DD does better with male instructors?

[Dmmetler]

This summer, DD7 started doing ballet technique with a male teacher, and in watching on the monitor, she seemed much more focused and put together with him than she does with her female teachers. Today, in tumbling, she had a male coach, and, again in watching the class, she was MUCH more focused, and, while when she's had a new female coach it often takes her several weeks to feel confident and she'll become very nervous and unwilling to try, if anything she was MORE willing to push herself and try things without excessive handholding.

 

She's commented that the male dance teacher doesn't make her feel nervous the way some of the other ones she's had do (and I can kind of understand that-the two teachers she mentioned both are kind of high strung in personality), and I think the same might be in play here-the male gymnast seemed to have just a very relaxed, non-stressed personality, even when he was spotting the teenagers and maybe that's what she's responding to?

 

Anyway, it's kind of strange....

[DianeW88]

My dd prefers male dance teachers with the exception of studying pointe....and in fact, most of her higher level ballet teachers have always been men.

[Rebel Yell]

Diamond also did well with male teachers. For both ballet and Tap. It;s too bad her current school doesn't have any- other than as a sub. I think it could also be that the rest of the class behaves differently and it;s easier for her to focus.

[celticmom]

My dd7 seems to do better at an activity where there are more males than she did at dance. I suspect it is because she is less likely to get sympathy if she has a meltdown and flops on the floor and refuses to move(she did this at dance once).

[Lolly]

Not strange. Extremely normal.

[Dmmetler]

My dd7 seems to do better at an activity where there are more males than she did at dance. I suspect it is because she is less likely to get sympathy if she has a meltdown and flops on the floor and refuses to move(she did this at dance once).

 

 

I wonder if this is part of it-DD tends to react to any thought that she might not be able to do something by tearing up and just plain stopping, and the worst thing to do in that situation is to cajole or coax her-and it may be that the men are less likely to do that, so she recovers faster.

 

It does make me question whether my being her primary teacher is a good thing-maybe I should let Daddy do more schooling? (Of course, that would put us doing school starting at about 8:00 PM, which might not be the best idea!)

[Mandy in TN]

I wonder if this is part of it-DD tends to react to any thought that she might not be able to do something by tearing up and just plain stopping, and the worst thing to do in that situation is to cajole or coax her-and it may be that the men are less likely to do that, so she recovers faster.

 

It does make me question whether my being her primary teacher is a good thing-maybe I should let Daddy do more schooling? (Of course, that would put us doing school starting at about 8:00 PM, which might not be the best idea!)

Perhaps, but perhaps not,

because...

 

My kids pick up negatively on emotional instructors too. They always do better with someone who can remain professional. Men seem to be able to maintain the calm and push gently more than women.

This is a generalization. Not in dancing but in music, my ds responds well to people who are organized, have an authority to their presence, and require him to do what he is capable of doing. Often these people have been men.

 

I think it is more individual personality than male/female. My son had a male teacher for dance one year and I noticed the kids (mostly girls) walked all over the poor guy. He was not good at crowd control.

:iagree:There have been some women who can instruct ds well and some men who can't. It has been my experience that a person who may be brilliant in their artistic field may not make a wonderful instructor, due to lack of organization, authority, or the inability to gauge what to require of students.

 

HTH-

Mandy

[Danestress]

But I think many females are more inclined to want to impress males than they are other females. She may be less inclined to tear up and stop trying when a man is around because she doesn't want to embarrass herself in front of a man.

[*Michelle*]

It might just go back to the whole mommy/daddy relationship. Kids look to mom for comfort and dad for approval.

[DianeW88]

My dd7 seems to do better at an activity where there are more males than she did at dance. I suspect it is because she is less likely to get sympathy if she has a meltdown and flops on the floor and refuses to move(she did this at dance once).

 

Yeah, my dd's dance male teacher would have made her leave class if she did that. Very matter-of-factly, but she would have been sitting in the hall for the remainder of class.

 

I think male teachers are less likely to put up with student antics than the female ones. At least my dd's Russian teachers were. :lol:

[catz]

 

:iagree:There have been some women who can instruct ds well and some men who can't. It has been my experience that a person who may be brilliant in their artistic field may not make a wonderful instructor, due to lack of organization, authority, or the inability to gauge what to require of students.

 

HTH-

Mandy

 

:iagree: I've seen this in the music, dance, and theater worlds.

 

I do think male teachers don't put up with as much "drama" in the classroom (or wherever) either. I think about my son's last 2 theater experiences with male directors - they were super no nonsense. The last female director he had was much more laid back (it actually drove my kid nuts). I wish I could find more male teachers for my daughter. I love her violin teacher (female), but I do think she would step more in line for a male teacher.

Edited August 16, 2012 by kck

[Rebel Yell]

...There have been some women who can instruct ds well and some men who can't. It has been my experience that a person who may be brilliant in their artistic field may not make a wonderful instructor, due to lack of organization, authority, or the inability to gauge what to require of students.

:iagree:

I am not so impressed by an instructor with a fabulous performing career- sometimes, our best teachers have had little professional experience but have a great love of teaching- and a true gift for it.

 

....

 

I think male teachers are less likely to put up with student antics than the female ones. At least my dd's Russian teachers were. :lol:

 

Ahh, the Russian teachers- how we miss them! They sound liek they're yelling at you even when they're complimenting you. :001_wub:

[sparrow]

My dd was very shy and did not do well with female leadership in scouting activities. I was wary of placing dd in athletic activities where there would be male leadership, as I thought dd would be more withdrawn. Ha! She thrived.

 

I realize this is a generalization, but men typically aren't going to make "pet projects" out of shy kids, like some women we've dealt with, are wont to do. In our experience, men are likely to be more business-like in their instruction and less likely to try to "pull someone out of their shell" and "talk things out". Things my daughter did not want to do! She likes a straight forward approach.