Would you move to

[indigomama]

Would you move to the middle of nowhere, if you or DH got a job?

 

A town under 25,000 with not major metropolis for over 3 hours in either direction.

 

No major stores ie: target, costco, trader joes, etc

 

No major art or music or culture available.

 

Four days drive from family (there are some distant relatives there, whom you have met).

 

The pluses though. Decent job, decent pay, decent kind of people.

 

Thoughts?

[amy g.]

Heck yes. I would love it!

[Starr]

Hmmm, no town for 3 hours? No colleges? Really nothing for 3 hours is hard until you have lived there long enough to have friends and a routine you like. On the other hand a good job is a lovely thing.

[Annie G]

As young as your kids are, yes, probably for at least a while. Think of the money you'll save by not having anywhere to spend it.g

[marbel]

Hm... we might be doing that. I hate the idea - I like living in the suburbs close to a big city. I admit I like easy shopping.

 

But if it was for a good job, and our family needed it... yeah, I guess I'd go. And maybe learn to love it!

[TravelingChris]

No, we couldn't. We have medical problems that wouldn't have doctors for them in that small of a community.

[justamouse]

That's a really hard decision, and it would have to be weighed very carefully.

 

How close to family are you-or want to be?

 

Is the raise worth the cost it might cause your family?

 

You will have to work hard at making new friends-is that something you're able to do?

 

HOw much will Dh be working?

 

Is this temporary or lifelong?

 

Would living like this be a huge lifechange for you? The kids?

 

It's possible, but not everyone would be happy in such a situation. THe question is, would you end up being miserable and alone out there?

[Aggie]

Does your dh have a job now or is he changing jobs? Will this job be (relatively) secure? Is there ever any chance of re-locating within the company?

 

IMO, having a job is much more important than having Target close by.

[*********]

In a HEARTBEAT.

 

I *want* to do that. Problem is, dh's line of work is usually in larger cities.

[lmrich]

It would not be my first choice. If it was my only choice I would adapt and get Amazon Prime!

[Parrothead]

Oh, I've already done that. Twice.

 

Never ever again will I do that. It was spirit killing.

 

 

The only way I'd consider it is if it was the only job dh or I could get prior to our savings running out. Then I'd do every thing in my power to get out of there as soon as humanly possible. I'd apply for every opening all across the country in order to get back to civilization.

[blessed3x]

For me, a lot would depend on how long dh would be looking at staying there. ;)

 

If it were a stepping stone and only for a couple of years - yes.

 

If there was not any chance of advancement and getting to move in a few year- no.

 

As young as your kids are it could be worth it for your family for a few years.

[catz]

No, never. We live in a large city. We love it.

[elegantlion]

We're in a small town, but we're 30 minutes from bigger town and big city. We have Walmart and Dollar General and that's about it for chain shopping. It's worked out well because I don't spend money, but 3 hours away would be too isolated for me.

[Mandy in TN]

Would you move to the middle of nowhere, if you or DH got a job?

Of course. If the options were job in the middle of nowhere or no job, we would be there in a heartbeat- especially since these were your major complaints:

 

A town under 25,000 with not major metropolis for over 3 hours in either direction.

 

No major stores ie: target, costco, trader joes, etc

 

No major art or music or culture available.

 

Four days drive from family

 

If you had said that you needed to be in a larger city for medical reasons or that you needed to be near your family because they needed you or you needed them for a specific reason that could not be handled by other family or outside services, then I may would have suggested other options. However, under the circumstances given in your post, I would start packing joyfully. I would be thankful dh had a job and graciously tell him that I would go with him wherever- even nowheresville.

 

If the thought of such a place filled me with sadness, I would stipulate that monthly or bi-monthly visits to the city or family would need to be part of the budget for my sanity and for the health of our marriage.

 

HTH-

Mandy

[Desert Rat]

I'm a city girl. I would have a hard time with small town living, especially if there were no stores for 3 hours. That said, yes, I probably would move for a good job and good pay. My ds12 is like me and wouldn't like it. But, my dh and ds9? They would be in heaven!

[Mothersweets]

We did it. We have a Walmart about 25 minutes away and a small grocery store right in town. It has taken some getting used to but after almost 8 years I couldn't imagine living in a bigger city.

 

Your internet connection will become very important to you. :)

 

One thing that I LOVE about living in a very small town is how easy everything is: going to the bank is fast, popping into the grocery store for a jug of milk is fast, no waiting at the post office and the clerks there are super nice. It is something I never would have realized before living here.

 

I say go for it!

[besroma]

We did it. We have a Walmart about 25 minutes away and a small grocery store right in town. It has taken some getting used to but after almost 8 years I couldn't imagine living in a bigger city.

 

Your internet connection will become very important to you. :)

 

One thing that I LOVE about living in a very small town is how easy everything is: going to the bank is fast, popping into the grocery store for a jug of milk is fast, no waiting at the post office and the clerks there are super nice. It is something I never would have realized before living here.

 

I say go for it!

 

:iagree: I would find really nice property, preferably with a creek, pond, or woods for exploring.

 

Would you enjoy having chickens? They are fun!

[sparkygirl]

Oh, I've already done that. Twice.

 

Never ever again will I do that. It was spirit killing.

 

 

The only way I'd consider it is if it was the only job dh or I could get prior to our savings running out. Then I'd do every thing in my power to get out of there as soon as humanly possible. I'd apply for every opening all across the country in order to get back to civilization.

 

I also did this once exact same set up of 3 hours to anything. We had a local grocery store that had only shelf stable foods. Super Walmart was an hour away.

 

I would look really hard into this decision before making it. Is this a step in the right direction, are you sure that the people are supportive and welcoming. I thought the folks in my town were but turned out that I stepped into a political mess and regretted the decision soon after arriving with no way out.

[Dinsfamily]

Sounds like where I grew up. I would do it if my dc were little and plan to move before high school. We had a very high teen pregnancy rate because there wasn't much else to do.

 

Dh and I are raising our dc in a city and I miss a lot about living in a rural area.

[jujsky]

It would depend on how desperate the situation was. If DH had been looking for a long, long time, we were broke, and this might be our only option, then yes. If there was a reasonable chance of him finding a job somewhere less rural and closer to family, no.

[Carrie75]

I would love it! The town reminds me of the one on the pioneer woman blog.

[Catwoman]

My first indication would be to say NO.

 

But are you in a situation where your dh really needs this job? Because if you are, you might have to suck it up and deal with it for a while.

 

What is the town like? 25,000 people isn't too tiny, so there must be some stores, a library, and some local recreational programs, right? Or is this place really in the middle of nowhere and the 25,000 people are spread far and wide?

 

Honestly, my biggest concern would be the distance to good medical care. I know people tend to believe they're young and healthy, and if someone gets sick, they can drive a distance to see a doctor, but accidents can happen, and time can be of the essence if a kid takes a bad fall and hits his head.

 

I know. I'm a paranoid idiot for worrying about stuff like that, but I know how quickly tragedy can strike, and it's very important for me to live near a major hospital with a trauma center. Not everyone is a nut like I am, though, so if my worries don't matter to you, feel free to ignore me completely!

 

I have to say that teeny-tiny town living would be tough for me, never having lived that way, but if it was the only option available to us, I would deal with it -- and who knows, I might love it!

 

I guess, in order for us to give a truly honest answer to your question, we need to know if your dh truly needs this job, as well as a description of the town/area to which you would be moving.

 

No Target might not be the end of the world, but NO NOTHING would be a major deal-killer for me. We go shopping and eat out several times a week, and I'm the kind of person who would go stir-crazy if I felt like I was stuck in the house for very long. It's rare when we stay at home all day long on any day, let alone trying to do it most of the time, so I would need to have somewhere to go and something to do, even if it wasn't anything super-exciting. (I'm also not particularly outdoorsy, so things like hiking would do absolutely nothing to relieve my boredom. I need to shop! And go for coffee! And yes, I know I'm shallow; it's a way of life.)

Edited August 15, 2012 by Catwoman

[Shellydon]

Yes, but that isn't the 'middle of nowhere' to me since I have lived in a town under 1000 people hours from a large city.

[Unicorn.]

25,000 is not small, so saying under 25,000 could mean a pretty decent sized town. Yes, I would go. I hate cities and prefer wide open spaces with lots of trees. No trees would be the deal breaker for me. As long as they have a grocery store and decent medical care is available w/ in 60 miles, I would go!

[justLisa]

It depends what kind of person you are and what you like.

 

I would die. However I have an aunt in another state that moves when too many people start showing up :lol:.

 

I need the city. Which is weird because I don't like being around people much. I need the stuff around. I hate driving hours to do anything.

[indigomama]

Wow- thank you some great responses!

 

More details:

Dh would need to commit very long term. It would not be a take it until something better comes along type job.

 

We are currently, financially at the bottom of the barrel. Our only other option is for DH to stay and and go back to school, which would mean more school loans.

 

The new place is geographically, very "foreign" to me. Flat nothingness and fields.

 

Can't buy a house, because we can't sell our current one, rentals will be very slim pickings.

 

No, Target isn't a big deal, but I do need to do some shopping and there is no cultural scene, at all. Very small community college. Yes, they have a library.

 

As somebody else mentioned, I'm afraid it would be very spirit crushing. But, I am tired of struggling so hard financially.

 

And my mom, who is already a state away would be livid:D

[Kathryn]

It would not be near my ideal. My ideal would be country living close to a mid-sized city with shopping, libraries, activities, etc.

[Catwoman]

Wow- thank you some great responses!

 

More details:

Dh would need to commit very long term. It would not be a take it until something better comes along type job.

 

We are currently, financially at the bottom of the barrel. Our only other option is for DH to stay and and go back to school, which would mean more school loans.

 

The new place is geographically, very "foreign" to me. Flat nothingness and fields.

 

Can't buy a house, because we can't sell our current one, rentals will be very slim pickings.

 

No, Target isn't a big deal, but I do need to do some shopping and there is no cultural scene, at all. Very small community college. Yes, they have a library.

 

As somebody else mentioned, I'm afraid it would be very spirit crushing. But, I am tired of struggling so hard financially.

 

And my mom, who is already a state away would be livid:D

 

Honestly, it sounds like I would hate it. But the sentence I bolded from your post is the thing that would make me go for it.

[regentrude]

Yes.

We have done that. We left our home country and native language and moved several thousand miles from family for DH's job, to a town with under 20k population and two hours drive to the next city.

 

I really struggled at first, coming from an 800 year old city of half a million with any kind of culture you can imagine.

I still dislike the town, but we like our jobs and the area, and we have found some friends.

[Mimm]

I would if I was desperate. :( How long would he have to commit to this?

[klmama]

25,000 is a lot more people than you think. There are probably several churches to choose from and numerous activities in which you and your dc can get involved. The community college being there means there are at least some others in the area who value education; it might be worth making the acquaintance of the instructors. :) You can go online to order anything you need, and you can still expose your dc to whatever you'd like via internet, Netflix, and books. You can plan a trip to the city every 3-6 months for a weekend of shopping and "live" culture. And, bottom line, your dh will earn the money your family needs. I'd go.

[justLisa]

Wow- thank you some great responses!

 

More details:

Dh would need to commit very long term. It would not be a take it until something better comes along type job.

 

We are currently, financially at the bottom of the barrel. Our only other option is for DH to stay and and go back to school, which would mean more school loans.

 

The new place is geographically, very "foreign" to me. Flat nothingness and fields.

 

Can't buy a house, because we can't sell our current one, rentals will be very slim pickings.

 

No, Target isn't a big deal, but I do need to do some shopping and there is no cultural scene, at all. Very small community college. Yes, they have a library.

 

As somebody else mentioned, I'm afraid it would be very spirit crushing. But, I am tired of struggling so hard financially.

 

And my mom, who is already a state away would be livid:D

 

Ok I am in the NW. Seattle area. I *have* lived in a middle of nowhere place around here a few hours away that then built up more......pm me if you don't want to say where. Maybe I can give you some ideas.

 

Honestly I think financial hardship is of the worse kind. If you have a solid family and go in to this thinking something great is going to come of it I think it's a good idea. Just keep your head up, and if you do it don't think of what you don't have. And there is always Amazon :D

[peachskittles]

We live in a city of 8,000. We have a Super Walmart, a couple grocery stores and a Dollar General, in addition to random shops on Main St. We are an hour and a half to major cities that have Target and other shopping places. We do have a hospital in the city and I believe the city a half hour away has a bigger hospital. In a true emergency, they can fly you to the big city. As much as I dislike the distance from civilization, we make it work. This was the only job available at the time and after 3 years, it's become home. It definetely wasn't my first pick but when you need a job, you take what you can get. I guess that's my way of saying, yes, I would do it. :tongue_smilie: 25,000 people is a lot more than any city near us. I don't know what I would do with that many people. :lol:

 

I had to google before I posted this. Our ENTIRE county has 17k people. Wherever you are moving too sounds awesome compared to here. :)

[Mona]

Yep. We actually did that except we do have a Target about 1 hour and 20 minutes away. It wasn't there when we first moved here though. They put it up around the mall. We do have two small grocery stores nearby for the town and there are little mom and pop shops for things.. Of course, we have a WM about 25 minutes away. Aren't they everywhere? We have a cell phone tower now, but didn't always. This WAS the place people went to disconnect.

Now, with cell phones and internet, you are always in touch.

 

I have grown to like it and I would even go more rural now. I've gotten used to shopping online and it is so much more convenient to order something and have UPS/FedEx deliver it than to go to a store and look around for something and they not have it. Life is much simpler now..I would make the move.

[Word Nerd]

We moved to an area that fits several items in that description. We've had to make some adjustments, but the Internet makes the world a lot smaller. Although the cultural offerings may be different from what you're used to, they exist in rural, remote areas too.

Edited August 15, 2012 by WordGirl

[myfunnybunch]

YES.

 

I want to move to my father's town, with a population less than 10,000. There are still plenty of activities for families and the people are wonderful.

 

I don't think I'd want to love there forever, but it would be lovely with younger children. :)

 

Cat

[Plucky]

Ok I am in the NW. Seattle area. I *have* lived in a middle of nowhere place around here a few hours away that then built up more......pm me if you don't want to say where. Maybe I can give you some ideas.

 

Honestly I think financial hardship is of the worse kind. If you have a solid family and go in to this thinking something great is going to come of it I think it's a good idea. Just keep your head up, and if you do it don't think of what you don't have. And there is always Amazon :D

 

I agree. As long as everyone is healthy and happy then I'd move to where we wouldn't struggle as much financially. I've been poor and it is stressful.

[Starr]

When by kids were younger I scheduled one day a week to go to the city 2 hours away. I signed the kids up for a class so we would be sure and go. We listened to great audiobooks, went to museums, and had a great day. But gas was cheaper. I would still try to get a membership to something and go at least once a month. Really you'll go crazy but many people do it. :grouphug:

[Tap]

Not unless I was desperate.

[indigomama]

So, many things to think about. Glad I posted. It has really helped to hear everyone's perspectives.

[Just Kate]

I would do it! My husband has been without a job before and if it took moving to a small town for my husband to have a good career, it would be worth it to me.

[prairiewindmomma]

I'd consider it, if we didn't have major medical needs in our family.

 

Target, Old Navy, and amazon can all deliver there. :) Chances are you can also get netflix streaming.

 

At 25,000, chances are you can find fast food and a decent grocery store.

 

Most libraries have interlibrary loan; there's also paperbackswap.

 

Most towns of that size have several doctors and a pharmacy or two. Some towns that size here have small hospitals. For truly emergent care, they have heliocopters that can take you to big hospitals.

 

Chances are, housing is cheap.

[Outdoorsy Type]

I would move to a place like that if it fit my family's needs. We would want a good amount of churches to choose from and lots of wilderness area for hiking/camping . :D I'm not a "city person" so as long as I had outdoor things to do and a church community I would be fine.

[littlebug42]

I wouldn't do it for any reason. I might enjoy something like that for a few days but not to live. I am a city person and my entire family is also involved with local arts organizations. We would all be miserable in a week.

[Myeightkiddies]

Taking into consideration your current situation, I would suggest that you do it. It seems to be the best option for now. During this time pay down your debt and start saving.

 

Most anything can be purchased through the Internet. As mentioned Amazon Prime is great if you order a lot through Amazon.

 

While there is less there, it doesn't mean that there isn't anything to do. Once you are settled, I'm sure you will discover more things, including homeschool group opportunities.

 

Keep in mind this doesn't have to be forever. It just needs to be for now. If, after getting your finances in order and feeling more secure, you want to move, have Dh search for a better paying job in a location more desirable.

 

We lived in a location similar to what you described (small town with limited shopping/activities) for fifty years. Last month we moved to an area that is the opposite. We are loving it as it is such a change. As I mentioned, it doesn't have to be forever, but it seems best for now.

 

:grouphug:

[Catwoman]

I would move to a place like that if it fit my family's needs. We would want a good amount of churches to choose from and lots of wilderness area for hiking/camping . :D I'm not a "city person" so as long as I had outdoor things to do and a church community I would be fine.

 

I'm a city-loving person who doesn't go to church and hates outdoorsy stuff like hiking and camping, so it looks like you and I will probably never live in the same town! :D

 

But I would move to a remote area in a minute if it was necessary for our financial security. What good is it to live in your ideal location, if you're constantly worried about how you'll pay the bills? I could never be happy if I was worried about money. Fortunately, we're not in that situation, but if we were, I would make whatever sacrifices I needed to make, in order to have financial peace of mind.

Edited August 15, 2012 by Catwoman

[catz]

I'm a city-loving person who doesn't go to church and hates outdoorsy stuff like hiking and camping, so it looks like you and I will probably never live in the same town! :D

 

But I would move to a remote area in a minute if it was necessary for our financial security. What good is it to live in your ideal location, if you're constantly worried about how you'll pay the bills? I could never be happy if I was worried about money. Fortunately, we're not in that situation, but if we were, I would make whatever sacrifices I needed to make, in order to have financial peace of mind.

 

:iagree:

[Bluegoat]

I've lived in places that small, and smaller. I would be pretty surprised if there were really no "cultural scene". It may just be a little different or more difficult to find than in a bigger city.

 

When I lived in a town half that size it looked kind of barran to me at first as well. I discovered that it had a lot of interesting things going on, like a talented potter who offered classes out of her house, an amateur painting group, an annual, huge, seedy Saturday event with neat workshops and lectures (including from a famous environmentalist/singer), all kinds of sewing and rug-hooking groups, a very active parent support center with interesting kids programs, lots of really good minor league sports teams... really more than I could ever do

 

Even my dad's town of 5000 has an excellent local theatre, a geology festival, several weekly open mic nights and a band weekly at the band-stand in good weather, and a monthly movie night in the hall, two citizen's marching bands, and a citizen's choir. Most of it is free or very cheap too.

 

I would look more into the town if possible. With no other center for three hours, they likely make their own fun one way or another. And no big chains sounds awesome to me - an easy way to spend my money at locally owned businesses.

[TranquilMind]

Would you move to the middle of nowhere, if you or DH got a job?

 

A town under 25,000 with not major metropolis for over 3 hours in either direction.

 

No major stores ie: target, costco, trader joes, etc

 

No major art or music or culture available.

 

Four days drive from family (there are some distant relatives there, whom you have met).

 

The pluses though. Decent job, decent pay, decent kind of people.

 

Thoughts?

 

Well, of course. I go where my husband goes. But I'd most look at things like: 1) Will my husband be happier and his stress reduced? 2) Can I drive to some things I need like Costco and TJ or organize my life so this can be done? 2) Can we find a good house for our family? 4) Churches?