How do you balance between children? With 5, 6 and under...

[aprilsblessings]

Ok, I seem for some reason to be at a stand still with getting all of our subjects going. I can't seem to decide the best way to schedule our schooling (daily) so that it isn't as crazy as it was. Maybe I am dreaming and it will just be this crazy for awhile with the ages of kids I have??:lol:

 

My kids are 6 1/2 1st grader, 5 K, 3 1/2 year old, 1 1/2 year old, baby due at the end of October.

 

I have toys and educational things for the youngers but my problem is actually with my older. He fights me a lot and so we were only getting phonics, math, and maybe some copywork and then I was sooooo ready to be done! So I am trying to figure out when the best time is to do these subjects with him and then with my next dd and still manage everyone else without losing it. Can anyone relate?

 

Some options I have come up with:

• A somewhat strict schedule that lays out what each child is doing at every moment. (Then how do you get them to do that at these ages, right?):tongue_smilie:
  
• Try to do a round table with the subjects, get them started, then help the next one, then go back, and so on.
  
• Do my sons phonics and math at rest time (not ideal because I would like a rest too).
  
• ???
  

Any other ideas of what has worked with your family when you have many little ones who are unable to do independent work?

 

TIA!

[LittleIzumi]

WORKBOXES! Google Sue Patrick, but I have a set of stacking drawers for each kid with Velcroed cards on each drawer. They are to go through each item in order, and move the card to a wall chart with Velcro dots when they are done. I have items to be done with me followed by an independent activity so I can go back and forth between them and they can stay on track. Like I might have math for the older and coloring in the younger's, then a book to read with a 12-min timer next in the older's drawers and math in the younger's drawer. Then phonics in the older's bin and Legos in the younger's next drawer. Etc, etc. We can just keep rolling until everything is done.

 

I will start it in the fall though, so I can't say how well it worked. But it works GREAT for a lot of families.

[SorrelZG]

There is stuff we can all do together at the table which I start as they are eating breakfast. My second born won't be five until September so not "officially" a Ker and I only need about 15 minutes with her. She's happy to give me 15 minutes of her time even if the others are playing (and they can usually do so without disaster for 15 minutes). The one-on-one stuff for my first grader waits until nap time. We have a 2 (or so) hour nap/quiet time so I can get done with DS and still have time to myself for whatever I need to do (he goes off to his own quiet time when we're done).

[PeterPan]

You have two separate issues. One is the craziness, the other is his resistance. Yes of course it's crazy with stairsteps, lol. Just gotta be very *realistic*. 1st is an extension of K5 mentally. You may be trying to do more than is actually *necessary*. (ha, somebody on this board? :D )

 

On the resistance, I'd back up and think about that a bit. Is it that he wants to play when the others are playing? Or is it that he's mirroring your stress and tension? (just making up things here) Sometimes what you're seeing at this age is a bit of attention issues or some vision problems or hand pain or something else that is coming out. It's worth looking into to figure out what is going on. Kids at that age *want to please*, so when it's not going well, there's a reason.

 

In the meantime, pare down to what has to be done (which is a lot less than what could be done) and set a timer for it. Stop when the timer goes off, no matter what. And at that age that timer might be 5-12 minutes. (was for my dd) Run around, stretch, jump on a trampoline, come back and do it for one more session. There's an awful lot of school that can be sneaky school, not sit down school, kwim? Like I'm doing the MFW K5 with my ds. Utterly, utterly adorable and easy to implement. That whole book basket time is hitting science, geography, history, Bible, and all that would be sneaky school. So to him school is the two sessions where he sits with you for 12 minutes with a timer, boom done. The rest is sneaky stuff you do during the day simply because it's fun. (read alouds, science labs, art, listening to music) That doesn't work forever, but it works for a while yet.

 

Definitely try to figure out why he's resisting, as it sounds like that's the bulk of the problem. You're already accepting of the chaos and reality end of things, lol. :)

[JR the hs dad]

I've been at this 10 years and I still haven't figured out a great way to deal with resistant children. However, I would not let the resistant child exhaust you at the expense of the youngers who are eager to work and learn. I've done that too much in the past and everybody loses: you get worn out, the resistant one realizes that and gets all the attention, and the eager one is shortchanged.

 

Because they need so much focused attention from you at this stage, also I don't know if you should plan lots of micro-hopping back and forth between them - enough of that will happen even without planning for it.

 

I would recommend first giving some thought to how you might change the dynamics with your older to circumvent some of the resistance. Again, there is no simple solution. What subjects is he more interested in? What is it that triggers resistance? Can you break up hard subjects into 2 shorter sessions instead of one longer one? Do you need to slow down in some subjects? I talk about this with my resistant kids and we try to figure out a variation that will work better.

 

Where possible, you can try to do subjects simultaneously. We can do sometimes do this with history, science, and reading. Usually, I'll try to get the older one going and then switch to the younger. If the older is stalling, switch away from him. You might even have some moments (math?) where you can turn from the resistant older and teach the same material to the younger one - she will probably relish it and might influence him.

 

Hopefully someone else will have some great ideas that we can both use!

[JudoMom]

I would focus on Math, Phonics, & Copywork. You should be able to get done with that in about an hour. Get SOTW on cd. Listen to it while he plays with Lego, draws, or does something else with his hands. Get some fun science kits and do them as time permits. Read a lot and/or listen to books on CD.

 

Call it good and enjoy your children.

 

If I could go back in time to when my 5 boys were 6 & under, this is what I would tell myself.

[MinivanMom]

Ok, I seem for some reason to be at a stand still with getting all of our subjects going. I can't seem to decide the best way to schedule our schooling (daily) so that it isn't as crazy as it was. Maybe I am dreaming and it will just be this crazy for awhile with the ages of kids I have??:lol:

 

My kids are 6 1/2 1st grader, 5 K, 3 1/2 year old, 1 1/2 year old, baby due at the end of October.

 

I have toys and educational things for the youngers but my problem is actually with my older. He fights me a lot and so we were only getting phonics, math, and maybe some copywork and then I was sooooo ready to be done! So I am trying to figure out when the best time is to do these subjects with him and then with my next dd and still manage everyone else without losing it. Can anyone relate?

 

 

Some options I have come up with:

• A somewhat strict schedule that lays out what each child is doing at every moment. (Then how do you get them to do that at these ages, right?):tongue_smilie: This is what we do!
  
• Try to do a round table with the subjects, get them started, then help the next one, then go back, and so on. I do this also, but it takes a lot of training and juggling.
  
• Do my sons phonics and math at rest time (not ideal because I would like a rest too). Don't do this unless you've run out of other options. You need your rest, especially if you are pregnant.
  
• ???
  

Any other ideas of what has worked with your family when you have many little ones who are unable to do independent work?

 

TIA!

 

Honestly . . . it will just be crazy for a little while. I also think your highest priority right now needs to be working on attitude and work habits with the oldest. Second priority is the basics with those oldest two, but good attitude and work habits are what make it possible to get the basics done. You might consider temporarily doing schoolwork during naptime to build some good habits while you can give the eldest all of your attention. Then you can adjust your schedule to free up that naptime for your personal time again.

 

This is my approach. I always have one who is little enough to still be napping in the morning. We start our schoolwork during that naptime. It gives us time to work with the littlest out of the picture, but still preserves the afternoon naptime for me to have a break. I build our entire schedule around the baby's nap schedule. Currently, the baby takes a morning nap around 8:30-9 am. Depending on when he wakes up from that nap, he takes his second nap around 12-1. I plan for dd8 and ds7 to do their seatwork (math, writing, French) as soon as I set the baby down for that first nap. I keep dd4 & ds2 busy at the table with quiet activities while we work. Then we move to the couch to read (read-alouds, history, science). Dd4 & ds2 go off to play while we are reading. If the baby wakes before we are finished (more often than not), then I can nurse him as we continue reading. We then have a little break to walk to the park and play before it's time for lunch and that second nap. Dd8 and ds7 have silent reading during that second naptime (while dd4 and ds2 are also napping), so I can have a little break and some quiet time.

 

Our schedule works for us, because . . .

1. It is built around the baby's natural rhythms (versus trying to get the baby to fit our routine).

2. The schedule takes priority, so that no one gets overtired (if something isn't finished quite yet then we just set it aside for the next day).

3. I've spent lots of time working on attitude and work habits with the older children.

 

You also have to let some things go. It's okay to only do math, phonics, and writing when your kids are very young and you are pregnant. If you only do the basics for the next six months (while you are in the last trimester and then have a newborn) . . . it will be okay. I know I let a lot of things slide this past year when I was morning sick. We were still getting the basics (math, reading, writing) done on a daily basis, so I figured it was okay. Now I have a 3-month-old and we're getting everything done easily.

 

Be kind to yourself at the end of your pregnancy and enjoy your newborn. Your kids are very little. There will be plenty of time for history timelines, science experiments, and messy art projects in six months time.

[blondeviolin]

I've got stairsteps too! This week is our first week back at school and we felt the stretch between Monday and Wednesday. The last two days, though, have gone really well! Before lunch, we get LA and math for my oldest and reading for my second oldest. After lunch, we do quiet time and then science or history. BUT my 6yo is a pleaser. At this point, school is still easy...and typically, if she can bring a stuffed friend, she's pretty amenable.

[ktgrok]

Remember that boys often are slower to be ready for seat work than girls, so your oldest and next oldest may be about the same level, and that is OK! Don't push too hard. If you get phonics and math and copy work done you are done as far as I am concerned. Let him watch some Magic Schoolbus for science, read to him at night, and voila.

[aprilsblessings]

WOW! I am so glad that I asked this here. You all are great!! I am seeing things a little differently and where I can tweak things.

 

Keep the ideas coming!!!

[missmoe]

I had 5 5 and younger at one point in time! I fit in phonics and math while in bed. I kept everything in a basket next to my bed. First thing in the morning, I let my 5 year-old crawl into bed with me and we worked on school. It worked for us because he felt he got special time with me, and I got that part of school done before I got up and got busy with everyone else and all the things I had to do around the house.

[2squared]

The way I keep my sanity is to not jump between kids. I have enough jumping to keep up with the babies and toddlers, that I can't handle scheduled jumps as well.

 

I sit down and work 1-on-1 with each kid, working straight through all their work. When kid #1 is done, I move on to kid #2. We work very efficiently and effectively this way, and the kids enjoy getting their individual time slot. I rarely extend individual time slots, but I do change how long we work on various subjects within their time slot. If we need to spend extra time on math, we take the time and then cut back on their next subject. I don't have to worry about anyone taking too long to complete something or getting done early and wondering away. I also know exactly when my day should be ending. Love that. It's a necessary part of keeping my sanity. :001_smile:

[hollyh]

another idea is to save one of the subjects your child is resisting for bedtime. my dd is happy to do phonics at night!

[Kaleidoscope]

I have 5 within a 3 year range. Until the were all over 7 it was chaos.

 

When my oldest 3 were in their first couple years of school i had a system for school.

 

I had what I wanted to accomplish divided up among 4 baskets which I kept on a bookshelf. It was sorted by subject. Inside the baskets it was further broken down by activity type. Mainly it was "with mom" and "on your own" as the 2 sub categories.

 

We did school several times a day. It centered around meal time, bath and bed time.

 

After breakfast we would clear the table and then I'd pull something They could do on their own. It was about a 5 minute activity if I was lucky. That gave me time to situate the younger kids. Then I'd come back to the table and do a "with mom" activity that lasted 10-15 minutes. If the kids happened to be really engaged we'd go longer. That rarely happened.

 

At lunch we did the opposite. Before lunch I'd do 19-15 minutes of lesson time. I followed with 5 minutes of independent work. Then it was nap time after lunch.

 

Snack time was story time. After snack we'd play a game or two which often was a learning activity.

 

At supper we did the same thing as lunch.

 

During bath time we would review school stuff using tub letters and numbers.

 

Then bed time was story time number 2.

 

And on errand days we would do thing in the car.

 

It felt disjointed at times. I panicked a lot. It worked though. It was low stress on the kids and eased us into seat work. They learned on time and they have great attitudes about learning.

 

The biggest hurdle for me was that I didn't often have a book or guide in front of me so I had to know what I was teaching. But at that young of an age it wasn't hard.

 

We still discuss things as we prep and clear meals. We still discuss school in the car. For us weaving it into our routines helped make it a way of life.

[PeterPan]

Remember that boys often are slower to be ready for seat work than girls, so your oldest and next oldest may be about the same level, and that is OK!

 

Although there is statistically a 6 month gap with boys and girls at this age on some skills, it's also true that boys comprise the bulk of the kids in speech therapy and getting certain SN labels.