns out. NONE OF THE VBS COOKIE RECEPTION COMMITTEE WAS EVEN AVAILABLE! AUGHGHGHGHGH! So, I take a deeeeeep breath and start recruiting other deaconesses from other committees to help. Thankfully, we got things done and cleaned up and VBS 2008 is OVER. Top all that off with the fact I'm PMSing, I'm tired, my nerves are shot and I came THIS CLOSE to curling up in a corner and crying. And, we had no less than 15 packages of Oreos left over and did I bring home even one package? NO! I totally forgot! We really need to improve on communication. I don't mind filling in, when I know in advance and can be prepared, but this last minute stuff is just irritating to no end. End of saga. Quote
dragons in the flower bed Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 (((Sola))) I'm sorry your week has sucked. Quote
WTMindy Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: No advice, just lots of hugs and prayers. Your service does not go unnoticed!! :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote
LauraGB Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 I'm sorry you had an even stinkier week than I :-( But, you can give yourself a pat on the back that you were able to be the ONE to do it all. With all the noise of the energetic kids, I don't know that I would have been strong enough to hold on after all that. You deserve some serious credit. And, can't you go back and nab one or 12 of those bags of Oreos?? Sleep. Tomorrow will be better:) Quote
*anj* Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 I'm sorry you had such a hard week, M. Bureaucracy is such a frustrating thing, isn't it? And why was that woman at the meeting if she has asked to be relieved of her duties? It would've been nice if she'd pulled you aside after the meeting. Maybe it's still just too hard for her to talk about it. Anyway, I know you're glad it's over. And now a new one is about to begin! :001_smile: Quote
Kathleen in VA Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 :grouphug:Michelle:grouphug: I would have had a meltdown. At least you handled it. You have to be pretty excited about that.:) Quote
OnTheBrink Posted July 14, 2008 Author Posted July 14, 2008 I'm sorry you had such a hard week, M. Bureaucracy is such a frustrating thing, isn't it? And why was that woman at the meeting if she has asked to be relieved of her duties? It would've been nice if she'd pulled you aside after the meeting. Maybe it's still just too hard for her to talk about it. Anyway, I know you're glad it's over. And now a new one is about to begin! :001_smile: She asked the pastor if she needed to talk to me, but he said he'd take care of it himself. I think the situation is still very raw with her right now. Every time I've seen her this week, she's been on the brink of tears. I don't blame her for stepping down for now, I just wish I'd known before 8:15 am on Sunday! LOL Thanks, everyone, for the encouragement! :) Quote
Kelli in TN Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Well, I am stressed out just reading all that!!!! Good on you for coming through. I would probably let the woman know that I had called the STBXH and apologize (though you did so unknowingly) and give her a hug (if she and you are huggie sort of people). For all the rest of it, let it go. I think people understand that you can only work with as much information as you have. Quote
lori in tx Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 I'm sorry you had such a hard week, M. Bureaucracy is such a frustrating thing, isn't it? And why was that woman at the meeting if she has asked to be relieved of her duties? It would've been nice if she'd pulled you aside after the meeting. Maybe it's still just too hard for her to talk about it. Anyway, I know you're glad it's over. And now a new one is about to begin! :001_smile: That is exactly what I was wondering. If it was too hard to talk about she could have easily have written you a note or something. I will say that I love the Lord and love to serve but the day I stepped away from most of my church responsiblities was one of the most happiest days ever. I was so overloaded and on top of it homeschooling, I am no suggesting that just throughing it out as it was a good thing for me Oh and VBS we stopped going the year after I was director, we for some reason always seemed to go on vacation that week LOL blessings lori Quote
JumpedIntoTheDeepEndFirst Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 All I can say is you are not alone! And thanks to lovely ladies like you events like VBS happens. And because it happens there are children who benefit. Thank you to you and all those like you~! Quote
Doran Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 I'm sorry. I've been in similar situations more than I can count (not church, but other event related), and it is totally crazy-making. I can tell you with certainty, though, that there are folks in your community who have noticed. Even if they never thank you outright, I can promise you they've thanked you inwardly, evidenced by the fact that you're the one who got the calls, you're the one who made it work, you're the lady everyone counted on to figure it out. They're saying, "Thank goodness Michella was there!" As a final little wrap up to your wonderfulness, may I suggest you make a point of contacting or seeing the woman who is recently separated. I'm sure she's feeling like her whole world is coming apart at the seams (you get this, I know). A hand squeeze or a hug, a kind voice or a card would, I'm sure, mean so much to her. Don't bang your head against the wall, though. You had no way of knowing. Go now. And purchase thee a package of Oreos. You deserve to treat yourself! :D Quote
GSMP Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Wow...that makes my trip to the ER pale in comparison...... I'm sorry you had such a tough time.....:grouphug: Quote
readwithem Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 :grouphug:Oh Michelle! I'm with you - I'm way past the VBS age kiddo-wise, and I haven't done anything with it for years. I'm so sorry you have had all these issues and I think you are right - you all need a better way of communicating. My mom used to have a plaque on her wall at work that said "A lack of planning on your part doesn't result in a sense of urgency on my part." Hoping this week is better for you!!! Quote
Sharon H in IL Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Good grief. I'd be curled up under a heavy piece of furniture, too. You have sure taken on a big chunk of responsibility, and along with that comes more than a few weeks like this one. Volunteer organizations like churches should give out medals to people like you, Michelle. Call a few friends over for some tea or Mike's Hard Lemonade or head out to a watering hole. You deserve a break, honey. Edited to add: Am I the only one who thinks a message on stb-xdh's phone isn't necessarily a bad thing? The fallout from a marriage collapse hits a lot more people than just the two main parties. It might be God's way of communicating something to him. Quote
Diana in OR Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Sorry you had to deal w/all that craziness. Sounds like you did a great job in spite of everything. I'm going to teach you a phrase I've learned. It may sound cold and uncaring, but it helps me cope, lol. Say it with me...... "Lack of preparation on your part does not constitute and emergency on my part."Of course, things happen at the last minute over which no one has any control. But I don't sweat it anymore when someone else has dropped the ball. Quote
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