CactusPair Posted July 27, 2012 Share Posted July 27, 2012 Hi. I used to frequent this board a lot, but haven't visted for a long time. My ds will be 13 next month. He's always had notable sensory issues, motor skill challenges, and executive functioning gaps. He's always been intense, obsessive, anxious, etc. But he seemed to be doing very well. We've homeschooled since K. But now the ocd thoughts are getting out of control, making him miserable and frightened. We started seeing a child psychologist this week per ds's request. He came to be crying and seeking help! When he was younger, ASD seemed a strong possibility, but after he turned 7 he was notably more relaxed and adaptable. I thought he was "different", but didn't meet any criteria for a dx. He has a witty sense of humor, understands irony and tone-of-voice and facial expressions that convey thought/emotion. He seems empathetic and caring, though he's never had a friend and has no real interest in making one. He likes being around his immediate family and chatting with adults (music teacher, etc), but doesn't connect with kids his own age. But from some of the things he's told me, and some of the things the therapist said, I'm wondering if HFA may be a consideration afterall. If your child had a late dx, what factors led to finding a label that fits? Also, if your child has an ASD, does he/she also have OCD? thanks so much Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted July 27, 2012 Share Posted July 27, 2012 Our doctor's asked us to fill out several questionairres, interviewed DS and gave him several tests. Our diagnosis is not ASD but a mix of various issues. Here are some testing resouces online: Bipolar Information: http://www.jbrf.org/pdf/CBQ_Development.pdf Bipolar Questionnaire: http://www.jbrf.org/cbq/cbq_survey.cfm Scoring Guidelines: http://www.jbrf.org/pdf/cbq_srv.pdf http://www.psbmed.com/pdf/teenChildBipolarQuestionnaireForm.pdf Vanderbilt Assessment Tool: http://www.cap4kids.org/new_york_city/download/ADHDParent.pdf Scoring: http://www.nichq.org/toolkits_publications/complete_adhd/07Scoring%20Instructions.pdf http://www.autismspeaks.org/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beachnut Posted July 27, 2012 Share Posted July 27, 2012 If your child had a late dx, what factors led to finding a label that fits? My 15yo son was just diagnosed w/ Asperger's a few days ago, so this is all very new to me. I had never even heard of AS until 2-3 years ago. My son has always been a quirky kid and socially awkward, but I just thought it was his unique personality. I didn't know it was *called* something. Things got much more pronounced in high school -- 9th grade was really rough for us. These factors seemed to be noticeably worse this year: *Inability to make friends. (He has not made a new friend since elementary school. He's got 2 friends who he occasionally sees but not even on a weekly basis & never talks to them on the phone or via email or Facebook.) He even joined marching band at the local high school (and loves it) but did not make any friends. *Great difficulty w/ executive functioning (time management, planning, prioritizing, working efficiently, staying on task). *Lack of common sense. *Often appears to be "in a fog" where he just isn't paying attention to what you're saying or what he's doing. (We kept telling him he needs to "be present" more.) *Over-sensitivity to certain noises (his brother's whistling would send him in a tailspin). LOTS of fights over this issue. *Spending way too much time in his room by himself. DS did 9 hours of testing over the summer to finally get the AS diagnosis. (We have not told him the diagnosis yet.) We are just beginning the journey of where to go from here. Our two main areas of concern are social skills & executive functioning, so I guess that's where we'll begin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dobela Posted July 27, 2012 Share Posted July 27, 2012 My brother was diagnosed in his 30s with HFA/Aspergers. His came after a lifetime of struggle and then an inability to maintain a job. He loves people, but has few close friends because he can become very intense. He is very intelligent and has a great sense of humor. After the last job he lost due in his inability to adapt to stress, he began seeing a psychiatrist who made the diagnosis and also prescribed a mood stabilizer and anti-depressant to help with the anxiety and intense emotions he dealt with. The meds really helped him manage his own life much better althogh he will always need help with finances and so on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CactusPair Posted July 28, 2012 Author Share Posted July 28, 2012 Thanks so much for the replies. Beachnut, my ds sounds so much like yours! Executive functioning is a major challenge and what worries me most about his future. I'm kind of confused about what constitutes ASD these days...."quirky" now has a medical diagnostic code, it seems. My ds has a lovely sense of humor, is affectionate, and carries a conversation well. But then there are all those other characteristics....Right now OCD and anxiety are eating him alive, on top of everything else.:confused: Pretty scared for both of us! I also have to admit that if my ds gets a dx, then I may as well get one, too. We're so alike, though he's a little "quirkier" in some depts. My dh has been my only friend since we met in high school, and I only had a handful of friends growing up. But I've never felt lonely!!! I really like just being by myself. I don't get any of this to tell the truth! I don't feel "emotionless" at all;rather, it's the exact opposite. I'm intuitive, empathetic, analytical, and often overwhelmed by the intensity of being-ness. I think ds is the same way, though I'm not sure. The label is scary. I just want ds to be safe and healthy, to be able to work in a job he loves, to have a partner one day if he so chooses. As his mother I'm biased:001_smile:, of course, but he's the most beautiful, intriguing, wonder-full person I've ever known. thanks so much for the feedback Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom22ns Posted July 29, 2012 Share Posted July 29, 2012 The label is scary. I just want ds to be safe and healthy, to be able to work in a job he loves, to have a partner one day if he so chooses. Don't let the label scare you. My dh is an Aspie although he didn't know it until ds began having issues and was labeled ASD. Dh is safe, healthy, well paid in a job he at least likes;), married with two fantastic kids (if I do say so myself). Ds is a little quirkier than dh, but I expect he will be able to be/do all of those things too as he chooses. The diagnosis can help you understand how to help him and can help him get accommodations for his disability if he needs them along the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CactusPair Posted July 30, 2012 Author Share Posted July 30, 2012 Your reassurance means a lot to me! Thanks for sharing your experience! It helps to hear about people w/ an ASD living peaceful, fruitful lives characterized by self-determination and happiness. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dobela Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 Don't let the label scare you. My dh is an Aspie although he didn't know it until ds began having issues and was labeled ASD. Dh is safe, healthy, well paid in a job he at least likes;), married with two fantastic kids (if I do say so myself). Ds is a little quirkier than dh, but I expect he will be able to be/do all of those things too as he chooses. The diagnosis can help you understand how to help him and can help him get accommodations for his disability if he needs them along the way. :iagree: There are many successful, happily married people out there who have an Aspie diagnosis. I have a dear friend from high school that makes a fabulous living as a musician and composer who recently revealed his diagnosis. He has a wonderfully understanding wife and adorable children. Another Aspie friend is a homeschooling mom to 6 who works as a computer programmer on the side making way more money that I ever could. Aspie doesn't mean that someone will be forever dependent and lonely. My brother struggles, yes, but I honestly believe that his struggles are because he was never understood or adequately helped as a child. If my parents only knew then what parents know now and have access to.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom22ns Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 Your reassurance means a lot to me! Thanks for sharing your experience! It helps to hear about people w/ an ASD living peaceful, fruitful lives characterized by self-determination and happiness. :grouphug: I'll add that dh designs custom software (like so many Aspies). He is VERY good at what he does. The fact that he thinks differently is one of his greatest strengths in his job. When other programmers get stuck he is the one they go to for out of the box thinking. Being different is hard when you are young, but it is not always a disadvantage in life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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