Caroline Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 My DBIL is coming home from his third time in Iraq soon. This time, my sister has requested that we come for his homecoming. My family is going, and we are staying in a hotel. Would it be weird for me to bring some meals for them? We are just staying the one day and then leaving them alone. I just want to do something more. Last time, she didn't want us all to come, so we didn't. I sent a bunch of gift cards for American stuff, like restaurants, the Gap, beer, etc. What do you all think? Quote
Julie in CA Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 A mix of both of those ideas would be really nice. A few home-cooked meals, and then a nice dinner out. Not to get too sidetracked, but every single time I hear about soldiers returning home I dissolve into tears of gratitude. I'm sure it wouldn't mean much to your sister and brother-in-law, since I'm a stranger very far removed, but please try to pass along my thanks for their sacrifices. Blessings, Julie Edited to add: I just realized you were specifically asking for advice from military families--which we're not. Oops...sorry. Quote
TXMomof4 Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 My DBIL is coming home from his third time in Iraq soon. This time, my sister has requested that we come for his homecoming. My family is going, and we are staying in a hotel. Would it be weird for me to bring some meals for them? We are just staying the one day and then leaving them alone. I just want to do something more. Last time, she didn't want us all to come, so we didn't. I sent a bunch of gift cards for American stuff, like restaurants, the Gap, beer, etc. What do you all think? I think that is a great idea. And if they have kids.....watch the kids for even an hour to let them have just a few minutes to make goo-goo eyes at each other without the children. THAT is an invaluable gift! Quote
Kathleen in VA Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 My DBIL is coming home from his third time in Iraq soon. This time, my sister has requested that we come for his homecoming. My family is going, and we are staying in a hotel. Would it be weird for me to bring some meals for them? We are just staying the one day and then leaving them alone. I just want to do something more. Last time, she didn't want us all to come, so we didn't. I sent a bunch of gift cards for American stuff, like restaurants, the Gap, beer, etc. What do you all think? Not a military family now, but grew up in the military during the Viet Nam War. I remember my dad coming back to Norfolk on the U.S.S. Intrepid after his tour in VN and what a huge deal it was for us. Wow, three times to Iraq. Wow. Yes, please pass on my thanks as well. I can't imagine that meals would be unwelcome, and as long as you put them in containers that do not need to be returned and you're pretty sure you know what they like to eat, I'm fairly certain they would be very much appreciated. Quote
Mrs Mungo Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Honestly? If it were me? I tend to make DH all of his favorite meals when he gets back home. Depending on your relationship with you sister it *could* feel a little like you are horning in on that. I think babysitting the kids at least one night (if they have any) and (assuming money isn't an issue because this isn't necessary) giving them a gift card for the two of them to have dinner out would be a really nice gesture. When my MIL and her sister came to visit soon after my hubby came home from his first deployment they insisted on cooking (honestly, mostly stuff he doesn't like, but he hasn't lived with his mom since he was 15) and it felt really intrusive. Quote
Marie in Oh Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Honestly? If it were me? I tend to make DH all of his favorite meals when he gets back home. Depending on your relationship with you sister it *could* feel a little like you are horning in on that. I think babysitting the kids at least one night (if they have any) and (assuming money isn't an issue because this isn't necessary) giving them a gift card for the two of them to have dinner out would be a really nice gesture. When my MIL and her sister came to visit soon after my hubby came home from his first deployment they insisted on cooking (honestly, mostly stuff he doesn't like, but he hasn't lived with his mom since he was 15) and it felt really intrusive. They want normal, and they want food. The food they like. And that's usually what dw makes. But I really think the girft cards and the beer cards, and a little bit of alone time provided would hit the spot. We were in Alaska for vacation 6 years ago and visiting dear friends. The dad was supposed to have gotten home 72 hours before from a 4 month tour in the desert. When we arrived at their house, he wasn't there. His landing had been delayed and he was coming home that afternoon! Oh my. How awkward. We felt like we were crashing a very intimate party. We were so embarassed. They were extremely gracious having us there and everything. But geez. I was glad though that we were able to take all the kids outside and they could disappear for a little while. At least we could provide that much. ;) Quote
Caroline Posted July 10, 2008 Author Posted July 10, 2008 I was thinking it might be stepping on toes to make food. I will go with a visa gift card so they can use it wherever they like. I have offered to keep the kids. So far they have said no thanks. A couple of weeks after he returns, they are going to the beach for a few weeks. My parents are going to keep the kids for part of that time. Thanks for all the well wishes for my sister's family. When he gets back, he will have spent well over three years total in Iraq. Quote
Christine Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 My DBIL is coming home from his third time in Iraq soon. This time, my sister has requested that we come for his homecoming. My family is going, and we are staying in a hotel. Would it be weird for me to bring some meals for them? We are just staying the one day and then leaving them alone. I just want to do something more. Last time, she didn't want us all to come, so we didn't. I sent a bunch of gift cards for American stuff, like restaurants, the Gap, beer, etc. What do you all think? Wow, your sister is being very nice! Having family over directly after a deployment, I think, would be . . .hard (for us, anyway). I would ask your sister what she thinks / or would appreciate. Homecomings are *weird*! Each family that I know has different ways of dealing with them and different dynamics. (I've also notice this is true for each individual homecoming. . . they are all just so different and yet eerily similar.) But, seriously, I would ask your sister. She may very well have an idea of what she wants you there for, and it would be REALLY nice if you were on the same sheet as she. Quote
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