As of today, there are only four months until Christmas.

[LucyStoner]

I must be the only one left who does all of her Christmas shopping in mid-December. I don't even think about Christmas presents until Dec. 1. :tongue_smilie:

 

This is basically me. Only some years December 1=more like December 15th.

[Annie G]

I've finished all my shopping already:tongue_smilie:

 

My inlaws are coming from Canada this year and staying six weeks :scared

 

Since we've never had them stay more then a few days without issues arising the stress levels will be high:glare

 

I'm already planning to spend a lot of time working in the yard - my gardens will be beautiful this year :D

 

If you drink, I hope one of the gifts you purchased is a huge bottle of your favorite adult beverage. And if you don't drink, start stocking up now on whatever you need to battle the stress. 6 weeks????? No way.

[FO4UR]

This year we have an extra-special Christmas Surprise!!!:001_wub: (See my siggie)

 

 

 

I can't wait!!! (I probably should get the shopping done early this year, huh?)

[EthiopianFood]

:thumbup:

[Harriet Vane]

I dread Christmas.

 

I enjoy the time with dh and the kids. I like giving dh and the kids their gifts. I also enjoy time with dh's family.

 

I HATE the shopping, the Christmas muzak, the kitsch everywhere, and the bad behavior of dysfunctional people in my life. It saps the very soul from me.

[Lab1]

I just picked out the kids first presents. Costco has really nice kids science experiment kits. Pack of 3 for $20!

[justamouse]

This year we have an extra-special Christmas Surprise!!!:001_wub: (See my siggie)

 

 

 

I can't wait!!! (I probably should get the shopping done early this year, huh?)

 

Get it done! I had one on Dec 23. WHEW. Then another on Dec 19. I was 9 months, couldn't walk, and THAT'S When Dh loves to shop. (Kill me now!)

[Surfside Academy]

I just picked out the kids first presents. Costco has really nice kids science experiment kits. Pack of 3 for $20!

 

Costco also just put out their Christmas decorations & wrapping paper. :scared:

[Starr]

Costco also just put out their Christmas decorations & wrapping paper. :scared:

 

Now you can wrap those presents as you buy them. :lol:

[peachskittles]

It's August...Our Walmart here is already getting ready for Christmas. All employees must work weekends for the rest of the year so they are prepared for people who will be shopping for Christmas. I love Christmas, I love shopping for the perfect gifts (even got a few already stashed away), but it is still AUGUST. I'm worried that I'm going to go in next month and Christmas will be in full swing, never mind the fact that they will be missing a few holidays in between. I miss the build up to the holiday like when I was little. My kids are going to be bored of Christmas decorations by October. :tongue_smilie:

[Forget-Me-Not]

DH and I went Christmas shopping tonight as part of our date :lol: We didn't actually buy anything, but we managed to come up with a few ideas.

[DianeW88]

To paraphrase one of my favorite Christmas movies..."I love Christmas! Christmas is my favorite!" :D

 

I've already started getting ready. Woo hoo!

[Denisemomof4]

:willy_nilly::willy_nilly::svengo::gnorsi:

 

 

LA, LA, LA, LA, LA I can't hear you!!!!

 

 

 

:iagree:

 

I always do a ton of baking for Christmas. All my kids LOVE it and look forward to their treats. We have to do dairy/gluten/sugar free and I just am not looking forward to it. We're not big sugar eaters at all, but Christmas is Christmas.

[sewingmama]

If you drink, I hope one of the gifts you purchased is a huge bottle of your favorite adult beverage. And if you don't drink, start stocking up now on whatever you need to battle the stress. 6 weeks????? No way.

 

I'm LDS -so I don't drink plus I'm on medication that doesn't mix with alcohol anyway :D Chocolate is not going to cut it.

 

They are coming on a 26 hour plane trip which is why they are staying so long. So far my stress relievers will be hiding out in the back yard and doing the weeding or hiding in a room and decluttering the closets :lol: I need to keep busy and focused -it makes it easier to bite my tongue.

 

We don't have a car big enough to fit all of us so I'm hoping DH will take them on many day trips with just the older kids.

 

The last time we tried to stay with them DH and I moved out to a motel within a week - and it was the middle of winter in Canada -and there was no hot water in the room because the pipes froze and the heater was sketchy -and I still thought it was heaven compared to staying with the inlaws :lol:

 

However we were newly married then and DH was still catering to my whims -after ten years of marriage he now tells me to just suck it up.:glare:

[Kim in Appalachia]

I bought a few gifts for my girls. I have a list written out for the boys. I think that Wii U is coming out and that's on the list, along with SmallWorld and Dominion (board games my boys are begging for). My dd14 gets skis this year. She'll be 15 at Christmas and she is done growing, feet and all. The only problem is because of scheduling issues we may not be able to take our once a year ski trip :( We need to find a way to get her on some slopes.

[Mommyfaithe]

I must be the only one left who does all of her Christmas shopping in mid-December. I don't even think about Christmas presents until Dec. 1. :tongue_smilie:

 

Nope....you are not alone! I buy simply.....and I don't worry until December.....and even then, I don't worry.....just have some fun with my kids, nieces, nephews etc......I do not allow stress over things that are supposed to be fun anymore:D

[DianeW88]

I can't speak for others, but I know for me it's definitely not a hobby, me not liking Christmas. I dread it to the point that I feel physically sick the week before hand. Not exactly fun or enjoyable. In front of the kids though, I put on a happy face and make sure that they get to have good memories out of it all.

 

Oh Ellie, did you have to? My lot are away this weekend and I was just feeling all calm and serene and peaceful for the first time in weeks, then you threw that at me. Ugh, I really, really do not like Christmas, I'm afraid.

 

 

But why??? And I don't mean this in a snarky way or anything...I just really don't understand why people dread Christmas, because it's so much fun for me. It's always baffled me, so I'm actually looking to be enlightened with my question. If the answer isn't too personal, of course. I sincerely don't mean to pry.

[Dory]

But why??? And I don't mean this in a snarky way or anything...I just really don't understand why people dread Christmas, because it's so much fun for me. It's always baffled me, so I'm actually looking to be enlightened with my question. If the answer isn't too personal, of course. I sincerely don't mean to pry.

 

 

Because after putting months of time and effort towards making it a fun enjoyable experience for all, it always ends with family members bickering and I don't handle conflict very well.

 

Also, for me, family get togethers always meant that some guy had his hands all over me and was expecting things from me that no little girl should handle, so now family get togethers tend to make me tense.

[Impish]

But why??? And I don't mean this in a snarky way or anything...I just really don't understand why people dread Christmas, because it's so much fun for me. It's always baffled me, so I'm actually looking to be enlightened with my question. If the answer isn't too personal, of course. I sincerely don't mean to pry.

For me, I've yet to find it 'fun'. It's stressful, emotionally, financially, and time wise. It's lonely, reminding me of what I don't have (emotionally stable extended family).

 

I'm trying to change that...just haven't figured out exactly *what* to do.

[Cassy]

But why??? And I don't mean this in a snarky way or anything...I just really don't understand why people dread Christmas, because it's so much fun for me. It's always baffled me, so I'm actually looking to be enlightened with my question. If the answer isn't too personal, of course. I sincerely don't mean to pry.

 

Because I'm a dope and probably try to do too much, and try to do it all on my own. Then I get really exhausted and feel utterly awful just at that moment when crowds of people I would otherwise do my best to avoid arrive on my doorstep. Although to be fair these people do try to be on their best behaviour, they somehow manage to slip in the odd comment that in my wrecked state manages to upset me terribly. By the end of it all I'm wishing DH would divorce me so that I never have to do it again. But I always do it again, because that's become our 'tradition' that my kids and everyone expect. Pathetic, aren't I? You know, I really, really want to just take my nearest and dearest away somewhere lovely one Christmas and to he// with the rest of them. I did insist one year that DH, the kids and I had a quiet Christmas here on our own, but that caused major upset the likes of which you cannot imagine, involving fraught, nasty phone calls over the entire Christmas period, so I'll not be trying that again :(.

 

Tell me, please, how do you manage to have so much fun?

[Cassy]

Also, for me, family get togethers always meant that some guy had his hands all over me and was expecting things from me that no little girl should handle, so now family get togethers tend to make me tense.

 

:sad: I'm so sorry.

 

:grouphug:

[justamouse]

Last year I just had my parents and brother over. I hated it.

 

It's hard work, but I've learned that I love having the people over, too.

[DianeW88]

Because after putting months of time and effort towards making it a fun enjoyable experience for all, it always ends with family members bickering and I don't handle conflict very well.

 

Also, for me, family get togethers always meant that some guy had his hands all over me and was expecting things from me that no little girl should handle, so now family get togethers tend to make me tense.

 

For me, I've yet to find it 'fun'. It's stressful, emotionally, financially, and time wise. It's lonely, reminding me of what I don't have (emotionally stable extended family).

 

I'm trying to change that...just haven't figured out exactly *what* to do.

 

Because I'm a dope and probably try to do too much, and try to do it all on my own. Then I get really exhausted and feel utterly awful just at that moment when crowds of people I would otherwise do my best to avoid arrive on my doorstep. Although to be fair these people do try to be on their best behaviour, they somehow manage to slip in the odd comment that in my wrecked state manages to upset me terribly. By the end of it all I'm wishing DH would divorce me so that I never have to do it again. But I always do it again, because that's become our 'tradition' that my kids and everyone expect. Pathetic, aren't I? You know, I really, really want to just take my nearest and dearest away somewhere lovely one Christmas and to he// with the rest of them. I did insist one year that DH, the kids and I had a quiet Christmas here on our own, but that caused major upset the likes of which you cannot imagine, involving fraught, nasty phone calls over the entire Christmas period, so I'll not be trying that again :(.

 

Tell me, please, how do you manage to have so much fun?

 

Ok, I totally understand difficult family issues would make it unpleasant. I don't have that problem, so perhaps that's why I have less stress.

 

When we lived near my in-laws, my dh and I always had a Christmas morning brunch (around 11 AM) so that the grandparents and any other extended relatives could see what Santa brought and spend time with them before we all went to MIL's for Christmas dinner.

 

Well, one year, MIL, SIL and two BILs all stayed up Christmas Eve until 4 AM, and couldn't get their sorrry selves out of bed and up to my house the next morning. Only FIL stopped by and apologized for them. Next year....I didn't have the brunch. MIL was a little put out, but I simply said, "I'm sorry, but I'm not doing it. You all basically stood me up last year and I spent Christmas morning cooking for you instead of playing with my children. I won't do it again." End of story. :D

 

Now, we live 500 miles away from MIL and 2,000 miles away from my family, and we LOVE dh's extended family that are nearby, so I have no family issues.

 

But honestly, don't let their issues become your problem. Smile sweetly, say no, and move on. Don't answer your phone if you have to. Don't give other people that kind of control over your happiness.

 

As for other reasons why I love Christmas...besides the religious aspect...the music, the lights, the joy and anticipation, the food, the parties, the cookies, the movies. I try and keep things very organized and start planning with checklists (I use the one link another posted already gave), so that it doesn't all come crashing over me right after Thanksgiving. By then, my shopping is done, presents are wrapped, food is baked and in the freezer, decorations are up, cards are ready to be mailed (we take our family photo in Oct.), and I'm just ready to enjoy being with my family and having fun.

[Dory]

:sad: I'm so sorry.

 

:grouphug:

 

 

Thanks, it's no big deal though. All part of life.

[justLisa]

We are absolute Christmas freaks. I don't even know how I can explain it :lol:

 

DS and grandpa spend DAYS upon DAYS putting up Christmas lights. We play Christmas music all day long and watch Christmas movies every night. We make too many cookies and DD makes far too many Christmas crafts.

 

We don't have anyone over. It's just us and my parents and sister. I have many horrible family members and Christmas just makes me more happy to have my very tiny little family unit here, that is normal ;).

 

On Christmas day we all stay in our jammies all day and eat really unhealthy finger foods all. day. long.

 

I've been making Christmas gifts since June!

 

ETA: It seems many feel bad about other family. We are entirely selfish and worry ONLY about ourselves on Christmas. It's CHRISTMAS!!! Holly jolly Laaaaa!! It's supposed to be no stress. We just don't do Christmas company

Edited August 26, 2012 by 425lisamarie

[Farmgirl70]

I understand that some people don't like Christmas, but I love it. Here's what's helped:

 

1. We focus on the traditions that we all enjoy. Every year around Thanksgiving, we sit down and share what will make Christmas meaningful and enjoyable for us all. We make those things happen. They are usually simple. These things make the list every year: cutting down our Christmas tree and decorating it, decorating sugar cookies, singing carols in the evening by the Christmas tree, seeing the lights around town.

 

2. We try to keep most of our preparations limited to after Thanksgiving. We manage by keeping things simpler--fewer gifts, decorations and treats. (Fewer, not none, and well chosen so everyone has their favorites). I'm usually the one who has to keep my expectations in check. (I do sometimes start earlier with gifts. I like to make things)

 

3. Remember to let some things go--the in-laws won't die if I don't give them something they absolutely love (though I'd like to), things won't come crashing down if the cleaning isn't perfectly done, no one will suffer if I make fewer treats than we wanted. What they will notice is if I am cranky and stressed.

 

4. Online shopping is my friend. I don't like going into stores very much during the holidays--crowded, hard to find what I'm looking for and I see ideas that I never thought of before.

 

5. We try to do some project that focuses on others who have need. It puts everything in perspective.

 

6. We've carved out some time for our nuclear family to celebrate alone. (We do see extended family some, but our family needs its time, too)

 

That's what helps me. I do hope you find ways to enjoy Christmas. Right now, though, I'm trying not to think about it. Time to think about starting our school year and enjoying the autumn season!

[Impish]

I def need to make my expectations more realistic.

 

What I can do *now* vs before I had RSD are hugely different. And I never fail to feel guilty b/c of it. My family LOVES baking, I used to go completely nuts at Christmas w/different kinds of cookies, etc. And now, I simply can't. (That's not even thinking about the whole GF issue for me).

 

None of my siblings talk to each other. I miss my brothers, esp on the holidays...One's birthday is Hallowe'en, the other's Christmas Day.

 

I need to quit beating myself up over stuff beyond my control.

 

And, I admit, I let go of what we don't have, and focus on being grateful of what we do. No, we'll never have the extended family gatherings where ppl genuinely care for each other, where the company is what goes a long way to enriching the season.

 

But, I also don't have to deal w/the reality of my FOO, or MIL at the holidays, which would make things stressful and unpleasant. I need to be grateful for that, instead of missing what we never had.

 

I need to start some simple, easy, but enjoyable, low stress traditions.

[Cassy]

You know Ellie, I'd like to thank you for this thread. And thank you Justamouse, Diane and Farmgirl, Christmas now seems a little less daunting. I have a plan :001_smile:! You ladies provide wonderful support.

[hillfarm]

For those who feel stressed or depressed at Christmas, I'd like to share a bit of a sermon I heard many years ago that really resonated with me.

 

Emotional expectations: take time to figure out what things make you get into the holiday spirit, or that might cause that to happen if it normally doesn't. Things like warm, fuzzy socks, shaped Christmas cookies, or pine scented candles, etc. Get those things ready so that they can help shape your mood to get you started well and to carry you through the rough spots.

 

Material expectations: most people want both to give and get good gifts. It's not too hard to find people to whom it is fun to give good gifts, but it can be tough if the special people in your life are challenged in the giving department. Try giving them a list with several possibilities and a range of prices. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want. Many people are very relieved to not have to try to guess. Some people, like my dh, really can't just tell.:glare:

 

Also examine yourself - what is it about certain gifts that make them appeal to you? It's fine to want gifts that show love, attention to your preferences, or appreciation. It is much harder to be satisfied if you measure your self worth by the gift that someone else might choose for you. Remember that gifts often say more about the giver than about the receiver.

 

Relationship expectations: most of us long to be with people where we feel that we belong, where everyone is getting along well, and where we feel appreciated and accepted. Not everyone finds those things within the confines of their biological family. It is perfectly fine to gather around you a group of people - even if you're not related to them - who can help you feel these things during the holiday season. Let the good relationships shine and help banish the bad ones back into obscurity. Paraphrasing Dr. Seuss here, but remember that those who care are the ones who matter and those that don't care don't really matter that much after all.

 

Spiritual expectations: obviously Christmas is an important religious holiday for Christians, but it seems that it is also a spiritually significant time of year for people of many different beliefs. Take time to ponder what the holiday season means to you spiritually, and then take steps to honor that. Place symbolically significant items in your home to remind you, Listen to sacred music that lifts up your beliefs. Go to important places and do important things that fill you spiritually during the holiday season.

 

And finally, be on guard against those things that would steal or prevent your joy during the holiday season. Avoid them if you can - hell probably won't freeze over if you miss the event just this once. And you might gain valuable insight by taking a little time off. Tell the person that has just requested too much of you that your gift to yourself this season is the gift of being able to say no. "So, thanks, really. But No."

 

If you can't avoid them, try to frame them in a different way. For example, Uncle John always says inappropriate things - vow to count his remarks and give yourself an equal number of pedicures or other treats during the upcoming year (sort of like a non-destructive college drinking game!). You'll find yourself responding to his ridiculous remarks with a slight smile and cryptic comments like, "peach, with glitter, I think...". You can't shut him up, but you can refuse to let him make you feel bad.

 

HTH someone. I wish a wonderful holiday season for us all.

[Mommy22alyns]

Ugh, I'm just not looking forward to it because MIL always expects us to go visit or go traipsing up to BIL's, and I just can't handle it. Hopefully we can get out of that because of DH's job. My other problem is what to get the girls?? I need to cut it out completely because they're now almost too old for toys. They have everything under the sun and we don't have room for one. more. thing. I want to do experiences, but what to do?

[Scrub Jay]

This year we have an extra-special Christmas Surprise!!!:001_wub: (See my siggie)

 

I can't wait!!! (I probably should get the shopping done early this year, huh?)

 

I'm due 12/20 so my plan is to have everything bought and wrapped before Thanksgiving. :willy_nilly:

[Parrothead]

I bought birthday presents today. Now I'm working on Christmas lists.

[Cassy]

And finally, be on guard against those things that would steal or prevent your joy during the holiday season. Avoid them if you can - hell probably won't freeze over if you miss the event just this once. And you might gain valuable insight by taking a little time off. Tell the person that has just requested too much of you that your gift to yourself this season is the gift of being able to say no. "So, thanks, really. But No."

 

If you can't avoid them, try to frame them in a different way. For example, Uncle John always says inappropriate things - vow to count his remarks and give yourself an equal number of pedicures or other treats during the upcoming year (sort of like a non-destructive college drinking game!). You'll find yourself responding to his ridiculous remarks with a slight smile and cryptic comments like, "peach, with glitter, I think...". You can't shut him up, but you can refuse to let him make you feel bad.

 

HTH someone. I wish a wonderful holiday season for us all.

 

:001_smile: Thank you Hillfarm :001_smile:. Your whole post was full of that wonderful practical wisdom I've come to expect of you, but the above in particular is what just might keep me smiling through the entire Christmas period.

[Rosie_0801]

Pathetic, aren't I?

 

No.

Over worked and under paid, yes. ;)

 

Tell me, please, how do you manage to have so much fun?

 

1. We watch the Muppets Christmas Carol every Christmas Eve, and when Dad and my sister complain, we happily shout at them that they didn't have to be here. They groan, we "Marley and Marley WOOOOO" at them, they groan some more, we all shout at Dad if he tries to sing to any of the songs etc. Christmas inevitably involves bickering and this is ritualised bickering. ;)

 

2. I stopped seeing my unpleasant extended family years ago. I don't like them, they don't like me and now we are all happy.

 

3. I refused to attend my inlaws family Christmas ever again after the first time because I've found maths exams more enjoyable. The second year, his father and mother agreed to meet at a park on Boxing Day for a casual do. This pleased the four of us until out of state SIL cracked the darks, so MIL and FIL remembered they hated the idea after all and chose to go on a cruise with a bunch of other rich, old people also avoiding their children. The year after that, they remembered they thought a picnic on Boxing Day was a really good idea and we all had a relaxed time of it each year until last when FIL was too unwell to see anyone. This year I expect the ex will make his mother see the kids, and maybe SIL will lay down the law because there is no one left she can't bully. But that's his issue, not mine.

 

4. I cook what I want to cook. If someone wants something I don't want to cook, they can organise it themselves. They don't usually bother, but sometimes they do.

 

5. The people who are invited to our Christmas do are free to come and go as they please providing they let me know roughly what time food is to be served. Usually my father and sister wander in on Christmas Eve and wander out again after breakfast the next morning. The one year they didn't let me know when they were coming, they got the previous night's left overs for dinner because we thought dinner was to be the following day, lol. None of us enjoyed the obligations and guilt trips of our childhood, so we don't do them now. Everyone does more or less what they like. If my sister wants to whinge about the food, which she only does if I cook, she gets told she could do it herself next year and pay for the lot. She pouts and shuts up. ;)

 

6. I only write the Christmas cards I like to write.

 

7. I am a bit tight with money so I can afford to be a little indulgent at Christmas time. I also shop gradually over the course of the year so the expense doesn't hurt. I don't buy lots of stuff, but I like to be able to buy good stuff. I also like to hand make the kids something each year, so I have to get to work early on those things. Doing presents this way makes the giving of presents a joy rather than a chore. (For me.) It's like the grand finale of a year long show rather than a smeggy social obligation that involved over crowded shopping malls. Oh how I love online book sellers. :D

 

 

Rosie